"I guess it's my turn now isn't it?" Claire asked, taking a sip of coffee.

They had reconvened in John's living room. Claire had kicked off her heels, pulled her knees to her chest, her dress pooling at her feet on the sofa. John, opting for the matching oversized club chair, felt his chest tighten as he threw his legs over the arm of the chair.

"It can wait, like you said earlier, this doesn't all have to happen in one night. I'm not planning on taking off and from what I figure and from what I have been told, you are pretty much stuck where you are as well."

"That doesn't seem very fair John. I mean, you told me all about your dad…"

"Well you told me about my mom, so we are even."

"Don't you want to know; don't you even care?" Claire asked her cheeks flushing with anger and disbelief.

"Simmer down, Claire. You are about two seconds away from blowing a gasket" John soothed putting his own coffee down on the side table, swinging his legs to the floor. "I have always loved how you get all red when you're angry. It starts right above your breasts and slowly rises right up to your scalp, kind of like mercury in a thermometer. I always found it strangely arousing."

"John, I am serious."

"I know you are Cherry, I was just trying to give myself a minute to collect my thoughts" he leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees. "Tell me if you disagree, but I don't think it is necessary for you to rehash what happened. I mean Christ, Claire, you lost a baby; you were pregnant, something happened and you lost it. There really isn't anything else to tell. I don't blame you; I know by what I have already heard that you were devastated and that you blame yourself, why do I need to know details?"

"So you will stop blaming yourself" she stated, holding his gaze. "Ever since you found out that I had been pregnant, you have been blaming yourself, haven't you?"

"You do realize that I find it just a little bit creepy that you know me so well, right?" John replied, leaning back in his chair and closing his eyes. "Well let me tell you something, Cherry. I know you pretty damn well myself. For instance, I know that loosing that baby was the hardest thing you have ever gone through. I know that you loved that baby the minute you found out about him." Claire's lips curved into a faint smile.

"You said him; do you really believe it was a boy?"

"Cherry, I believe that you believe that he was a boy and that is enough for me." John answered opening his eyes to look into hers. "I know you Claire, like you say you know me and I know that you would have rather die that loose that little boy. I'm guessing that one way or another your mother found out about the pregnancy and gave you hell."

"She didn't give me hell that day; she beat me" Claire whispered wrapping her arms around her legs. "The doctor's office called because I had forgotten my scarf; Mother had taken the message and realized that Mills, Summers & Davidson, M.D. wasn't my normal gynecologist. She put two and two together and jumped me as soon as I entered the door. We yelled at each other, she slapped me several times, I tried to call you, I tried to call my dad and then I got a hold of Allison. When Allison got here Mother was revving up for another round; she saw Allison and absolutely freaked. Mother blamed her along with all of my other "new" friends, she kept saying that I was ruined and I had shamed the family" a giggle escaped her lips. "You should have seen Allison; she went off on my mother! Allison started pushing me toward the stairs and was yelling at Mother about Mother's love of all things alcoholic and about Daddy's affairs, about Mother's shallowness and snobbery."

John returned her smile, slightly wishing he could have seen Allison in action. There was one truth that became evident to all members of the Breakfast Club not long after their first detention and that was that Allison had become the matriarch for them all. Allison was Andy's anchor to sanity, Brian's medication to anxiety, Claire's grounding force for reality and John's leash to normalcy; and in turn, Allison was no longer ignored.

"She always took care of me whenever my dad got overly affectionate with the booze" John stated "and apparently she became your knight in shining armor."

"Allison had every intention of getting me out of there but Mother had other ideas. Somehow she got herself between us; she pushed me against the banister and turned to Allison, slapping her to the floor. Mother pushed me up the stairs and locked me in my room. To this day, I hate myself for not fighting harder, for letting my fear stop me from getting away from my mother. If I had just stood my ground, Allison wouldn't have gotten hurt and I wouldn't have lost the baby."

"That fear was helping you protect the baby, Claire. That's why you didn't fight back, you were protecting our child and I don't see any reason for you to blame yourself over what happened. You are at fault for not telling me about your mom and I am at fault for not letting you know when things heated up at home. The only person at fault for you loosing the baby is your mother. Didn't Brian say you were at the top of the stairs and in the blink of an eye, lying at the bottom unconscious? Did you throw yourself down the stairs, Claire? Even if you were fighting with your mom and lost your balance, did you intentionally mean to end up like a rag doll at the bottom? You didn't do anything wrong and you shouldn't feel like you did."

"John, why don't you want me to talk to you about this?"

"It's not that I don't want you to talk about it, it's that I don't know how to respond; I don't know what you need from me" he answered, his face etched with concern. "I don't know what role I play in all of this."

Claire placed her cup on the coffee table and rose to her feet. She approached John and laughed when his eyes widened, not knowing what to expect when she crawled into his lap. "This is what I need from you. The role you play is that of a father and you respond however you want to respond. If you are angry, yell; if you are sad, cry; if you want to beat something; let me know and I'll find something for you to hit. What I need from you is for you to listen to me, to hold me, to tell me what you feel. He was not my baby, he was our baby; and while it is six years later, you lost a child and it hurts."

John wrapped his arms around her shoulders and kissed her temple. He listened as Claire told him about her hospital stay and her fight with her mother. She told him how her father finally stopped using Claire to get back at his wife; how he chose to protect her instead. She told him of her parents' divorce, her trip to Europe, her loneliness, how she missed him and the rest of the gang. She let him know that he had never been far from her thoughts and when she returned to the states, she tried to find him. Claire talked about the letters that she had written to both him and the baby and the private little memorial that she had for their son.

"You held a service?" John asked surprised.

