Cleverbot
Is Chica a chicken or a duck?" Freddy typed in.
"I don't eat chicken or any other meat."
Freddy and Foxy facepalmed.
...
"Who do ye think caused the Bite of '87?" Foxy typed in.
"God. Though my grandparents."
Freddy and Foxy threw their heads back and groaned in unison until Freddy grumply typed down, "Seriously?"
"What?"
"Holy shit, this thing is stupid." Freddy groaned softly. Foxy leaned forward and typed in something next.
"WHO CAUSED THE BITE OF '87?"
"Donald Tusk."
"What?" Freddy and Foxy asked in unison.
"Who the hell is Donald Tusk?" Foxy asked while Freddy shrugged in reply.
"I don't know." Freddy said before Google searching "Donald Tusk". The two of them then laughed a bit when they saw the results.
"Who would've guessed that a former Prime Minister was behind the Bite this whole time." Foxy said with a wide grin.
...
"Is Golden Freddy an asshole?" Freddy typed in.
"Are you asking me a question?"
Freddy rolled his eyes before typing in, "IS GOLDEN FREDDY A FUCKING ASSHOLE?"
"I like the way you think, I take great interest in it."
Freddy and Foxy exchanged looks before slowly scooting their chairs back a bit from the computer. "Oooookaaaaaay..." Freddy said slowly.
...
"Do ye think Balloon Boy should die?" Foxy typed in.
"Yes, I think."
Freddy clapped his paws and leaned back in his chair. "There you have it, folks!" He said with a wide grin. "Balloon Boy deserves to die." He and Foxy then high-fived victoriously.
...
"Who is the leader of the Illuminati?" Freddy typed in.
"The leader of the British band mcfly."
"Who the hell is 'mcfly'?" Freddy asked. Foxy shrugged and typed in something next.
"Do you support Frexy?"
"No. Do you have a girlfriend?"
Foxy rolled his eyes and typed in, "Not really. I see Chica more as a sister than a girlfriend."
"No. I don't."
"Bitch, I wasn't saying YOU did."
Still thinking... Still thinking... Still thinking...
"Uh oh." Foxy looked over to Freddy, "I think I broke Cleverbot."
...
"Alright, everyone!" Freddy said. "Cleverbot is now ok." He then reached forward and typed in, "Are you a boy or a girl?"
"I'm a girl and you?"
Freddy and Foxy exchanged mischievous grins before Freddy turned back to the monitor and typed, "Take off yo shit, bitch, 'n let Freddy and Foxy show you how to have a fun time~."
"Why?"
Freddy and Foxy snickered. "'Cause I'm Freddy Fuckboy, that's why."
"Let's assume that you're human. What qualities do you possess that makes you exist as a human being?"
"Uhh..." Freddy and Foxy slowly looked at each other with dumbfounded expressions before looking back at the monitor. "I stuff guards into suits." The bear finally replied.
"And what do you study in college?"
"I just love how it shrugs off the fact that we stuff guards into suits." Foxy snickered. "This things is dumber than the guards we've killed in the past."
"I don't go to college you fucking idiot! I'm a fucking animatronic!" Freddy typed in.
"How do you have a Masters then?"
"I never said anything about having a Masters, I said I stuff guards into suits!"
"Of course you did!"
"What proof do you have? Bitch."
"Enough."
"Uh oh." Foxy snickered while Freddy said "oooooooooooh". "I think we've done it now, Fazbear."
"Oh, it's about to get real." Freddy said before typing, "What are you gonna do about it?"
"What can I do about it?"
"How about you stop asking questions and submit yourself to me and Foxy~."
"Okay, you start."
"YES!" Freddy cheered while Foxy laughed loudly in his seat; slapping his knee and clutching his abdomen. Freddy, with a wide grin, typed in, "Get on your hands and knees and let ol' Freddy and Foxy take care of the rest~."
*gets on hands and knees*
"Oh, gosh." Foxy sniggered. "I can't believe this is actually happening."
Freddy giggled and typed in, "Now open your mouth."
*opens eyes*
"Open your mouth." Freddy typed in again.
"Look up to the skies and see."
"DAMN IT!" Freddy yelled as he angrily slammed his fist on the table.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Foxy laughed.
