A/N: It's a tad on the short side, but I'm happy with it regardless. I love writing long chapters, but sometimes achieving 4,000 plus words is enough, especially during a rough work week.
"Check."
Alice stared at her chess board in disbelief, causing a slight smirk to form on Khan's face.
Over a month had passed since the two had come to their agreement, and Khan had done his best to appease to Alice's need to be in control of something. It was merely an illusion of control, she really having none at all, but he'd learned quickly that he'd been pushing too hard and Marcus had done the same. To truly get to the doctor, to bring her to his side, he needed to make her believe she was in control and slowly yank that rug out from under her. And so he had be leaking her bits and pieces of information that he could afford whisper, though he purposefully avoided telling her anything about the torpedoes.
He still had he crew to consider, and he would not risk their lives any more than he already was by telling her trade secrets. Those torpedoes would be the key in getting his people out of Section 31 alive. No, those torpedoes were off limits to Alice for now.
A few minutes passed as Alice stared at the board with her fingers interlaced beneath her chin. "Been thinking about what to do about Christmas this year, given that it's only eighteen days away. I'll probably spend it down here or I'll just go out for a nice walk. Of course, I could always go to the club again, but being that it didn't… agree with me last time, I think I'll pass for something simpler, you know, away from twisted jackasses."
A small smile tugged at his lips.
Doyle had quickly worked his way up to the top of Alice's shit list, something she discreetly and not so discreetly brought up on occasion. "I suggest you go for a walk, doctor, considering that you're in such close proximity to one in particular whilst down here."
Doyle wasn't exactly far away, his office being on another level with the security feed constantly at his disposal.
"Oh, I don't know. You're not that bad."
Khan snapped his gaze up to her, and his frown deepened when he saw the teasing smile on her face. It was a change from her normally serious, challenging attitude and chilly disposition. In truth, she'd been quite… enjoyable over the past few days.
It was odd.
"I forgot to ask," Alice started after a moment. "How's the book I lent you?"
"Intriguing," he replied with a knowing half-smile.
The doctor had kept her promise of giving him access to whatever it was that he requested over the month. So as to avoid suspicion, he'd mentioned a few books that he liked after making the deal with her, and she went out to purchase them but kept them in her quarters for a day or two before offering to let him borrow them for however long he desired. Technically they were not his, but he had complete access to the books, and so began their little game that involved her figuring out what he wanted.
To go about telling her what he enjoyed and wanted during their sessions only to end up having them in his possession would draw suspicion after a time, so he'd had to figure out a way to get her the information without alerting Doyle who would be constantly watching the security footage. It didn't take him too long to come up with a plan, and it had been amusing to watch Alice attempt to figure it out seeing as he would not tell her for obvious reasons.
All he told her was that the answer was right under her nose while she held the first book she'd "lent" him. She'd been so frustrated that she'd damn near chucked that very book at him, only just managing to reign in her desire to lash out. But his words had stuck with her, and in a few short days she'd noticed something peculiar with her book after flipping through it.
Certain pages had been dog-eared, pages that would have been odd places to stop for a break, and Khan knew that she would find it odd given that it would take him a fairly short time to read even a five-hundred page book. On those pages there were certain words that had been repeatedly run over by ones finger nail, and each marred word on each dog-eared page was a part of a code that read out the title of the next book he wished to read, or was a sentence requesting something else such as pen and paper. He knew that it was only a matter of time before she figured it out, she being quite smart and clever.
Sure enough, a few days later when he came to her quarters for his morning session – they'd taken to meeting in her quarters now as opposed to his – he spotted the book he'd listed within the first book.
Now that she'd figured it out they could avoid suspicion altogether. After all, how could one accuse him of asking for things when he didn't speak a word and was merely permitted to borrow seemingly random items in Alice's possession?
It set into motion the first portion of his plan which was gaining her trust whilst easing back on planting that seed of doubt towards Starfleet. In fact, he doubted he had to further voice the fact that Marcus was untrustworthy and dangerous. Admiral Marcus and Commander Doyle were doing that job for him by regularly threatening and scaring her.
They should have stuck a fancy bow on her head, for they'd essentially given her to him as a present they hadn't intended for her to be.
"So, it's worth the read?" she asked as she moved her king to a spot that put him out of danger.
