.

The world, was definitely very tiny, and also very sick in the head.


Chapter 6:

Misaka Mikoto has always been one to follow social norms.

It didn't just come from being born with a silver spoon, oh no, her mom wasn't exactly the classiest of a lady to live up to and dad was almost never around. It was the little things that she picked up from time to time from watching other people, like her mind just grew and learned with every motion, every interaction, although never with a purpose. Not until the day she found out electricity fired off from just the tips of her fingers and she could fry dad's favorite CD player dead if she just focused hard enough (and she did, papa did not sound happy on the phone when mama called him that afternoon).

And it happened, just like that. No tragedies. No life-changing events. Misaka Mikoto learned about her new little knack of powers in ease and normality. But for a child, so young and innocent and with such a creative mind, it was so easy to believe that you can take on the whole world if you just try hard enough.

Thus it was set. The excited little kid that she was threw herself into training after training. Until her whole body practically breathed out magnetic field and the CD player turned into a whole building that she could bring down just from a zap here and there. And for a while, it really did feel like she'd finally had the world in her hands.

But people were greedy and curious, like the ones in white robes and thick glasses. Especially those. They came with tools on their hands and promises in their smiles. She let them poke needles through her skin and draw out blood and if there were any questions or doubts – "Don't worry, Misaka-san. We're just trying to save people here"; "You're doing us a great help" – and she shut her mouth and happily continued on with her life.

But middle school came. And by then burned out coins scattering around had made people put a name for her and she was even more encouraged to give effort into homework with the same amount of work that she spent improving her electric charges. And everyone was so happy with her. Mom looked pleased with each grade report brought home and dad always sounded proud on the other end of the phone. The teachers were nice too. Everything was good.

It didn't occur to Mikoto anything was wrong, until sensei became nice, too nice, and only to her. And the seats next to hers became emptier and emptier after each day. And the whispers became louder; past stories became chirping gossips and the infamous Railgun became Tokiwadai's Ace. And her name finally became something to both wear and uphold.

It turned into a part of her, in the end. "Do great"; "Be good"…became a constant chant and they burned away inside, hanging on the mind and embedding on the skin. It's good to do this and it's bad to do that, Misaka-san. Bring back good grades; learn the rules; smile and be nice to other people; make our school proud. Just live up to your name – all spoken so easily and no one ever realized just how hard they were to actually do it. Her mind maybe slowly crumbling away piece by piece but as long as she smiled it was good enough. Because 'The rest are messed up. They're strong but unstable so you're our only hope. So smile, Misaka-san. You're our mascot. Our City lives up to you.'

So she did. Stuck rules to her head and painted morals as ideals to live by. If people want then she would give. Whatever they so desired. Until her knuckles bled and her tears poured dry.

Mikoto never thought of anyone else suffering more, until Misaka Worst told her about Accelerator.

"…The bullet fragments in his skull destroyed his computation, mobility, and language abilities. He was crippled, Onee-sama. That's why he has to be connected to the Misaka Network through the choker, because it helps him function again."

"And he went through all of that…to save the SISTERS?"

Worst was always the mischievous one in the batch. But the look the older girl sent her then spoke nothing of humor and taunt.

"You may refuse to believe what MISAKA said. But MISAKA lives with him so MISAKA knows. If Onee-sama is so doubtful, don't listen to his words. Watch what he does and you'll see, Onee-sama."

It hurt. So much. There was only a handful of people she held dear to her heart: Mom, Dad, Kuroko, Saten, Uiharu, Touma, the SISTERS (maybe a little more than a handful). And even at her best she still couldn't save them. He had to save them. Almost turned himself into a vegetable helping them when she didn't even know they needed help. And now too. She brought that wretched guy nothing but misery and bother and still he stood out to help. Today only served to prove that point further.

Thus it was that irony that helped her set up her mind. Even if her mind turned corrupted and her hands tainted with blood, she would fight tooth and nail to redeem again. There were people to treasure and to keep and they would never have to know.

"Brat, what're the hell you on about?"

Accelerator snapped at the girl, but her gaze never trailed away from the boy in front of them – who was looking every sense of confused and surprised.

"You see, it's a personal matter now. So please Touma," she pressed on, not even sparing the other Level 5 a glance. "I'd like to talk to Accelerator alone."

Touma blinked at them, as if not believing his own eyes. Accelerator didn't blame the guy. He was pretty sure his were just an inch away from falling out of their sockets either.

"A…Are you sure?" he stammered out.

Mikoto smiled at him. The kind that looked assuring but was definitely not. Accelerator would have laughed if his mouth wasn't half frozen in place.

"Yeah, I think I'm pretty sure."

