Disclaimer: I do not own Slam Dunk or any of its characters.


Chapter 7: Letting Go

I finally set my heart to leave
And it came to me like a harsh storm
It might be a fate that will wash away like the rain


"That was a nice game, tousan!" a ten-year old, raven-haired with azure eyes told his father while they were walking out of a basketball gym where a match just ended. He was enthusiastically holding unto his father's hand.

"Would you like to be a basketball player, too, Kaede?" the father asked the young boy.

"Hai! I will be the number one basketball player in Japan!" the boy exclaimed with a glitter in his blue eyes.

"You should make sure of that, my son," the father with same raven locks and blue eyes chuckle at his son's ambition.

"I promise you otousan! I will be number one!"

Rukawa Kaede abruptly opened his eyes. It's just a dream. He stared at the white ceiling. It has been a while since he had that dream. Maybe because of what has happened last night that triggered his longing for the person he had cherished the most. Blinking hard he tried to shrug off the sudden guilt he felt of what he did last night to their assistant manager. Thinking, he tried to reason out why he did what he did to Akagi Haruko. He felt too guilty throughout the night, her crying face haunting him to his sleep.

Yesterday was almost a good day for him. When he heard about the team playing against Ryonan High School without him, it was fine, disappointing but fine. He can't do anything with his broken foot, can he? But when the last person he wanted to hear from called that afternoon, after Haruko has left, it was the last straw to his pent up frustration.

"It's you're mother,"Rukawa-san told the young male as she gave him the phone.

"What does she want?" he spat, he doesn't want to do anything with his so-called mother who abandoned him and his father for another man. The memory of his mother telling his father that she was leaving shattered the young Kaede's heart.

"Talk to her at least, Kaede," the old lady told him with a gentle smile. "It has been years. Just try to talk to her, ne?" But he was adamant. He can't forgive her for what she did; the wound she left was too deep to heal.

Rukawa closed his eyes again and massaged his temple. A headache came because of the memory. It made him more determine to be number one in basketball. For his father. He will not disappoint his father like his mother did. But the crying image of Akagi Haruko made him felt something he didn't want to feel nor think he would feel at all. Her tears made him lose all his defenses from the emotion he thought he has vanished a long time ago. Rukawa did not expect her to cry because of what he had said. He expected her to smile like she always does even though sometimes it was just a force one. The image of her crying made him feel guilty.

Will she come today? He thought while he sat up and gazed at the sunflower on the vase. She had come last night to give him the sunflower but he pushed her away.

-/-/-/-

"Haruko?" Matsui said, frowning at her friend. She has been spacing out since this morning. It made her and Fuji think that something happened to their friend. And it was by the time of the day when she's already frantic on going to the hospital to visit the injured Rukawa Kaede. But now, she's just sitting on her chair doodling on her notes and not showing any signs of going anywhere.

"Aren't you going to the hospital?"

"Huh?" Haruko looked up at her two friends, worry visible on their faces. "Sorry, what did you just say?"

Matsui and Fuji exchanged looks of worry and confusing.

"Did something happen?" Fuji asked. "You've been out of you self the whole day."

"Yep, you are not yourself today," Matsui nodded.

"Uh… yeah, maybe… don't worry I'm fine," Haruko waved her hands on her face and forced smile.

"No, you're not!" Matsui argued.

"Is it Rukawa-kun?" Fuji asked, tentatively.

"Ru-Rukawa-kun?" Haruko diverted her gaze from her two friends earning her more suspicious look from them. She can't lie to them, can she? "Hai…." Her voice faltered, remembering the night before. She stared outside the window, the sky was dark and rain has started to fall heavily. It represented her feelings so clearly.

"Nani? Tell us!" Matsui and Fuji chorused. Breathing deeply, Haruko recollected the painful words the cold-hearted ace player of the basketball team has told her.

"That was mean!" Matsui exclaimed after her story.

"Just when everything was going fine between the two of you," Fuji added.

"I'm thinking, maybe he has his reason for doing that," Haruko muttered.

"Haruko, I think you should just accept the fact that he is a cold hearted bastard!" Matsui clenched her fists in anger.

"Matsui!" Fuji eyed her.

"What? Haruko needs to wake up. She has been doing everything for him just to be pushed away like that? Our friend deserves a better man!" Matsui blabbered. "Someone who will appreciate her at least."

"I guess, Matsui's right, Haruko, maybe you should start letting go of Rukawa-kun. You can't hold on to someone who doesn't want to be held on to, right?"

Staring at her two best friends, Haruko couldn't agree more to them. They were right, perhaps letting go is the only option for her.

"You should try to look at other guys sometimes," Matsui suggested. "You're beautiful and quite a catch."

"She's right, Haruko, you have been just looking at Rukawa-kun all these years, it's about time you look at other guys. He's not the only guy around."

"Hai, I'll consider that," Haruko smiled at them. "Thank you for always being here for me!"

-/-/-/-

"Among the first years, I can say that Koizumi Keitaro can compensate with Rukawa's absence," Ayako told Miyagi and Haruko during the trio's meeting before the team's practice. Captain Miyagi called the two girls in the meeting room to discuss about the oncoming practice game against Ryonan High School. They need to talk about a game strategy for them to win even without their top player.

