Merlin was recovering, physically and mentally, doc said he was dealing well with the problem; he had got through the happy stage with it and was serious about it. Benny had come in to see him a few times as had everyone else. Even Uther had stopped by. They kept congratulating Arthur and saying how happy he must be but he wasn't Merlin was still distant and cold towards him, every second chipping away at his heart. He stayed though. He wasn't going to leave him, he couldn't. Eventually he would recover, he would wake up and smile at Arthur with his eyes and Arthur would tell him how happy he was to have him back. He never did though…

Doc had noticed. "Arthur, your miserable. Why? He'll be ready to go home in about a week."

"That's what's worrying me. I don't think he'll want to come home."

"Why wouldn't he?"

"Doc, he's still not back. Not for me anyway. I can't even look him in the eyes anymore. So much hatred, he's so cold, I feel like I've done something wrong. All I want to do is tell him how I've missed him but he just looks at me like I'm the odd one out in the room. Everyone else get his beaming smile and I just a glare."

"Have you talked to him about it?"

"I'm scared to, every time we talk he makes it clear he doesn't want to. He actually seems scared of my voice. When I try to touch him he winces and pulls away."

"Come in with us. I'll help you talk it out."

"I don't know doc."

"Arthur, if Merlin's reacting like that it could be important to know why."

"If it's important to Merlin then yes." He followed the Doc in to the hospital room Merlin was reading. He looked up and smiled.

"Hi, Doc!" He put the book down and sat attentively.

"Hey Merlin. I'm concerned by something's and I've been letting them go hoping they would sort them selves out but since they aren't I think the three of us need to have a chat." Merlin visually deflated at the mention of 'the three of us.' "That that's what I want to talk about. I'm confused you seem so pleased to be back among your loved ones except Arthur. You seem very unhappy that he's here." Arthur said nothing and focused all his attention on the floor.

"I just can't, not after every thing. I can't be happy to see him."

"What have I done Merlin?" Arthur cried unable to contain himself.

"You haven't done anything…consciously I know you haven't done anything but…"

"You haven't been telling me everything have you Merlin?" the Doc asked.

"No. I'm sorry, I just want to f…forget."

"You know that's not how it works Merlin."

"Yeah."

"What happened?" Doc's voice was still professional.

"I told you what h did. That was all true, every word of it but there was more, he was him in the good moments, when ever he was tender, it was his voice in the dark in those moments, him whose hand I ate from but when it got nasty, when it was painful. He was Arthur."

"What do you mean he was Arthur?"

"Jasper was a master of impersonations." Arthur answered that one.

"It was Arthur's voice, after a while with the drugs, it was his face too. I hated him but I hated him being Arthur more. I know it wasn't you but I can't just get over all the things you did to me."

"But I didn't do any of it." Arthur cried out the pain. He understood. Jasper even dead had kept his Merlin from him.

"I know." Merlin said cringing from hi shout. He shook with fear.

"Arthur calm down please, this is hard for Merlin. You have to understand…" Arthur couldn't take it anymore.

"Hard for him?! He has his life back. Jasper's taken everything I had. Everything." He turned and ran from the room, he got in his car and drove.

He didn't know were he had planned on going but he had ended up at the apartment he tore inside.

"Arthur! I didn't think you'd be back for a few hours. How's Merlin?" Arthur ignored Gwen on the carpet with Benny and moved quickly through the house to his bedroom. It had been their bedroom but it would never be again. He couldn't force that on him; he couldn't do that to Merlin. He moved to the bedside table and pulled a bottle out the bottom draw. "Arthur?" Gwen looked in to the room to see Arthur empty half the content of the bottle in to his stomach. "Arthur! What are you doing?" He sat on the edge of the bed his shoulders hunched and began to sob.

"He's gone."

"Merlin? Arthur what happened?"

"He's gone." Gwen was shocked, she fled the room and called the hospital but Merlin was fine. The Doc was still there.

"Gwen, is Arthur there?"

"Yes, he's sat in his bedroom drinking, crying and say 'He's gone' a lot"

"Well at least he hasn't done anything drastic."

"Doc this is looking pretty drastic to me. What happened?"

"Merlin wasn't telling me everything, did you notice his distance with Arthur?"

"Yeah, I just assumed they hadn't been able to do anything while he as in hospital and they were feeling awkward. "

"Unfortunately it wasn't that. Jasper his abilities as a mimic to play t being Arthur every time he was cruel to Merlin, I suspect he hoped to turn Merlin against Merlin so he would love him back."

"What do you mean back?"

"Jasper loved Merlin. That's why he hated him being in another relationship so much, that's why he was so determined to claim him. He was desperate for Merlin to feel the same for him and he felt for Merlin. As far as turning him against Arthur, he's succeeded. Merlin can't deal with the real Arthur and the one Jasper created as two separate beings."

"Oh god. Poor Merlin."

"I would think more poor Arthur. He was only just hanging in there before he was found. I just hope this won't finish him."

"What should I do?"

"Just stay there and make sure he doesn't hurt himself or anyone else."

"Where does large amount or drink lie with that?" Arthur was still sipping out the bottle.

"Keep him as sober as you can." The doc hung up and Gwen turned to the task at hand a little afraid.