I waited anxiously for Four to arrive excited to see a friendly face. When he walked in he didn't look happy though. "Tris it is so good to see you," he said, cracking a smile. I felt butterfly's when he said that, all my anxiety washing away. "Where have you been?" he asked.
"I don't really know, after I had breakfast I was walking back to the dormitory to get some clean clothes and then the pain was too bad so I sat down somewhere. Next thing I woke up in some hospital room. The nurse told me I needed to rest and everything else is kind of foggy until I woke up back here," I explained.
"People said you were eating with Eric, why didn't you eat with your friends, tell them you weren't feeling well?" he asked.
"I wanted to talk to him about the fight, I honestly can't remember now though what happened," I lied.
Four came and sat next to my bed and put his hand over mine, I smiled at him and felt safe. "I never should have agreed to let you up, I knew how injured you were, I am sorry Tris," he apologized. It was so much easier being around Four, I didn't know why I thought spending all the time and energy on Eric would be good for me.
I spent the next week in the recovery room before I was finally allowed to head back to the dormitory. I was still limited in my actions but I was now able to function on my own, excited to start the mental trainings the next day. Four informed me I had just missed some education and one practice round, nothing he couldn't catch me up on. It was great to see Christina, Will, Al, Erin and Keke, had me feeling like my old self in no time. It was nice not having to see Eric after our last encounter ended so awkwardly.
"You nervous for your first try at the fear landscape?" Christina asked, as we sat up on my bed just chatting after we had finished dinner.
"Yes, it sounds awful. I don't even know what I am scared of." She laughed, hearing all the stories of everyone's fears had me thinking of what might come up on mine. "I am just glad to be back and training."
"It has been tough without you, you missed so much. Will and I slept together!" She said, bouncing up and down. "It was great, brought us closer together besides it is like the best feeling in the world."
"Okay too much information," I giggled.
"Come on Tris you have to get out of the training room and experience the Dauntless life, all you ever do is work out and now that you are hurt it is the perfect time to meet someone," she pushed.
"I don't like anyone," I said.
"What about Four?" she asked with a grin.
"He is our instructor, and he's practically a leader, no way."
"You think he spends all that extra time with you because it is his job? No way, he definitely likes you. You just need to show him you're not a stiff anymore and are interested."
"How am I supposed to do that?" I asked her, not hating the idea. Four and I had become closer each day we spent together and he was always brushing my arm our touching my leg but I didn't know how to respond, I wished he would just take control and make a move because I never was going to.
"Just walk up to him and kiss him," she suggested.
"Okay that is ridiculous," I said rolling my eyes. "He did tell me if I wanted to show up to his apartment with a bottle of alcohol I was welcome…"
"That is perfect!" Christina yelled, "Practically an invitation, plus a drink will loosen you up."
"Maybe after I pass and become an actual member of Dauntless," I told her.
"Fine," she agreed. With that we decided it was time to call it a night, I wanted to be rested for my first attempt at the fear landscape.
I was happy Four was the one administering the test, it helped me relax about the whole thing. "I am going to inject you and it will trigger the hallucination," he explained. "Just relax, to pass you need to lower your heart rate or beat the fear head on, with your recovery still in process I am going to limit you to one fear this time," he explained.
"Okay," I breathed, nervous out of my mind.
"You can do it Tris, I will be right here," he said, taking my hand. I felt the needle in my neck, I closed my eyes and felt the pressure of Four's hand disappear, and when I opened my eyes I was in Eric's apartment. I looked around not remembering what I was doing here. I walked through the apartment searching for him and when I discovered him he was in the bedroom, with a girl. I tried to turn away and leave but my feet were stuck. Eric was kissing the girl on his bed, I went to say something but suddenly everything went dark and then I was in a glass box.
I banged on the wall trying to get out and realized it was filling with water. I looked and couldn't see a way out. I screamed for help but no one was in the room with me. The water was rising quickly and I was panicking realizing soon I would be drowning. I got up on my tip toes and took my last breath of air before submerging myself.
Think… I looked around and saw a crack in the top corner of the glass box; I put pressure on it and saw I had made the crack bigger. I turned and kicked the corner over and over again watching the break in the glass grow, my air was running out but I knew I just had to force my way out. With a final kick the glass shattered and I could breathe coughing up water.
