Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach


Renji

Ichigo passed a bottle of beer to Renji, and a bottle to Ikkaku, who had both made themselves comfortable on his sofa. At least they hadn't taken his reclining chair Ichigo thought as he sat down in favourite seat and popped the cap off of his bottle. It had been an unpleasant surprise for Ichigo when the two of them had shown up at his apartment earlier this evening.

"Aaaah. That hits the spot." Ikkaku said.

"Yeah, and maybe it'll get that stupid look off of Ichigo's face."

"Stupid look? What the hell Renji?!"

"That scowl that you've been wearing since we've gotten here. You'd think that you'd be happy that Rukia will be gone for the weekend and you get the house to yourself for a while. I mean Rukia is great, but women, you need a break from them every once in a while."

"Or you can just not bother with them at all." Ikkaku put in.

"Yes, well the only problem is I don't get the house to myself do I? I have two unwanted house guests, and I would prefer Rukia over you guys any day, even when she is nagging me." Ichigo said glaring at his two unwanted house guests.

"That hurts Ichigo. Hurts me right here." Renji said, pointing to his heart.

"Well it's you own fault that we're here. If it hadn't been for the incident last time Rukia went back to Soul Society we wouldn't have to be here babysitting you. Mind you this isn't so bad, the beer's pretty good." commented Ikkaku.

"That incident wasn't even my fault!" Ichigo protested.

"Sure, it wasn't." said Renji.

"Hey do you have any chips?" Ikkaku asked.

"Or those curly salted things?" Renji added.

"You mean pretzels?" Ichigo asked.

"Yeah, those are the ones."

"We have some chips and pretzels in the cupboard, I'll go get them."

Ichigo reluctantly got up from his comfy chair to go and get the chips and pretzels from the cupboard. Stupid lazy freeloaders. Renji and Ikkaku were probably going to sit on his coach all weekend eating all of his food and making a mess of the place.

When Ichigo came back with the snacks he found that Renji had made himself even more comfortable, and now had his feet propped up on the coffee table.

"Oi Renji, can you get your freaking feet off of the table?"

"Calm down Ichigo. Rukia isn't here, remember? We can sit back and relax."

"What does Rukia have to do with this? I don't want your dirty feet on the table because it's unsanitary. You know some people eat off of there. And would you mind putting your beer on a coaster, they are on the table for a reason."

Renji gave Ikkaku a look before removing his feet from the coffee table and moving his beer so it was now sitting on a coaster

"And I suppose you would be angry to know then that I drank some milk straight from the carton?"

"You WHAT?"

Renji chuckled "Don't get your panties in a twist Ichigo, I didn't really do that. Man, Rukia has got you whipped."

"What! I'm not whipped. I'm just not a slob like you guys." Ichigo protested, even though the reason he had stopped drinking straight from the milk carton had been Rukia's incessant nagging.

"I'd have to agree with Renji my friend –" Ikakku began before Ichigo interrupted him.

"Oh crap! I forgot to feed Renji!" Ichigo exclaimed with a look of horror on his face, before dashing off upstairs.

"What's he doing? I'm right here." Renji said to Ikakku in confusion.

"Yes, and he already has provided us with food." Ikkaku said, equally as confused.


Renji and Ikkaku watched as 'Renji' the red Siamese fighting fish swam around his tank.

"So Renji is Rukia's fish?"

"I guess so."

"And he says he isn't whipped!" Renji said chuckling once again.

"Yeah, I'd have to agree with you on that one. Man is he ever whipped."

"It's kind of cool though that Rukia named her fish after me."

"You know" Ikkaku said as he rubbed his chin as if he was in deep thought, "I can kind of see a resemblance between you and him."

"WHAT?!"


A/N: I don't know if it's just me, but Renji's hair has always reminded me of the fins of a Siamese fighting fish. If you don't know what a Siamese fighting fish looks like, just google it (look at the red ones). Anybody else see the resemblance? Anybody? I don't know, maybe it's just me.

In case you were wondering about "the incident" that occured the last time Rukia went to Soul Society that I refrenced in this story, I don't know what it "the incident" is yet, but when I figure it out I'll write a chapter about it. And as always feel free to leave a review.