Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon, but I do have ownership rights to this... er... special story.

A/N: Possibly one of the weirdest ideas I have ever had for a fanfic, but hey, it makes for an entertaining plot! :-P Reviews greatly appreciated. This is going to be a multiple-part short story.

Something tells me you all know what I'm about to say here... but you're wrong! CHIPMUNKS WILL EAT YOU! There. I said it. Hahahaha just kidding. Really I want to thank all my amazing reviewers for, once again, leaving me flabbergasted: ChronoStar, MoonlightSonata87, Whartongirl11, dainlord, Krys7, a rose by any other name71591, hotflower06, KissedByAFool, Bunnykiss, CharmedSerenity3, Dulwich Said, SilverSlippers, Foxy Megumi, UFGator1, VoldemortsNipple, catasa, mangamania, SerentiyMoonGodness, shinomu, SexyInuSailor1, uranusfan1, sasumiofjp, LunaV-chan, MoonPrincess568, Diagnosis-MusicObsession, beh lat, snoopykid, Gwen xx, ange de l'aube, Celeste-Love, Nyah Rhys, Sailor Moon Has Balls, jessicam242, Piper Chris Melinda Halliwell, Flying Snowflake of Hope, Laney Tate, debora diskey, DavisJes, bunnie915, RoyalLovers1418, serenity wayne, xo Usako ox, SailorPrincess1237, The Crystal Princess, Alexis Blake, Callista Wolfwood, KAMI'S CHIBI TENSHI, everlove09, and Eternal Lady.

This chapter, we take a break from the closet-cramped girls and focus in on Usagi and Mamoru. But obviously, the Inners have not moved... we will read their reactions and see some more tomfoolery next chapter.

Also, a note... Usagi and Mamoru are a teensy bit OOC, just to warn you. Not overly so, but enough that Mamoru's willing to drink with a minor. He's sort of... dropped the rigid, rule-enforcing exterior people like to portray, though you could argue that this is only because he's just a bit hammered. Okay, so buzzed, but you get the picture. He's a kind of loose-gentleman, as I'd term it. And Usagi is a tad more forward; you'll see her naughtier side. They're both growing up, battling hormones... and about to give in :-D Heh heh heh. Enjoy!

Summary: What started out a harmless game suddenly became an incredibly awkward situation... The four Inner Senshi are dared by Haruka to spend one night staked out in Mamoru's closet without being caught. Never ones to be labelled 'chicken', the girls follow through... and get the surprise of their lives when Usagi shows up mere minutes later! Unfortunately for them, she's in a particularly lusty mood... And so is their dashing chevalier. Now truly stuck in Mamoru's bedroom of all places, the Inners are forced to play audience to their Prince and Princess doing the deed... with mixed reactions from all. Humorous, romantic, and slightly dirty! :-P Enjoy!

Warning: Adult content! Swearing! Younger readers beware! Rated M.

One Dark and Perverted Night

Part 7: "Let's Mead and Make Out"


Usagi nervously wound a blonde hair round and round her index finger, occasionally giving it a nibble when her anxiety gave a particularly vicious throb. Did the girls suspect her alibi? Was she missed at the get-together? And...

Was Mamoru even home? She pounded on the doorbell again for good measure. He certainly was taking an abnormally long amount of time... generally the wait for her was- at maximum- only about a minute. And it was already a solid ten seconds past. This was not good. Oh, not good at all. Should she transform; make sure all was well? That Mamoru wasn't bathing in a pool of his own blood? That... oh dear god... he wasn't currently fondling another woman, petting her hair... stroking her-

Oh.

"Hi, Usako," Mamoru greeted after shuffling with the knob, arms mercifully devoid of both crimson and females. Usagi breathed a sigh of relief.

"What took you so long?" the flaxen-haired moon princess whined, marching over the threshold with an ornery disposition about her. She sniffed faux-irritably, subtly glancing around just to make sure a horde of horny coquettes weren't currently ducking behind the furniture or something.

Ooh, if only she knew.

"Did you just hear something?" the civilianized warrior suddenly inquired, freezing. Sounded like... Rei's voice? She was only imagining things... right?

