Author's Note: I think I'll be updating more than once today so here's the first chapter.

I sat in the waiting room of some stuffy office. Usagi wanted to come with me, but he wasn't allowed. He was also mad that all my sessions with this new therapist were private. I think that was the point. That I could say anything and no one would know about it.

"Misaki Takahashi." Some overly cheerful receptionist walked over. I looked up. "Oh. Well you're younger than I thought. Dr. Hizaki will see you now." I followed her down the hallways. Everything looked the same. It was like a maze. It felt like jail though. The one door that was a bit darker and bigger than the rest was my destination.

I walked into the office. It was a little bright. I sat down in a chair. A girl at a desk was reading something. She must be Dr. Hizaki. She looked up. "Reading your file I thought you'd be in your late twenties. How old are you Misaki?"

"I just turned 20." I traced the lines on my bandages and tried not to look up again. I didn't want to be here at all. I wanted to go home and curl in a ball. I wanted to hide from everything. Hiding was easier than facing your fears. I'd always been afraid of doctors and therapists. Something inside made me scared of them. Maybe because when I was younger I was taken to so many of them after my parents died.

"So, Misaki why are you here?" I finally looked up. Her hair was blonde. It was dyed that way. She had a little too much makeup on, but Dr. Hizaki was pretty. She had her own type of beauty.

"Honestly, it's because of a suggestion. I don't like doctors or therapists. I try to take care of my own problems without involving anyone. I've become a burden to someone I love though…so I agreed to come here and see if anything would help me out."

"Alright. I'll start by asking some questions." I hated questions.

"What happened to your hands?" Not that again. I guess I might as well answer this time.

"That night…I had a nightmare. After I woke up I didn't get back to sleep. I heard Usagi-san's alarm go off. He takes a while to get up so I went downstairs to start breakfast. I almost fell over a couple times. I should've taken that as a sign and went back upstairs to lie down." I played with a bear left on the couch. "I made coffee and got everything out so I could start cooking. I poured the coffee in the wrong glass though. It shattered and fell on the ground. I'm not sure what I was thinking. I went to grab part of the cup that was still all together." I stared out the window for a while.

"I forgot the coffee pot was in my hand and I dropped it. I fell forward though because I was still trying to catch that stupid cup. I fell hands first on all the glass and coffee. I don't remember thinking anything then…but cleaning everything up before Usagi came downstairs. I was thinking straight though because blood scares me a lot." I remember how terrified I was. Mostly that Usagi might get mad.

"Who is Usagi?" I hadn't noticed Dr. Hizaki got up and moved to the chair across from me.

"He's the guy I love. The one I cause so much trouble." Usagi must be growing tired of me.

"Would you like to tell me a bit about him?" I thought therapists were supposed to write things down. She was just sitting here though.

"Usagi-san was my brother's friend for all his life. He helped us out when our parents died although I never met him until I was 18. I wanted to get into M university. I'm not the smartest person though. He offered to tutor me for free."

"Why would he do that?" That's what I thought the first time I went over there.

"Well…Usagi-san was in love with Nii-chan." I wonder if I was supposed to be saying all of this.

"Then how did you two end up together if he liked you brother?"

"Usagi-san is forceful. I'd never thought about being with anyone before I met him. I wasn't exactly content by myself, but I wasn't looking for anyone either. The first day I went over I found out something and that was you should never wake him up." I remember that day so clearly. I always forget things but not when it comes to Usagi. "I don't know what made me stay after that. He interested me I guess. Maybe it was because he said I was cute. I don't know. I never had anyone like me before him."

"Forceful? Does Usagi hurt you?" Hurt me? Not on purpose. Rarely if he does.

"No he'd never do that."

"How much older is he?" I hated thinking about the age difference between us. I couldn't understand certain things he was going through.

"He's ten years older than me." The look on her face told me she was shocked. Disgusted? I wasn't sure. "I'm always concerned about that."

"Did it ever bother you that he liked your brother?" Yes.

"All the time. When I asked about it once, Usagi told me I wasn't a replacement. That he fell in love with me that night when I cried for him. It was when Nii-chan told us he was getting married. I wanted to hurt him then because he couldn't see how much Usagi loved him. I had no feelings for Usagi then. I was just sad. I pitied him I guess." That was the night we first kiss. The night I saw Usagi cry. I was the only one.

"It didn't take me long to fall for him. I wouldn't tell him that though. He'd get all conceited." Then I'd never walk again. Which reminds me, Usagi hadn't tried anything even after we haven't seen each other for three months. You'd think the first night we moved in I'd have to lock myself in the bathroom for protection. Maybe I need to give him some attention.

"Well our time is up today. See you next Tuesday Misaki." I got up and left without saying anything. That was a waste of time and money. Anyone could ask me those questions. Nii-chan and Usagi were waiting in the car. I stopped at the vending machine and bought some drinks. I slid in the backseat of the car.

"How'd it go?" Nii-chan turned at looked at me.

"I stole her bear." I sipped on my juice. Usagi and Nii-chan just stared at me in shock. Nii-chan took the bear and walked back inside.

"Why'd you do that?" Usagi was looking at me and I knew he was trying to stay serious.

"So he'd leave for a while." I leaned forward and kissed Usagi. Just a peck. I saw Nii-chan walking back out of the building where Dr. Hizaki's office was. Literally a minute. I acted like I was handing Usagi a drink and sat back down. I wonder when Nii-chan was going to leave.

Author's Note: Kohaku- D'espairsRay ~Japanese