Lyrics from Missy Higgens
Some characters borrowed some my own
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"What have we got?" Paula asked the first paramedic through the door.
"Three car pile up. This girl here was in the middle car. We got her stable, but she's been unconscious since the cops arrived on scene forty five minutes ago."
"Why so long?"
"Had to cut her out, and there was multiple injuries but she's the worst. Luckily no fatalities."
"Well thank God for small favors. Get her to trauma one."
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Three hours later Taylor was out of surgery. There was internal bleeding that needed to be stopped. She also had multiple fractures and lots of bruising. They wouldn't know the extent of any head injuries until she regained consciousness.
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"Paula, I've been looking all over for you. Follow me." Sandy, one of the other nurses said.
"I'm too wiped to protest. We just sent a girl to surgery who was about the same age as Sp…" She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw her daughter on a bed with an obvious gash on her forehead and other small scraps.
"Hey Mom."
"Spencer!! What happened, are you ok?"
"I think so. We were driving home then we were in an accident."
"Are Kris and Sarah ok?"
"I think they are. I haven't seen them since we left the car."
"Sandy will you give us a minute alone with my daughter. I'll close up the cut."
"No problem Paula."
"Spencer were you girls drinking?"
"A little. But Sarah was fine and she was driving. It just all happened so fast. Was anyone hurt badly?"
"Yeah. A girl about your age. Not sure yet about how serious. Otherwise everyone else had minor injuries from what I've heard."
"Oh my God."
"Look don't worry about them at the moment let's just deal with this cut right now."
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Ashley sped the whole way to the hospital once she got the call. Inside at the nurses station she saw a familiar face. "Paula."
"Ashley I'm so glad Spencer called you. She should be ready to leave in about twenty minutes."
"Spencer is here too?"
"Yeah isn't that why you're here?"
"No, one of the guys from the band called and said Taylor was in an accident. Said it was bad."
"Oh…" Paula said not sure what else to say. She didn't want to be the bearer of bad news about her band mate but she wanted Ashley's concern to be for Spencer at the same time.
"Why is Spencer here? What happened? Is she ok?"
"Ash let's go sit down." She lead Ashley into the nurses lounge.
"What's going on Paula? You're kinda freakin me out."
"Ash, Spence was in the same accident as your friend Taylor. She's fine cause Sarah was driving. They may be in a little trouble because they were drinking. I don't know about Taylor or the other driver."
"Wow. Well I know Taylor was sober. Who was the other driver?"
"We don't know. They never came here."
"Alright. How's Taylor?"
"We don't know Ash."
"Paula I know I'm not family but please can't you tell me anything?"
"I'm not holding back Ash. I'd tell you if I knew more. We won't know for sure until she wakes up."
"I know I'm just a little overwhelmed. Can you go see if Spencer wants to see me? I'd kinda like to see that she is ok with my own eyes."
"Yeah, come walk with me Ash." Paula said as she put her arm around Ashley's shoulders.
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"Hey Spence. How you feeling?"
"Ok except for the splitting headache. How are you guys?"
"Good to go." Sarah said. "So when can we break out of here."
Just then the doctor walked in and said, "You are all set Spencer. Do you want me to get your Mom?"
"No I'll see her in the morning. Alright girls lets get out of here."
The girls walked out without seeing Paula or Ashlee. After five minutes they got a cab and headed home for a lot of much needed rest.
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"Sorry Ash. Guess she really didn't want to be here."
"No worries Paula. I wouldn't want to be here if I didn't have to be either. I guess I'll catch up with her later. Do you know where Taylor's family is?"
"Yeah. I'll take you up there dear. I was going to check in on her progress soon anyways."
When Ashley walked into the waiting room she saw the guys. She went and sat by them and asked, "any news yet?"
"No," Ryan sadly said. "She still hasn't woken up yet. But the docs seem hopeful."
"Does her family know? Shouldn't they be here?"
"Yeah her brother was the one who called me." Ryan said. "Tony and Nessa took the kids to get some food. They should be back soon."
All of a sudden Jay came bursting in the room and ran to Ash. "Ashley." he exclaimed and hugged her legs. "Tyty is hurt kinda bad."
"I know kido but she's tough. She'll be ok."
Jay seemed happy with the answer and ran over to a couch where his Mom had sat down with his baby sister.
"Hi. I don't think we've met. I'm Tay's brother Tony. You must be the wonderful new singer I've heard so much about."
"Yeah, I'm Ashley, it's nice to meet you too. I just wish it was under better circumstances."
"True. Didn't know you were such buds with my boy."
"Neither did I. That's definitely news to me. The one time I kinda met him he was playing Guitar Hero. I didn't even think he saw me much less knew my name."
"Yeah he's like that. He sees you once, especially if you are a friend of Tay's, and you're a friend for life."
"He's a sweet kid. How are you guys holding up?"
"As well as can be expected. Jay doesn't understand why she doesn't just wake up. Hell I think all of us are kinda thinking that. But I will be a hell of a lot better when she opens her eyes."
"Well the little I know about her she's tough so I have no doubt she'll be awake and bitching when she's good and ready."
"From your lips to that stubborn girls ears. But I must admit very well said." The baby started to cry. "Well I'm gonna go be a helpful daddy and husband. Thank you for coming."
Ash sat back down hoping that Taylor would hurry up and prove her right.
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When Paula got home from work Spencer was alone sitting at the kitchen table.
"Hey Mom how was the rest of your shift?"
"Slow thankfully. Why did you leave so suddenly? You know Ashley showed up at the hospital shortly after I left your room."