"No," Mamoru replied, giving her a strange look. Usagi shook it off. Definitely going crazy...

"So... what took so long?"

"I was... pre-occupied," Mamoru mumbled, ears turning pink.

"How?" Usagi asked, suddenly intrigued by the tell-tale blush marring his complexion.

Mamoru stuttered something muffled that sounded a lot like "toilet", then abruptly changed the subject. "Would you care for something to drink?"

Usagi nodded eagerly, traipsing cheerfully in his wake as the last year university student led the way. She cocked an eyebrow after noticing the slight stumble to his usually sure-footed gait.

"Did you start the party without me?" she pouted.

Mamoru laughed heartily. "I only took a few sips... but considering I'm not much of a drinker, I've already got this buzz... my stomach's all warm and my balance isn't quite what it was an hour ago," he chuckled, self-depreciating.

Usagi sighed, shaking her head.

"You're not the only one... but I do have to say, after my couple of accidental run-ins with the hard stuff... I've become rather fond of the taste. It... helps take my mind off things once in a while," she admitted, with a flush. Mamoru paused in the kitchen entryway. He looked vaguely concerned, and wrapped a protective arm round her waist.

"You don't indulge often, I hope?"

"Of course not! Only when I manage to swipe a few swigs from Papa's stores without him noticing. I'm still as much a lush as I've ever been," Usagi snickered. "But it really does help, sometimes."

"I know... I had a rough day at work. But I've also been thinking a lot... about our future... Do you realize how quickly Crystal Tokyo is sneaking up on us?"

Usagi shivered. "I'm elated... but terrified. In most respects, I'm still a normal girl! I haven't had to transform for a whole year, but now suddenly Luna's nagging me about 'royal responsibilities'. I only just got to start enjoying peace! Don't we deserve a little more time?"

Mamoru nodded. "I feel it too. The crushing weight of it all, bearing down. It's hard to believe that in a few years, we'll be head of a kingdom... and parents to boot... it's just so surreal!"

Usagi twisted into his embrace, reaching up on tiptoe so she could cling to his neck. "I just want time alone with you. To not be worrying about Queenhood, and motherhood... or even exams! Is that so much to ask ruddy fate after all I've done for the world?"

"No," Mamoru said, capturing her lips in a soft kiss. He pulled away, but their hands were still connected at the palms. The ebony-haired twenty-one year old pulled his girlfriend into the humble dining area, currently flooded with warm yellow light. A single window jutted out above his kitchen sink, forecasting the cloudy night sky beyond. The moon tried futilely to peek out from behind a gray cirrus, but the clouds held their own, puffy bodies a precursor to rain and tempests alike. Luckily, a thousand pearly streetlamps from Tokyo took over where the moon failed, providing an artificial luminescence the couple inside detested. Usagi frowned as she watched her mother deity struggle, then faced away from the pane. She watched Mamoru riffle through his cabinets for some wine glasses, then triumphantly produce a bottle of honey mead. He winked, tipping them both a copious amount of the sweet elixir. Usagi giggled at his sloshy smile, wondering if that was what she looked like when she got hammered.

Mamoru passed her the mead, then raised his own glass.

"To life and peace."

"To life and peace!" Usagi crowed, gulping down the liquid with gusto. Mamoru sipped his a little more conservatively, midnight eyes gleaming with humor when Usagi proclaimed her desire for second helpings.

"Take your time," he warned, Usagi off-handedly assuring him that 'she knew, she knew'. He poured the teen another entire glass, then the final dregs into his own half-empty one. Together, they drained the glasses while chatting about the mundane aspects of school and jobs. Usagi was the first to broach the subject of Mamoru's day.

"You said earlier that work was rough," the Moon Princess commented, tracing the glass' rim with her middle finger. She peeked up at his expression from under her long lashes. "And I was just wondering... if maybe you wanted to talk about it...?"

An angry shadow flickered across Mamoru's countenance. "My boss was being, in all fairness, an absolute asshole. I don't normally like to pin that name on anyone... but he fits the description. I caught him making derogatory racist remarks in front of one of our foreign employees. And get this- an hour later, he had to give a talk on the importance of recognizing and appreciating office diversity! Apparently it was 'so well done', the execs gave him a bonus, which he was sure to flaunt to anyone who would listen!" Mamoru scoffed, before taking a heavy swig as if to ease his frustrations.

