"Okay, Murph. You ready for me?" Connor quietly said from behind Murphy, his breath tickling his ear as he spoke. Murphy couldn't help the small shiver that ran up his spine, he tried to suppress it but with Connors mouth that close to his ear, his response was involuntary. "I've been dying to get my hands in your hair."

"Go for it," Murphy quietly responded, eager with anticipation, barely able to sit still. "Just be gentle with me, aye?"

"I make no promises."

Connor picked up the brush from the grass & he began to run it through Murphy's thick dark hair, his fingers carefully untangling any knots he found along the way. Murphy sat as still as he could as Connor worked to tame his wild locks, his only movement the gentle bouncing of his leg up & down as he concentrated on the feel of the fingers in his hair, the gentle way they moved, the way they practically played with his strands before the brush would replace his fingers.

"Ya know...you have the best hair, Murph."

Murphy scowled, what the fuck was Connor talking about? His hair stuck up all the time, it grew too fucking fast & it wasn't blonde, like Connor's. The only thing Murphy liked about his hair was that, right now, Connor's fingers were in it.

Connor looked at his brother's face from over his shoulder, smiling at the scowl he saw. "I know you don't believe me but it's true. The color is this deep, almost auburn shade, and it makes your eyes look so blue, just like the ocean. And you know how much I love the ocean."

Murphy could feel a blush begin, he couldn't believe it...Connor noticed his eyes again.

Connor dropped the brush to the grass, his fingers running through Murphy's hair, massaging his scalp. It was always the same routine with Connor, he'd brush Murph's hair first to get all the tangles out before moving on to a scalp massage. Murphy loved how consistent his twin was, especially when he reaped the benefit.

Connor had amazing fingers, gentle but firm at the same time, his nails lightly scratching Murphy's scalp as they raked through his hair. Murphy swore Connor's fingers lingered in his hair longer than they should have, almost as if he lost himself in what he was doing as much as Murphy was lost himself. Murphy bit his lip...shit, he fucking loved those fingers in his hair, he couldn't get enough of the sensations that Connor was giving him, the warmth he felt in his stomach, the goose bumps that were forming on his skin, the shivers that ran up his spine when Conn's fingers softly grazed the tips of his ears.

"Are those goose bumps I see?" Connor chuckled, his hands pausing at the base of Murphy's neck before he pushed his fingers deep into his hair once again, moving his hands upward, gently pulling Murphy's hair between his fingers.

"Can't help it," Murphy mumbled, becoming slightly self-conscious. What if Connor thought it was weird? Or stupid? Or worse, what if he stopped because of it?

But Connor didn't stop. On the contrary, he intensified what he was doing to his brother, his fingers moving just a bit quicker, firmer, bolder. His nails scratched a bit deeper into his scalp before his fingers ran over Murphy's ears once again, lingering a moment on his earlobes, tickling them. Murphy shivered again in response before Connor's fingers again traveled through his hair, practically stroking it.

"Shit, Murph, your hair's so fucking soft, it's just like silk. I love how it feels."

"You do?"

"Can't you tell?"

"I guess." Murphy shrugged in response, he thought he had just been fooling himself, thinking Connor liked something more than just his eyes. But Connor liked how his hair felt, he said so, maybe Murphy wasn't crazy after all.

"Soft as silk, Murph."

Murphy still thought he had stupid hair, no matter how soft Connor said it was. Stupid & practically uncontrollable. "Big deal, Conn. So it's soft, s'not like it ever looks good though."

Connor shook his head slightly at his twins response, he really didn't understand why Murphy sometimes put himself down. It always bothered Connor when his brother couldn't see himself through his eyes, he couldn't see just how amazing he actually was.

Connor's touch became gentle, soothing, his fingers slowing to a more leisurely pace & Murphy recognized that Connor was almost ready to move on. Murphy always felt a bit melancholy when this happened, knowing that too soon Connor's fingers would leave his hair, and Murphy would be left wanting more. Just like always.