"I agree with Ayako-sempai, Koizumi is a good player, he also has the height and speed," Haruko added. "He can defend Fukuda so that Sakuragi-kun can defend Sendoh."

"No," Captain Miyagi said while scratching his chin. "I don't think it would be best for Koizumi to defend against a rugged player like Fukuda, we could put him against Sendoh."

"Sendoh? But Koizumi is just a rookie!" Ayako exclaimed.

"Rukawa was also a rookie when he faced Sendoh," Miyagi countered, smirking at the manageress.

"Rukawa is in a different league," Ayako muttered.

"Yeah, right but we don't have a choice," Miyagi uttered. "What do you think, Haruko-chan?"

"I guess you're right, Koizumi, may do good if not better but – " Haruko paused, thinking about Rukawa is hard for her. It reminds her of what has transpired between them.

"But?" Miyagi raised his eyebrow at her.

"But he still lacks the scoring that – that Ru, Rukawa-kun gives the team," she continued.

"You're right, Rukawa is our main scorer, Sakuragi is still struggling with his shooting," Miyagi agreed.

"Na…. Don't worry too much!" Ayako patted the captain's back. "We can get through this! Remember? We are a strong team!"

"Yeah, we are strong!" Miyagi cheered. "Yosh! Time for practice, I can already hear Hanamichi's voice." And the pumped up team captain strode to the door making his way to the gym.

"So – " Ayako eyed her apprentice who was arranging the stat sheets on the table. She sense something is up to her. "Why didn't you visit Rukawa today?"

Haruko sighed. When will the people around her stop bothering her about him?

"I have plenty of things at hand so I didn't visit him," she replied with a straight voice. Haruko is determined to forget about the raven-haired player. if she wants to start moving on, she should think of him as just one of the players, an ordinary player like the other team members.

"Oh, I see…." Ayako nodded her head but still looking at the brunette, suspiciously. Something is fishy. The manager thought. All she could do for now is observe and see how things will go.

-/-/-/-

Fifty-four. Rukawa Kaede counted his 54th catch of the basketball while he tossed it in midair and catch it when the ball returns. He was beyond bored just lying on the bed day. Sleeping is one of his hobbies but he has slept enough. He occasionally walked off his bed with the aid of crutches and sometimes strolled at the garden but it makes him feel more frustrated that he can't play basketball seeing some patients play.

She didn't come today.

Looking outside the window, he sighed. It has been raining hard outside and it reminds him of a certain brunette with an enchanting smile and comforting scent that always makes him want to stay close to her as much as possible. He then remembered how he used to make her sit beside him on the bed which was also a surprise to him knowing that he isn't really fond of having a company. He remembered the first time he smelled her scent. It was floral; it smelled like the spring when flowers bloom. Her scent lulled him to sleep every time.

What's wrong with me? I'm becoming cheesy!

He shook his head but when his eyes landed on the sunflower beside his bed, Rukawa Kaede could not stop himself from thinking about her.

I miss her.

-/-/-/-

"This is nerve-wracking!" Koizumi Keitaro groaned while they were having a practice game against each other. Captain Miyagi has been on the rookie's tail ever since they have decided to make him defend Sendoh Akira.

"Relax, you'll do well, ne?" Haruko cooed.

Thinking about it, Haruko also feels nervous not just because of the game but also because of the fact that she will have to face the said man. Again. Sometimes she asked herself why everything is not going really well for her. She is still on the process of forgetting about their own ace player, which she is failing miserably. It has been two days since Haruko decided to move on with her life and forget about her feelings for Rukawa Kaede but everything around her reminds her of him. She tried to divert her thoughts by studying harder and worker more with the players especially the team's rookies. She checks their progress every practice and collects data of other teams that they could use for future games. But whenever Haruko takes a break from all those works, her thoughts always comes back to the raven-haired guy. It was frustrating her!

And now, she has to also think about the other ace player: Sendoh Akira. Sure, perhaps the guy was just joking around when he said those flirty words to her when they met but what if he was not? What will she do?

"Rukawa-sempai?!"

Koizumi's voice pulled Haruko back to the present. She frowned at him but the rookie was not looking at her instead he was gaping at something by the entrance. Haruko turned around to see what or who he was gaping at. Her jaw drop a little at the sight. It was Rukawa Kaede. In the flesh.

Rukawa Kaede was standing by the doorway, still in crutches and slowly making his way inside with the aid of the other players all surrounding him excitedly, well except Sakuragi who was throwing profanities at him but was also obviously happy to see their ace player. and except her, who was standing frozen to her place, still not believing that he was really there. Nothing much changed into his appearance; he is still gorgeous and captivating with his raven locks and cold blue eyes.

Stop staring Haruko! She scolded herself upon realizing what she was doing for a few minutes and before Rukawa catch with her act. She diverted her gaze, instead focus on the papers on her hands, reading them, but the data was not really registering in her brain. She was busy calming the erratic beating of her heart that she didn't realize was already beating too fast after seeing the ace player. She tried hard to stay compose and not shatter in front of him. Mind your own business. She remembered the harsh words he told her that night.

In spite of the commotion that was happening around her, the cheerful welcome of the players to their sempai and teammate, Haruko Akagi turned her back to the crowd and blocked everything out of her mind. The harsh words Rukawa Kaede has told her kept repeating inside her brain.

I know that you were never mind mine

But why does my heart feel so much pain?