I don't own Marvel or any partnership with them. I also don't own Elmer's Glue. You'll understand in a minute.
VII. Magnets on the Fridge
Steve lay in his bed staring at the ceiling. He was feeling lazy this morning and decided not to get up right away. Then he heard Clint bumble downstairs and figured he should probably go down too before Clint uses all the spoons as arrows.
He entered the kitchen only to find himself face to face with Magnito, who was reading the paper. "Morning," said Steve. Clint just waved.
Magnito put the paper down and tuned his attention to Steve. "Do you know what day it is?"
"Umm…" that was a weird question. "The 7th of December, 2015?"
"Anything else?"
"It's Monday?"
Clint groaned. "I hate Mondays."
Magnito was starting to get angry. "Anything else, historian?"
Steve couldn't understand. What did Magnito want? "Um, Pearl Harbor day?" He asked shyly.
Magnito leaned back into his chair. "That's right. Pearl Harbor day. The day that the United Stated of Ameirca decided to join the Second War." And Magnito went off on a rant. "1941: Early in the morning, the Japanese fleet air bombed the United States' Naval base in Hawaii on the island of O'ahu and destroyed nearly everything the base had, ended lives and brought horror to the nation. But it also provoked the United States to take their revenge out and side with the Allies. It's hard to imagine now but 74 years ago, the greatest world power began its formation."
Clint spoke up. "Ooh! I understood that Hunger Games reference!"
Magnito glared. Steve rolled his eyes and strode over to Clint. "Can you try to be respectful for once?" He hissed. Then he turned to Magnito. "I remember that day. And I'll bet Bucky will too. It was a terrifying day. I can still see the explosions from the gun powder and the USS Arizona-"
"I already went to school!" Screamed Clint. "Grandpas!" They're so annoying! They can't remember anything that I've already heard a million times!"
Steve growled. He was about to snap at Clint when his best friend entered the kitchen. Bucky waved to the three and went towards the cereal cabinet. "Hey Buck, do you remember Pearl Harbor?"
"It's in Hawaii," Bucky said promptly while filling the bowl with Kix. "If there's one thing I learned in HYDRA it's my geography. And the fact Zaire can't decide between Democratic Republic of the Congo and Zaire."
"No do you remember December 7th, 1941?" Steve tried.
Bucky thought for a second. "Was…that the day I… met you?"
Clint fell over laughing. Magnito went on a rant and Steve sighed. Bucky's brainwashed memory was certainly annoying at times.
"Stop!" Bucky shouted. Clint stopped laughing and Magnito quit talking. "I remember Pearl Harbor! I was just kidding with you!"
Magnito used his powers to stick Bucky to the fridge. Clint face planted, his sides shaking uncontrollably. Steve didn't know what to think.
"This is gonna be a long eight days," he muttered to himself.
"Lemme go!" Whined Bucky. "What did I ever do to you?"
"You've insulted me!" Hissed Magnito. "I swear you Avengers are always trying to take off more than you can chew!"
"Well right now, I'd be chewing my cereal but because I'm stuck to this fridge I will starve. I guess I could just reach inside the fridge since I'm stuck to eat and eat that way but my feet can't reach the ground. I need my food!"
Clint let out a holler. "Oh my god, Bucky! You're getting better at 21st century humor!"
"Well I learned a little from you, Tony, Scott, Sam and Rhody," Bucky grinned.
Magnito growled at Bucky. "You shouldn't make fun of a sacred day!" He scolded.
"Cowabunga chicken," said Clint.
Bucky snickered. "I remember that! Remember the time you shot a glue stick at me and I deflected it? I'd say it was a "gluey" situation!" He and Clint burst out laughing. Magnito released Bucky who immediately ran off with Clint and the bowl of Kix.
"Cowabunga chicken?" Asked Magnito.
Steve let out a sigh. "Clint brought Bucky bungee jumping once off a barn at Clint's farm. Every time they jumped they shouted 'cowabunga.' However, at some point the bungee broke and Clint fell into the chicken coop. Then they had a glue fight where Clint was shooting glue sticks and Bucky had to dodge. Of course, Bucky grabbed a whole pile of Elmer's Glue and poured it on Clint then threw him back into the chicken coop. Clint was covered in chicken feathers for five days. Sometimes I think Bucky's not my best friend anymore."
"Eh. You probably still are but he might not act like it. You get used to it. Believe me. I have three kids."
It was late in the afternoon. Scott was showing Lorna some card tricks. Wanda was watching as well but she wasn't impressed. She could do SO much better than the stupid Ant-Guy. But she didn't wasn't to spoil Lorna's happiness so she kept her trap shut.
Speaking of traps, Bruce had stepped on Tony's Don't-Touch-My-Stuff-Thor trap. He Hulked out and began wrecking the city. Tony was forced to go out and try to calm the Hulk with Black Widow and Quicksilver.
When they got back Bruce was singing some Christmas song, the Iron Man armor was crushed into a ball and its owner was carrying it, Pietro had a broken nose and Natasha had a black eye.
"Had some "Hulking" problems?" Giggled Jane.
"Of course not! What makes you think so?" Tony said sarcastically happily. Then he half-closed his eyes. "Duh!"
"Mele Kalikimaka is Hawaii's way to say Merry Christmas to you!" Shouted Bruce. He skipped off and went back to his lab.
Suddenly Vision and Ultron burst into the living room. They were tangled in each other's limbs. "No it is your goddamn fault!" Snapped Ultron.
"If I recall correctly it is your fault!" Vision hollered back.
"Yours!"
"No you!"
"No! You!"
"NOO!"
Magnito growled. He put out his hands and Vision and Ultron were yanked apart and held a good room length away. "If you lousy piles of junk don't shut up I'm gonna march your asses to A.I.M and have them rebuild you two."
"What kind of threat is that, Magnit-OLD?" Ultron snorted. Vision kicked his legs, a giant grin on his face.
Wanda stood up. "No one dares make insults to my father!" She blasted her powers out and struck Ultron. Magnito released Ultron and the robot began doing the robot dance.
"Helllllppp!" Whined Ultron as he jerked his body around in weird positions.
"Jarvis! Drop the beat!" Commanded Pietro. Jarvis began playing the Robot Dance music. The Avengers watched as Ultron did moved he probably would never do on his own free will. Vision continued kicking, this time it was because he was laughing so hard.
When Ultron was done, Wanda released the curse and Magnito released Vision. "Oh my god, my back," squealed Ultron. He fell over.
"Bro that was awesome!" Shrieked Vision. "You should really go into one of those taken competitions."
"No!"
Suddenly Pepper burst through the door with Hope and Betty. "Hey guys! We finally made dinner! Did you guys do anything fun?"
The Avengers all looked at Ultron. "No. NONONONONONO!" Screamed Ultron. Magnito plucked Ultron off the floor and Wanda cursed him again while Jarvis began playing music again.
Watch someone do the robot dance. It's pretty incredible. And listen to Mele Kalikimaka. Hawaiian theme for this chapter!
Some proportions are off in this story. I'm just barely shorter than my fridge so let's assume the Avengers have a Hulk and Thor sized fridge. And technically Clint wouldn't survive a fall from the top of his barn. But maybe the chickens caught him.
Also, I'm terribly sorry if I just insulted you for making Clint and Bucky a nuisance when Magnito was talking about Pearl Harbor.
To the troops who lost their lives on December 7, 1941, we're all grateful for your service. Without your contribution the United States and the world, nothing would be the way it is today. Thank You.