"Your hair looks good, Murph."

"It sticks up, Connor."

"Not all the time."

Murphy again scoffed, "No, just most of the time."

Then Connor's hands were suddenly gone & Murphy sighed loudly without even realizing he did so. Connor heard though, not realizing that Murphy was sighing at the loss of Connor's touch, not at how he thought his hair looked.

Connor picked up the brush & he quickly began to run it through Murphy's hair in long strokes, his hand following the brush & smoothing the dark strands. "I think it's cute the way it sometimes sticks up, especially in the morning. In fact, I like that about your hair, it does whatever the fuck it wants. Kind of like you, Murph."

Murphy shook his head, if he did whatever the fuck he wanted, he'd be doing Connor.

A cold wet spray of water suddenly hit Murphy in the face, followed by the loud cackle of his asshole brother. Before Murphy could recover, a second spritz hit his cheeks, followed by a more subdued laugh.

"Sorry, Murph, the spray bottle got away from me a bit."

Before Murphy could retaliate, Connor began to pump the spray bottle with his finger, now wetting Murphy's hair, water dripping onto his shoulders. Connor dropped the bottle to the ground & picked up the towel, wiping Murphy's shoulders & then his face before picking up the comb & scissors.

"All right now, my dear Murphy. I'm gonna cut your hair and make you so attractive that all the girls will go crazy for you. They'll probably even push me aside just to get to you."

"Pretty sure that won't happen, Connor." He smirked at his own private joke, he was more than sure that wouldn't happen, girls just didn't seem to like him much. It's almost like they could tell he was different, like they knew instinctively that he wasn't interested, maybe even on some level they somehow knew he liked boys. Well...at least one boy in particular.

Connor had moved to stand in front of Murphy, reaching forward to comb his wet hair to the side out of his eyes. "With those eyes of yours Murph, combined with this great haircut you're getting, you can't lose. Trust me, any girl you want will be putty in your hands."

That was just it, though. Murphy didn't want a girl, not a single one. He knew who he wanted, he was looking right at him this very second. Murphy didn't respond to Connor's comment, he couldn't, he was too busy thinking of putty in the form of Connor...in his hands.

"Earth to Murph, come in Murph," Connor had begun to snip at Murphy's hair carefully in small amounts, not taking too much off at first, trying to keep it even. "You're thinking of someone special, aren't ya?"

Murphy looked carefully at his brother, watching him for any sign of realization, but Connor's eyes were now on his task at hand, snipping away with the scissors, carefully working around his ear.

"Maybe," Murphy said quietly, not saying what he really wanted to say, 'Yes, I'm thinking of someone special. It's you, Connor. Always you.'

"Charlotte, right?"

"Who?"

Connor straightened up & cocked his head, now looking directly at his brother. "Don't jerk me around, Murph. I know her name is Charlotte."

Murphy's mind was still preoccupied with impure thoughts of his brother & when he was thinking of Connor, his mind didn't seem to work at all. Murphy struggled to put the pieces together. Charlotte...from the movies...the girl who had been so nice to him. Oh yeah, Charlotte. Then Murphy chuckled, Connor thought he was thinking of Charlotte? Not even close...not unless Connor changed his name to Charlotte, that is.

"What's so fucking funny?"

"Nothin', Connor. Just forget it."

Connor moved to the back of his brother, working to trim the back and top of his hair, scissors moving in tandem with the comb that he was now running through his hair. Connor paused to rewet his twins hair, spritzing it just enough to continue, before the snipping began once again, Connor again trimming around Murphy's ears.

"I don't see why you're all embarrassed, Murph. Charlotte is a pretty girl and I'm telling you, the way she was staring at you, she'd go out with you in a heartbeat."

"Maybe I don't want to go out with her, didja ever think of that?"

"Why the fuck not?"

Murphy shrugged, what could he say that would explain to Connor without giving away too much? "She's just not my type, that's all." Lame answer, but one that Murphy hoped Connor would accept.

