Wow, I'm powering on with these chapters. I've got so many ideas for this story because there's just so much that you can DO! Two sets of characters, two worlds collide and all that jazz. It's so incredibly fun writing the interactions between HP and LOTR characters.

As said last time, this chapter is a bit more serious only because, as much as this is a humor fic, there is plot as well so I have to introduce that every now and then. And don't worry, we'll get back to mini Frodo next chapter. And thanks for all the support!

Enjoy!

Gandalf paced back and forth around the tables dotted with strange silver instruments that were scattered around Dumbledore's office.

Seated in two seats near the desk were Aragorn and Boromir. The former was listening intently to what Dumbledore himself was saying, while the latter seemed to be off in thought. Gandalf himself, although having accepted that Dumbledore was indeed one of the Blue Maia who had vanished, was now faced with the next issue; how to return to Middle-earth.

"…and so it seems that Gandalf and I would need to combine our two different strains of magic and try to invent a spell to create a portal. Or, we simply wait and see if another will appear." Dumbledore finished, sitting back in his high-backed chair and gazing at them all with his piercing blue eyes.

"We have no guarantee that you will be able to." Boromir pointed out. "These portals sound like they are only created spontaneously, by some act of the Valor."

"And there is also the mystery of why it appeared where and when it did." Aragorn added. "I, for one, do not believe it was mere coincidence."

"I'm inclined to agree with you." Gandalf nodded in Aragorn's direction, ceasing his pacing and leaning on his staff thoughtfully. "However, though time passes at a much slower rate here than in Middle-earth, we cannot stay here for too long. A solution must be found."

Dumbledore's eyes twinkled. "I will send owls to the most esteemed spell-weavers I know of in the Wizard World for advice, without revealing too much of our circumstances. Perhaps a type of Portkey could be fashioned."

"Are you implying that these portals aren't the only way to travel to and from Middle-earth?" Gandalf asked.

"I am." Dumbledore nodded. "And it is another way that I will look into. However, until anything more solid can be discussed, I will advise you to continue to enjoy all that Hogwarts has to offer. Tomorrow is a Hogsmeade visit and I think you will all benefit from accompanying the students." He smiled. "Though it pains me to hear of Middle-earth's current circumstances, it is a welcome sight to see familiar faces and races. Especially the dear hobbits."

Gandalf returned the smile. "Yes…'dear' hobbits is true, but they also cause more trouble than they are worth."

Aragorn looked up. "Do not say so, Gandalf. All four hobbits have proven their bravery and dedication to the quest, even young Pippin."

"Do not take me so literally, Aragorn." Gandalf chided. "I am fully aware that if it wasn't for the quirks of each hobbit, our journey would be rather boring indeed."

A knock on the door made all four turn.

"Enter." Dumbledore called.

Gimli came in, slightly out of breath. A teenage boy with jet black hair followed, much less out of breath.

"Bloody stairs!" he groaned, as though talking to himself. "Send me over field after field or down corridor after corridor, but no more stairs." Then he looked up. "Pardon me, gentlemen, but I figured that the rest of us should know what is going on behind closed doors."

"Where is everyone?" Aragorn asked.

"Well, Sam has been taken to the greenhouses, Legolas is somewhere around the grounds, and the other three hobbits are exploring the castle. No telling where exactly they are!" Gimli listed.

Aragorn smiled slightly. "Well, Albus, perhaps you are right. The others, at least, are heeding your wish of relaxing and, shall we say, having fun?"

Dumbledore nodded in agreement to Aragorn, before beckoning to Gimli. "Harry, did you have anything you wished to discuss with me?"

Gandalf noticed that Dumbledore didn't look at the boy directly, but rather pretended to be focusing on something on his desk. He wondered why, although he did guess that this was the famous Harry Potter that Dumbledore had hinted at.

"No, sir." Harry answered, sounding rather put out. He quickly left, and Dumbledore began the task of summarising their talks for Gimli.


Legolas and Hermione were enjoying themselves during their tour of the grounds. Two intellectuals, two out-door lovers, two people who were so different, yet shared a love of knowledge and solitude.

At least, that's how Hermione saw it. Any students they passed gave them strange looks, but Hermione only glared back and snapped, "You should be helping our guests feel more comfortable, too!"

She was impressed and awed by Legolas' agility and heightened senses for, although she could accomplish the same effects using magic, it was quite incredible for someone to have them naturally. No, she wasn't falling for him, that much she had clearly defined for herself. She didn't have time for nonsense like that, especially when she knew that they were all going to return to Middle-earth at some stage. No, her interest in Legolas was purely academic. In fact, she had the right mind to begin to write a book on Elves.

