I didn't move, we stayed at the entry of my apartment. "Oh come now, it wasn't that big of a deal. Sooner or later she would find out." Klaus replied lightheartedly. "I'm actually a bit shocked you hadn't told her yet. Are you ashamed to be my friend?"
"Yes!" I retorted. "I am ashamed! I'm ashamed that I let myself get sucked into your madness. You didn't have to do that. You could have just left. After everything you did to her, threatening her life, threatening my life." His eyes grew wide, he obviously didn't know that I knew that. "You do all of these things, these horrible things because you can and somehow I forgive you for it all. Somehow I tell myself that you don't mean to do those things that someday you'll— open your eyes and realize how crappy of a person you are." I was flailing my hands around in the air. It was as if I had no control of my body.
Klaus' lips tightened to a hard line and then he spoke, "please continue—go on and heave more insults my way. Who doesn't love having that happen to them?" Still fuming I ignored his sarcasm bread from sadness. He didn't to be sad. Not now.
"Do you get what you've just done? Or does that just not matter to you?" I stared him in eyes. "You may not care about the relationships you hold between you and your siblings because you have an eternity with them. But my mom is the only family I've got left. She old and weak now thanks to you. I don't know how much time I have left with her, I'd rather not spend it trying to mend something that could have avoided being broken." I could sense the anger from him and I could feel it swirling around the two of us as it infused itself with my own anger.
"Don't presume to know anything about the relationships I hold with my family." He took a step forward. "How about you take responsibility for your actions Alex. You knowingly defied your mother's wishes of you."
Slamming the door of my apartment with my mind, I took a step closer to him. "Because you made me!" I shouted in his face. "Do you think I had a choice?"
"Of course you did!" He shouted back at me. "I never compelled you, everything that you've done is been by your free will. Let's not forget that one crucial detail Love." He and I both knew it was much more complicated than that. I had nothing else to say, so I screamed and shoved him away from me. It was the first time I'd ever physically attacked him. Of course it didn't do much; it just barely made him lose his balance and need to take a half step back on his right foot. I didn't even want to look at him, I headed towards the back of my apartment where my balcony was. I could hear him following behind me. I could have protested it, but he'd already shown me just how little my wants and needs meant to him. "Because you're so clearly upset, I'll let that moment of insanity you just had go this time."
I looked at him over my shoulder, irritation engraved on my face. Suddenly I had the urge to cause him physical pain, the same kind of pain that tore through me whenever I allowed myself to feel for him. I concentrated on his collar bone and watched as it broke. I listened to the unexpected pain ring out from his voice. And watched as half the bone jutted out of place, the skin still intact. "I'm sorry did that hurt?" I questioned wickedly.
With vampire speed I was pushed against the nearest wall, Klaus' arm holding me in place; his collar bone already fixed. "I wouldn't do that again if I were you."
"Why not?" I pressed. "Why not hurt you? You hurt dozens of people on a daily basis. Don't you think you deserve some of that pain?" Next, I broke his hand. He growled in anger and pain. "I did it again, what are you going to do?" Snap, another bone broken.
"Alex!" He warned, but I did it again. The next time he looked at me his eyes were glowing bright and yellow.
"Do it! Kill me." I dared him, still pinned to the wall. There was something weighing on my mind, something that I never thought I'd have the courage to actually say. But in this moment, I had that courage and so I said it. "Kill me like you killed the rest of my coven. The rest of my family." I wasn't shouting anymore, my voice was much weaker but the ferocity was still there. I waited for him to object, to tell me he hadn't done that, but he didn't. And so—once and for all—I knew he was too blame. I couldn't control the tears, I thought I could hold them back and remain hard and steely like him. I was wrong. "I knew it." I whispered.
"Al—" I didn't let him finish. I never wanted to hear him say my name again. I fed off the chaotic energy in the room and pushed him across the room with my mind. He crashed into the picture hanging behind my couch and fell to the ground. There was a large crack in the wall where he landed.
I held him down in place and it seemed to come easy to me. I held a hand out with fingers spread, commanding him to stay on the ground. It was the same kind of dominating power I know he used over and over again on defenseless people. I hated the feeling it gave me, that undeniable feeling of control. But at the same time I relished in thought of being able to indefinitely hold him down. "What could you possibly say now Klaus? You've had all this time to confess. To tell me what you did—and you didn't. You kept it all to yourself." Curling my fingers into a fist I thought of crushing his skull. I knew I couldn't actually do it, so I forced him to imagine it was happening.
Sprawled out on the flower amongst the broken glass, Klaus gripped his head with both hands and cried out in agony. "Alex!" I felt the power and the energy churn inside of me. It was something I'd never felt before. And as I stood there controlling him I suddenly thought of Hope. I thought of how power seemed to consume her sometimes, how she had no one to help her with it. It were as if I was looking at myself through someone else's eyes and I hated what I saw. Because I saw him. I saw Klaus. In that moment I released him and crumpled to the floor against the wall. My head in my hands, crying.
I expected him to snap my neck or rip it clean off. I even partly expected him to just leave me there, but he didn't do any of those things. Instead he walked over to me, the cuts in his face already healed. I could sense him kneeling there in front of me, motionless. Still sobbing away into my own hands, I didn't bother looking up. But when I felt his hand gently land upon my shoulder I freaked out. "Don't touch me!" I screamed at him, my eyes finally fixing on something other than the inside of my eyelids. I stared him down. "Why are you still here? Get out!"
"If you'd just let me explain myself." He whispered.
"No!" I began angrily. "I resend my invitation to you—you are not welcome here." I watched as he stood abruptly, trying to fight the overwhelming force to leave my apartment. But it took control and pushed him out. And finally I was alone. The tears didn't stop and the anger never left me, but I was alone.
