Damages
Chapter Seven: Deonerate
"V!"
Evey's voice tore through the velvet black of the night, rending it.
"V! Help me! Oh, V, please! Help!"
Evey thrashed about in her bed, her eyes streaming with tears. Her door opened in a flash of light spilling from the hall. V walked in, slowly, gauging her level of consciousness.
"Leave me alone! Stop! V, help me!" she sobbed, clutching at bed sheets.
V sat beside her, curling his fingers around hers. "Evey, be calm…be still…you are dreaming."
Evey's eyes snapped open and her chest heaved. Her lips parted as she breathed heavily, staring at him. "What are you doing here?"
"You called for me, Evey."
"Why would I call for you?" Her voice was perched precariously between confusion and anger.
V shrugged. "I know not. It certainly is curious."
"I cried for you so many times in the past, V…and you never came. I know why now, but…" She trailed off, sniffling and wiping her hand across her nose. "Now you have. You're just fucking with my brain."
V shook his head. "This is not the reality you left behind, Evey. This is different, and safe."
"How can I be safe with you?"
"You have every right to be suspicious, Evey, but I gave you my word. No more lies or tricks. No more illusions, no more smoke and mirrors. Just me, just you, just the truth." V's voice was soft.
Evey took a deep, shuddering breath. "I keep seeing…it…in my head. I keep re-living it, hoping for you, and then when I see you I'm even more terrified."
V rested a hand on her shoulder. "But the man I am here is not the same man who hurt you."
"You aren't two separate entities, V. V is V. You are you. You cannot be anyone else."
"Does it assuage your consternation to know that I will not harm you?"
"How many times are you going to say it, V? I know you won't. I just can't get those damnable voices and pictures out of my head…"
V whispered, "Tell me of your childhood."
Evey drew back. "Excuse me?"
"Tell me. Tell me everything. Every bright, happy memory."
"And then you shall give me fairy dust and if I think of these memories I'll learn to fly?" Evey remarked snidely.
"Only if you want to," V said seriously.
Evey sighed. "I don't want to play games, V. I just want to sleep."
"Then perhaps you would allow me to speak. I imagine my dull tones would lull anyone to sleep."
Evey shrugged, turning away. "Try if you feel it is necessary."
"Do you?"
Evey threw a pillow across the room angrily. "Does it matter? Does any of this matter? I just want to get some bloody sleep, V! If you're going to talk, do it. If you're not going to, leave."
V remained silent. Evey's breaths were ragged and hitched in her throat. She was crying, but he didn't want to admit to her that he knew.
"There was a time, long ago, when the world was not the place it is now…it was covered with lush green grass, so sweet and plush that you could lie upon it and feel it reach out to gently stroke your face, fresh with dew and clean with the breath of morning…and the trees would dance in the warmest of breezes, casting shadows upon those who trod beneath them, admiring their towering beauty…lilies and tulips grew over the hills and tors, watered by the warm rain and strengthened by the golden sun, growing steadily and in more beauty, reaching their petals toward the azure sky as though to embrace it…And the brooks that wound through this land were clear and fresh, aflame with the bright reds and oranges of the creatures that swam in them, so that you did not know if you were touching flame or fluid…It did not matter, because in this world there was no pain, no suffering, only happiness…Only laughter that sounded of silver bells and the sweetest music…There was no treachery or deceit…only truth…and the truth was, this place was the best of all possible worlds, to borrow from Voltaire, and in it one could do whatever one dreamed…Do you wish to fly, Evey?"
"Mmmf." Evey's reply was clouded by sleep.
"All you would have to do is imagine you could and you would soar…above everything, above everyone, and you did not need to worry, because no one could hurt you…and no one could make you forget how you felt when you did as you pleased…"
--
When Evey awoke, she felt as though she had been strapped to the rails of a tube station and run over repeatedly. Her head seemed to have suffered the most.
She opened her eyes slowly, feeling muscles she didn't think she had straining above her eyelids. Her room was lit by a single candle, and next to it lay a piece of parchment, kept flat by the thick brass base of the candlestick.
Evey commanded her limbs to move, and with a rather ungraceful movement, lurched forward and snatched the candlestick. The parchment fluttered to the floor, landing close to her, fortunately, and she picked it up.
V's spidery handwriting spoke to her in black ink.
Evey,
I have left for a short time only to find suitable food and clothing for you, as well as to restock several of my medical supplies. I shall return by eight thirty, at the very latest.
V.
She folded the parchment and looked around for a clock. She had been used to sleeping without a sense of time or purpose. Of course, there was an antique grandfather clock standing in the corner, mahogany and still. She squinted at it.
It was eight-fifteen.
Terrified to shower, for fear of drowning, or worse, Evey crawled out of bed, every limb aching. She couldn't wait to wear more than sweatpants and a wrinkled t-shirt, but for now, it was all she had.