Usagi, who'd been leaning across the table in rapt attention, shouted: "That DICK!"

Mamoru spit out the mouthful he'd been seconds away from swallowing, the liquor spraying all over his clean counter top. He began roaring with laughter, stirred into even greater hysterics at the surprised look Usagi wore.

"M-Mamo-chan?"

"Y-you... you... how'd you know that?"

"What?"

"Dick," Mamoru snickered. "I never in a million years would've imagined you to know language like that..."

Actually, I overheard Mako-chan use that phrase, Usagi thought smugly, but the mead was curling pleasantly in her belly now and she decided to play this to her advantage.

"There are a lot of surprises when it comes to me," the flaxen almost purred, sidling around to suggestively rub up against Mamoru's knees. The handsome superhero gulped in his seat. Uh oh. Did she know how much it turned him on when she swung her hips all seductively like that?

"Usako," Mamoru said in a husky, throaty voice. He set down his beverage, catching her roaming hands in his. "What are you doing?"

"Me? Nothing," Usagi grinned, all coy and innocence as she lifted her hands and took a deliberate step back. Mamoru suddenly felt a hollow emptiness as he lost the warmth of her body up against his, definitely- oh, most definitely- hornier than before she initiated her teasing. And the little vixen probably knew that, what with the way she was so hungrily appraising him.

Mamoru groaned, the alcohol and hormones and her tight fitting sundress he hadn't noticed so acutely until now, all surely conspiring to drive him wild.

He knew exactly what she wanted. She'd confessed her intentions before, the growing desires that came with burgeoning adulthood, and Mamoru sympathized. Not a day went by where he did not want to throw her down on his bed and make senseless love to her...

Yet something had always held him back. She was always too young; they were going to wait until after they got married...

But she wasn't so young anymore, was she. Eighteen was old enough to be married, to declare emancipation even, and suddenly... the idea didn't seem so taboo anymore.

Mamoru made a split-second decision right then, his impaired judgment spurring him into action, or maybe it was just years and years of inaction about to boil over. He stood up, cautiously sauntering over to the waiting eighteen-year-old. She graced him with a crooked smile, hesitating for a heartbeat to decipher his new expression. Somewhere in the back of her mind she could register yet more muffled noises, originating from an area within the vicinity. She doubted Mamoru was even paying attention; it seemed both cerulean eyes were greedily feasting on her visage, no doubt wondering what was the best way to suck her lips off. Still, she couldn't help but ask,

"Are you sure you don't hear something?"

"I- wha...?"

She took that as a no.

"I swear I'm going crazy, Mamo-chan," the Princess giggled, closing the gap between their skin. Oh, curse this damn clothing!

"Am I making you crazy?" Mamoru whispered, a lusty lilt to his tone that made Usagi's knees feel watery and weak. He began a maddening dance, sensuously rubbing and grinding his abdomen against Usagi, ravaging her midriff. She let out a tiny moan, a mere puff of air, hardly able to grasp the eloquence of words as she felt him hardening, and knew- it was her, doing this to him. The knowledge gave her a strange power.

"Quite," the blonde gasped.

She found that if she arched her hips upward just a little more... guided by Mamoru's firm clamp on her buttocks... then he was able to drag himself across her most sensitive spot. And that was something else entirely. Usagi felt electricity race across all regions of her fevered body as somewhere in her brain, pyrotechnics went off. She panted harshly in pure pleasure, only vaguely cogent enough to hear Mamoru moan similarly. He wrenched her up off the ground, backing them into a wall as Usagi wrapped her legs around his waist in a vice-like straddle.

"Now am I making you as crazy as you are me?" Usagi breathed into his ear, nibbling ecstatically on the soft skin there.

Mamoru groaned, pushing his throbbing erection against her again and again as she began delicately trembling in arousal. "You have no idea."


A/N: That was such an evil place to leave off on! Well... the more who review, the faster I'll update! Hope you liked it, and that it satiated the desire for a longer chapter.

AngelMoon Girl