But of course, Connor didn't buy it. "Not your type? She's pretty, she's breathing and she has the hots for you. That makes her your type, Murph."

"I just don't like her like that. She's nice and all, but like I said, she's just not my type."

There was a pause before Connor quietly asked, "So who's your type, then?"

Murphy shrugged, he knew Connor would continue to press him on this, he always pushed when he felt Murphy was holding back. And Murphy was holding back big time. He had to.

"Come on, Murph, tell me. What do you like?"

He bit his tongue so he wouldn't say 'I like you.' It was right there on the tip of his tongue, ready to be said. He wanted to say it so badly but instead he mumbled, "I like blondes."

Connor chuckled, starting to become amused by the situation, Murphy was turning redder by the minute. "Blondes, huh? What else?"

"Blue eyes."

"I see. So...blonde hair, blue eyes...go on."

Murphy shrugged, knowing Connor wouldn't stop until he got more information. Connor could be like a dog with a bone, he wouldn't let it go until he was done. And he wasn't done. Murphy was trapped, Connor hadn't finished with his hair yet, Murphy couldn't just get up & leave...he'd have to say more.

Murphy thought of Connor and the millions of things he found attractive in his brother. He could list them all, he knew them by heart, they were burned in his memory. But he also knew he had to be vague, he couldn't let Connor know who he was thinking about. "I guess I like a nice mouth."

"You guess?"

Murphy sighed, "Fine...I like a nice mouth."

"Me too. I like soft lips, makes me want to kiss them."

Murphy nodded, hoping the conversation would move to something else, anything else. He needed to stop thinking of Connor and his mouth. And kissing that mouth. This conversation was getting far too dangerous.

But Connor wasn't done yet. "Let's see what we have so far. Blonde hair, blue eyes, a sexy mouth. Sounds pretty good so far. Do you like them short or tall?"

"Tall."

Connor laughed, "You want to climb a sexy tall blonde, don't cha?"

Murphy didn't answer, Connor had hit the nail on the head but Murphy didn't dare respond. Connor gently patted his shoulder, his touch so soft that Murphy barely felt it. "Don't be embarrassed, Murph. I never saw you with anyone before & I guess I'm just curious about what you like. I'd really like to hear more."

There was a silence as Connor waited for his brother to open up further. He really was curious about what Murphy found attractive, what got his motor running, he really did want to know. And ever since Murphy had discovered his love for Connor, Murphy had wanted to tell him about all the things that he found amazing in his twin but had never dared to utter out loud.

Connor opened his mouth to push a little further but before the words could leave his lips, Murphy blurted out, "I like someone who can make me laugh, someone who's funny, you know? Someone who's nice and really super smart, not like Einstein or anything, but just smart. A smile that's meant for only me, and eyes that look at me in a way that makes me melt."

Connor thought Murphy was done & he was about to comment but then Murphy quietly added, "Listening is important. And so is touching...I like to be touched. I like someone that cooks for me too, I think that's romantic. And I like someone that can just have fun & not give a shit what other people think."

Then Murphy suddenly fell silent, afraid he'd said too much, he hadn't meant to say much of anything at all but once he started talking about Connor, he couldn't stop.

"Hmmmm...Sounds like you're talking about someone in particular."

Murphy almost shit himself. If he admitted he had someone specific in mind, Connor wouldn't let up until he knew who. And Murphy certainly couldn't tell him the truth. So he lied. "No, not really. You asked what I liked and I told you."

"Aye. That you did."

"So you see? Charlotte's not my type."

"I guess not but she'd be a fine way to spend your time until that tall, blue-eyed blonde shows up to cook you a romantic meal, don't cha think?"

Murphy shrugged in relief, it sounded like Connor was dropping the subject. For now, at least.

Connor was quiet as he continued to work on Murphy's hair & Murphy could practically feel him pondering the situation, evaluating it in the way only Connor's mind worked. Murphy didn't think he'd figure it out, he couldn't, Murphy had been too careful. No, Connor had no idea who he'd been describing.

