Chapter 7: Kyonko Causes Trouble
After the birthday party, Haruhi and I had sat down and explained to the twins that Kyonko was going to stay with us forever. She would be their new adopted older sister. Ayu didn't like it, but Katai was thrilled.
Ayu typically played outside with the neighbor kids. Katai preferred to stay inside. She would go to Kyonko's room and ask her to play. They did tea parties with Katai's dollies. And if a dollie got broken she'd ask Kyonko to mend it for her. It seemed almost as if Katai could somehow sense Kyonko's sadness and took it upon herself to try to cheer her up.
Kyonko's depression was starting to rub off on me. I was finding it harder to concentrate at the computer.
I knew that we had to get her mind off things. She had to let go of Haruki. She had to move on with her life.
One day Kyonko came home from school and slammed the front door behind her.
From the kitchen I said, "And how was school today?"
There was silence. I leaned my head through the doorway to look. I saw her and then I realized my mistake. I definitely should not have asked her that question.
I could see the eruption starting. "School is sooo boring. And stupid.."
I recognized that look on her face. I had seen it many times on Haruhi's face just before she exploded into a huge tirade. But I never saw it on Kyonko's face until now.
She threw her book bag down and stomped over to me. "Kyon, what the [bleep] is wrong with the schools in your world?"
Yep, thar she blows.
"Arggh! I mean, teaching evolution to kids? C'mon, who cares about that crap? In my world we learned useful stuff, or stuff that would make us better citizens. You know, economics, civics, the constitution, history. I mean there's not a single decent history course in my school's whole curriculum! You ever heard the saying, 'Those who ignore history are doomed to repeat it'? There's no history course at that school! It's just touched on in Social Studies!
"I mean, why do they teach evolution to kids for crying out loud? It's such a waste of time. I mean, ontogeny recapitulates phylogeny. Who cares?"
I shrugged. "Uh, maybe the educators who write the curriculum think it's important?"
"But why is it important? The curriculum is already so packed, and so much of it seems like wasteful crap."
She was in full melt-down rant mode. I just decided to nod my head and go along with it. Ride out the storm. I was used to it with Haruhi.
She glared at me. "Why waste so much time on freaking evolution? Oh.. wait.. I know now. It's another stupid atheist thing, isn't it? They're clinging to evolution like a life-raft to support their tiny worldview. Oh nooo.. we can't have an observant God now could we? That would be awful. That meant there might be, you know, judgement or something. And we can't possibly have that. Oh nooo... It's stupid!"
I rolled along with it. "Yeah, it's the old creationism versus evolution debate. On the Internet it's pretty much a guaranteed flame-war. They argue about it all the time. I try to avoid it."
"I know, right? It is sooo stupid. Insisting that God created the world in seven literal 24-hour days? I mean, how long is a day to God anyway? What does time even mean at that level? It's such a small-minded interpretation of Genesis. Such small minds.. always trying to put God in a box. They want to take it out on Sunday mornings, sing a few hymns, then put it back in the box and go home. God is so much bigger than that. I've only flipped through the Bible a couple of times but even I know that's not how it works. It's supposed to be a relationship, two-way communication between levels. If they were Christians, I mean real Christians, they should be doing it, I mean that kind of communication, every single day!"
I just kept nodding and waited for her ranting to burn itself out.
"Bah! Atheists are even worse. They don't want to be bothered at all. It's all threatening to them, so they go in denial and cling to evolution like it was a shield or something. C'mon! I mean, all of amazing creation is right there in front of them! It's not random. I mean, sure there's adaptation, life adapts. But there's a method underneath it all somewhere. I'm sure of it. It's too elegant, too beautiful. We did microbiology in class today. Have you ever seen a monarch butterfly's wing under a microscope? Heck, just go outside! See the cherry blossoms falling, the cicadas singing, the sun rising behind Mount Fuji. It's all so wonderful and beautiful. I mean, it's all right there.. it's all right in front of their eyes.. the whole of glorious creation is all right there! Right in front of them! It's all so stupid. Stupid!"
I decided to do something to change the topic. I sat down at the chessboard and reset the pieces. "Hey, let's play another game, ok? Let me play white."
"Kyon, we've played chess, what, at least 30 times? I kicked your keister every time. The last five games I spotted you a rook."
Actually the last game she also spotted me a queen. I didn't say anything.
"Gaah!" She stormed upstairs and slammed the door to her room.
I then noticed that Katai was hiding behind my legs. I picked her up. "It's okay, sweetie. She's just feeling sad." The little girl looked on and said nothing.
That night Haruhi and I discussed the problem in bed. She turned and looked at me. "Kyon, we need to do something."
"Yeah, I know. Her brain is spinning with no input. She needs a distraction."
"That's right, a distraction. Something to keep her mind off things."
