Chapter Seven
The light that filtered in through the tent was hazy, smoky from all the fires, yet comforting with the smells of all sorts of exotic food and muffled laughter. How long she had been laying there taking it all in, Avi wasn't sure. It was recharging her. Comfort. How long would it be til she felt at home somewhere again? This wouldn't be it, and was only a temporary stop on the road. Duncan hadn't said where they were headed, but she knew that it would likely be a long way from here.
Her bare feet stuck out from under the blanket, too warm in the afternoon heat. Avi had gotten sleep, but it was restless. Alistair had mentioned dreams, but he had not told her there would be twisted figures in them, demons and darkness that crouched in the corners of her mind, waiting to pounce and drag her away. Her body shuddered in response to the trauma she had to fight through just to get a few scraps of fitful slumber. Maybe this was just a side effect of what she had seen over this short amount of time.
As if he had heard his name in her mind, Alistair came tramping through the tent cover. Avi glanced over from her pillow. Her companion seemed a bit surprised to see her awake, but he smiled and sat down on the cot opposite her.
"Well now. How did your beauty sleep go?" He asked.
Avi groaned, burying her face back in the pillow. "Not well." She glanced back over at him, tucking her wayward hair behind her ear. "Is it normal for new recruits to have intense nightmares, or am I just a special case?"
"I guess we should have warned you. You will have nightmares, yes. It's normal for Wardens of all stages, though it's more common during a Blight, especially when the Archdemon is close." He rubbed the back of his neck. "It's not the only time you have terrible dreams, but that is better saved for a later date. You will learn everything when we aren't pressed for time and in the middle of a battle. Now," He motioned toward a chest at the far end of the tent. "It's not a pleasant topic, but all of the items that were not personal of Daveth and Jory's are in the trunk and are there for you to use. I suggest that you stock up your bag and make sure that you have what you need."
"Alistair…" She sat up, staring at the trunk for a moment, then drew her knees to her chest, fingers tucked between her toes. "Is it common for recruits to die during the Joining like that? That had to be the most agonizing death, I would imagine…" Avi shivered in disgust. The way her companion had writhed in pain and screamed out with his last breaths was agonizing for everyone. She was going to miss Daveth; they had been getting to a comfortable state with each other, and she at least felt that she would have a friend for the time being.
"Not every time, no. Sometimes we have small Joinings, sometimes we have larger ones, like yours was. Usually there aren't as many deaths. It just depends. The thing is, with a Joining and the Taint, your body and blood has to be strong enough to handle the Darkspawn blood. If you aren't, then your body rejects it, and death is all that is left. That is why there are occasions that we take in people that have already been tainted with the Darkspawn blood. It's a slower death when it's taken in through the bloodstream, but it's still just as painful." He looked weary.
"I guess there isn't much that can be done about it then." Avi unfolded herself from the cot and stood up. She was wearing only a small shift, barely grazing the top of her knees, and Alistair glanced away, cheeks scarlet. It was unusual. "What a becoming shade." The teasing tone in her voice made his head snap up, then away from her again.
"Not fair! I was brought up in the Chantry, so I haven't been raised…quite like other men." He cleared his throat. "There are some clothes for you back behind the curtain, Avianna. Duncan had them brought in for you earlier." He stood up and began to walk out of the tent. "If you need me, I will be outside. There is food and plenty of it. I know that Duncan wanted to see you, but I suggest eating first. You are going to need your strength before the meeting, and I know it's less than proper to communicate with a belly rumble during a meeting with the king…trust me." The words held weight as if he knew from personal experience, and she had no doubt that it was true.
Avianna peeked over the edge of the curtain that had been strung up, perfect for changing behind. Her companion was leaving, though she was a bit sad to be left on her own once more. It seemed that that was becoming a trend more and more lately. But, that was something Duncan had warned her about, and she was just going to have to get used to it.
A few moments later, Avi wandered out of the tent, dressed in some of the soft clothing that was typically worn under the armor. Her curls had come tumbling loose and, for the first time in a number of days, she had no desire to contain it. Fang padded after her through the camp with his stump of a tail waggling this way and that. A quick meal for both and they headed off for the stairway that Duncan had indicated.
