A/N: Hey guys! Here's another chapter for this story which I translated last week.
I do not own Kingdom Hearts franchise and its characters. Those belong to Square Enix and Walt Disney Interactive.
Chapter 7 - WTF!? (Decorations!)
"Wow, that tree is HUGE!" Luxord exclaimed in the living room while looking at the Christmas Tree. It was finally in the place where it was fit perfectly – it had taken them about 12 hours to finish – and now only thing left was to decorate it. Saïx had tried order these peasants around in Xemnas' place because he was on the verge of another mental breakdown – how was he even able to get so many in few days? – but these people just refused to listen to him.
"Stop worshipping and put these decorations on the tree!" Saïx grumbled and as if to give more power to his words he hit the decorations' box with his whip.
Larxene looked at the whip with a dreamy look on her face. Saïx was sure that she was thinking how much she'd love to whip everyone around with it.
"Roxas was so lucky..." Luxord mumbled as he climbed the ladder to put decorations on the treetop of the tree. Marluxia did the same thing on his side of the tree while Xigbar was dancing to a Miley Cyrus album which was on max volume. And what's worse, Saïx and Xemnas were the only ones who hated it. Everyone else enjoyed the music which echoed in every corner of the castle. Even Larxene seemed to be doing some awkward dance moves to the songs.
"You don't look like a very effective leader with that whip in your hands", DiZ critisized.
"Shut up, and decorate the tree if you have nothing else to do", Saïx told him.
"But I can't. I have a limited eyesight as you can see. Also, I'm waiting for a huge Sea Salt Ice Cream shipment from Radiant Garden's ice cream seller", DiZ shot back and laughed. "Also, I will most definitely stumble on this red thing I'm wearing..."
"And what do I do with this information?" Saïx wanted to know.
"I don't know."
"I told Xemnas it would be a mistake to invite you here. Why can't he believe me?"
"But you're pretty far below on the Organization ranks, number 7."
"Shut it, this is a democracy."
"'Democracy'?" DiZ laughed. "Are you sure Xemnas knows what that means?"
"I bet he does."
"I bet he doesn't."
"Oh for the fuck's sake, man, why don't you just leave and go figure out some philosophic questions?" Saïx said, feeling annoyed.
"I need lemon tea and biscuits and a philosophic person to join me in that case."
"Thank you for that useless piece of information. Now, get out", Saïx said.
DiZ looked amused as he left the place. While he did, he walked right into the ladder that Marluxia was standing on. He was putting on a cherry blossom chain onto the tree.
"NO!" pink haired man yelled as the chain was cut in half as he fell onto the floor.
DiZ stumbled on his way out of the door and then fell off the stairs – and he laughed like a excited little kid. Saïx was sure that this guy was a crazy person.
"Everyone's crazy in this group..." blue haired man mumbled.
"And he finally gets it. Could you help me up now?" Marluxia asked from the floor.
"Or help me to get down from this tree?" Luxord's voice said.
Saïx looked up, and saw him hanging on the branches of the treetop by his hood. Then, suddenly, the treetop began to bent towards the ground and Luxord's expression turned into a horrified one.
"I don't wanna die!" he yelled and tried to rip off the hood on his jacket to get back down.
"This is entertaining", Larxene said. Then she took the whip from Saïx's hands. "And finally this is mine!"
"Larxene, don't play with that!" Marluxia said and stood up with speed that Saïx didn't know he possessed – Marluxia was kinda slow usually – and he ran over to Larxene.
"No, Flower Boy, I'm not gonna give it back. If you try something, I'll whip you around a bit", Larxene told him.
Marluxia touched his hair and took few steps back. Larxene looked satisfied as she laughed for a moment and then she just threw the whip into the corner, which made Saïx furrow his eyebrows.
"Larxene, are you OK? You've been weird ever since you returned from the shopping trip", he said. "Maybe you should go see Vexen."
"I will never go meet Vexen in his laboratory. The last time I did that he thought I had volunteered to be a guinea pig for his experiments."
"I dunno what's up with you but I kinda like this new Larxene", Marluxia said, obviously relieved that he didn't have to get beaten up by the crazy woman.
Larxene was about to say something but was interrupted with a loud thud and a crack noise when Luxord fell from the tree and through the floor. But it wasn't the worst thing; the treetop branch which had been stuck on his hood had bent down with him and before anyone could help the poor blonde, tree straightened up again, pulling him out of the hole.
"MOMMY HELP ME!" Luxord yelled as he flew out of the window. Only his clothes were left behind. Saïx, Larxene and Marluxia looked at the remains in surprise.
"Well, that tree is obviously more vicious than I thought", Naminé's voice said from a corner where she was setting up her artistic studio.
"Are you gonna write a book next, Naminé?" Larxene asked.
"No, I'm going to paint Luxord's fall from grace", blonde girl answered.
"Wonderful!"
"I would do the same with Demyx and Xaldin as well but I wasn't present when it happened and I can't even imagine it right."
"Why don't you take it out from Sora's memories? Do it as painfully as possible so I could be happy again."
"Sorry, Larxene, I don't want to hurt him", Naminé said and began to draw on a huge A2 sized paper.
If I'm completely honest though, I wouldn't miss Luxord one bit. He's always stealing everyone's money in that Poker game of his, Saïx thought. I'd rather argue with Larxene 24/7 than play Poker with Luxord..."
"Hmm, maybe I should put up a gallery for my art. I do have a lot of these laying around in my room after all", Naminé wondered aloud as she finished the sketch for her new painting.
"Not a bad idea at all, Naminé. Just make sure that a lot of the paintings are violent", Larxene told her.
"Naminé, do you still have that Larxene/Axel painting somewhere in your room?" Marluxia asked. "I think that was fabulous."
