A'ight, hia's da nex chapta. *drops the marijuana and pulls my pants up all the way* yeah, that was kinda stupid, but I just felt like being stupid. ANYWAY, I haven't been getting very many reviews, so if those who have already read my story, could please tell their friends and whoever about this, I would be so happy, it'd make Forte from Galaxy Angel's trigger-happiness look like nothing. Yeah, another stupid moment. Ok, here.


Chapter 6: Pizza and Dirty Little Secrets… or something like that.

At dinner…

'Oh man, it's a good thing you have enough food here to feed 2 under-developed nations, but you yourself can force yourself to eat very little, 'cuz if you didn't have all these mini pizzas, I swear we'd all starve more than those kids in Kenya and make them look like they've been brought up in Buckingham Palace'

'Yeah… what she said'

Oh man… yes, it was a very good thing that I had just gone shopping on Wednesday, the day before Itachi, Kisame, Zetsu, Hidan, and Kakuzu showed up.

*sigh*… anyway, we all somehow just managed to fit into the dining room, Zetsu went hunting outside for any wild boars that might be lurking about, while Sasori stood in the doorway, listening to the conversation me and the Akatsuki were having.

'Dude, good thing he's a puppet, otherwise we'd have another mouth to feed'

Yeah… we were talking about how to get everyone back to the Shinobi world.

Itachi remained impassive as ever, but there seemed to be a light air of smugness around him. I refused to meet his dark grey eyes for fear of letting him know what I was thinking.

'Oh, you dirty mind, you…'

'Not like that, Kin!'

'Sure, Kira, sure…'

When Tobi walked into the room after "getting lost in this huge house", everyone sweat-dropped at the same time, including me, but then stiffened when they realized what a serious situation this was. Everyone was itching to see his face, even Pein, who was the supposed leader of this whole organization. But, Tobi just sat down and shoved 2 whole mini pizzas in his mouth in less than 4 seconds.

'Yeah, like that's enough time to actually see anything…'

'How'd he fit all those pizzas…?'

"So… not even you, the most devout Narutard of all time, knows what Tobi's face looks like, yeah?" I looked at Deidara and deadpanned,

"No, even I don't know what Mad-" but was cut off by the guy in question's hand shooting across the table and over my mouth.

He held one finger over where I guessed his mouth was, using the universal signal for, "shut your mouth now; or I'll slug you so fast and hard, you won't even know what hit you" and flashed his visible Sharingan menacingly at me.

I turned my head away, laughing nervously, and started on a new topic: where everyone would be sleeping tonight.

"I'm staying with Konan!" was an unexpected outburst from- Pein?

'Since when does Pein have outbursts?'

'I don't know…'

He immediately grabbed Konan's arm and pulled her closer to him.

'Oh yeah…'

I grinned at them.

'Hm…?'

'Oh man, I hope there won't be a bunch of little Peins and Konans running around later…'

'Dude, do you know how hilarious that would be?'

'No, I don't.'

'Aw, you're no fun…'

and the couple turned redder than a Pokèball-

'Yes, I am a former Pokèfreak'

-but Pein kept a firm grip on his "supposed" lover's arm.

"Ok, I guess you can stay in my parents' room… what about everyone else?"

We have a bunch of futons from whoever it was that used to live in this house.

"I got dibs on the couch"

"Ok, Kisame has the couch… Tobi?"

"Ooh! Tobi wants the room upstairs!"

"Uh… which room would that be…?"

"The room with all the cute little stuffed animals!"

"Uh… which room would that be…?"

Both of my little sister's AND brother's rooms have stuffed animals… all over the place. He gave me a blank look.

"Tobi! Show her the room you wanna stay in, un!" barked an annoyed Deidara.

"Oh, ok!"

And the insanely childish who-knows-how-many-decades-old man sprinted out of the dining room, up the dangerously steep stairs, dragging me along, and stopped in front of my sister's room. He turned towards me, let out an excited squeak, which led me to believe that he was grinning from ear to ear underneath that ridiculous lollipop mask of his, and ran into the dark room.

'Geez, the old man wants to stay here?'

'*sigh* yes, I suppose so…'

'He's more deranged than I thought…'

Psh, got that, right, Kin.

To my surprise, Tobi pulled me in with him, and shut the door.

'He shut it.'

'Yikes! What's he gonna do?!'

'I dunno… *shudder*'

Then pressed me against the closed door.

I guessed that he had taken his mask off all the way, I couldn't be sure because the light wasn't on, but when I felt his breath against my neck, I figured that at least the bottom half was uncovered. I did my best not to shiver, but you would not believe how difficult that is.

