Chapter Six

They were embracing; Xyla squeezed Merlin tightly. Don't let go, she was thinking. Don't ever let me go; I've never been so safe, so strong. She felt his warmth, his love… He hugged her back…

The moment was pure, innocent, but it couldn't last. All good things faded… or, in this case, were yanked away forcefully.

All good things left Xyla.

She wasn't sure how long it was before it began; suddenly hugging Merlin felt wrong. Suddenly she was sick, her mind on fire. She felt horror… horror without a reason…

Merlin pushed her away, his face hard, and he grabbed her by the wrists. Angrily, he lifted her hands into view; she gasped.

Red. Red like angry Merlin; red like vengeance; red like blood.

Blood.

"Oh," she whimpered, staring at her hands which had only seconds ago been on Merlin's back. But there were no bloodstains on Merlin; of course not. She couldn't rub off on someone like that, someone so much better than she.

Merlin, surely, had never taken such drastic revenge, not in cold blood.

His eyes weren't sad, but horrified. He hated her now; she felt that.

"Merlin!" she cried. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I was trying… I had to…"

She reached for him again, but faltered and became still when he did not try to hug her again. He backed away, slowly, disgust filling his face.

"Don't touch me," he said, tone clipped.

"I didn't kill Arthur, Merlin! I didn't do that! I just took my revenge, and wasn't it mine to take? Merlin! Don't look at me like that!" she said tearfully, both furious and ashamed. Wasn't it her right to be angry at Uther? Did Merlin think her family should die and not be avenged?

"Murderess," he said. "Don't touch me, murderess."

Murderess. She was a murderess. Murderess.

Xyla sat straight up in bed. She couldn't believe her eyes were dry, that she wasn't crying. But she couldn't cry; she'd made up her mind; she would kill Uther. The dreams were to be expected, and she knew they would probably haunt her for years.

Might as well get used to it, she thought sadly, as she rolled over in bed. It was still dark outside, she noticed, staring at the window through unnaturally dry eyes.

She wanted to go back to sleep, but she couldn't do it at once. She had a terrible fear, turning her stomach…What if she had that dream again? What if she had to watch Merlin reject her one more time? She couldn't handle that…

Get used to it, she thought. This is your choice. The only way to fix things is to kill Uther. It's your own fault if you went and fell in love with someone pure and sweet.

Your own stinking fault.

He called me a murderess.

Suddenly she felt ill; her head spun and her stomach lurched. I'm going to be sick, she knew, rolling off the bed and onto her knees on the floor. She cupped her hands around her mouth, laboriously forcing her lungs to drag in air through the cracks between her fingers, slowing down her frantic breathing.

For a moment she froze that way, hoping she wouldn't throw up in Merlin's room. Slowly the need to vomit died down, and she felt herself calm. Tentatively, she moved her hands from her sweating face and leaned back against the bed, forcing herself to breathe steadily.

This is ridiculous. He's just a boy. Why do I care so much? Why does the thought of his displeasure make me feel like my insides are being wrung?

And Someone said love was wonderful. Ha.

Break

Merlin felt like singing when he woke, but it took him a while to remember why. He stared up at the ceiling, utterly bewildered.

Where am I? Why aren't I home? Why am I so happy?

Then it hit him in a series of flashes: Xyla's laughter, the smell of pine, the sudden feeling of lightheadedness as she leaned closer and closer… and then Arthur and the prince's kind offer.

A goofy grin split his face. Some how he knew it in his bones: today was going to be a wonderful, amazing, incredible day. His face beginning to hurt from his huge smile, Merlin jumped happily out of bed. He couldn't help himself; he began to hum, a tuneless, joyful little song.

Merlin's eyes were droopy, he was hungry, his clothes were wrinkled, and he was headed for another long, chore-filled day. But what did he care about silly little things like that?

He was in love, poor boy.

Break

Arthur moaned as the darkness lifted and his mind began to whirl again.

What? Someone in my rooms. Only one. A little to my right.

His hand snaked out, grasping a goblet that sat on his bedside table, and, without ever looking, he threw it.

"Ow!" hollered an indignant voice.

Rolling over and not opening his eyes, Arthur said, "Merlin. You're on time."

"It's incredible," said the manservant sarcastically. "Is that why you threw that at me? If so I might never be on time again."

"Nah," said the prince flippantly. "I just felt like it."

Not sure just how to respond to that, Merlin remained silent for a moment. At last he said, "Okay then. Well, it's time to get up."

"Fine," muttered the prince, at last sitting up in his bed. He stretched, his muscles tightening, and scratched thoughtlessly at his chest. "I'm up," he said, standing and making his way over to the fire. He smiled sleepily; the fire felt good against his bare skin.