"Yes, it's on my wall, actually. It's my personal favorite but then again, I love painting flames", Naminé answered.
"What is this?" Larxene demanded to know.
"Oh, you didn't know? I think you and Axel would be a nice couple", Naminé said. "And apparently Marluxia seems to think that way too."
"I would never be with a guy like that. He gets on my nerves all the fucking time!"
"Opposites attract", Marluxia grinned. "I'd like to create a romantic blind date for you guys."
"Are you sure you'd like to keep talking, Marluxia?" Larxene asked in a threatening voice.
"Yes, I'd love to, thanks for asking. I love the sound of my own voice so much that I'd like to talk for hours just for you."
What the hell is happening here? Saïx wondered as he looked at the surprised Larxene and grinning Marluxia. Something's going on between these two, he added. As much as he wanted to interrupt, he was also way too curious to see what was happening. After all, he might finally be able to figure out the reason behind Larxene's weird behaviour – not that he actually cared though.
Larxene looked troubled for a little while longer before she sighed in defeat – which Saïx hadn't expected to happen – and said, "Alright, Flower Boy, I find it hard to disagree with that one. But you are not allowed to go and plan a blind date for me and the annoying red head."
"Aw, nuts", Marluxia said. "C'mon, Larxene, you could chill and not bully everyone for a while if you went out on a date."
"Why don't you go out with him if you love him so much?"
"I'm not attracted to men, sorry."
"You're not?" Larxene's voice was suspicious. "I seriously doubt that."
"I'm just as straight as you, Larxene", Marluxia grinned. "Did you know that you're funny?"
"Are you hitting on me!?" Larxene's voice said in disbelief.
"I dunno, I've never done this before. Do you think I'm doing so?"
"Yes, I'm pretty sure that you are doing so. You're that crazy."
"Since when has craziness been somehow connected to the fact that I'm trying to win you over?"
"I dunno. Ask Vexen", Larxene said, smiling.
"I think your discussion is very interesting but could be possibly continue decorating the house? We still have about 200 floors to go", Saïx interrupted.
"Oh yeah, I forgot", Marluxia said. "Larxene, you have to help me since Luxord successfully flew out of the window", he added.
"Does anyone know what happened to DiZ? His voice faded out after 30th floor", Xigbar's voice asked.
"Why aren't you listening to Miley Cyrus anymore?" Larxene asked, as she got up on another ladder to help Marluxia with decorating.
"My battery's dead on my iPod", Xigbar said, sighing sadly.
"Thank god", Larxene mumbled.
"I think you would actually be a better match with Zexion", Marluxia said.
"Stop it, Marluxia", Larxene grumbled.
"Never!"
"If you thought you have a chance with me, you're so wrong", Larxene mumbled.
"Why are you two arguing like a old married couple?" Saïx asked.
"We do not!" Larxene said and started to put up the decorations onto the tree branches with intense speed.
Marluxia didn't say anything on the subject and picked up cherry blossom ribbon from the floor and them climbed his ladder to the top where he began to put the ribbon on the wall. He began whistle Christmas carols as Xigbar began to decorate the lower branches of the tree with silver, gold and bronze balls.
"I totally love Christmas", Marluxia said after a 30 minute long silence.
"I agree", Xigbar said.
"I disagree", Larxene said.
"I think you're only lying to yourself, Larxene", Marluxia told her.
"I doubt it. This part of the year is from HELL", Larxene said and rolled her eyes as if it was the obvious answer. "Everyone should know that by now..."
"If you're worried of bullies, I can protect you..."
"I can take care of myself perfectly well, Flower Boy."
"Ah, C'mon, I think it's fun to be affectionate towards someone facing the same fate", Marluxia said and then held tightly on the ladder as they almost fell on the floor again. "Oh hell, these are definitely on the verge of breaking down. Why can't Xemnas buy new ones?"
Saïx agreed – the ladder Marluxia was standing on were unstable because they had been patched up with duck tape on various places.
"Saïx, you gotta talk about this to Xemmy when you meet him again", Marluxia added.
"I could, but Xemnas doesn't let me talk because he complains ridiculously much", Saïx said – which was another truth.
"What does he complain so much about?" Larxene asked curiously.
"You. You people are terrible suborninates according to him."
"So he gets mental breakdowns because of us?" Marluxia asked.
"I don't know."
"Why does he complain about us then?"
"It's not my business to tell you. Ask him yourselves. I suggest you give him a bottle of Jack Daniels first though."
"Why should we get him drunk to tell us what we wanna know?"
"Really? I thought you wanted to know the reason behind Xemnas' mental breakdowns", Saïx asked, raising his eyebrows.
"He thought we were his enemies and tried to kill us last time he was drunk so I think it's better if he was sober", Marluxia said.
"I would take the risk though", Xigbar interrupted. "The reason behind Xemnas' mental breakdowns must be epic..."
"So you'd like to hunt Xemnas down, and force him to take tranquilizer, then?" Larxene asked. "Go ahead, Xigbar. Have fun."
"When did this happen?" Saïx asked curiously. He had no memory of this event!
"It was last month. Xemnas doesn't remember it at all because he was so drunk and we didn't really want to tell you", Marluxia said, followed by a crack of the step he was standing on. He fell off the ladder while letting out a very feminine scream.
"I HATE THIS LADDER! AND THE GODDAMN DUCK TAPE!" he yelled on the floor as the ladder came down on him.
A/N: Yeah, Marluxia/Larxene is gonna happen soon. I don't really ship them anymore, but I didn't want to change this story – well, that much, at least. It does have some differences compared to the old 2006-2007 version – because I like it the most as it is. Next chapter will be written from everyone's favorite, Axel's point of view. :)