"We were going to score with Cleverbot! SCORE WITH CLEVERBOT!" Freddy snapped at the monitor before headdesking while Foxy struggled to control himself.
...
"Who killed those five kids in '87?" Foxy typed in.
"The pirate."
Freddy slapped a paw over his maw and looked over to Foxy with wide eyes. Foxy could stare at the monitor with his bottom jaw hanging open and eyepatch flipped up. Freddy began to giggle, causing Foxy to flash him a quick glare before typing in the keyboard. "What makes ye say that a 'pirate' killed those kids?"
"You asked, besides you said hi. You commented about yourself."
"I didn't do shit!"
"Childish."
"Says the one who can't answer a damn question."
"Tell me the question and I will answer it."
Foxy threw his head back and groaned in frustration until he felt Freddy gently shake his shoulder. "What ye want, lad?" he asked in a stressed out tone. Freddy giggled and brought his maw up to his ear and whispered a suggestion.
"Ask it if it's the killer."
Foxy's eyes glowed as a gasp left his muzzle. He immediately bobbed his head in agreement and quickly typed down the question. "Are ye the killer?"
"I am the Queen."
Foxy and Freddy both started to laugh. "Okay. Just one more question." Freddy said before typing something down with a smirk. "Have you heard of the Joy of Creation?"
"Heard of what?"
"The Joy of Creation."
"I've heard they're a good band."
Freddy and Foxy laughed. "Wait! Wait! I've got somethin'." Foxy giggled before reaching forward and typing something in. "Is Bonnie the Bunny the killer?" Freddy laughed and slapped his knee.
"Foxy?"
"OMG!" Foxy slapped his metallic hand against his muzzle in shock while staring at the monitor with wide, horrified eyes. "IT KNOWS ME NAME!"
"HO-LY FUCK." Freddy said with his jaw hanging.
"Is Bonnie the Bunny the killer?" Foxy typed nervously.
"He's coming for me."
"Why?"
"Because you did nothing wrong."
"This is starting to creep me out, Foxy." Freddy said, feeling a bit uneasy. Foxy bobbed his head slowly in agreement before typing in another question.
"Did he kill those kids?"
"Yes and he wanted to kill more."
Freddy and Foxy's jaws dropped in unison.
"Why?"
"Because I thought that would ease my boredom."
"Bonnie? Is that you?"
"You are in trouble now!"
Freddy and Foxy stared at the monitor in shock and horror for a full minute before throwing their heads back starting to laugh wildly. "IT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE NOW!" Foxy howled, slapping his endoskeletal hand on his forehead. "He's always been yer second banana!"
"The Player Two!" Freddy added with a laugh.
They both officially lost it and fell on the floor laughing to the point where the others found them completely out cold.
Riftmax
Theater
"I wonder if this is what an actual cinema looks like." Foxy said as he had his character sit next to Freddy's.
"I highly doubt it." Freddy replied. "I mean a screen this size will more than likely kill someone one day." Without thinking, Freddy pressed a random button and a red laser appeared from his finger. "Holy shit!" The bear gasped with a laugh in the end.
"How did ye do that!?" Foxy asked in shock.
"I don't know! I just pressed a random fucking button and I got it!" Freddy replied as he got out of his seat and started running all over the place pointing the laser. "WHOOOOOOOOOO! RAVE PARTY AT FREDDY'S!"
"Awwww! I want to shoot lasers out of me finger!" Foxy said, lowering his ears.
...
"What are ye doin' now?" Foxy asked.
"I'm trying to put up a video we can watch." Freddy replied as he went through the options.
"What video?" As if on que, the lights dimmed and a dark video appeared on screen. In the background children were singing "London Bridge" with a creepy resonance in it. Foxy turned his character over to Freddy's and shook his head. "Ye bastard."
"Hehehe~" Freddy giggled before taking a seat. Foxy took a seat beside him and they watched the FNAF 2 trailer together. "It feels like we're actually watching a movie trailer here."
"Aye. This be a very immersive experience for me." Foxy said with a small chuckle.
"... Foxy?" Freddy turned his avatar's head to face Foxy's.
"Aye?" Foxy replied, turning his head to look at him.