"Ready for breakfast?" asked Merlin pleasantly, setting the tray in front of Prince Arthur.

"Yes," said Arthur, opening his eyes. He reached for the piece of bacon on the tray, and stopped as Merlin began to hum.

He gave his manservant a suspicious look.

"Why are you humming?" he asked.

Merlin smiled at him. "It's a nice day," he told Arthur. "It's a great day. And I'm going to leave for about an hour pretty soon."

"Why?" inquired the Prince, a little surprised at Merlin's assured tone of voice. He just was going to announce that he would be gone for an hour, was he? Not asking permission or anything… just stating it as a fact.

"Gaius really needs me help gathering a few things… but, like I said, it won't be very long. I'll be back in time to clean your armor and clean your room and…"

"Do some laundry."

"That, too. I'm assuming you can get dressed by yourself?"

Arthur glared. "Of course I can."

"Really? I'm so proud. You're growing up. I'll get the tray when I come back."

And Merlin ducked out, smiling, and avoiding the pillow that Arthur threw at him.

Break

"Merlin, what exactly do you need my help with?" asked Gwen as Merlin pulled her along by her wrist.

"If you could just let my friend stay with you for a few days… I'll find somewhere else pretty soon, I promise."

"Who is this?" said Gwen, hoping inwardly that she would not be called upon to host another would-be knight or incognito prince.

"A friend of mine," he said, reaching Gaius's chambers. "You'll like her."

"Her?" A girl, then?

"Yeah… Gaius?" called Merlin, sticking his head into the rooms. "Are you here? Obviously not. Come on in, then, Gwen. Xyla?"

Xyla heard him and appeared in the doorway to Merlin's room. Her brown hair was around her shoulders, because she had just shaken it out of her braid. She'd been up for hours, and felt almost chipper, much better than last night. She smiled when she saw Merlin, but nearly scowled when she saw him holding Gwen by the hand.

"No, Gwen," she could almost hear her voice saying. "He's mine. I call him. Mine."

Trying to cover up, she plastered a great big smile on her face. "Merlin!" she called happily, running forward and kissing him quickly on the lips, claiming him for Gwen to see. Merlin blushed. "Thank you so much," she gushed, "for giving me your room. Wherever did you sleep?"

"See?" her hostile glance at Gwen said clearly, "He gave up his room for me. What does it matter if he's holding your hand?"

Gwen, being a woman, read the glance and the kiss swiftly. She extracted her hand from Merlin's grasp kindly.

"Uh…" Merlin was muttering. "Somewhere… oh, this is Gwen. Gwen, Xyla."

Gwen nodded at Xyla, smiling. "Hello, Xyla." Gwen recognized the girl easily, but she didn't say anything.

"Hello, Gwen. It's great to meet you," said Xyla, trying not to simper, hoping she came across as earnest. After all, Gwen had let go of Merlin's hand. Maybe she wasn't interested.

Gwen gave Xyla a sharp look, then let her glance slide to Merlin. "So you two are…?"

Xyla smiled proudly, her hand absentmindledly and possessively stroking Merlin's arm. "Yes."

Gwen's raised eyebrow asked another question, or perhaps many questions. "Do you love him? Are you serious?"

The way Xyla's eyelids flickered and her lips turned up at the corners let Gwen know she was for real.

Gwen nodded her approval, and the non-vocal conversation came to a satisfactory end.

Merlin, being a man, and completely unaware of the unspoken words that had just passed between the two women, continued, "Gwen, I was wondering if you could perhaps let Xyla stay at her place for just a couple of nights. I'd put her up here, but between Gaius and me, there isn't any room."

"I don't mind staying on the floor," said Xyla, and this time, she sounded earnest. Too bad she wasn't.

"Sure she can stay," said Gwen. "I've got room."

"Thanks," said Xyla, smiling dazzlingly. "I appreciate it."

Gwen patted the girl's arm, their friendship cemented by their silent discussion of a few minutes ago. "Don't think a thing of it," she said. "And Merlin? Didn't you tell Arthur you wouldn't be gone long?"

Merlin nodded. "I did, and he left me a huge list of chores to do. I have to run. Xyla, Gaius usually leaves breakfast for me over there if he has to leave before I get up. Take some."

"What about you?" she asked, her hand unconsciously touching his sleeve. She liked how she could feel the warmth of his skin through his shirt.

"I ate some of Arthur's breakfast," he assured her. "And I'm sure he noticed and will want my hide, so I'd better go."

Intoxicated from that last gentle touch of her hand, he nearly swaggered from the room. Gwen, grinning, followed.

A/N: Another chapter done. Next week I believe I'll get into the whole murder-attempt scene. Thanks ILoveThesePeople and Naisa, my regular reviewers.