My eyes snapped open and I was back in the room with Four, breathing heavily. I looked at him and he seemed concerned. "Did I do that bad?" I asked.
"You beat the fear in just over 3 minutes, that is the fastest time by almost 12 minutes," he told me.
"So that is good right?" I asked, confused by his appearance.
"Your first fear was Eric, are you scared he is going to attack you?" he asked bluntly.
"I don't know," I shrugged, not sure how to respond.
"I skipped that fear, I didn't want you getting too upset but you will have to deal with it eventually and Eric will get to see it. If you can confront him and make the fear go away that would be better," Four explained. "I can help you," he added, lowering his voice, I looked up at him and he swept a piece of my hair off my shoulder. "I would never let him hurt you Tris."
"Thanks," I whispered, still feeling out of breath but for a whole different reason this time. I remembered Christina telling me I should just kiss him, he was so close it would be easy. "Four…" he smirked his small grin at me and then with a surge of adrenaline I leaned up and kissed him. It lasted for just a moment but that quick kiss changed everything. Four was smiling and I felt like my chest was going to explode.
"Why don't you come to my apartment tonight," he said. I just nodded not sure I was capable of speaking. He laughed at me and with that I got up and exited so the next person could begin their fear landscape.
After my head had cleared a little and my heart rate had returned to normal I began wondering why Eric had been in my fear landscape and with a girl. I was sure Four was wrong in his evaluation of the fear, I was not concerned about Eric attacking me, the more I thought about it the more I realized I was scared he would move past me, our time together had made me enjoy Eric's presence and I didn't like the idea of him being with any girl, not that I wanted to be with him though I was attracted to him, but he is such a nightmare…. I practically lost my mind trying to rationalize the fear before giving up and lying on my bed waiting for everyone to finish up.
"Let's go eat!" Christina announced once everyone was back. I jumped up starving. Once we made it to the mess hall Four was there, I felt my face get hot just seeing him after our kiss in the training room. I was surprised to see Eric. It was the first time I had seen him since he dropped me off in the recovery room almost 2 weeks ago, I was happy he was eating with Max so he wasn't alone. Half way through our meals Four came and tapped me on the shoulder.
"I need to talk with you," he said. I saw Christina smile. I got up a followed him out; we walked until we were in a dark corner in the hallway.
"Is everything okay?" I asked him.
"I have to go to Erudite with Max tonight, and won't be returning for 2 days," he explained.
"Why do you have to go?" I asked, "Shouldn't Eric be going?"
"I have a good relationship with the people at Erudite, shockingly they don't like Eric over there, things just go better when I am there," he explained.
"Okay, I understand," I agreed. I was disappointed we wouldn't be spending time together tonight but Dauntless business was more important.
"I want you to only do one fear in the next landscape as well. Tori will be taking over for me, don't push yourself too hard," he said.
"I can do more than one, I am recovering well," I told him.
"Tris, you need to just do one. When I am back I can help you tackle more."
"Okay," I agreed. I did not like all this taking it easy stuff but I didn't want to argue. Four took a small step closer to me and I felt nerves kick in.
"Just wait for me," he said, and then he leaned down and kissed me, putting his hand on my back bringing us closer together.
"Alright, I will only do one fear," I said once he released me. He grinned before walking away.
Once our education class was over we were done for the day. We all gathered in the pit to hang out and listen to music. Erin and Keke ordered a round of drinks for everyone. I politely declined mine as our last adventure drinking was not one I was prepared to relive tonight. Eric was at the bar with a girl and they were laughing and taking shots. As the night went on I was able to relax but couldn't keep my eyes from wondering over to Eric and his date. Around 10pm she got up and left, I watched for a while but she never came back.
"Keke go see if Eric will buy you a drink," Erin dared.
"You are on, if I get one then you owe us all another round!"
Everyone had been drinking tonight but at a much lighter pace I could see the effects of the alcohol on everyone's faces but I doubted they would feel sick in the morning everyone seemed under control. I watched Keke bounce over to Eric and could see her flirting with her body language, Eric seemed amused and based on how much I had seen him drink I imagined he was a little more than tipsy. We all watched as he rejected her, she returned with a defeated look on her face.