"Not in the sense that you are thinking; it was just me and Brian" she replied sighing deeply. "Brian was with me the entire ride to the hospital and until my dad showed up. Allison was pulled away from us by the cops because of her face; apparently Mother busted her nose. Brian stay with me; kept telling me everything was going to be alright and that once we got to the hospital, the doctors would stop the contractions. I told him not to lie to me; told him I felt the blood. He smiled and said that I was right and he wasn't going to lie to me. He promised to stay with me and that he would tell me whatever he could. I was terrified as they put me in the ambulance. I closed my eyes and tried to block out all the noise around me, waiting for the ambulance to start moving. I heard Brian whisper my name as he took a hold of my hand. He told me that the paramedics were positive I had lost the baby and I was hemorrhaging. When we got to the hospital I would be examined and then I would be taken to surgery for a D&C." Claire shuddered and drew n a deep breath. "I don't remember much else until I woke up in the hospital the next afternoon. I didn't see anybody until the next week. Dad had refused the admittance of anyone but him. Brian had snuck in." Claire let out a laugh. "You should have seen him, John. He had dressed up like surgeon to sneak past the rent-a-cop my dad had hired. Daddy was trying to prevent you from seeing me. He didn't know about you, about where you were; Brian told me. He said that Andy and Allison were going to try and see you but that they hadn't had any luck. Apparently you weren't letting anyone visit you. A couple of days after I was released, he came by to see me. I told him what I wanted to do and Brian got everything together. The next day he and I went down to the boat dock and scattered petals on the river. I told our son how much he was loved and wanted by the both of us. I told him that he was going to be missed but that he would always be with us and one day we would finally meet. I knew you didn't know, but I also knew that you would have wanted to keep the baby."

Throughout her story, Claire had felt John's comforting arms and kisses but hadn't had the courage to actually face him. When she did, she saw that his cheeks were wet and he was struggling to keep everything together. John saw the question in his eyes and he nodded.

"A couple of days after our service, Brian showed up again. He sort of panicked because my father had the house in a flurry of packing; actually he got a little pissed. He thought I was leaving and not going to let anyone know; he even said 'Claire, you are pulling a fucking John Bender'. He said only you could fall off the face of the earth while in the Illinois state penal system. I tried not to laugh but couldn't stop myself; that didn't help matters. Anyway, Brian had brought something for the baby. He had spent the past two days in his dad's garage and had made a headstone of sorts but he was so made, he almost threw it at me. We went out to that Japanese maple you and I used to sit under and set up a kind of shrine. Brian started crying, I already was, but he was still very angry. Turns out he was pissed off at you because you had completely cut yourself off from the rest of us."

"I was pissed. I hadn't heard from anyone. I didn't know it but the first couple of nights, the cops wouldn't let anyone in. They were dealing with someone who was 'looking out for my best interest'. To this day, I have no idea who it was" John replied sniffing while unconsciously running his fingers through her hair.

"It was Vernon" Claire whispered, "the cops had called him. He went down to the station and fought with the chief to keep you in the juvenile hall. He was the one who worked with the D.A. to get you transferred. He went to see your mom everyday just to make sure she was going to pull through. Once she was able to talk, he threatened your mother into telling the truth. She was terrified because the cops had found a sizable amount of cocaine under your parent's bed, which your mother denied was hers. They took it as intent to sell but Vernon got the D.A. to brush it under the rug if she agreed to a mandatory 6 month stay in rehab. Vernon laid down the terms to your mom, adding an additional 6 months and she told the D.A. what really happened."

"Vernon?"

"Yep, Vernon. Apparently you and your dad had pissed off to many police officers and they were not in any hurry to properly investigate the case. Vernon applied some pressure and got things taken care of as best he could."

"Vernon! The man didn't care if I lived or died!" John exclaimed.

"Apparently he did. We didn't even find out that he had been involved until his funeral."

"What? He is dead?"

"Yes, about two years ago. It was a really bad car accident. It would seem that Mr. Vernon often did things for his students, but he always did it behind the scenes. Allison attended the funeral…Don't ask." Claire stated rolling her eyes before John could interrupt. "The Chief of Police spoke at his funeral and revealed some of Mr. Vernon's escapades in helping his students. Turns out, you were one of them. A few days after, Andy ran into the chief at his Uncle's garage. He told Andy everything Vernon did to help you."

"Son-of-a-bitch." John whispered. "I never did anything for that man except give him hell. Why would he do it? Why would he help me? I mean I believed what he said in that closet, he scared the shit out of me."

"Maybe he saw what I saw then and what I see now; what you haven't been able to see." Claire stated leaning her forehead against his. "You were a good kid in a very bad situation and he saw that you would become a good man. And you are John; you are a good man."

"Cherry, we haven't seen each other in like six years. How do you know what kind of man I am?"

"You came back to me; after all this time, you came home" Claire whispered. "I have no idea what the future is going to hold for me…for us, but I do know that I am not going to let you go again. I have no idea what you plan to happen between us, but I do know that I still love you and I want, very much, to continue where we left off."

John's chuckle started deep in his chest, causing Claire to feel very stupid for saying so much so soon. John caught her look "Cherry, this is relief. I'm not laughing at you, I'm laughing at myself. I spent a good deal of time wondering how you were going to react to my reappearance. I kept telling myself that I wasn't coming back so that we could start over but I couldn't stop hoping."

"Thank God! You were laughing and I thought…I didn't know what you were thinking." Claire exclaimed, relief blowing out of her body. "I am so…happy, thankful, excited…I don't know the right word…but you have made me a very happy woman by saying that."

"I intend on keeping you happy for a long, long, long time."