"Okay. I'm not really following what's going on here but alright," then he threw Accelerator a glare – a gesture that the latter was more than glad to return the sentiment. "Call me if there's trouble though."

"Of course."

He nodded, but then as if remembering something, almost jumped in surprise.

"Aaaah crap, I forgot to get Index pizza. She's gonna bite my head off. Literally." He groaned in dismay, draping a hand over his face.

"Go then," Mikoto chided at him, breaking into another smile when the guy hesitated, "I'll call if there's anything, really."

Touma still looked unconvinced, but nodded nonetheless. Throwing Accelerator another doubtful look, he turned to leave, seemingly preparing to break into a run for the pizza stop.

"Tell Index I say hi!" she called after him, just because. That overly jealous nun brat needed a taste of her own medicine. It was a petty revenge, but she was slowly dropping her good girl act bits by bits already, so why bother.

The guy raised a hand in acknowledgement without turning around. Quietly, Mikoto watched him leaving and felt the weight in her chest slowly ease out, just for a moment.

"So"

The low, raspy grumble came from somewhere next to her left and Mikoto turned to face its owner. Accelerator's brows were furrowed and his eyes were glaring red.

"What the fuck was that, you little brat?"


The tattered mess from their earlier brawl from before was still evident in the vast space behind the abandoned warehouse. The smell of charred rocks was still faint in the air and there was a few metal rails plunged to the ground that they had to go around. Misaka Mikoto was walking in front of him and Accelerator was trailing behind, kicking a few rocks out of the way just to have something to do as his mind was preoccupied.

The girl had not spoken a word since when they were in the ally. She's simply addressed him to head to their usual meeting place first and he's grudgingly followed. He's debated shouting and possibly making a show of cussing out, but then what she's admitted earlier completely ruined any verbal attempts.

It wasn't like he never thought about actually telling the Railgun what happened. But what was it – their plates were as full as they were already. And just nonchalantly dropping a 'Hey, so your SISTERS got infected with a virus and almost gone on a rampage once but no worries I got that dealt with. Took a bullet to my head and turned fucking crippled but no bother' wasn't very…dexterous. Anti-climactic even. And the girl was already burdening herself up as she was. Him adding up to her guilt list was no less like leaving her to wallow on her own 'til the point of no going back.

They were sitting now, on an overused huge metal cargo box so old and rusty the molding smell was almost overwhelming. He's sitting at one end and she on the other and the whole picture just seemed completely baffling he probably wouldn't even believe it if he were the just an audience looking on from the outside. In his mind, the 'How's' and 'What's' and 'The fuck?'s were on the verge of bursting open, but he stayed quiet – patiently waiting for the girl, whose thoughts seemed to be far away from where they were.

The silence seemed to stretch on forever before she finally spoke up.

"I was 6 years old, when they came for me, you know."

It took a moment for him to understand. Eyes narrowing, he nodded and waited for her to continue, even though she was not noticing.

"They…They said with that kind of power in my DNA, I could help them find out how to cure paralysis, muscular dystrophy, stuff of that sort," she said, unblinking. "They showed me all the possibilities of this experiment and they all sounded so astonishing and amazing I believed them. Stupidly. Naïvely so."

"I never thought about it twice since then. Just figured I got my part done, the rest was theirs…I know I've blamed you on the whole thing, but I know now…if it weren't for me in the first place, none of us would have to even be here."

Ne, Onee-sama. What would you do if you find out there's a copy of you running around?

I think I'd want them to disappear.

"…So I'm sorry. I'm sorry for what I've done. And even though I don't think I can ever forget what happened to 10,000 of the SISTERS, but I'm sorry for putting you in that position," she finally said.

She didn't expect an answer right away, but when the silence stretched on and still no signs of him speaking up, she finally caved. Nervously chancing a quick peek at the guy, she almost winced away to see the red, gleaming irises staring straight back at her.

If Mikoto was looking for shock or anger, she's met with none. Accelerator was facing her, but not in the way she expected him to, but more like in the way one would look if she offered herself on a silver platter to them. No, the strongest of their kind was looking at her with no surprise, rage or contempt, but instead – with what had to be the blankest stare she's ever witnessed of the Esper.

"…If this is some kind of ploy to get me to warm up or whatsoever," he finally said, "you're doing a damn fucked up job at it."

She stared at him. "Are you seriously serious right now?"

"Me? I should be asking you that!"

"No. Did you not hear anything at all? I've just bared myself out to you and that's how you're going to respond to it?"

Accelerator blinked at the girl.

He was Accelerator – the one whose name was enough to evoke fear in at least a ten-mile radius. He's killed and gotten killed and still lived. This was something he's supposed to be able to weather through. And he had to, because it was the only way he knew how to survive.