What was to be in this meeting? She wasn't sure. Duncan had been rather cryptic about it, and though she had been involved in many diplomatic meetings with her father, she hadn't been in anything that was strategic of this magnitude. Small war meetings and planning so that she would know strategy for protecting Highever Castle when she needed to, but it seemed that now those times would never come.
A table was spread out at the far end of the bottom of the ramp. The top was covered in maps and scribbles of papers, pens and stubs of pencils strewn all over. Two men were hunched over one side, pointing at various spots on a map and muttering to each other. Cailan was one of them, the other one she stiffened when his voice raked over her ears. Loghain Mac Tir: the king's father-in-law, second in command, and regent. Avianna had met him on a few occasions in court, but it was highly unpleasant on her end. They had danced, talked, and carried on as if things were just fine, as they always were in the court. Things were always perfect there. Here was another story.
Duncan nodded at her, his brow crossed together in a displeased fashion. The voices grew louder as she drew closer, standing beside her Commander on the opposite side of the table.
"No, Loghain, my decision on this is final, and as your king, you would do well to listen to me!" Cailan's voice was sharp as he slammed his fist down on the table. The two men glowered at each other, noses mere inches from each other. "I refuse to not have the Grey Wardens in this assault! They are an invaluable resource that needs to be used."
"You are a fool, boy. You are risking too much by having them in the army with you. There is no reason for them, and you know it." Loghain flourished his hand in the air, turning away from the king. "Besides, you want to play at hero, and this is no time for games. The darkspawn horde is too dangerous for that. You need to strengthen the front line with more of the army, not Wardens." He sneered at Duncan.
Duncan glowered back at the man, both of them obviously not fond of each other. It made Avianna uncomfortable, and she wished that she had some of her former recruits beside her. Sadly, she was alone, and the feeling settled in the base of her skull like a lead weight.
Cailan became snarky. "Oh, very well then. Perhaps we should wait for the Orlesian forces to join us before beginning the fight!" This made Loghain's head snap back to attention. The regent's eyes narrowed dangerously. It was no secret that he bore no love for the Orlesians, as he was the hero of the war that had helped Cailan's father drive out the Orlesian forces back thirty years ago. He was no stranger to the dangers and weavings of war.
"And again I stand by my protests that we do not need the Orlesians to defend ourselves. Fereldans have always been able to stand on their own two feet, and I don't see why this would change now." Loghain retorted.
"I don't see it as a fool notion at all. I see you as being foolish for not recognizing the opportunity to unite the southern part of Thedas. This is a huge chance to bring two political entities together in a chance for peace, despite it being a time of war. If we can come together in this, then we can come together at the peace table. Our arguments would be a thing of the past and we could step forward into a much brighter future. You will do well to remember that it is I who sits on the throne, not you." It was times like this when Avi could see where Cailan was truly a progressive, better king for this day and age, and she felt a surge of pride for getting to play a part in this small scene of history.
Loghain growled at the young man. "How fortunate that Maric did not live to see his son so eager to hand over the kingdom to the Orlesians, those who enslaved us for over a century, in case you had forgotten. I don't see why you are so willing to forget those trespasses against us, boy."
Duncan was pinching the bridge of his nose, and all Avianna could do was stare from the maps to her boots. It was so unpleasant to be standing here, watching the two of them argue and fuss at each other, but what else could they do? Her stomach twisted as she thought of how her father had worked through similar issues, his voice bouncing off the walls in the castle as he had shouted and grumped through problems as well. It had never been this bad, and hadn't involved nations, but it had been with neighboring Teyrns, and that was enough of a mess.
"Then you will have to be happy with our current forces, including the Wardens, won't you?" Cailan sneered at Loghain. With a more composed face, he turned to the Commander of the Grey. "Duncan, what do you think of this?"
The men proceeded to talk more of plans of the battle, pointing out where to place forces, how the attack should go, and where they speculated the Darkspawn would come from. It wasn't as complicated as she had thought, but it wasn't as interested as she would like. Avi leaned against one of the crumbling pillars, a dry stem of grass between her fingers. It distracted her into the past, where she had run and played with Fergus in the fields, turning grass blades into whistles. Those were happier times, when the world was much simpler, when there was no bloodshed, no war, and no chance that they would all be murdered in their beds by someone they thought a friend.
