Episode 7: the Birds and the... Wasps?
My name is Ryoko Asakura... or at least it used to be. I used to be a Humaniod Interface created to keep an eye on Haruhi Suzumiya... or it was, until an attempt to kill the human named Kyon to make Haruhi react went wrong when another Interface attempted to stop me. She believes I am dead. She was wrong...
... I opened my eyes for the first time in 4.5 years. I was back. back in my old life. back in the "game". I smiled, and said the first word I have said in 4.5 years...
"RYOKO ASAKURA IS BACK!"
Yep. I'm back... wait, did they increase the size of basketballs?
No... I was... Tiny...
Ah well. I'll grow into my old body in a few weeks, if I stay hidden long enough. then, I'll move on to my original goal: Kill Kyon and make Haruhi react. Now, it was night. Dark and stormy. Hopefully, nobody would be here. I could hide under the stands, considering I was in the Gym. Now, I gotta move, before-
SOMEONE'S COMING! I GOTTA HIDE!
I ran as fast as I- wait, run? I could teleport to behind the stands!
That I did. and I hid as long as I could, peeking out to see...
an... Irken? I knew about them: Strange beings that evolved from insectoid life-forms. This one was short enough to fit in with humans of high-school age without attracting too much attention. He also had red eyes.
If an Irken was here... Wait, he's speaking?
"Truely, I am amazing. I was able to escape that horrible "prom" thing alive!"
Wait, Prom was tonight. hm, must be holding it in the new gym.
"Still, I grow bored of this infiltration thing, and grow ever more hungry for the human's demise. Begining with that Kyon."
He's after Kyon as well?!
"Then, I seek out Haruhi, and find out what she is."
I yelled, out loud, without realizing, "OH FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, HARUHI IS A SPONTANEOUSLY MADE DATA PROGRAM!! ... oops."
"EH? WHO SAID THAT?!"
Before I could move... He somehow managed to grab me.
I could only say, nervously, "... hi?"
He smiled, and said, "You'll tell me everything you know about Suzumiya."
"She's believed to either be a spontaneously spawned, technologically created entity, a crack in the timeline, or God herself. She has the ability in manipulate reality based on her innermost desires, but she is unaware of this."
"... wait, what was that last part?"
"She has the ability in manipulate reality based on her innermost desires, but she is unaware of this."
"She's... a Goddian."
"Huh?"
"A race of beings that shift the tiles of reality itself. whoever is responsible for the death of one will receive that Goddian's power. I finally have a chance to rule the universe... and you are no longer useful to me."
"AIEEE! DON'T KILL ME!"
"I wasn't going to kill you. I'm letting you go."
"... you are?"
"uh-huh?"
and so, he let me go, and continued on his way, donning a wig and contacts, probably to seem more human. I wasn't convinced.
He's gone. I am alone for sure this time... or so I thought... until I turned to see...
"NAGATO-SAN! how'd you know I was in here?"
She replied, very simply, "I found out by chance."
Then she stuffed me in her bag and left me. THE NERVE!
YUKI'S POV
I have to hide her. If someone noticed her around, everyone will get curious. I got to the locker, and stuffed her in.
Then, I went back to the party. Zim appears to be in the middle of a cat-fight between Emiri and Tsuruya.
ZIM'S POV
Well, I'm caught in the sights of two human girls. this... well... can be described as awkward.
Then, I came up with an ingenious lie: "I BROKE MY SPINE! AHHHHHHHH!!!"
Both just looked at me weirdly... then looked like they saw something horrible.
Wait, what was that buzzing noise? I turned around... to the ugliest thing ever. it looked like an Irken with wings, a wasp's stinger, and purple eyes.
"What the... do I know you from somewhere?"
It, or rather, HE smiled. then, the beast spoke, with a slightly buzzy version of Vez's voice, "Hello... ZIM."
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Me: VEZ IS UPON US!
Zim: SHUT UP, HUMAN!
I asked him, her, IT! ah, whatever. I asked IT, "VEZ?"
It replied, "Name was Vez, once."
"What happened to you?"
"The Author fused Vez with a wasp."
Kyon yelled from the background, "HEY! DON'T BREAK THE FORTH WALL!"
Vez responded with a threatening look. then he looked back at me, and said, "From now on... it's... VEZPER."
I responded with, "Vezzer?"
"It's spelled, V-E-Z-P-E-R."
"That's VezPER."
"The P is silent."
Then, we proceeded to try and kill each other.
THIRD PERSON POV
Everybody was so busy watching the fight to notice a certain, foot-high, blue-eyed/haired girl walk in.
RYOKO'S POV
I have to kill Kyon quick. This will proceed to make Haruhi react, so that I will be able to observe-
The big bug fell in front of me... and opened his eyes.
dot. dot. dot.
I ran out like heck.
VEZPER'S POV
What the heck? Tiny-Girl runs away from Vezper? Vezper may be a freak, but- oh.
ZIM'S POV
"You should not have come back." I said with much remorse.
Vezper reacted by... FLYING out of the ROOM?
"HEY! COWARD!"
Then, he grabbed me and threw me to the ground, then poured Punch on me.
I screamed in pain, as he escaped.
He'll be back... "OWW!!!!! The Pain."
Then, a voice that sounded like Dib-Human's sister yelled, "Whiner!"
Ah well.
LATER, NAGATO RESIDENCE, YUKI'S POV
It was an hour since Vezper's attack. I've deleted the memories of those who witnessed the attack replacing them with a simulation of a typical prom night, and rebuild most school data. And now, I was telling the revived Ryoko that she will be staying with me until her body grows back to full size.
"So, I will be staying with you until then? That's it?"
"That's it."
"Oh. Well, I'm going as soon as I grow back to full size."
"That's fine with me. I'll be in my bed if you need me."
"Okay, night."
"Night."
RYOKO'S POV
Well, this was a day. revived, scared by an Irken and a bug thing, and now this?
Ah well. Still, can't shake the feeling I'm being watched.
MEANWHILE, ON YUKI'S ROOF, VEZPER'S POV
Vezper cannot hide forever... Vezper hazz planzz...
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Well, there you have it! Please R&R! Next, Ryoko realizes she's not the same interface she was 4 and a half years ago... and a line that will shock the world:
"I! AM! DIIIIIIB!"