Never in this life would he ever even imagine them meeting like this, listening to the Railgun admitting her mistakes and apologizing was just straight up incomprehensible.

But there they were now. And the girl, real and alive and impossible in every sense, was looking at him and saying sorry and it wasn't forgiveness but it was the closest he could get to redemption for the SISTERS and it just can't, can't be real.

What was he supposed to do now? This was so different. Different from those labs where they put tubes in his body and asked him to kill for a test run. Different from his house, his home (and he has a home now for fuck's sake) where Last Order would look on and read him like an opened book. He didn't feel tongue-tied, didn't even feel anything often. But right then his chest felt so tight and his eyes were stinging. The metal edges where he was digging his hands into were splintering his palms but he couldn't tear his eyes away from the girl. Could never turn away from calm, dark brown eyes. He thought his body wanted to cry and combust. He thought he ought to run away and curl himself tight in somewhere she could never find. Away from all this acceptance and apologies and the good she was freely giving away. Because this was everything that those endless, sleepless nights have been haunting him about and how could he live with himself like this? How could she live with herself like this?!

"You…You don't know what you're talking about," he rasped.

"No, but I know enough."

"Shut up," he growled, abruptly scrambling to stand up. "Just shut up. How…Why the fuck are you even doing this huh?"

I didn't ask for this. I didn't ask for apologies or acceptance.

I don't fucking deserve any of that.

The urge to scream was overwhelming, but he stilled himself, looking on in wary as the girl also stood up from her spot and dusted at her skirt.

"I…I can't say that I understand how you feel, because I don't and we're not…close, like that," she said slowly.

"But as unbelievable as it sounds, I know what it feels like to have the world on your shoulders."

She was facing him now, shoulders squared and eyes – dark and so understanding he could feel his throat constrict on its own. "Nobody should have to go through what you've endured, and I've only added more to your burdens because of my ignorance. Even now, too. So yes, I am sorry, Accelerator. And thank you, for saving them."

The soft flesh at his palms had already started to feel wet and warm from where his nails were digging in. He was staring at her and didn't know what to say, what to even feel.

But then her words sunk in. And it was like a weight was finally pushed off his chest, his lungs sprang open and his throat loosened. He felt light, light, lighter than he's ever felt. Even his heart was tripping along with half its usual weight, propelling him upright just to be able to stay steady on his feet in front of her. Of this. Of everything they've said and not.

It was not what he ever expected, but it was everything and more than he could ever ask for.

"Alright," he finally said.

It was short and inapt, but the girl understood nonetheless. The nod and the ghost of a smile on the curve of her mouth was more than enough.

"Although," he continued, titling his head. "How the hell did you even managed to find ou…"

"Worst. Accidentally ran into Worst while visiting a SISTER so I asked her about your choker. It wasn't hard to piece two and two together and she wasn't very...discreet about you too, to be honest..."

"Tch, thought so…Fucking bitch. Can't never stop running her damn mouth."

"Don't talk about my sister like that."

"You're not the one living with that hellion of a brat. You don't know what I have to put up with everyday."

"Oh right, we've just reestablished that, haven't we? Your life is very miserable."

"Shove it, Third-rate."


Kihara Gensei was a man who knew things.

You ought to, especially in his line of field. Stick a needle into the wrong vein and everything can turn into chaos. He worked with precision and accuracy. Moreover, he also studied, hard, especially when it concerned superhuman beings like espers and the limitless possibilities of powers they could preserve.

The world maybe acceptant of Level 5 as the strongest, but how could they know there was so much more to it than that. Here they have a boy who can control vectors, one who creates and wields his own personal matter, a girl who reads minds and renders people into puppets…and they settled for just a level. No, Kihara was not that dense and ignorant. He's seen what these people could do, and he's certain with just the right push, the world would never be able to stay the same with them ever again.

Even if that means he had to completely destroy oneself to achieve it.

The Academy City's hospital was no strange place to him, but to navigate around was still a meddlesome task. It's been a while since he last set foot here, not since that dreadful Level 6 Shift Project. It still stung to remember. The plan was good and precise. Everything was perfectly set up. It could have worked spectacularly. But no, some arrogant child had to come in and ruin it for him.

Never again.

The woman behind the counter looked up and blinked when she saw him, but recovered soon enough to hide behind a polite smile.

"Hello, how can I help you here?"

Misaka Mikoto may have succeeded in escaping from her destined fate before, but she's not getting out of his clutch this time. He's just a few steps away from the next evolution of scientific powers, and the Railgun was going to be the front line base for this, whether she wants it or not.

The woman barely managed not to wince when he peered down at her with a leer.

