Ichigo watched as Byakuya glanced at the blanket again. He'd been amused at first, like watching a little kid try to refrain from asking for candy in a candy store, but his amusement had died a slow death, chipping apart bit by bit until all he felt was frustration, confusion and guilt. God, so much guilt.
Why didn't Byakuya just ask him to get the blanket? It wasn't that hard, dammit! All he had to do was say 'Give me the blanket' and it'd be over with. He'd never been shy of ordering him around before, so what was so different now?
Ichigo frowned, keeping his head down and watching surreptitiously from behind the bangs that fell over his eyes. He saw Byakuya open his mouth and held his breath, waiting. He felt his heart sink into his stomach as Byakuya shut his mouth, a puzzled look on his face. He couldn't even ask for a stupid blanket?
He bit his tongue so he wouldn't say anything stupid, and not for the first time wondered what the hell had happened while he was talking to Zangetsu. The captain was definitely hiding something from him and Ichigo was certain he didn't want to know but dammit, he fucking needed to. He looked up, and saw Byakuya reach for the blanket at his side, his fingers twitching closer to it.
Ichigo grabbed it and threw it over the prone man's shoulders, making sure it covered his back before grabbing another one and pulling it over his legs. The other man looked surprised, his eyes wider than normal and Ichigo pulled a smirk to his face.
"Yeah, you were that obvious about it," he joked. He let the smirk drop off as Byakuya glared and Ichigo noticed that his lips were slightly blue. He cursed at himself; he'd spent all that time watching Byakuya try and get the blanket instead of doing it himself and now the stubborn idiot was so cold his lips had turned blue.
Why hadn't he thought of this before dammit? Instead, he'd just watched as his friend silently became hypothermic. He cursed himself, his hollow and this whole damned situation. It took a huge effort to keep his face blank and his voice steady.
"How long will you be like this?" he asked first. Because this was his fault and he was going to fix it and if that meant being Byakuya's freaking nursemaid until he got better, so be it. He just needed to know how long he would be away so he could tell everyone back home later. Ichigo frowned as another question popped into his head. If he couldn't enter the city for fear of being arrested, how could he help Byakuya?
He added the worry to his growing list of them, and refocused on the brunette in front of him.
"I should be able to walk in several hours," Byakuya replied, but Ichigo saw his hesitation. Saw the answer for the omission it was and his nails bit the skin of his palms as he clenched his fists.
"And when will you be back to normal?" he asked more specifically, the look on his face daring the captain to lie.
Byakuya stared silently before answering, "A month or so."
A month. He'd brought down the 6th Squad's Captain for a month, with what were relatively small injuries compared to previous battles. God, he didn't even know what to say, and he was sure some of his emotions had leaked into his expression, try as he might to prevent it. He startled as Byakuya asked,
"Kurosaki, do you have any idea what caused your hollow to take control for so long?" Byakuya asked him and Ichigo tensed automatically at talk of his inner hollow.
"Not really," he answered, although it didn't sound believable even to his ears. He really didn't know though. But he did have a hunch.
Of course, Byakuya was just as stubborn as he was and continued his questions even at the face of Ichigo's not-answers. "From what I have seen, you use its power frequently without it taking complete control. The few times that such a thing has happened only lasted a short while. Am I wrong?"
Ichigo considered him, surprised for some reason that Byakuya knew that. "No," he responded.
A lock of black hair fell onto his face, covering grey eyes that continued to stare, and something about it made Ichigo uneasy, though he couldn't place what it was. He turned his gaze to his lap, where his hands rested. They were covered in dried blood that he'd forgotten to clean after dressing Byakuya's wounds. He zoned out for a second, Byakuya's question not even registering, as he caught sight of Senbonzakura at his waist.
He didn't really know what had happened, or why, or even how really. And that burned at him. He had already decided to stay by his side until he was healthy again but Ichigo needed to know exactly what had happened. He couldn't let it happen again.
"-ened in your Inner World?"
He looked up and their eyes met, one gaze inquisitive, the other resolute.
"I want to know what happened, no matter how bad it was," Ichigo said, pausing to watch Byakuya's reaction. When he didn't give one Ichigo continued, "If you answer all of my questions I'll answer all of yours." Because you clearly have as many as I do, went unsaid.
Ichigo watched him carefully, for any sign of a change in that normally expressionless face of his. He saw Byakuya's eyes narrow slightly, his gaze intense, like he was truly considering his offer, but his eyebrow gave him away. Ichigo promptly went through his suggestion in his mind and amended it quickly as he saw the loophole.
"Of course, if you want me to tell you the truth you'll have to answer with the truth too."
Rather than looking annoyed like Ichigo was expecting, the captain looked more...impressed? Ichigo frowned. He'd never seen the man look impressed by anything, ever, and this wasn't really the best situation to be impressed by.
In fact, Ichigo didn't think he'd ever been able to read the man so well before and he frowned minutely. Great, he thought, more questions.
"Very well. However, we can choose to not answer two questions." Ichigo squinted at him. So he has at least two things to hide.
"One question," he said, glaring. Byakuya glared right back before giving a small nod.
"Since I have already answered some of your questions, it is your turn to answer mine." Isn't that what I've been doing? he thought to himself but nonetheless nodded for Byakuya to continue. "Why did you lose control?"
"I already told you I-"
"I believe it was your own condition to not lie," the captain interrupted. Ichigo scowled.