"Your turn Tris," Erin announced.
"No way, Eric hates me," I refused.
"Come on just see what happens," Christina encouraged. Everyone piled on but I refused not wanting to make a scene at the pit.
"Look he is leaving anyway." We all watched as he got up and headed out. "I am going to call it a night too, my ribs are pretty sore," I said. They all waved me off and returned to their drinks. I headed back to the dormitory but before I made it I was grabbed and pulled into a dark hallway. My initial reaction was to scream and try to get whoever grabbed me to let go, but I was pinned to the wall and met face to face with Eric. He had pinned my arms to the side.
"What the hell are you doing, let go," I demanded. He was really close, my chest almost touching his. I could smell the whiskey on his breath.
"You want me to take my hands off of you?" he asked, the way he was talking through me off, he wasn't angry or mad like I imagined he would be for how rough he was being.
"Yes!"
"Think really hard about this next question," he said, releasing my arms and putting his hands on my hips under my shirt. "Do you want me to take my hands off of you? If you say yes I will never put them on you again." I was speechless I didn't know what to say, I wasn't even sure I knew what was going on, my mind and heartrate were racing.
"Well?" he whispered. I just looked at him unable to respond I was so shocked I had no answer. "Time's up Tris." He reached down and picked me up off the ground, forcing me to wrap my legs around him, crushing my back against the wall before he kissed me.
The kiss wasn't like when Four kissed me, it was rough and demanding, his hands squeezing my thighs. My arms wrapped around his neck, I could tell myself I did it for stabilization but the truth was I wanted to bring myself closer to Eric. He moved down and started kissing my neck, I felt my nails claw into his shoulder digging deep the longer he kissed me.
"You can tell me to stop," he whispered, meeting my eyes now. "This is your only chance." I couldn't believe he was asking me, I didn't feel pressured and though he was being aggressive I found myself liking it, but it was Eric he was supposed to hate me, the man who was constantly attacking me who thought I was weak, the man who broke my ribs was kissing me, and I didn't want it to stop.
"You can keep your hands on me," I smirked. He smiled and kissed me again, harder forcing my lips apart. I could taste the whiskey on his tongue, the sweetness was alluring. He moved his hand under my shirt and squeezed me tightly.
"FUCK! ERIC!" I yelled. He looked at me and realized his mistake. He had squeezed me where my ribs were still healing. Tears fell from my eyes and there was nothing I could do to stop it. Eric put me on my feet and pulled up my shirt to see.
"I'm sorry Tris I forgot."
I was trying to breath, feeling like my lungs were collapsing on my right side. "I need to sit down," I said sliding to the floor, trying to think of any way to make the pain go away. I knew it would calm down I just needed to wait. Eric stood over me and I hated he was watching me cry. "Leave," I told him.
"It was an accident," he said, misunderstanding my intention.
"I don't want people to see us and think you hurt me," I explained. "I am strong enough to take care of myself." I told him. I saw him thinking, I reached out and kicked his foot, and he looked down and smiled at me. He nodded and then walked off. A few moments later Christina come running up to me.
"Are you okay?!" she asked, sitting next to me. "Eric said you were crying."
"He told you I was hurt?" I asked. That was very much outside his character.
"Well he told me you were crying and I should help you before he cuts you, tears are a sign of weakness," she said rolling her eyes. I couldn't help but laugh, like of course he said that, wouldn't want people thinking he gave a shit about me.
"I bumped into the wall and hit my ribs; can you just help me up?" I asked her. "I want to get to bed." She stumbled getting up herself and I was worried she was too intoxicated to help me; once she stabilized it was clear she was having the same thought.
"Why don't I get Al?" She jogged off and returned a few minutes later with Al behind her. He frowned at me, but bent down and put his arm under my legs and then behind my back, picking me up no problem.
"Thanks Al," I said as we walked into the dormitory. He placed me on my bed and smiled.
"Shouldn't pick fights with the walls, they are always going to win," he teased. Christina and he left and I just closed my eyes trying to escape the pain. Thoughts of Eric having his hands on me were the last things I had on my mind before I passed out
A/N This is the chapter I think everyone was excited about! I hope it delivered! Wait until Four returns for things to spice up.