She had gotten used to making due with very few things.
Opening her door into the main Gallery, she finally absorbed the richness of it; the crimson velvet curtains, the wheat-colored flagstones, the thick carpeting and glossy ebony piano. The colors swirled around her, as though she was seeing them with new eyes. Elegant Ming porcelain and traditional Zulu carvings lined the opposite wall, next to portraits of the nude human form, beside landscapes of the Nordic countries to the north. It was an eclectic mix, a perfect example of how many lives could intertwine and coexist, to live together in beauty.
Beauty was something she hadn't seen much of lately.
She nearly jumped out of her skin as the door from the damp tunnels creaked open, and V emerged, heavily cloaked. "Good morning. I hope you slept well."
He moved into the kitchen, and she followed.
She nodded solemnly. "I did, thank you." She didn't want to mention her shortness with him. The thought of it made the acids in her stomach churn.
V set a package on the table, a cardboard box, unsealed. "I found several articles of clothing for you, Evey, as well as some food you may find more palatable."
Evey sat at the table, weakly pulling the box closer to her with rough fingers. She opened it, the fine dust rising into the air. She sneezed.
"To your health, mademoiselle."
"What?" she sniffled.
"God bless you."
"Oh." She dipped her head in the box, finding familiar sweaters and camisoles, pairs of jeans she couldn't recall owning. Socks and, she noticed with a twinge of embarrassment, panties, were folded or rolled neatly along the inside of the box. "Thank you, V. Thank you very much."
"I was hoping," V said, a bit tentatively, she thought, "that when you made yourself more comfortable, we could discuss something important. I have something I want to show you."
"Ah. Your 'gift'." She arched her fingers in the air, quoting him.
V ignored this blatant display of sarcasm. "Yes. My gift."
Evey sniffed. "Could you show me now?"
"If you wish." V rose silently and moved into his rooms, beyond her eyesight.
She sat quietly, smelling the musty scent of the box and the familiar smells of her humble home, the clothing she once wore, lingering bits of perfume in the threads.
V returned, carrying nothing but a slim roll of very thin paper. He sat opposite her, and his mask was level with her face.
"Evey, please read this, if you would."
She reached out a thin hand, her bruises suddenly harsh in the light of the kitchen, against the white-gray of the paper. Grasping it, she realized it felt like tissue paper, easily torn. "Is this some holy relic?"
"Of sorts. To me."
She lowered her eyes to the paper and saw that it was written upon, in hastily scribbled lead. Or was it simply faded ink? She couldn't tell.
Either way, the very first words seemed to capture her, and she was plummeting into her own story…
--
V watched as Evey read Valerie's letter, trying to stay composed. This was something, some metamorphosis, she was supposed to experience alone. Instead, she had broken before he had the chance. The disappointment in her had been quelled by fear, and now resurfaced, replaced by disappointment in himself.
Why did he wait so long? When exactly was the proverbial opportune moment?
Evey's eyes filled with tears as she neared the end of the letter. She finally raised them to his mask, her gaze watery, but still unwavering. "Was…is this real?"
V nodded somberly, clasping his hands together, listening to the creak of leather. "Yes." The word was simple, but it fell with a leaden finality upon the table.
Evey bit her lip. "Did you meet her?"
"If I did, it was in passing and we remained nameless to one another."
"How did you get this?"
"She slid it into my cell from her own."
"Oh, my God."
V remained silent, letting her absorb the gravity of the letter, the poignancy and honesty with which Valerie wrote.
"It was meant to inspire hope in you," V said after several minutes. "Unfortunately…I was not timely in my delivery."
"You wanted to save me…"
"Always."
"You wanted me to save myself…"
"Indeed."
Evey paused, gasping. "I'm so incredibly…stupid."
"Of course you are not. You reacted as many would in a hopeless situation."
Instead of standing and snapping at him, as she would have, Evey weighed his words. "Yeah," she said softly.
"It is human nature to avoid pain, Evey, and to survive at the same time. You made a very difficult decision, Evey. While the thought of losing you wounds me deeply, so too is the knowledge that I had driven you that far. I am…ashamed in myself, Evey. And I am so…sorry."
Evey leveled her gaze with him.
"I honestly don't know whether or not I accept your apology."
"That is perfectly understandable, given the circumstances," V said, and suddenly rose to his feet, planting his hands on his kneecaps as he rose.
"Where are you going?"
"This is not the time for me to intrude upon you…you have many things I'm sure you'd like to think about and reflect on." V turned his back to her, but there was a hesitance in his step that made her stand as well.
"V…you really wanted to help me."
He didn't turn around. "Yes. Yes, I did. Unfortunately, it is too early to tell if I succeeded."
Please see chapter one for the disclaimer. Thanks! I'm sorry this took so long to post; hopefully I will be able to find my muse again and update soon.
