Colours of the Night

Chapter 7

Hangovers and Tears

He woke up the next morning with a massive hangover. His head pounded and his throat was raw from drunken ramblings. After returning from the club, he'd drunk himself stupid, desperately trying to drown his insistent need for Lily in alcohol.

He turned onto his side, the leather sofa creaking beneath him. His body was caked in sweat, as his dreams had been full of nightmares about Lily. He pulled his chest off the sofa and promptly threw up litres of firewhiskey all over the floor.

"Bugger," he groaned. He grabbed his wand and made the mess disappear. It was high time he learnt not to drink heavily on an empty stomach.

He slowly stood and padded to the kitchen to get a drink of water. He sighed, holding his thudding head.

"Merlin, shit," why did he let Lily push him this far.

He suddenly remembered what he was scheduled to do that afternoon. It was a rather important and high priority Quidditch match. Shit, he thought, how the hell was he supposed to play if he was this hungover? There was a knock at the door. It was Andy.

"Hey, mate," he greeted, "all ready for this afternoon?"

"What?" James asked.

"This afternoon? The match…?"

"Can you stop shouting?" James asked, rubbing his temples.

"What? Mate, I'm talking in my normal tone," Andy said.

"Well, can you whisper then?" James asked wearily, holding onto the doorframe for support.

"Are you drunk, mate?" Andy asked.

"Who? Me?" James said loudly, wincing as his voice echoed painfully in his head.

"James? Mate?"

"No…" he said finally. "I've just got a terrible hangover."

"Bloody hell!" Andy said. "Captain, we have a match."

"I bloody know," James said.

"Merlin, help us," he watched James swaying. "We ain't gonna win without you, mate."

"Hmm…" James answered quietly.

"Shit!" he paused, watching James' face. "I know that redhead is hot, but is she really worth this?" he asked.

"Yeah, she is," James said. "I've loved her since I was fourteen."

"No way!"

James nodded, "that's what Lily used to say."

"She didn't believe you?"

"No."

"I can understand. Being told by someone that they love you at the age of fourteen, would be a massive shock, I suppose," Andy said thoughtfully.

James shrugged, "she would never go out with me. Told me I was a conceited git. I guess I was, really."

"I'm sure you weren't…" he trailed off.

"I was an immature arse. I had everything, money, good looks, intelligence… everything except her. I was an arrogant arse." He laughed, "And Lily knew it."

"What happened then?" Andy asked, as James led him into the kitchen to get some coffee.

"In seventh year, we began to become friends. I still loved her, but I was quite content with the way things were between us. For the first time Lily and I weren't screaming at each other every time we came near each other. That contentedness didn't last long. Hell did I want more? I always have. We spent so much time together and all I wanted to was to take her in my arms and love her. Even now, when I've slept with her, I still want more. I had the world back then; I knew nothing more than the sheltered life that I had been brought up in."

Andy sighed, "She is an amazing person. I wish I had known her as the girl she was, no matter how hot the girl I know is now."

"She's always been this hot, Andy, that's the point. She was the same gorgeous face, but she had respect… for herself. The girl I love would never flaunt herself. She was insecure, a lot of the time. She thought she was ugly, for Merlin's sake." He took a sip of coffee, the warmth and caffeine helping to cure his hangover. He was sobering quickly, particularly with the subject of the conversation.

"Perhaps it's time I grew up and realised the truth, my Lily is gone… and she's not coming back." He sobbed slightly. "Hell, I can't even begin to think of giving up on her."

"Maybe it's time…" Andy comforted.

"Maybe it is," James replied quietly. He ruffled his hair. "I think I'm gonna have a shower, I'll catch you in the changing room."

"Right, mate."


She held the photo palm up, gazing at it. Another tear deflected off the silver frame. Her smiling mother grinned up at her. She sobbed once again.

What would you're mother think?

Yes, but my Mother is dead, Potter. She doesn't know what I do, or what my darling father did to me. She sees nothing.

Why did she have to leave? Why had she left Lily to face this cruel world on her own? It wasn't fair. Her mother had been a good person, who had been taken before her time. Why couldn't it have been her father? Or sister? Her mother would have never let her become this.

Lily Marie Evans, will you go out with me?

How could he still want her after all this? He deserved so much more. James. Dear, sweet, loving, trusting, loyal James. She wanted nothing more than to date him. He was so sweet and caring. He still looked out for her when no-one else would.

How could he still care? And how could he still want a relationship with her? She was a broken woman, who had been taken advantage of so many times. Yet James wanted her. For her. Not for sex. Not for money. No. James wanted her, for her.

And she adored him. She couldn't say she loved him… not yet. But she was deeply attracted to him. She looked up to him, and wanted nothing more than to be in a romantic relationship with him. But it could never be.

She gave another sob, waves of grief washing over her. Both for her mother's death and the fact that she could never date the man she was so close to loving.

She sighed, tiredly. After she had abandoned the club, she had cried herself to sleep. When she'd woken up that morning she had immediately started crying, staring at the picture of her mother. She had been so beautiful with stunning green eyes and auburn hair. Her father had never deserved her.

She refused to talk to anyone or take any customers on, so eventually Derek had to seek her and rat her out of her hiding place.

She was still crying when her boss entered the room. She didn't even lift her head when she heard the door snap shut behind him.

"Lily-Flower," he said, "you can't keep hiding up here all day."

She gave another sob, concealing her head in her pillow.

"The Arrows have a match today. They're playing Puddlemere United." He raised an eyebrow, "I thought we could go and check it out." Derek was a strong supporter of the Appleby Arrows.
She shook her head, wiping tears out of her eyes. "No way."

He looked at her, "Flower?"

"I hate him! Look what he does to me!"

"I think you like him," Derek said, instantly catching on to who she was talking about. He could see it in her eyes, she adored him.

She looked at him anxiously. She didn't want him to know, she could lose her job. The last thing she needed was for her boss to know that she deeply lusted after one particular man. "It's just an infatuation," she spluttered.

He looked at her calmly. "Don't get involved, Lil, he'll do you no good. He's a bloody Quidditch player. He ain't gonna settle for a prostitute, Darling."

"I know, Derek, it's just I want him. He affects me in a way no man has ever affected me before." She wiped off her tears.

"It'll be okay, soon enough he'll disappear off, and you won't have to worry about him ever again." Derek promised.

She turned to look at him fully for the first time during the conversation. She nodded lightly, "this changes nothing."

"Quite right."
Lily moved over to the sink in her room and washed her tears away. She brushed her hair into a ponytail and put a touch of make-up on.

Derek watched her, "do one customer for me, and then we'll go to check out the match."

She nodded once again, putting on a fake smile.

"Harold's with the guy out front."

"Alright."