He held one hand over my neck against the door, threatening to push harder if needed, his other hand resting on my waist. I could see one Sharingan eye staring down at me.

Yes, down at me.

'You idiot, why'd you wear a tank top?'

'I didn't feel like over-heating in the middle of the night! And besides, he can't see in the dark! The Sharingan can't do that! Or, the normal one can't anyway...'

'Whatever…'

"How much do you know…?" a deep, but quiet voice whispered into my ear, almost- what was that?

'Seductively?'

'*passes out*'

'Geez, Kira, you really are weaker than Hinata…'

Anyway, back to Mr. Pedophile. I didn't want anything to do with the guy, so I just simply said,

"Everything… Madara" and stared straight into his Kekkei Genkai, seriously freaked out at what might happen.

"Is that so…?" he quietly asked, brushing his cheek against mine.

"Yes, the Moon's Eye Plan, the summoning of the 9-Tails and its attack on Konoha, your brother Izuna, everything" I told him.

"Hm…? Who would think that such a young girl would know so much, hm?" Madara let go of my neck, but on the word 'young', he ran his knuckles down past my collarbone, just stopping where my shirt started. I shivered, making him chuckle darkly, lean in closer and ask in an even quieter voice,

"You won't tell anyone… will you?" and did the most disturbing thing ever. He bit my neck. I shuddered and turned away.

'Being bit by a guy that's like, 5 times your age and more evil than Darth Vader, the Joker, and Mojo-Jojo (and, no, I do not watch Power-Puff Girls anymore) combined is sooo freaky!'

'*still out cold*'

'*sweat drops*…'

The guys and girl downstairs thought that it was kind of taking a while just to show Tobi where he was sleeping, so they sent Deidara up to check on us. He saw that my sister's room's door was shut, got really suspicious and opened the door really slowly. Madara pulled me away and slid his mask back on, instantly returning to "Tobi Mode".

"Uh… what were you guys doing, yeah…?" his partner hesitantly asked. Nah, crap, he probably thought we were in the middle of some steamy make out session or some other Icha-Icha-worthy material like that.

"Tobi was just showing Hii-Chan the way that the stuffed animals' eyes glowed in the dark!"

I was amazed by how fast the fool could make up an excuse. I was also a little annoyed by the informality he used with my name, using the first syllable only, and we're not even close!

Ok, so, he was messing with me, but that doesn't mean that I liked it! Deidara also seemed to notice the change, and I shrugged at him.

"Ok… well, everyone wants to know where they're sleeping, so come down, un."

I readily agreed and jumped down the Perilous Stairs of Despair-

'That wasn't supposed to rhyme…'

-nearly breaking my face on the very last step. Seriously, those stairs are at like, a 48 degree angle, which is very steep, mind you.

'Thank Jashin Deidara saved us!'

'Yes, I do believe my respect for Deidara has risen significantly.'

'Remind me to glomp him later.'

'Will do.'

'Over and out.'

I came back to the dining room, my blonde savior behind me; Tobi skipped in after us and announced to the room at large that the stuffed animals' eyes glowed.

That was followed by an awkward silence.

I re-started the subject of sleeping space. After another 5 minutes of people arguing with each other, we finally agreed on rooms and who would be sharing with whom. I disappeared into the living room and started watching the Rookie 9 repeatedly get their butts kicked by a mostly transformed Sora.

Everyone else followed suit, settling in different spots around the room.

It was hard not to notice the tension building between the 2 males on either side of me. Deidara was glaring kunai at Itachi every chance that he got, while the other retained his unemotional mask, but you could tell that he was not enjoying the blonde's company.

'Now I know what it feels like to be Ai from Y.M.B.E.F.Y……….'

'Did you have to bring up another author's story? Oh yeah, you're in debt to Deidara'

Oh yeah. I was starting to feel the after effects of the earlier brawl from today, so I made sure that when I fell asleep, I leaned on Deidara, instead of Itachi.

I could've sworn the temperature dropped 10 degrees.

Celsius.

But, I let the matter drop and snuggled into Deidara's arm.


Yeah, I added some Deidara fluff in there, but hey, Itachi got a bunch of it in the past who knows how many chapters. Yeah, this chapter is kinda creepy, with Tobi/Madara screwing around, literally, in it. *sigh* Review please. Cycle of Awesomeness, everyone. Flame me, and I use RasenShuriken.
Kakuzu: yikes........
...... my point. Thanks!
-InsaneNarutard0111