She snapped to when Cailan glanced her way. "I understand that congratulations are in order, Lady Cousland? Or is it just Avianna now, since you have become one of the Wardens?" His face had softened into a much calmer expression, a smile toying at the edge of his lips.
"Thank you, your majesty. I believe it is just Avianna, now. I will always remember where I come from though." She ducked her head, trying to ignore the burning glare that Loghain was casting her way.
"Your fascination with glory and legends will be your undoing. We must attend to reality! Who cares if there is one more Warden? Her likeliness to survive is small. The likelihood of this battle being written about as a legend and turned into one of your storybook fantasies is not a possibility. You need to think of how to win the battle, not how to get your name on the lips of bards and poets and in the pens of the authors." Loghain stepped in between them, his massive frame making Avianna feel so much smaller than she actually was.
Back to planning more details they went, and this time, there was mention of a tower. Cailan nodded at Duncan. "You will have some of your men light the beacon in the tower, signaling Loghain and his army to charge the flank. The beacon will be in the Tower of Ishal, which will make it visible from all around the battlefield."
Duncan nodded. He would pick out the perfect troops for this assignment, even though it was likely to be a boring task.
"I think that Alistair and Avianna will be the best for the task, your Majesty." Duncan bowed respectfully.
"So I won't get to fight in the battle?" Avi tipped herself back up from the column, her forehead crumpled from Cailan's nod of agreement. "We will do our best, your Majesty."
"The beacon being lit is of utmost importance. I know it seems a little task, but it must be done at the right time, and you must not fail in your task. Do not think this a little thing we send you to do." Duncan reassured her.
Cailan looked more than a little pleased, but it did not settle her feeling of ill will. "You see? Glory for everyone, all around!" It obviously pleased him.
"I still think it foolish to rely on these Grey Wardens as much as you do…it is unwise." Loghain was muttering to himself.
"I have no more time for your addled conspiracy theories, Loghain! Enough!" Cailan slammed his fist down on the table once more. "The Grey Wardens battle the Blight no matter where they are from and no matter where the Blight strikes, and that is here and now. We must and will use them!"
"Your majesty, there is always the possibility that the Archdemon could appear. I have no guarantees of that, but I have been hearing it, and seeing it. I am truly concerned that this is a real Blight because of that fact, but I cannot prove it yet. We can't ignore this now, especially since the Darkspawn are being reported in such large numbers." Duncan said.
"You worry too much, old man. There have been no reports of dragons anywhere in the Wilds, only Darkspawn." Loghain snarled.
"Again, this is why the Grey Wardens are here. We need them in case the Archdemon does show up." Cailan rolled his eyes at Loghain.
The senior enchanter, who had been standing on the other side of Duncan spoke up. His creaky voice make Avianna cringe, a twitch running up her arms. "The tower and Wardens really are unnecessary, your majesty…"
"We will not be trusting any of our lives to your spells, mage." The Revered Mother hissed, her sharp voice cutting into everyone around the table. "Save them for the Darkspawn. I see no reason to not let the Wardens do the work."
"Enough! We are done bickering. This plan will suffice for the battle, and will be passed out to the commanders. The Wardens will light the beacon, my men will reinforce the army from the flank, and Cailan will take the charge." He looked displeased, but it was the best plan they had come up with so far, and from what Avi could tell, from the map, it was the best they could do in the confined area.
"This will truly be a glorious moment. The battle will be victorious, the beacon will be lit and you will charge in and over take them with pure force, the Wardens will help us defeat all the Darkspawn with their prowess in the field, and we will be sung about for years to come. What a day this will be!" Cailan seemed almost giddy, and it made Avianna uneasy. She felt that this would be risky, but who was she to guess at a king's decision?
The bonfire crackled behind Duncan, sparks flickering into the bright blue sky. Avianna shifted from foot to foot, her body aching from the trip. She wasn't used to this kind of life yet, and it was showing. Her feet had healed, but callouses hadn't yet started to grow. It would happen, all in good time, and she would eventually become more like a warrior and less of a lady. Was it possible to retain all the knowledge she had learned before, the properness of being a young lady from a good home, but become a functioning warrior for the Wardens.
The Commander turned to face Alistair and Avianna. "By now, you both have heard the plan. The Tower of Ishal is a crucial part of the battle, and the beacon must be lit at the proper time."
