This a disaster; a horrible, horrible disaster, one that is going to cause so much pain and turmoil and... god, Kurt feels like he is back in high school again and he really hates that feeling.

"Finn, I'm aware that your apartment is a disaster right now and that you need somewhere to stay for the next forty-eight hours until all those cockroaches are out," he shudders at the thought of cockroaches, "but this is a very bad idea. It is a disaster waiting to happen, you know that right? You cannot stay with us. Brody can kick your ass from here to mars. I know you're pretty tough, but have you seen the guy? He's a dancer. Dancers are tough as nails."

"Calm down, Kurt. It is only for a couple of days tops. I won't be a pain, promise, and I will behave when I see Rachel and Brody together," he promises with a roll of his eyes.

"And what about when Rachel is here without Brody? He only stops by for a few hours every day, unless it is the weekend. Will you behave when Rachel is alone?" Kurt asks. He means it as a rhetorical question because he already knows the answer. Finn can deny it all he wants, but he will not be on his best behavior and not try and win Rachel back when Brody is not around.

"Of course," Finn says, but Kurt knows it's a lie. He doesn't argue, however, because it would be pointless. "Fine, you can stay. I'll leave Rachel a message on her cell phone letting her know you'll be here for a couple of days."

Finn grins, satisfied. "Thanks, bro. You're the best."

"Yeah, yeah." Kurt dismisses him with the wave of his hand. Just as he reaches for his cell phone, it starts to ring. He recognizes the ringtone instantly and he feels a lump form in his throat the size of a massive rock. He tries to swallow it down, but it works to no avail.

His phone continues to ring. The ringtone is Blaine's.

He manages to answer at the last minute. "Hello?" He sounds quiet, too quiet. He doesn't know why he answered. He doesn't even want to speak to Blaine.

Only, that isn't true. He wants to ask Blaine why. He wants to understand, but he doesn't think he ever will because there is no excuse for what Blaine has done to them. There are no time machines; he cannot go back and not have sex with someone who isn't Kurt. He can't erase the damage he has done and Kurt isn't sure that he can ever make it better.

"Kurt." The way his name leaves Blaine's lips so quietly has Kurt shuddering. It reminds Kurt of stormy nights and cuddling and whispered secrets. The memories are making his head spin and he has to sit to keep himself from falling to the floor.

"What do you want, Blaine?" The way he asks the question is harsh. He doesn't sound like himself. He sounds angry, but beneath the anger are traces of hurt and betrayal. He is hurt. So hurt.

"I want to talk," Blaine explains. "I want to fix this. I want to fix us."

Kurt isn't sure how to feel. Does Blaine think it is really that easy, that all he has to say is sorry and Kurt will forgive him? If that's the case, then he is wrong because Kurt can't forgive him, or at least, he doesn't think he can. He is not sure he can find it in his heart because his heart hurts so badly and his head is hurting because this is all too much for him and it is too soon. Th wounds are still fresh.

"You can't. It's too late." There are cracks in his voice as he says the words. Kurt does not want it to be too late. He wants to be able to fix their broken relationship. He wants the good memories to not hurt anymore. He wants to remember Blaine and smile. He doesn't want to feel so... broken.

"Don't say that," Blaine says and it sounds like he is begging. Maybe he is begging, but it doesn't matter. Nothing matters anymore, but even as Kurt thinks the words, he knows it isn't true. Everything matters. Blaine matters, but Kurt wishes that he didn't. He doesn't want Blaine to matter to him anymore because maybe if he doesn't care, it won't hurt. "I know I can't turn back time. I honestly wish that I could, but I want to make this right. I cannot lose you, Kurt. I love you and all I am asking for is a chance. A chance to make it right. Please."

It is not like Blaine to beg. Kurt feels some kind of sick satisfaction at hearing Blaine beg for him. It makes him feel sick to the stomach. He does not like being vindictive. Hurting Blaine will not make him feel any less hurt. An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.

"Why did you do it, huh? If I mean so much to you, you never would have done it," Kurt snaps. He gasps at the pure... hatred in his voice. He does hate Blaine, but not in the way that he hates his enemies. He hates Blaine because he loves Blaine and he doesn't want to love Blaine anymore. Loving him causes too many bad feelings and Kurt does not like being bitter. He wants to be happy again, but without Blaine, he isn't sure he knows how to be happy. For the longest time, Blaine was his happiness.

"Kurt, I-" Blaine starts, but he stops talking. Kurt hears another voice. It sounds like Tina. "I have to go, but can we talk about this later over video chat? Please? I want to explain, Kurt because I need you. I am miserable without you."

Kurt finds himself smiling smugly, but the smile quickly fades. The words make him feel good for only a moment. For just one second, he finds himself glad that Blaine is miserable without him, but now he feels awful because he has been feeling miserable for weeks now... because without Blaine, he is miserable, too.

"Yeah, we can talk." Before Blaine gets another chance to speak, Kurt hangs up and tosses his phone on the couch. He starts to cry.

He hears loud footsteps and knows that Finn has reentered the living room, but he can't find it within himself to care. He simply cries and cries and cries and he finds himself unable to stop. His heart aches so much, but it feels good to finally have the ability to cry because he hasn't cried since Blaine left (not counting that time when he blew up on Rachel for no reason at all and made her cry) and he needs it. He needs to let it all out because he will never heal if he doesn't.

"What's wrong?" Finn asks, but when Kurt doesn't respond, he just sits down on the couch and wraps his arms around his brother. Kurt cries on Finn's shoulder and thinks maybe this is what he needed all along.


AUTHOR'S NOTE: What is next for Kurt and Blaine? Will Finn get Rachel back or will Brody convince her to stay with him? What will happen in the next 48 hours? Good questions. I don't even know the answers. That's the beauty of winging it.