Connor had finished the back of Murphy's hair & moved again to stand in front of him, pausing to inspect his twin. "It's still too long."

"You sure? It feels a lot shorter to me."

Connor knelt in front of Murphy for the second time that day, causing Murphy to shift in his seat, what the fuck was Connor doing?

He looked so comfortable on his knees, like he belonged like that in front of Murphy. Connor tapped his finger on Murphy's knee, "Spread your legs for me."

Murphy froze. Those five words staggered him, he never, ever expected to hear Connor say that to him, not in a million years. For a split second, it crossed Murphy's mind that Connor said that because he had figured out who Murphy was talking about and he wanted him. Murphy couldn't move, his eyes full of longing that he couldn't hide, so instead he looked away, he couldn't let Connor see the desire that burned in his soul.

Murphy felt another gentle tap on his knee, "Open your legs, Murph."

Shit, fucking shit, he said it again. But still, Murphy couldn't move.

Connor's hands were on his knees, pushing his thighs open gently but firmly, and Murphy didn't fight him, he let it happen. Then Connor's hands were under his knees, lifting his legs & opening them wider before placing his feet back on the grass in the gentle way Connor had. Connor scooted between Murphy's thighs, leaning forward & resting his elbows on Murphy's thighs, gazing up at him. All Murphy wanted to do was wrap his legs around Connor, he was right fucking there, it would be so easy. Maybe Connor wanted that, maybe that's why he was kneeling between his legs, maybe that's what he had in mind when he told Murphy to spread his legs.

Murphy was too scared to do what his heart told him to do. What if he was wrong? Again? What if he completely misunderstood the situation? Maybe Connor was just playing around like before, trying to have fun, teasing. Murphy couldn't make a move unless he was sure that's what Connor wanted. And he wasn't sure, not at all. So instead, he sat completely still, completely unmoving, practically comatose while he waited to see what Connor did next.

Murphy could see out of the corner of his eye that Connor was staring at him and Murphy held his breath when Connor lifted his hand toward Murphy's face. But instead of him stroking his cheek, or maybe his mouth, Connor pulled at the sides of Murphy's hair.

"Told you...still too long, Murph. I need to take a little more off, okay?"

Murphy nodded in response, his voice soft & barely heard over the chirping birds in the tree above them. "O-okay."

"Unless you don't want me to."

"No, s'fine, Connor. Whatever you say."

Connor remained between Murphy's thighs & he ran the comb through his still wet hair, the scissors snipping softly as he cut more of the dark locks. Connor leaned forward, his body pressing between his thighs as he reached higher to cut Murphy's bangs but Murphy didn't dare look at him, he kept his eyes averted. Murphy could feel Connor's hot breath on his bare chest, warming the areas which were cold from his dripping hair & he fought the urge to close his eyes.

Murphy felt weak, like he'd just run a marathon, and his legs were actually shaking even though he'd been sitting for awhile. He guessed that's what lust did to a person, made them feel weak and shaky, needy and pathetic. But there was more to this situation than plain lust and Murphy knew it deep in his heart. There was love. Murphy was in love with Connor.

Murphy finally looked at his brother, smiling at the crease in his forehead, he loved that crease, he loved the way it deepened when he was concentrating on something. Connor was so close & Murphy was tempted to kiss him, just to see what Connor would do. But he knew better. As much as he liked to pretend that Connor would kiss him back, he was certain Connor would push him away. So he did nothing.

Maybe he should stop pretending...stop pretending Connor wanted him but was too afraid to act on it. Stop pretending Connor dreamt of loving him in the same way Murphy dreamt about Connor. Stop pretending that one day Connor would tell him he was in love with him, take him in his arms and kiss him until he couldn't think straight. Stop pretending period.

As Connor brushed the loose hair from his chest & thighs, Murphy knew he couldn't stop pretending. Not with being this close to Connor every day and not with being so desperately in love with him.

Pretending was all he had.