To her absolute delight, once Hermione explained SPEW, Legolas agreed to sign up. He said that it had pained him to see the House-elves acting as slaves. Dobby, he admired, but he – like Hermione – simply couldn't wrap his head around why the other House-elves couldn't continue working if they wish, but also enjoy the comforts of clothes and holidays.

"You said Dobby has been working here for over a year now, yes?" He asked her at one stage. When she nodded, he continued. "Well, why has he not had an effect on the other House-elves? Surely they could see how much he enjoys his freedom?"

"I've thought the same." Hermione sighed. "I've tried to convince them of that very point, but they are just stuck in their ways. They all think that clothes and payment and holidays are akin to blasphemy when it comes to House-elves. I'm running out of ideas. At least Dumbledore treats them all well, though. The same can't be said for others. Dobby used to belong to the Malfoys. Horrid, horrid they were to him." She didn't wish to elaborate, only too glad that she hadn't seen the results of his self-punishments in as much detail as Harry had.

Legolas nodded understandingly. Then, in an attempt to cheer her up, he asked, "Have you ever used a bow, Hermione?"

Her eyes lit up. "No."

He smiled. "Then let us go and get mine and you can have a go."


Sam was completely in his element.

He was overwhelmed from the start by the myriad of plants that greeted him when Ron led him into the first greenhouse. From Venomous Tentacula, to Mandrakes, to something which took him ages to pronounce and was called a Mimbulus Mimbletonia. He felt rather like a child in a sweet shop as each new step revealed something new and exciting. He longed to take samples home but knew that by the time he got back to the Shire – he refused to think about if he didn't – they would have died.

He could tell that Ron just didn't appreciate natural life the same way he did, but he did notice that Ron tried to make things exciting for himself. He asked a lot of questions about the Shire and seemed quite put out when Sam told him that red-haired hobbits were almost an impossibility.

He approached the Mimbulus Mimbletonia again, sitting solitarily on the end of one table. He had already learned with some Bubotubors that touching these strange, magical plants could be dangerous and/or unpleasant; he was lucky there was a sink nearby to wash the pus off his hands. This time, being wiser, he grabbed a dead branch off the ground and gently inched it towards the plant.

"No, don't touch it!" came an urgent cry.

Sam pulled back instantly, turning to face the voice's owner. A round-faced boy stood a few metres away, eyes wide and hands reaching towards the stick as though still worried that Sam would ignore the warning.

"Oh, hi, Neville!" Ron said, obviously recognising the boy. "Neville, this is Sam. He's one of the guests. You're called a hobbit, right?" he asked Sam, almost as an afterthought. Sam nodded. "Right. And Sam, this is Neville. I'm sure you'll get along just fine. Neville's got a thing for plants, too."

"Y-you like plants?" Neville asked Sam hesitatingly, coming closer. Sam dropped the stick quickly.

"Well, yessir, I'm a gardener." Sam replied modestly.

"From what my brothers have heard from your friends, you're a bloody good gardener, and a bit more besides." Ron corrected.

Sam went slightly pink and looked down.

"Well…it's the only thing I'm good at; Herbology." Neville said quietly. Ron opened his mouth, but Neville continued. "So, if you want to know anything about any of these plants, just ask me!"

Sam nodded eagerly, glad to find someone else who shared his passion. Ron quickly realised that he would soon lose track of the conversation, so he excused himself and returned to the castle.

The two plant-nerds then spent the next hour discussing the similarities and differences between the flora of Middle-earth and this world. There were quite a lot of similarities when it came to 'normal' plants, but none of the species in the Herbology greenhouses were recognisable to Sam. Neville was more than happy to oblige in explaining about each and every one, in detail, who first grew them, what they are used for, etc.

However, their conversations were cut short as Merry suddenly sprinted in. He stopped, bending over and breathing hard.

"Sam…you've gotta…come…Frodo…"

All thoughts of plants instantly vanished from Sam's mind. "Is he alright?"

"He's fine." Merry said, and to Sam's surprise there was a smile on the Brandybuck's face. "Just…you'll see. They're waiting up on the Fourth Floor because that's where the Hospital Wing is, but Pippin thought you should see…oh, just follow me!"

I was going to try and write from Legolas' pov in this, but I just can't so I thought, rather than trying and failing, I'll stick to the characters I can do.

Next time, we'll see how Frodo will get turned back into his normal self. But don't worry, I'm not skipping his time as a toddler, I'm just not showing it till next time.

LOTCR: Thank you once again for your reviews. Mini Frodo is too cute, I know! No, no Gandalf in their method of revenge. No spoilers, hee hee. I pity you, give 'real life' a punch from me ^_^ Oh, and Aria Breuer has taken your idea and is writing a HP/LOTR crossover where Frodo goes to Hogwarts and learns magic. It's really good, check it out!

BFN!