He nodded, taking a moment to consider his pieces before moving his knight into position and taking one of hers. Alice was a talented chess player, but she was hardly a pro. He had her right where he wanted her, and she was falling into his trap so easily it was almost disappointing, and as of yet she'd not won a single game and they played every couple of days when time permitted it.
As disappointing as it was for her to regularly fall for his tricks in chess, he genuinely enjoyed their time playing the game more often than he didn't.
"You should find it thoroughly enjoyable," he replied seriously with no double meaning in regards to their agreement.
If he told her the book was dull, she would merely flip through it and make like she was fixing the pages he'd dog-eared before putting it away to gather dust, but if he told her it was good, she would take the time to actually read it after "fixing the pages". She seemed to genuinely value his opinion and typically he didn't steer her wrong when it came to what he thought she would like.
Cocking her head at the chess board, contemplating her next move, she asked, "You certainly do enjoy reading, Khan, more so than anyone else I've ever met. Did you have access to books in the facility in India?"
He sighed, pinning her with a weary look before taking a drink from his coffee.
"It bothers you, doesn't it?" she observed, briefly removing her attention from the game. "Talking about that facility."
"It doesn't bother me."
"Then why do you refuse to answer any of my questions regarding it?"
"Because there's not a single reason why you need to know what went on," he answered tersely. "Any important information is on what records that exist."
"Well," she started with the hint of a smile. "I want to know about the unimportant information."
His gaze turned to her before returning to the board, irritated. "Don't attempt to be cute, doctor, it doesn't suit you."
Smirking, keenly aware that she was poking at a subject she shouldn't be messing with, she moved her queen to her desired spot, and asked, "Who says I'm trying to be cute? I really do want to know about what you consider to be unimportant."
"Why?" he questioned bitingly, the irritation he felt slipping into his words. "So you can file it away in some report? Perhaps you believe that such revelations will fix your career. Dr. Alice Walsh, the woman who figured Khan Noonien Singh out. Is that your plan?"
Alice stared at him, all traces of humor gone. "Any time I bring up that place or the Chrysalis Program, you turn exceptionally rude and bitter, and you always turn on me, claiming that I've got some sort of hidden agenda with my questions. I think what went on down there bothers you more than you care to admit to anyone, even to yourself. If you let it, I think your resentment, anger, and downright hate of people can cause you to falter in anything you try to accomplish."
She was pushing her luck, she truly was, and he moved his next piece with growing frustrating after she made her move.
What went on in that facility was information she could easily find in the scant amount of documents Marcus had available. However, what went on in his mind while down there was his business and his alone, but damned if it affected him negatively.
Anger, hate, the need for revenge – all those things were as vital to him as air, as the blood in his veins. They were what made him who he was and they made him powerful.
Alice hadn't a clue what she was talking about.
"If mere memories could make me falter, Dr. Walsh, I wouldn't have reigned over more than one-quarter of Earth's population in the twentieth century," he explained tightly, insulted that he even needed to do so. "Were my years spent in the Program traumatic? To a meek human, it would seem as such, but to me it was all something to be learned from."
"Why traumatic?" she asked, moving her queen yet again, removing one of his pieces.
He moved his bishop to his chosen square with enough force to rattle the other pieces, growing increasingly irritated and angry with Alice's annoying questions. "What do you mean?"
"Why did you choose the word 'traumatic'?" she clarified, studying the pieces. "I don't believe I've used that word to describe your youth, so you came up with that description on your own even though you claim that what all went on was just a lesson. Why'd you choose that word?"
"Because it is merely a word which seemed fitting to the topic," he snapped sharply, hardly paying attention to her move before he made his, feeling his heart begin to pound in his chest in time with his rising anger.
She was pushing it, and if she didn't watch herself he just might snap.
"Fitting in deed, I would say," she agreed with a knowing smile. And then she moved her queen, and her smile turned triumphant. "Check mate."
Khan frowned and turned his eyes to the chess board, unwilling to believe that Alice had beaten him.
It would appear that while they'd been bickering, she'd been strategically placing her pieces around his king until her queen had it effectively pinned in a corner with nowhere to run.
He didn't know if he was appalled, embarrassed, or impressed.