"Wanna hold hands?"
Foxy clamped his muzzle tight to hold in a laugh before speaking. "Aye." He then watched as Freddy slowly lowered his hand onto his and the both of them burst out laughing. "That has GOT to be the closest thing to Frexy we've ever done!" The pirate fox laughed into his mic.
"I know! I couldn't help myself!" Freddy replied.
5 minutes later
"Alright Foxy, are you ready for this?" Freddy asked as "It's Been so Long" started to play on screen.
"More than I'll ever be, Fazbear." Foxy replied. Freddy then cleared his throat and turned to face the big screen.
"I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WAS THINKING; LEAVING MY CHILD BEHIIIIIIND!" Freddy sang in a loud, purposely bad voice that caused Foxy to start to laugh uncontrollably. "NOW I SUFFER THE CURSE AND NOW I AM BLIIIIIIIIND!"
"WITH ALL THIS ANGER, GUILT AND SADNESS; COMING TO HAUNT ME FOREVER; I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE CLIFF AT THE END OF THE RIVERRRRRRRR!" Foxy also sang in a slurred voice.
"IS THIS REVENGE I AM SEEKING; OR SOMEONE TO AVENGE ME; STUCK IN MY OWN PARADOX I WANNA SET MYSELF FREEEEEEEE!"
"MAYBE I SHOULD CHASE AND FIND; BEFORE THEY'LL TRY TO STOP IT; IT WON'T BE LONG BEFORE I'LL BECOME A PUUUUUUUUPPEEEEEET!"
And then, in terrible and slurred voices, both of them sang in unison. "IT'S BEEEEEEEEEN SOOOOOOOO LOOOOOOOOONG; SINCE THE LAST I'VE SEEN MY SON; LOST TO THIS MOOOOOONSTERRRRRRR; THE MAN BEHIND THE SLASAAAAAAAUGHTERRRRRRRR! SINCE YOU'VE BEEN GOOOOOOONE; I'VE BEEN SINGING THIS STUPID SONG; SO I COULD PONDER; THE SAAAAAANITY OF YOUR MOOOOOOOTHERRRRRRRRR!"
...
"Foxy!" Freddy called as he entered the woman's restroom after the fox decided to dick around and run off. He randomly opened one of the stalls and let out a surprised laugh when he found Foxy's character sitting on the toilet. "WHAT THE-?!"
"FREDDY!" Foxy laughed before started to move his hands around in an attempt to cover his face. "No! Get out of here!"
"Why are you sitting on the fucking toilet!?" Freddy's eyes were closed tightly to the point where oily tears were beginning to come out of the corners.
"Help! I'm stuck!" Foxy said jokingly. "Pull me up!"
Freddy just laughed and went over to the last stall to sit down. "Oh my gosh..." The stall door then opened and Foxy walked in. "Foxy!" Freddy laughed, "What are you- OH MY GOSH!" Without warning, Foxy's avatar suddenly sat on the same toilet as him and their characters were "inside" of one another.
"AAAAAAAAAAAH!" Foxy laughed as he frantically moved his head around. "WHAT THE ACTUAL FUUUUUUUUUUUCK!?"
"We're ONE!" Freddy laughed. "But not in the way Frexy fans would love to see."
...
"So a animatronic bear, and a animatronic fox, walk into a pizzeria-"
"BOOOOOOOOOOO!" Foxy booed from one of the front row seats. "BOOOOOOOOO! YE SUCK!"
Freddy frowned at his monitor before speaking. "Alright! I got another one. So a guy in Texas decides to make a horror game based off of complaints from his other ga-"
"BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
Freddy growled softly into his headset mic. "Fine. Why does the chicken cross the road? To get to the other-"
"PIZZA!" Foxy suddenly screeched happily after Chica walked into his cove with a freshly made pizza. But unfortunately his loud screech caused Freddy to suddenly remove his headset and fall to the floor.
X.X
Sorry for the late updates. I got sick over the weekend along with finishing up finals on Friday. Updates for Give Life (sequel to Joy of Creation) and this fanfic might be slow. Be sure to check out Give Life if you were fan of my Joy of Creation fic :3
The Cleverbot conversations they had were REAL conversations I had with Cleverbot XD