"Was she ok? Was she involved in the accident?" Spencer asked frantically.
"No hon. But I'm glad you seem to care. From what I've heard you haven't seen much of her since you've been home."
"Mom please don't start with me. Things are just way to complicated."
"Are they really? Seems to me you just don't want to tell Ashley the whole truth."
"That's not it at all. I do want to tell her. I just don't know how to without hurting her."
"Well I guess you'll have to figure that out. But don't completely cut her out honey. I think she'll understand more than you think. Don't sell her short."
"Maybe. But how can I expect her to understand something that I don't completely understand to begin with. So why was she at the hospital? Did you call her?"
"No actually the girl who was severely injured was from her new band."
"Oh my God Taylor was the girl you were talking about? She was in the accident?"
"Yeah, the girl who got caught in the middle. All indications are she should be fine. They were able to stop the internal bleeding and reset her broken bones successfully. There was no injuries to her spine of her skull. They're just waiting for her to wake up."
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When Ashley brought back the coffee and doughnuts from the gas station she noticed another person in the room and she was confused. "Spencer? What are you doing here?"
"I wanted to see how you were holding up and see if there was any change with Taylor."
"No change yet. I'm glad you came."
"I also thought we could talk for a little bit. I'm heading back today but I have an hour before I have to get to the airport."
"Ok." Ashley said as she handed Tony the load of food and caffeine.
As they headed out of the room Eric walked in and said, "I just talked to the cops. Apparently the first car to hit Tay was Kyle. The as…" he paused remembering Jay was in the room, "um… jerk was drunk., three times the legal limit to be exact. He's in jail right now. It's his fourth time getting caught."
Although everyone was mad as hell they kept it in check. Kyle wasn't worth the energy, not until they knew Taylor was ok. Ashley exchanged a few quiet words with Eric, Chris and Ryan then left the room with Spencer.
Once outside Ashley yelled, "God damn that fucking no talent ass hole."
"Wow Ash tell me how you really feel. And please don't hold anything back at all, really."
Laughing Ashley said, "Sorry about that. That just pisses me off. The fact it was someone that I kinda know just get me."
"You do know that Sarah, Kris and I were the third car right?" Spencer said, a little worried about how Ashley would respond.
"I do know. But Kyle caused the accident. Big difference."
"Ok. I just don't want you to be mad at us."
"No worries. So what did you want to talk about."
"First I have a question Ash."
"Shoot. You know you can ask me anything sweet heart."
"Look I heard some things last night and I gotta know is there anything going on between you and Taylor?"
At first all Ashley could do was laugh but then she saw the serious look on Spencer's face so she said, "We're becoming friends. Honestly I barely know her. I only met her a week ago."
"Come on Ash you know what I'm asking."
"Well I'm not fucking her if that's what you're asking. I'd never do that to you."
Spencer wanted to say something but she couldn't find the words. All she could do was look away.
"Spence, are you ok? Look I'd never cheat on you. Our relationship is too important to me. I hope you would know that."
"Ash I…" Again Spencer couldn't find the words.
"Spence what's wrong?"
"Ash I just can't do this anymore."
"Do what exactly Spencer?" Ashley said dreading what came next.
"Us Ash. I'm not as good a person as you. I have um I mean look I've changed and I just can't lead you on anymore. Here," Spence said as she handed an envelope to Ashley, "hopefully this will explain things better than I am right now. I have to go." And Spencer ran away from a stunned Ashley.
After what felt like hours, but was only a minute or so, Ashley walked over to a bench and opened the letter that Spencer had given her.
Ashlee--
Let me start this off by saying that I love you very much. The last two years have been amazing. You have made me so happy. For the first time I was truly in love.
But my asshole Dad ruined that. He threatened to cause a lot of trouble for you if I didn't go to school in Boston. There was no way I was going to let him hurt you so I went. I know it wasn't fair to keep this from you but I did and I'm sorry for that.
Since being in Boston I've changed a lot. I've done some things that I'm not proud of but I've also done things that I'm ok with. I won't go into details, I'll just say that I have cheated. I know this will hurt you but I have to be honest. I wrote this for you and hopefully it will explain how I have been feeling
Where I Stood
I don't know what I've done
Or if I like what I've begun
But something told me to run
And honey, you know me it's all or none
There were sounds in my head
A little voice is whisperin
That I should go and this should end
Oh and I found myself listening.
Cause I don't know who I am
Who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand
Another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
Cause she will love you more than I could
She who dares to stand where I stood
See I thought love was black and white
That it was wrong or it was right
But you ain't leavin without a fight
And I think I am just as torn inside
Cause I don't know who I am
Who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand
Another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
Cause she will love you more than I could
She who dares to stand where I stood
And I won't be far where you are
If ever you should call
You meant more to me than anyone
I ever loved at all
But you taught me how to trust myself
And so I say to you
This is what I have to do
Cause I don't know who I am
Who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand
Another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
Cause she will love you more than I could
She who dares to stand where I stood
She who dares to stand where I stood
I know I should have done this a better way but I don't know how. Ashley you are my first love but I don't know if I believe that first loves can last.
To quote Shinedown "Sometimes goodbye is a second chance." Maybe it will be for us someday but now I must say goodbye to you and goodbye to our relationship.
Spencer
THE END
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I know this is not the ending most were hoping for but this era in their life had to end this way. Maybe I will revisit these characters in another time and another place but for now I say goodbye to this tale. But don't worry if you enjoy my writing I have a few stories in the works.
Thank you for all the comments and encouragement