"That's my point, Khan," Alice began, seeing fit to explain how she'd finally beaten him. "My asking you about the facility, pushing the topic, even with you claiming that it was not traumatic made you lose focus. It was all because I asked a few simple questions that irked you. Superhuman or not, you're still human – you can still feel, and what you feel can make you screw up once in a while."
Khan said nothing in reply, grinding his teeth as he began returning the pieces to their rightful places.
She sighed, shaking her head. "Believe it or not, I do want to know, and not because I want to advance or even fix my career."
"Then why do you want to know?" he demanded, tired of playing games.
For a long moment, she said nothing, but she did stand and walk over to the single dresser in her quarters. She picked up a photo, staring at it sorrowfully before returning to her seat and handing it to him.
Holding the wooden frame in his hands, he found himself staring at a photo of a family – a man, a woman, and a little girl around the age of six or seven. The family was sitting in a garden overwhelmed by lilies, and the little girl was sitting between her parents with the brightest smile on her face, her green eye wide and happy as she looked up at the camera along with them.
"You're not the only one who's lost your family, and you certainly aren't the only one who's had a traumatic childhood," she explained carefully, tucking her feet under her and setting her PADD to the side. "Bouncing from foster home to foster home at the age of seven and up, not knowing if the family will be nice or beat you senseless for touching the refrigerator without asking… makes for some nasty memories. Hell, there are some nights even now where I have nightmares of some of the things that went on with some of the families." Sighing, she looked away briefly before bring her eyes back to him. "I'm not saying that what we went through is in any way similar – you lost your people recently, and you were raised in an underground facility. What I'm saying, is that I'm probably the only person you're likely to come across anytime soon who has an idea of that kind of pain."
Khan glanced up at her reference to her past in foster care.
He'd read in her file that he'd hacked into that she lost her parents to a foreign virus while they went on a trip to some planet, leaving Alice in the care of a family friend. With no guardian to claim her, she was placed into foster care where she acted out and caused more than a few families to be rid of her so they wouldn't have to put up with her. She had, however, been taken from more than a couple families after schools reported her coming in with bruises, cuts, and a split lip on occasion.
There was one family though that she stayed with from for quite some time. Why she had to leave, the file didn't say, but it was around the age of sixteen and that was when she apparently began showing an interest in Starfleet, regularly contacting Admiral Pike and other friends of her parents who had both been with Starfleet.
She'd yet to reveal to him the reason for her seemingly unbreakable desire to protect her career, but he suspected it had something to do with her parents. Only time would tell whether he was correct. For now, he merely wondered why she'd brought up such a touchy subject regarding her past without him pressing for information.
People did nothing out of the kindness of their hearts, nor did the offer up pieces of themselves without expecting something in return. Claims could be made that there were a few genuinely good people in the world, but in his experience that just wasn't the case and was nothing more than a lie meant to help people sleep at night.
How many times had he been told by scientists, soldiers, and the woman who wished to be called his mother in his youth that they only wished to help him succeed, to be the best of the Chrysalis Program? How many times did they claim that they had his best interests at heart when in reality they wanted to turn him into the leader of their own personal super-soldier army that they could keep on a short leash?
And after his escape with his fellow Augments?
He'd seen firsthand how good deeds and kindness were merely ways to get at something someone else wanted, whether it be a worldly possession or information. Even the man who had befriended him, Gary Seven, had used him to one degree or another and was willing to kill him simply because Khan had his own way of doing things.
In turn, Khan too warped kindness and good deeds into ways to achieve his own personal goals. That trait had always been a part of him, but in the years prior to his reign that trait had become far more prominent until it was wholly ingrained into his very being.
And thus he knew that Alice something up her sleeve. It was the only explanation for her revealing something she need not reveal, and he wasn't falling for it.
"Doctor," Khan drawled wearily, setting the framed photo down. "Do you wish for me to confide in you based on your perceived belief that I underwent some sort of trauma, just as you were traumatized by no family wishing to keep you for more than a few months, with the exception of one? You are mistaken if you believe I would reveal information privy only to myself for you to use to advance your career."
She flinched ever so slightly at his words, but otherwise barely reacted, having expected such a reaction from him. "Despite our… situation," she began in regards to their deal. "I do give a damn about my patients, even you to certain degree despite the fact that you can be a cold hearted ass with total disregard for the feelings of others. If I didn't care, I promise you that I wouldn't have told you what I did, nor would I still be sitting here wasting my breath in an attempt to convince you that I genuinely do want to know what happened and… why you are the way you are – outside of the fundamentals of your genetic engineering."
