Thank you all for reviewing, I love hearing what you think about where i'm taking the story! Hope you enjoy this installment!
Disclaimer: I do not own Chuck...only on dvd.
CHAPTER SEVEN:
"Sarah, hey," Elie greeted in her usual sweet yet authoritive voice; the voice she used when talking to patients. A voice that meant business.
"Ellie, I can't really talk right now," Sarah was quick to respond, hoping that she could shutdown any potential conversation, especially with Chuck's sister. All she really wanted was to be alone; that was the way it always had been. Sarah against the world, only now that idea was not something she particuarly saw as desirable.
"Sarah, please, just hear me out."
"Ellie, I'm-"
"You're just about to leave, right?" Ellie guessed...correctly.
Sarah sighed as she placed her bag on the ground. "Maybe."
"Look, I know you probably would love nothing more than to hang-up and leave but I just want to talk. I promise I'll be brief."
Sarah sat cross-legged on her bed, resigned to the fact that Ellie wasn't going to let this go. She might as well let her say all that she had to. "Okay, what's up?"
She heard Ellie breathe in quickly. "What happened tonight?" Brief and to the point.
Sarah pushed hair behind her ear, shaking her head – not that Ellie could see her though. "Nothing," she answered meekly.
"Sarah, come on, I spoke to Chuck and he said that you were gone. What does he mean?"
No point trying to hide it. "I'm leaving Burbank and I don't know when I'll be back."
"But why? I thought things were going well?"
That's the problem, Sarah thought to herself. "I just decided that it'd be best for both of us if I went away for a while; you know, give us some space." Even to her the reason sounded weak. She had to work on that; spies should be good excuse makers, that's in the occupation description.
Ellie wasn't convinced. "Trust me, space is not what you need, Sarah. Look, I know we weren't exactly frequent confidantes but I see you like family and I can't just sit idly by and watch you make the biggest mistake of your life." She was getting slightly fired up on the other end of the phone. Just like a sister would, Sarah noted.
"Ellie, i just don't think it's right for me right now."
"Sarah, I didn't call to convince you to do something else or to get through to you...because I know that Chuck already has. And I know that because you're trying to leave. You like distance and I get it, Sarah, I know all about your life growing up and how you have been running your whole life. But Sarah, that stopped when you came to Burbank; you fell in love with Chuck and everything changed, not just for you but for Chuck as well. He became the man that we all knew he could be – you made him reach his full potential and showed him that a guy like him could do amazing things, and he showed you that you could live the life you had always wanted outside of spying. He showed you what it was like to be loved." She paused for a moment and Sarah felt the weight of emotion on her shoulders as a tear escaped. " And I guess in your situation it's scary, but please hear me when I say that no matter what Chuck loves you and he always will so please don't run away because the Sarah I know wouldn't leave the man she loves so much. She would fight 'til the bitter end for what she wanted."
Her speech hit Sarah hard; everything she said was true yet Sarah still found herself floundering in the same problem. "I'm... scared, Ellie. I do love Chuck and I don't know what to do about it." She heard a quiet sigh of relief on the other end of the line. "You know what to do, just think. It'll all become clear. Please don't leave; you'll regret it for the rest of your life."
Don't leave but fight...sounded more like the name of a country and western song than a piece of life advice but Sarah guessed it worked in this specific case. Leaving seemed easier though. She could just hop on a plane and be on a tropical island within hours living a new life. But she knew that if she did, she'd never stop thinking about Chuck – that was a given. In the relatively short amount of time she had spent with him she had already fell for him and as she started to regain memories, she found herself sinking deeper.
And as her gaze fixated on the objects around her room, she noted the cold, detached atmosphere it had. There wasn't anything in sight that made the place warm or...homely. Essentially, it painted a spy's life perfectly. And Sarah, finally grappling with her feelings, realised that she didn't want to spend her time in a place that held no special value or safe feeling. She dragged herself off the bed and stood at the window looking out over the cascade of lights. Why was she so afraid to give in to her feelings? What was holding her back? She had a man who would literally do anything for her and here she was in her hotel room looking out over the city by herslef contemplating a departure from this world. Why was she so persistent in going through life alone? Sure she was a spy, but Chuck had shown her a world where she could be happy in or out of spying. And she was remembering a lot of that life...a life that she thought she had lost forever but was now easing its way back into her conscious. No, no more hiding! She loved Chuck, and she wanted to be with him – the rest was just details that could be figured out later; it was time she started to take back her life. And in that moment of sheer clarity, Sarah knew exactly what her next step was to be.
Chuck woke early the next morning as the sun blasted its light into his room. Just another signal of life moving on as he lay in his bed, completely broken from the events of the night before. No matter what pep talks his friends and family would undoubtedly give him once he emerged, Chuck wasn't having it. He didn't care what kind of motivational jargon they'd spew his way he just couldn't hear it right now. What he really needed was for everyone to step back and just let him recover at his own speed and in his own time. Fat chance of that happening, though.
He summoned up enough strength to climb out from under his covers and stumble his way into the kitchen where he was greeted by a chirpy Morgan Grimes donning a pale blue apron. "Oh hey, Chuck," Morgan said whisking something in a bowl. "I knew you wouldn't stay in bed forever."