"Sure, but what? I can't keep her mentally engaged. It's hopeless."
"Kyon, is there anything that someone else could do? Someone other than us, I mean? Someone who could keep a girl like that occupied? Could keep a sixteen year old girl distracted?" Her eyes suddenly widened. "Aha! I know!"
I had already come to the same realization a few weeks earlier. "Very good dear. I already tried that. Unfortunately she's just not interested in boys right now."
"Pshaw, she's just pining for Haruki and Yuuki - those sketches prove it. The problem is that she is so busy fantasizing about her future husband and her guardian angel that she doesn't look at any other boy. I should know. I was just as lovesick as her once, even younger." That was true. When she twelve years old she became obsessed with finding John Smith. For her there was no one else. She had searched high and low for three years to try to find him.
"Kyon, all we need to do is get past her defenses. Get her involved with someone who won't make her put her guard up."
"Okay."
"And I know exactly who. He's perfect."
Could that be possible? Haruhi was a volunteer at the school and had met several of the students in Kyonko's class. "They are already friends. All we have to do is move things along a little bit faster."
I arched an eyebrow. "Hmm? You're scheming. That always scares me."
"You just don't understand women, Kyon." She grinned evilly.
Yes, definitely scary.
"So who is it, then?"
She described him.
I was incredulous. "You have got to be kidding me."
She grinned even more. "I know. That's why it's perfect."
"Are you serious?"
"It'll work, trust me."
I sighed. I had some real misgivings about it.
She rolled on top of me. "You know, talking about this stuff, it's turning me on."
Growl, talk about distractions. "We gotta be quiet."
"I will."
She wasn't.
And so we decided to put Haruhi's scheme into motion with some personal practice.
Haruhi had signed up as a teacher's aide volunteer at North High. She worked a couple days a week. At the next opportunity I tagged along with her and visited Kyonko's junior classroom, 2-1.
"So where are they?"
Haruhi gestured, "Over there."
I found them. Kyonko was sitting at a round table with three boys and another girl. They were working on some team project.
Two of the boys were seated on each side of Kyonko. The one on her left was a bishonen type, with spiked hair over his gray eyes and a pointed chin. The one on seated on her right was an otaku type, heavyset with black rimmed glasses. The girl was seated next to the bishonen. She was rather pretty with long blue hair that reminded me of Ryoko Asakura. The third boy was small and wore glasses and sat on the far side of the table. He sat apart because he was seated in a wheelchair. He had spiky brown hair and yellow-green eyes behind wireframe glasses. He seemed a bit younger than everyone else.
It took only a few seconds of observation for me to see the relationship dynamics. The otaku had an obvious interest in Kyonko and was trying to make conversation with her. The other girl was sharing a textbook with the bishonen; she was leaning in towards him. The boy in the wheelchair sat by himself watching the two pairs interact.
The otaku said something to Kyonko. She turned and gave him the you-are-an-idiot look and said something back. Then she got up and carried her chair around the table to sit next to the boy in the wheelchair. That boy was smiling. He said something to the otaku that I couldn't hear. Kyonko beamed at him and shifted her chair closer. Then the otaku threw down his pencil in disgust.
Haruhi gave me a bump. I leaned in and whispered, "Yeah, I see it. Good call."
She had told me everything earlier. The small boy's name was Akira Kurosawa; he shared the name of his great-grandfather, the famous film director. Four years ago the boy and his mother were in a horrific automobile accident. Both were ejected from the car. His spine was broken at T12, the base of the thoracic curvature just above the lumbar region. His mother was paralyzed in the cervical curvature at C5. She could move nothing below her neck except for her diaphragm and heartbeat.
Initially I had very serious misgivings about Haruhi's scheme. We needed to cheer Kyonko up, not get her involved with a boy with such a tragic past.
I looked at the round table. Kurosawa said something that seemed to take Kyonko by surprise. She gave a retort. Then they got into an animated debate. Suddenly they both stopped - they each grabbed their respective tablets and started flicking through them furiously. I heard the boy yell, "Got it here! I'm right!" Kyonko leaned over to look at his tablet, then she pushed off his shoulder in mock anger, conceeding defeat.
"Kyon, look. Her defenses are completely down, see? It's developing on its own."
I did see it. She was right.
The boy was 16, same as Kyonko, and a year younger than the other juniors. He had a reputation for being a bit mischievous, though I wondered how much a small boy in a wheelchair could do to wreak havoc. Apparently it was enough for him to be well known to the Vice Principal.
"Let's introduce you, shall we?" Haruhi escorted me over.
Kyonko seemed a bit startled. "Kyon, what are you doing here?"
"I just stopped by to check up on your teacher's aide here." I grinned at Haruhi. "And to see how you're doing."
"Oh, uh, we're fine. I mean I'm fine." She seemed nervous.
