A/N: Hey guys. This chapter is short, so I'll upload two today, okay? :)
I blinked at her abruptness. I was suddenly overwhelmed by how much could have gone wrong last night. My world was not for her. The people I associated myself with did stupid shit like that all the time. She was much better than that, and I couldn't allow her to be dragged down to be with me.
"You know…" I took my hand from hers slowly, reluctantly, and I could see that I was going to hurt her with my next words. "You're right, I should… go."
She just sat there, not moving or saying anything. I was starting to get a little fucking worried. I got up and just fucking climbed over her, because what else could I do? Anything else I would say would just hurt her more. I went downstairs and slipped out the door. I went to my car, and I got in, and I just fucking sat there, staring at her window, wishing things could be different. I took a deep, unsteady breath and started the car. I got out of there in a fucking hurry, because I knew that if I saw her face again, all of my rational thinking would be toast.
When I got home, no one else was there- thank god- so I flipped on the TV, anxious and high strung and ready to just veg out. If time passed, I didn't notice. I thought, long and hard, about what the hell I was going to do. I would still see her every day for the next month and a half.
By the time I was done, I had decided three things.
I couldn't let her know how I actually felt. It would just hurt us both, and she probably wouldn't believe me anyway. She wouldn't accept it because of how I just fucking left today.
I couldn't let other people know how I actually felt. Not anybody. They would try to fuck with her, and fuck with me through her, and she would get hurt.
If I could protect her without her knowing, I absofuckinglutely would. I had power at the school- girls wanted to date me, guys wanted to be me- so I was sure this would be relatively easy.
School the next day was… an act. 100%. I sat in my first class just waiting for her to say something, equally hoping and dreading she would. I was barely listening to the words I was saying, mostly paying attention to her. When the guys from the party asked where I went afterwards, not that it was any of their fucking business, I told them to fuck off. No way in hell they were learning about that. Telling them that, now, would break two of my rules at once, because she would overhear. I had to keep her from this.