"You have got to be joking! What about the battle? Doesn't the kind need us on the field? Don't you need us?" Alistair waved an arm. He looked furious, and Avianna couldn't blame him…she was a bit miffed to be placed up in the tower, but they had to do as they were ordered.
"This is by the king's personal request, Alistair. The beacon must be lit, and I trust you to handle it properly. This is the perfect opportunity to take Avianna on her first real mission as a Grey Warden. I know it's not a big mission, but it is one to start on." Duncan sighed.
"Great. Two Wardens to do the work of one. Guess he needs you up there in case I sneeze and drop the torch and miss my chance entirely. Loghain and Cailan have always had little faith in me." Alistair went from giving Avianna a rueful look to muttering to himself. The last bit made Avianna cock her head to the side in curiosity, but she didn't ask. How he had too much contact with the two of them made her wonder at the connection, but she wouldn't press it at the moment.
"Honestly, I agree with Alistair. I would rather fight…" Avianna barely spoke above a soft whisper, but Duncan caught it.
"Avi, I know you want something to do, but you need more training. You haven't had enough to warrant being in a real battle yet. I'm sorry, but I want to keep you safe for now. You did well enough in the battle at Highever, but that was because you were fueled by rage and the pain of losing your family. Now you would have to rely on skill and prowess you had gained in battle. This isn't the time for you to start. Soon though, very soon." He patted her shoulder comfortingly. The look of confusion on Alistair's face made Avianna feel a little better, though she couldn't crack a smile at it. She was still miserable thinking of the night she lost everything.
"I get it, I get it." Alistair sighed. "We will do the job that Cailan asks, no matter how boring and unexciting it gets. Just so you know, though, if the king ever asks me to put on a dress and dance the Remigold, I'm drawing the line, Darkspawn or no." He winked at Avianna, finally winning a smile from her.
"Way to take a stand, Alistair. Personally, I think that would be hilarious to see, and I would definitely give a handful of gold for that show. It would be a great distraction for the Darkspawn. Can't you see it now? They could all watch you and die in fits of laughter?" Avi giggled, her cheeks turning a soft rosy pink, making Alistair smile back. Duncan just shook his head at the thought.
"Me, shimmying down the Darkspawn line? Sure. We could definitely kill them while they are rolling around laughing. Thanks for all the support." Alistair gave a small shake of his hands and bumped her hip with his.
A groan of complete and utter disbelief in how terrible his luck was with these two came from Duncan. The poor Commander was going to need a break when this was all said and done. "The Tower is on the other side of the camp, across the bridge. From the top you can see the entire valley, and will be able to see when the light needs to be lit. One of the mages will send up a shot of lightning when you are to light it, so be ready."
Avianna twisted her fingers together. The vision from her dreams crept around the corners of her thoughts, making her wrinkle her nose and shiver at the sudden chill in her belly. "Duncan, what if the Archdemon shows up?" The thought of seeing that twisted, dark thing scared her, more than leaving home ever did.
"We soil our drawers and run, that's what." Alistair muttered.
"If it does show up, I want you to stay put and stay away from it. Leave it to the more experienced Wardens for now. I mean that for you too, Alistair. I want you both to keep away from this battle for now." Duncan said. "I know neither of you like that prospect," He said, in response to both their groans. "But you need to respect this order. I want no heroics from either of you, no matter what happens. Stay with the Teyrn's men and guard the tower."
"Thank you for this opportunity, Duncan." Avi spoke.
"I trust you both to do this and do it well. Just be prepared for the battle tonight, as we are gathering at sunset. I expect you both to do your duties well." He looked at both of them with what was akin to a proud gleam. There were other Wardens he needed to tend to, but for now, they felt that they were infinitely important to him.
As they began to walk away, Avianna saw Alistair stop Duncan.
"Duncan, may the Maker watch over you." Alistair looked truly concerned for his Commander, but the two shared unspoken words through just one look. Avianna knew how that felt, and for the briefest moment saw the way that Gilmore had looked at her, felt his lips brush across her own. She wished that they had had more time, and she could see that there was a wish for more time now, time for more words, time for more things to say, friendship and a bond of family that was deeper than just a Commander and Warden. Alistair and Duncan appeared to be good friends, and she could see this was hard on both of them.
"May He watch over us all…" Avianna whispered. They would need all the prayers to reach the Maker tonight.
