This one's short, sorry about that! The latest chapters I've written for both my fanfics have been short. Anyways, I just finished writing this one, as in I finished it and jumped online, so it might be kind of sloppy. If so, sorry about that, but I wanted to get it up! I'll write the next chapter soon, but I can't promise when. It might be short too though.
Enjoy! (It would be weird if I said 'Hate it!' instead, wouldn't it?)
The next day the atmosphere in the car was tense.
Young Link was angry at Pichu for publishing a drama romance Link/Young Link fanfiction. Pichu was angry at Link for hacking onto her account and deleting said fanfiction. Link was angry at Marth for existing. Marth (perhaps the only one with a legitimate case) was angry at Zelda for knocking him out the day before. And Zelda was angry at everyone because it was indeed that time of the month.
Roy was the only one who was moderately close to being happy, and so he sat in shot-gun, next to Link, not talking to anybody.
It was quiet for a long, long time as Link drove steadily down the freeway. In the end it was Young Link- may he rest in peace- that broke the silence, shaking his DS with a deep frown, "The battery died."
Young Link glanced at Pichu, who was on the dashboard continuing the lego master piece she had up till this point shirked. Normally, Pichu would charge his DS for him, being an electric pokemon. But Young Link was still too upset over what he'd found on Pichu's laptop to ask for her help.
So instead Young Link took out the battery pack and tried to charge it using the tension in the air. When that promptly failed, Young Link turned to Zelda.
"Hey Zelda, can you charge this?"
Zelda scowled darkly at the boy, "Why the hell are you asking me?"
"Because you can zap people with electric stuff." Young Link replied, "So you're kind of like a charger."
Because of Zelda's current state, she was even more temperamental than normal. Up till this point, her anger had been focussed on every living thing but, by speaking and- what's more- addressing her directly, Young Link had drawn attention to himself.
"You little brat!" Zelda shrieked, "I'm going to kill you!"
"Oh, lay off the kid, Zelda." Marth snapped, staring moodily out his window, "Why don't you put that tampon to better use and shove it down your throat instead."
If Marth had been a woman, this too would have been his time of the month.
"You prick!" Zelda screeched, focus entirely on Marth now, "I'll burn you to a crisp for that!"
During the exchange, Young Link was torn between appreciating his idol for saving him, cowering from Zelda the she-beast and puzzling over what 'tampon' and 'prick' meant.
Marth slid his eyes towards Zelda, narrowing them as he smiled maliciously, "You like burning people, don't you? You know pyromania's a sign of sexual tension."
This time, Zelda portrayed her fury in actions instead of words. Reaching for the nearest heavy object, Zelda swung what appeared to be a roll of parchment at Marth, only to miss in her blind rage and hit Young Link instead.
The boy collapsed, but nobody cared. Zelda raised the weapon to try and hit Marth again, only for the knight to frown and say, "Isn't that the map Peach gave us?"
Stopping mid-swing, Zelda lowered her arm and examined the object. It was indeed the rolled up map.
"What's this doing back here..." Zelda murmured. Suddenly, something occured to her and her eyes slid up to rest on the back of Link's head, "Hey Link..."
"Yes, my love?" Link asked, turning around in his sead.
"I have a question..."
"Ask away, my love. Whatever you desire to hear, just tell me and I shall answer!"
Zelda held up the map, "Have you been using this?"
Link, still smiling, replied: "No!"
Now what happened next may sound impossible, but anything can be done when the Princess of Hyrule (who just happens to be on her period) is seriously pissed off.
Somehow, Zelda managed to kick Link in the face. Even though they were in a small, crowded car, Zelda shot her leg up in a very swift, precise kick and nailed Link with the flat of her toe and the edge of her heel.
Everyone in the car froze, watching as Link slithered down in his seat and Zelda slowly drew back her leg.
"Get up." Zelda growled at Link, face hidden by her hair.
Hurrying to oblige, Link righted himself and gripped the wheel, his hands shaking so badly this simple task was nearly impossible.
"Now drive." Zelda hissed, "And keep driving until we reach the next gas station."
Link swallowed and stepped on the gas, "M-may I ask why, my princess?"
"Of course." Zelda replied, pushing her hair from her face to reveal a far too cheery smile, "I need to buy some lemon juice and a stake knife."
Another chapter down, and I'm finally getting around to the point of this story. (Actually, there isn't a point, I just wanted to put them in a car and see what I could write, but let's pretend I knew where this was going all along, ok?) I'll update as soon as possible!