"Yes, I'm looking for Misaka 10032's room."


"It's getting worse."

Accelerator figured he has to be used to the girl admitting stuff by now, but he's not. The blank look he sent her way was replied with a defeated sigh from the latter.

"The nightmares. I don't know why," she shook her head. "I see them even when I'm awake now. You see them too, right?"

Well, he's been nice enough to not point it out in case she exploded in another emotional outbreak. But since they were at this already, "…Yeah."

"See, something's wrong." With me, but that went without saying for them.

"I told you this before, didn't I? You're not even trying to push them away anymore. That's gotta be why."

"But it just doesn't make sense. I don't know what or how, but something just feels wrong, nowadays. Like my body just can't seem to stay still anymore."

The girl was at it again – staring blankly ahead. Accelerator tried very hard not to snap to catch her attention like he would usually do at home. This was a different Misaka. A very weird, brash and impossible Misaka. Somewhere distant at the back of his thoughts, Accelerator figured he should start to appreciate the chill, mindless side of the rest of the SISTERS.

"What do you think I should do?" she finally said, turning back to face him.

If he were shocked about someone asking him for advice, Accelerator thought he had it covered up quite well.

"Damn brat, you're the good guy here. How am I supposed to know?"

"Geez, no need to get worked up," she blinked at him. "But still though, what do you think?"

"Tried thinking happy thoughts yet?" he scoffed.

"What?"

"Kittens, puppies, rainbows, girly shit…Or that stupid green frog? The hell do I know."

"Hey, leave Gekota out of this!"

"God fucking hell. It was you after all! Do you know how many times I had to drag my ass out of bed just because the wretched brat wanted to go buy stuff stamped with that retarded frog's face?!"

"We are not having this discussion here right now," she fumed hotly, ears suddenly turning a shade warmer.

"Suuuure."

"I mean it. We need to be serious here. This is important."

"Yeah, yeah. Nightmares, getting messed up in the head. What else is new, huh?"

We are, was what she'd say. But then that would come out sounding sudden, and odd, and he'd probably take it out of context. Hell, now that she inwardly replayed it in her head, the thought really did just sound wrong. Those gossiping girls at school were finally getting to her after all. Mikoto tried not to cringe at the idea on the outside.

"…You know, I think something is going to happen soon, to be honest," she said instead.

He turned to her this time, brows furrowing.

"Really, it's just a feeling. But I don't think we should take this lightly," she insisted.

For a while he just stared at her, contemplating. If this were just a few weeks ago, Mikoto would have recoiled away under those red, calculating gaze. But it was different now. The look he's giving her was nothing of contempt or anger, and it's a refreshing new feeling to drown in.

"Fine, I'll see what I can dig up."

Then he sighed. Soft and barely audible but she's heard it anyways. Mikoto barely managed to snap her mouth close before another apology slipped out.

He was turning away now, looking on ahead, and for the first time, Mikoto finally had a good look at the guy in front of her. The already unusually pale skin was turning almost ghostly under the soft sunlight now. There's eyebags under his eyes and from this angle, she could see clearly the sharp edge of his nose and the curve of his mouth. His albino hair was a bit longer than she's remembered, bangs swaying ever so lightly just right above stark white eyebrows. She never noticed before, but his face, when not confronted in a manic rampage, was actually quite young and boyish looking. But the look he always seemed to wear already covered away a lot of that. And it finally hit Mikoto, so sudden and baring she almost reeled back at the realization, how much he's actually been through – fighting for scraps and bidding from the world that took away too much to give back.

"Okay."

She muttered, wondering why she suddenly felt embarrassed. If Accelerator noticed anything odd, he only spared her a glance before turning away again.

"I…I should leave. I promised my friends I'd meet them after class already."

He nodded, watching as the girl fiddled at her skirt and smoothed down her beige sweater. Her movements were a bit jumpy and almost…bashfully as she turned to anywhere but him. Accelerator contemplated calling the girl out on it, but thought better of it. Girls were one equation he refused to do the math on, and the Railgun was not out of the range.

"Yeah, so…" she muttered, then as if deciding to do better, snapped up to meet him eye to eye.

He didn't need to look further to understand what she wanted to say.

"I'll contact if there's anything."

He's said simply, but she got it nonetheless. Giving him another nod and a rather awkward mumble of goodbye, she turned and walked away. Accelerator stayed and watched her leaving. And if his eyes lingered on the girl just a bit longer than necessary, nobody would have to know.

(TBC)


A/N: Character and relationship development anyone? (・ε・)

First upload of 2017 and things are looking good so far. Only just a few chapters left so bear with me~

Thanks for reading, favorite and following. Reviews are always appreciated!