"Fine! I really don't know why, but probably because I...haven't been feeling-normal lately," he said haltingly. Byakuya raised an eyebrow and Ichigo looked away. "I've just been feeling sort of...listless," he continued, his shoulders slumping.
Ichigo felt awkward and uncomfortable and if not for his own need for answers he would have already ended the conversation. He glanced over at Byakuya whose eyes had a faraway look as he seemed to take in his explanation. That lock of hair fell onto his face again, hiding Byakuya's right eye from view.
Byakuya twitched his head and the black strands fell away from his face, revealing the dried blood on his forehead. It struck Ichigo then, what had bothered him about it before.
Byakuya was always immaculate in the care of his appearance. Even in a fight, rarely was his appearance so affected. It was strange seeing him messy and bloodied and then knowing that it was because of him…
Ichigo felt slightly sick as two thoughts struck him in tandem.
XxXxxXxXxXx
Byakuya thought back to the hollow's words.
"No wonder he'd been so out of it."
"Didnt'cha wonder why I'm in control an' there's no flicker or anything of Ichigo?"
"He might as well die for all you care…"
The words swam around in his head like waves, bouncing off each other, building and crashing and building again. Kurosaki's words appeared to confirm his Hollow's careless admission.
"No wonder he'd been so out of it."
It clearly had the answers he wanted but it had implied that this was somehow his fault. He had done nothing however, so how could that be?
"He might as well die for all you care…"
Byakuya shook its words off, pushing them back so they were not so distracting. The hollow had the answers they wanted, and Byakuya wondered if there was some way for Kurosaki to communicate with it.
"I was not aware that being bored constituted a loss of control," the shinigami finally said.
"Whatever. It's my turn." Byakuya frowned at the toneless voice. "What exactly did my Hollow do to you?"
Byakuya looked down his nose at him, "You want a play by play of the whole fight?"
"Yes."
The captain considered it. On the one hand he could lie, except that Kurosaki had somehow suddenly become adept at reading him and might not answer his next question truthfully.
On the other hand, he could skip this question and the grumpy teenager would know that something had happened during their fight. He wondered again if the boy could communicate with his hollow. In any case, whether he ultimately found out or not, Byakuya did not want to be the one detailing the…occurrence to him.
"I decline to answer."
Kurosaki blinked, surprised. He had clearly not been expecting him to use his only chance to refuse a question on something that seemed so simple.
The simplest questions are usually the hardest to answer, he thought darkly. The orange-head let it go however, looking a little…scared? Byakuya ignored it; he was curious but unwilling to ask about it.
"You clearly did not know what was happening while you were in your Inner World; when the hollow came out before, were you aware of what was happening?" he asked instead.
Kurosaki frowned in thought, staring at nothing as he appeared to go through his memories. "Sometimes I was," he explained slowly. "Other times I didn't remember anything."
Byakuya waited for more details and glared when none were forthcoming. "Tha-"
"So!" Kurosaki cut him off, and if looks could kill Kurosaki would be ashes on the ground. "Why are we in here exactly?"
Byakuya blinked, thrown by the question. "You would prefer to be arrested for treason?"
"Well no, but I mean, we can't stay here forever and even after you're able to walk, I'll still have committed…treason, so…why are we here?"
"Why are you so concerned about it?" Byakuya asked without any real thought, still off balance from this line of questioning.
"You'd be better off with an actual healer instead of this place," Kurosaki answered bluntly. "And you still haven't answered my question."
"It is easier," he replied, before biting his tongue.
"What's easier?"
"Everything."
Kurosaki gave him a curious look, scowling. "Is this how it's going to be? You give me vague answers that don't really make sense?"
"That is two questions, and it is my turn in any case."
"No, no it's not!" Kurosaki stood up, gesticulating wildly with his arms. "This isn't working; we're both too stubborn and impatient."
"So what would you suggest?" Byakuya demanded coolly as he pulled the blanket tighter around him.
His body was finally close to normal temperature again but outside the blanket felt so much colder than before. He had regained feeling in his right hand though, as well as control of his right forearm. His other arm felt practically nonexistent in comparison.
Byakuya checked the rest of his body as Kurosaki thought up some other game. Whatever he thought up, Byakuya would find some way around it. If he didn't want someone to know something, he was going to find a way to keep it hidden. We are similar in that way, he thought, as he wiggled his toes.
"I don't know," Kurosaki sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I guess we'll just forget the game thing and just ask what's on our mind."
Byakuya raised a brow, "Is that not what we had been doing before?"
Kurosaki plopped down next to him, his body heat a tangible thing even with a foot of space between them. "Yeah, but I wasn't really paying attention before."
"I see," he said as he moved his feet from side to side. The range of movement was not considerable but it was existent.
"So are we in here because you don't want people to see you like this?"
The question threw him off-again-and he ended up speaking the truth. "Partially."
"What's the other part?" Kurosaki asked, twisting his head to look at him.
"Everything would be easier if I was able to walk myself into the Medical Division."
"Why?" he asked.
A/N: Okay so this was supposed to be up weeks ago-I am so sorry about that! I know where this story is going but fleshing out the details is proving difficult. I have way too many ideas and they're sort of conflicting with each other and making it harder for me to write, which is also why the chapter ended so abruptly. I'm not really satisfied with it (actually the more I read the entire story the less I like it) but I decided to put it up before I completely scrapped the whole story. So yeah, sorry about that! The next chapter will hopefully be (better) up sooner.
All the reviews are greatly appreciated and I'm trying to reply to them all now that I figured out how to do that :) I hope you all enjoy the chapter (boring as it is)!
