Chapter 7

NCIS headquarters

Kensi parked the Audi in an underground garage after driving in circles for the last half hour to lose any tail she might have.

She hadn't had time to change out of last night's dress, and didn't have anything to change into anyway; certainly nothing appropriate enough for work.

She knew it was risky sneaking in at 5 looking like she did now, but she didn't have time to go home if she wanted to check that her alias was still completely backstopped and that she hadn't missed any new developments over the last two days, like her face and name ending up on police radars, which will put her in serious hot water with her team and not to mention blow her cover to smithereens.

The team usually got in around 7, but Eric always came in a good hour or so before them. She absentmindedly wondered how often he bothered going home at all.

Kensi took the elevator up, exited from an emergency exit, walked a block in one direction then retraced her steps. It was taking her longer to get to headquarters this way, but it was a necessary precaution. She wasn't particularly happy about doing it in 5 inch heels at the crack of dawn, that's for sure. She was glad the streets were relatively quiet for LA, except for a few joggers, and the homeless.

Now the hard part, she thought, as she entered NCIS and headed to her locker, where she kept a spare pair of jeans and a few shirts for after an impromptu gym-session or case of emergency.

She felt like an intruder.

She edged out of the trellis surrounding the bullpen, and tried not to look suspicious as she made a beeline for the gym, only to halt abruptly as someone cleared their throat loudly from above.

She looked up slowly, dreading what came next.

Deeks was sitting at the top of the stairs, where he had an unobstructed view of the main entrance and the bullpen, while being hidden from view himself.

She had hoped for Sam, or Callen. They would more easily buy that she went out for drinks with an old friend, and mind their own business.

She was so tired of lying to Deeks. She felt guilty and was convinced he would be able to see it all over her face.

Deeks stood up and crossed his arms.

"You're up early today… or very, very late, judging from that outfit."

He sounded calm.

Too calm, Kensi thought.

She climbed the first two steps.

"Hey, Deeks. Am I missing something? What are you doing here at 6?"

"Isn't that the million dollar question", he replied cryptically. He wasn't laughing or joking around, just staring at her stony-faced.

Kensi sighed; she really needed to change before everybody else finds them standing here like this.

"Listen, Deeks-"

"This ought to be good", he said, raising an eyebrow expectantly.

"What?"

"Just wondering what you're going to come up with now, and how you're going to explain that outfit."

"Oh", she looked down pretending to be completely unconcerned with her revealing party-dress as if she walked around at work dressed like that all the time.

"Yeah, I went out for a few celebratory drinks with an old friend and lost track of time, I didn't want to go home and risk falling asleep on the couch. I'm just going to get in a short workout and change."

And with that she took the stairs two steps at a time and brushed past him.

She could feel his gaze on her back, and hoped he was going to just let it go.

As soon as she heard his footsteps behind her, however, she knew she was out of luck.

"Did you have a good time with your mom at dinner?"

His voice was casual, as if he was asking about something as trivial as the weather.

"Oh, I didn't go. Like I said, went for drinks."

"Right, the old friend. Please tell me you at least called and canceled on poor Julia?"

She cut him a sideways glance.

"Yes, Deeks. What's the point of this conversation?"

She took out the necessary clothes from her locker and then stepped out of her booties, trying to hold back a groan of relief as she wiggled her tortured toes.

"If something was going on you would tell me, right?"

She wanted to make a joke, or slap him playfully on the arm and say 'of course', but his eyes were serious, and the way he was looking at her stopped her from brushing it aside. She felt like he was accusing her of something, but maybe that was her own feelings of guilt tricking her.

"Like what?"

He shrugged, never breaking eye contact.

"Anything important that your partner should know about…"

"Okay, you're being weirder than usual. Yes, if you needed to know or if you could help, I'd tell you. Now, can I go change?"

She walked towards one of the stalls, mostly because she wanted to get away from this uncomfortable conversation and Deeks' watchful eyes.

"Hey, Kens?", he was standing right outside the door.

"I know we don't say these things very often, but you can trust me. You know that, right?"

She hesitated.

She found herself blinking back sudden tears.

She felt- she didn't know how she felt, but she wanted to look him in the eye and tell him everything, even if he judged her, even if it made him angry.

She wanted things to go back to the way they were a month ago, but then again, not exactly.

She didn't think it was possible. She'd already proven how far she was willing to go to protect him. She wasn't sure they could still be partners after that, or if they should.

"You're my partner, Deeks. There's nobody I trust more", she whispered, because it was true, and she wanted him to know that their partnership meant as much to her as it did to him.

More, she thought, and therein lies the rub.

She buttoned up her blouse and stepped out.

"Tell me what's going on."

His voice was low and soft and his hand came up to brush a strand of her hair off her face.

She almost gave in, but when she opened her mouth all she could see was Cappo's face. All she could hear was Cappo's voice in her ear telling her he'd cut off every one of Deeks' fingers and then put a bullet in his brain.

She'd fix it.

She's dealing with Cappo, so she'd just continue to do that for a little while longer.

So what if she has to keep sleeping with a snake that made her skin crawl. She was a big girl, and this job required worse from her most of the time. This was her problem, so she'd just man up and fix it herself before somebody got hurt.

She knew Cappo was here for today's shipment and some other business transactions, and then he'd have to be back in Italy.

After he leaves she'd be able to tell the team what happened and they could come up with a solid plan for Cappo and his men.

"Nothing. Everything's fine, Deeks."

She wanted to cringe at the look on his face.

He looked hurt and very pissed at the same time, but then from one second to the next his face was devoid of all expression.

He yanked his hand back from her hair and stuffed both hands in his front pockets.

"Let's go. Callen wants us in ops", with that he walked out leaving her feeling more alone than she's ever felt before.


AN: I don't know what to say.

Here's some Densi, sorry about making them miserable.

I needed a one-on-one between these two that is more than just light teasing. This was originally just a short intro to the whole Kensi-explanation chapter, but it seems I still haven't learned how to keep it short! It became a chapter on its own, hope you didn't mind.

To "somethinginbetween" and everybody else who needs answers and needs them... 2 weeks ago,
be patient juuuuuuust a little while longer? After the next chapter you can howl and rage if you're still unsatisfied.

S.

-leave me a review? :)