She tried to make introductions. "Uhm, Dad, this here is Akira Kurosawa. Kurosawa, this is Mr. Suzumiya, my father."
The boy smiled. "Please pardon me if I don't get up."
"Very nice to meet you. Hmm, your name sounds familiar."
"I get that a lot. You're thinking of my great-grandfather, the famous film director."
"Ah yes, Akira Kurosawa. I really enjoyed his films: Ran, The Seven Samurai, Rashomon. He was a cinematic genius."
"Thank you. Which was your favorite film?"
"It's gotta be Ran. I saw it during a film festival in college seven years ago.
"Really? You were in college then? What age were you?"
Oops, crap. Math again. Uhm, let's see. Carry the 2..
Kyonko smacked him in the shoulder. She then glanced around to make sure the other three kids weren't listening. She leaned in and said, "He already figured out you're not my father. He won't tell anyone."
He grinned. "Sorry sir, just a bit of fun." He looked at Kyonko and decided to make amends. "We keep several film mementos at our home. You and your, uh, daughter should have dinner with us some day."
"Uh, thank you. We should do that sometime."
Yeah, they were two peas in a pod all right.
A few weeks later I got a call from the Vice Principal. He asked to see us regarding an incident with our daughter. He assured us she was not in any danger, however he needed to talk to one of us right away.
Haruhi folded her arms. "Gosh, Kyon. You're raising a delinquent. Who would have thought that of you?"
"Very funny. I'll handle it. Stay here with the twins."
I found Kyonko and Kurosawa in the outer office. Kurosawa's father was there.
Kyonko kicked Kurosawa's wheelchair and hissed at him, "You messed up the time delay!"
"Me? You overdid the pressure!"
"Did not! I kept it under 40 psi! The stupid specs were wrong!"
Hoo boy.
Before I could say anything the secretary buzzed us in to the VP's office.
The Vice Principal said, "Mr. Suzumiya, Mr. Kurosawa, I regret to inform you that your children have caused considerable disruption to this school."
"What happened?"
"All the toilets on the second floor exploded."
I bit my lip. "Really?"
Kyonko spoke up. "Just Mentos and Diet Coke. It should have been harmless. I guess the toilets were a little more fragile than we thought." She shot a dagger at Kurosawa.
The VP said, "Please be quiet. This is not the first time we've had of this kind of behavior with these two. The water damage was considerable this time. This kind of behavior cannot be tolerated."
Kyonko spoke up again. "Sir, I'm to blame for what happened. Not Kurosawa."
The Vice Principal said, "I'm sorry, but I cannot give Kurosawa any leniency in this matter. He is just as guilty as you are. I will not be lenient with him because of his physical condition. I'm afraid I am going to have to suspend both of you."
Afterwards I talked privately with Mr. Kurosawa.
I walked Kyonko home with me. She kicked a rock. "We wouldn't have gotten caught if he didn't flub the time delay."
"No, that's not the point. The VP is right. You shouldn't be doing that kind of crap."
"But it was fun."
"That kind of thing can get out of hand. You need to knock it off."
"Bored."
"Why don't you do something constructive for a change?"
"Like what?"
"Well, you have a week off of school now. Why don't you two do something together outside of school?"
"Such as?"
I acted nonchalant. "I don't know. Anything. Go out on a date or something."
"Huh?"
It was time to push things along. "Yes, young lady. A date."
"We're not like that."
"Actually, I think you are. You just haven't admitted it yet. You spend all your time with him in school. He's all you talk about at dinner."
"Kyon.."
"And you stopped drawing new sketches."
She stumbled and stopped. "So you know.."
"Yes. And what I know is you. You're already moving on, unconsciously. It's time to make it official."
"But.."
"I already talked to Kurosawa's father. He's totally on board."
"Dang it, Kyon. What is this, an arranged marriage? Get out of my life!"
I held her shoulders. "Look, you know me. I'd never force anything on you."
"I know.."
"It's time. I know it. You know it. We both know it."
Then she looked up at me. "Uhm, actually, Akira already asked me out once."
"Oh my. Yare yare. I'm getting the vapors." And she had just called him Akira, not Kurosawa.
"I've never been on one before, a date I mean."
"Please? Just this once?"
"Kyon.."
"Do it for me?"
She sighed. "Ok, fine. I'll do it. Happy now?"
I sobbed theatrically. "My dear little daughter is all grown up!"
She stuck out her tongue at me. "Well, I suppose it's time for me to go shopping then."
"Hmm?"
"Maybe Tsuruya can help me buy a dress or something."
I hugged her. "Yeah. I'm sure Haruhi will have some ideas too." We went home.
Inwardly I was overjoyed. The depression would end. I finally knew she was going to be all right.
What I didn't realize was that my meddling was the worst thing that I could have possibly done.