He frowned. "You expect nothing in return? Am I to take that as truth?"
"Take it however you want," she replied with a shrug. "I'm merely letting you know that I understand trauma and the loss of family, and I'm willing to listen to anything you have to say about, well, anything."
It was difficult to tell whether Alice was lying on occasion seeing as she was very good at it, probably something she had to learn to be good at during her years in some particular unfriendly foster families, but the truth was the hardest to tell with her, especially when what she claimed to be the truth was something that he wasn't used to hearing as anything but a lie. One thing he did take notice of, however, was that sometimes she took notes on her PADD whenever they talked, and sometimes she didn't. This was one of those times where she didn't.
Could that be an indication that she was being truthful and not out to gain information for the benefit of her career, but that she was instead just looking to be kind and wanted nothing from him in return?
As he opened his mouth to make some sort of reply, though he wasn't sure what exactly he was going to say, the console at Alice's door beeped as someone requested entry.
She sighed, standing to answer the door, and when it slid open to reveal two burly men in black uniforms, she said to Khan, "You're friends are here. Looks like our session is over."
"It would appear so," Khan replied as he stood, feeling something akin to disappointment. The conversation was not one he wanted to have, but the curiosity he now felt towards Alice's words left him wishing to continue it.
As well as to demand a rematch of chess.
Staring at the door after it slid shut behind Khan, Alice went over to the book he'd left behind and began flipping through the pages to find what he wanted next, planning to read it later.
She had to wonder if her change of attitude would have the desired effect on Khan, or if it was just a waste of time. It was obvious that he reacted to hostility, and her challenging him had intrigued him, but it occurred to her a few days ago that Khan had been around people using him, behind hostile to him, and kneeling down to kiss his boots all his life.
Had there been one instance in that man's life where someone just... acted decently without asking for anything in return?
Carol told her more than once that when not working, Alice was friendly and quite enjoyable to be around. Maybe if she injected a little bit of "Alice" into her dealings with Khan and less "Doctor Walsh" she'd see a different side to him.
And so she'd been trying to loosen up and bit more approachable and less cold, though she still challenged him because that was just who she was, and she noticed that he'd stare at her as if trying to figure her out more often than he used to and would study her in silence or try purposefully to irritated her into lashing out. She couldn't tell if he liked this change or not, so today was the first day she chose to reveal something personal about herself without asking for anything from him.
Talking about her time in foster care, no matter how vaguely, was something that brought an ache to her heart, the memories painful even to this day. She hadn't particularly wanted to tell him a damn thing about it, or to anyone else for that matter, but she truly felt that if she were going to ask him to discuss something that obviously bothered him she should tell him something as well. If he opened up to her, that was great, if not, that was fine. She wasn't going to demand that he talk about it if he didn't want to, though she wasn't going to give up on asking once in a while, and she certainly was going to remind him regularly that she did in fact care.
Alice wasn't entirely sure why she cared. Maybe it was because a lot of the terrible things he did were based off of his genetic engineering, or perhaps it was because he'd lost his family. Then again, maybe it was a bit of both, coupled with the fact that in all honesty he wasn't terrible to be around.
When they weren't at each other's throats or discussing things pertaining to her evaluations, he could be decent to be around, even enjoyable to a degree. Something she'd even come to enjoy quite measurably was their time playing chess. The game had always been her favorite, and Khan was an incredibly challenging opponent. To have finally beat him, even if she had to get his mind off the game itself, was a huge victory that had her grinning at the time and smiling now.
Once she put together the words in the book that Khan had scraped his nail over, she nodded to herself and made a mental note to go out in the next day or two to get the next book for him before getting back to work.
Review, please! Reviews let me know that you wish for more!
A/N: As of July 31, I am still suffering from a major case of writer's block. I'm doing my best to finish the next chapter, but I can't say for sure when the next update will come.
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Works In-Progress:
Star Trek ~ "The Choices We Make"... Khan/OFC
Falling Skies ~ "The Ties That Bind"... Ben/OFC
Carriers ~ "Fate of the Chosen"... Brian/OFC
Legion ~ "Salvation Falls"... Michael/OFC