Chuck rubbed his sleepy eyes hoping that Morgan was just a vivid figment of his imagination. "Morgan, what are you doing here?"
"I'm making pancakes," he replied as if it was the most obvious answer in the world.
"Okay, let's try this, Morgan why are you making pancakes in my kitchen?"
Morgan put down the whisk and opened the refrigerator. "Well I figured since Ellie's out of town, I'd assume the role of chief pancake-maker," he remarked pulling out milk and closing the refrigerator door. "Now take a seat."
Chuck did as instructed, not because he was happy about this intrusion but because he was weary from, well, everything. "While I appreciate what you're trying to do, I'm really not in the mood to eat and talk about my feelings."
Morgan looked at him from under his eyelashes. "I know all about Sarah, man; Ellie called me last night at some ungodly hour saying all these things about her being gone or something and so I figured that you'd feel better once you had some of my world famous pancakes." He put a stack on a plate and placed in front of Chuck, nudging it closer and closer until Chuck gave in.
Chuck took a bite. "World famous, huh?"
Morgan scratched the back of his neck. "Well that's what it said on front of the packet anyway."
Chuck managed a laugh as he shovelled another pile into his mouth. "I gotta say, buddy, these are pretty good. Thanks." He gave him a warm appreciative smile.
"Ah, it was nothing. You'd do the same for me." He, too, ate a stack, munching and chewing as if his life depended on it. "So, she's really..." he trailed off, his mouth full.
Chuck put down his fork, leaned back and crossed his arms. "Gone. Yeah." His voice was stoic and heavy.
"I'm sorry, Chuck."
"Yeah, me too." He stared up at the sky trying with all his might not to break down. "I don't know what to do, Morgan," he whispered.
Morgan removed the apron and took a seat next to his best friend. "You'll figure it out. You're Chuck Bartowski, man; everything's gonna be alright."
"I don't know, for the first time in a really long time, I don't think that it is."
Morgan patted pancake mix off his shirt. "You just have to have faith, man."
And as if on cue, Chuck's phone rang and he was not prepared to see the name of the caller. "Morgan, it's Sarah!" he exclaimed, jumping up off the seat with the phone in his hand as if it was a timebomb. "What...what do I do?"
"What do you mean, answer it!"
"Really?"
"If you don't I will!"
"Okay, okay, okay."
Chuck clicked answer. "Sarah?"Morgan moved around to be at his ear so he could hear what she was saying.
"Hi, Chuck." Her voice was so...melodious. It gave Chuck a thrill just to hear it – probably because he never thought he'd hear it again.
"Hey...what's up?" That was all he could muster.
Her voice was apologetic. "I'm sorry about last night," she started, accentuating each word, "I wasn't really thinking, I guess." Chuck waited for her to speak again. "Anyway, I was hoping that we could talk. Meet me at the next place at noon?"
"The next place?"
"Yeah...on our tour?"
"I never told you where that..." Chuck trailed off automatically understanding - Sarah remembered! "You remember?"
There was a smile in her voice. "I'll see you there, Chuck." And she hung up.
Chuck, in total shock, dropped the phone and grabbed Morgan violently in a bear hug. "She remembers!" he yelled.
"That's great, man, but do you think you could give a guy a little air?"
"Oh, sorry!" He put his friend down and collected his phone from the floor. "I gotta get ready!" And like a flash, his despair was replaced with complete bliss. Sarah, his Sarah, remembered. She remembered!
The church was exactly as Sarah had remembered, down to the slightest detail. It's a comforting thing when one walks into a room and instantly feels the connection and the history one has with it and this was no different for Sarah. When she allowed herself to freely think about the memories she had with Chuck and his friends and family, she just knew where to go. This church represented a huge step in her development as, well, a normal person. It was like a form of magic, that something that years previous would have seemed alien to her became something she craved. She craved a normal life with the man she loved. And despite herself, she cursed Quinn – again – for taking this, and every other memory, away from her. She couldn't even remember where this church was, she just knew what it looked like, so she jumped in her car and drove and drove until something ignited inside of her and she ended up outside the building.
She walked up and down each pew that lined the church, running her hand along the mahogany and breathing in the scent of stories past. She watched the sun break through the glass windows, illuminating the altar at which both her and Chuck stood exchanging their vows and making the ultimate commitment of love to one another. She rubbed her hand over her heart as she pictured the scene, tears welling up in her eyes. She recalled the way Chuck looked at her; the way his eyes scanned her with nothing but tenderness and adoration, and the way he spoke with deep emotion as he declared his love. There wasn't a dry eye in the house. Even now as she thought of it, she still felt the same sense of security and affection she did that day. She made her way up the altar, standing in the spot just like she did that day, a broad smile on her face. It was a beautiful moment, and one which she vowed never ever to forget again.
I know some of you thought that Sarah's decision to leave in the last chapter was a bit mean, but I believed that things had to get worse for them to start to get better and I hope it's paying off now.
I think I may make the next chapter the last one...not quite sure yet! I'll need some inspiration ;) Please review because I love to hear your responses and if any of you have any suggestions as to where you would like this story to go please feel free to tell me! I'd love to hear from you!
