Okay guys, this chapter is a little longer. Also, the story goes M-rated at the end. Be kind, this is the first love scene I've ever written. Enjoy!
When Amanda knocked on Scotty's door 45 minutes later she heard the sound of tiny feet flying towards her. "Mommy, can I open?" A tiny voice called out.
"Honey, see who it is first!" Scotty yelled back.
"Who there?" The voice asked, a smile forming on Amanda's mouth.
"Amanda." She said. There was a moment of silence before the door opened slowly. When Amanda entered the apartment she saw a small girl standing on her tiptoes, arm extended as far as it would go, holding on to the doorknob. When the girl began to sway Amanda reached forward and pulled her in to her arms to keep her from falling.
"Hello" The little one said, her brown hair falling around her face in waves. She had a small, green smudge on her check and her blue eyes were looking at her with curiosity.
"Hello, there. I'm Amanda, what's your name?" Amanda asked her.
"I Emmy." The girl told her, her body starting to bounce slightly. "I three. Mommy says you work to-gef-er." Amanda smiled at the mispronounced word. She could just picture Scotty cringing wherever she was in the house.
"I do." Amanda said. "Where is your mommy?" Emmy extended her hand towards what Amanda assumed was the kitchen.
When Scotty turned away from the pan of Mac' N' Cheese the sight of Amanda talking away to her little girl, who was perched on her hip, and a bottle of wine in her free hand met her. Her breath caught in her throat. She had never brought anyone to meet Emmy, coworker or otherwise. There was something about the blonde, however, that seemed to make her the exception.
"Dinner is ready. Emmy, why don't you go wash up?" Scotty said, taking notice of the smudge on the girl's face. Amanda lowered Emmy on the floor and off she went, stumbling down the hall. "I'm sorry, they were doing finger-painting at her day care today. She didn't get any on you did she?"
"No, she was fine." Amanda assured the other woman. She held up the wine. "I brought this, least I could do since you cooked." Scotty reached forward and took the offered bottle.
"Would you like a glass?" She asked, causing Amanda to tilt her head in apprehension. This was the part that Rollins always hated. It was best to get it out of the way though.
"I don't drink." Amanda told her. Scotty eyed the bottle before glancing back at her in confusion. "I'm in Gamblers Anonymous. I tend to gamble when I drink, so I don't drink anymore." Amanda finished. A reassuring smile appeared on Scotty's face before she walked past Amanda into the living room silently. Had she done something wrong? Did Scotty want her to leave?
When Scotty came back Amanda was still standing in the same spot, her face paler and her eyes wide with worry. She pulled the coin she had retrieved from her wallet and placed in the other woman's palm. Amanda inspected the coin and recognized it instantly. It was a sobriety chip for four years.
"My name is Ryan Prescott and I am an alcoholic." Ryan told her in a soft voice. All of a sudden Amanda wasn't worried anymore. Scotty had taken all of her insecurities and showed her that, not only were they okay, but she shared them as well. Amanda went to return the coin but Scotty stopped her. "You keep it." She said.
"Scotty, this is yours, I can't keep it." Amanda replied.
"One of the hardest things to accept, after admitting the problem of course, is realizing you aren't alone in your recovery. That's the whole point of the meetings, so that you don't feel alone, but sometimes, in the real world, that becomes less pronounced. You feel like being an addict means that there's this stain on your skin that you can't wash off. Maybe keeping my coin will remind you that being an addict isn't something to be ashamed of. It's an obstacle that you overcome every day, one that makes you the wonderful person that you are." When Scotty finished she saw tears forming in Amanda's eyes. Amanda rushed forward and pulled the other woman in a tight embrace.
"Thank you, Ryan." She said. The moment was cut short when Amanda felt a tug on her pant leg. She looked down and saw Emmy's, now clean, face looking back at her.
"I want hug too!" She said. Amanda leaned down and Emmy wrapped her arms around her neck. When she stood up the three of them formed a makeshift hug. Amanda felt Ryan squeeze them together a little tighter before releasing them and covertly wiping tears from her own eyes before looking to her daughter.
"Time for dinner, bug!" She said excitedly, reaching out and tickling the little girl. Amanda, once again, lowered the girl to the floor while Ryan fixed her plate. Soon all three were seated together at the table, Ryan on one end with Amanda and Emmy on either side of her, all listening while Emmy rambled on about everything she did that day. Ryan only wincing slightly at the poor grammar.
When Emmy's talking lessened and her eyes began to droop the women decided that it was time for her to turn in. While Ryan got her ready for bed Amanda put the plates in the sink and put the leftovers in the fridge.
"Emmy wants to tell you good night." Ryan said from behind her. "She's getting out of the tub now." Amanda turned and smiled at the other woman. They made their way to the bathroom where Emmy was trying, unsuccessfully, to pull on her sleep shirt. Both laughed softly before helping the child. Ryan held Emmy still while Amanda took hold of the shirt and pulled it over the young girl. Emmy smiled sleepily at them in thanks. Ryan scooped her up and led the way to the bedroom. Amanda pulled the 'Frozen' themed sheets back while Ryan laid the girl down. The brunet dropped a kiss to her forehead. "Good night, baby. I love you." She said. She then watched as Amanda mimicked her movements, placing a kiss to her daughter's face as well.
"It was really nice meeting you, Emmy, I'll see you again soon." Amanda whispered. "Sweet dreams." They watched Emmy roll over and snuggle up to her pillow before turning out the lights and leaving the room.
Back in the living room Ryan directed Amanda to the couch before returning to the kitchen to refill their glasses of sweet tea. When she came back she flipped on the TV and turned it to Pandora where a country station began to play softly in the background.
"Are you sure you aren't from Georgia?" Amanda laughed. "I still can't believe you have sweet tea, and good tea at that!"
"I may not be from Georgia, but it sure as hell didn't feel like there was much of a difference sometimes growing up in a small town in Wisconsin." Ryan told her. They lapsed in to a comfortable silence, just listening to the music and enjoying their beverages.
"So." Amanda said. "What made you want to join the FBI?" Ryan laughed.
"It's sort of a long story." Amanda raised her eyebrows at the response as if to say 'and…'
"Alright, well, I moved to New Haven when I was Fourteen. Alex had just left, my mother had just died, and my home didn't feel like home anymore so I just emancipated myself and moved." Ryan told her. "So, there I was,this fourteen year old kid in these classes with twenty year olds getting my masters. Needless to say, I didn't fit in."
"I went to this party one night where there was alcohol." She continued. "My classmates made a game out of it, I think. Who could get me to drink first, how much I could drink, how well I could hold my liquor. I realized that I fit in more when I drank. They liked me more. So it became a habit."
"Flash-forward a few years and there I am, wasted out of my mind, and my so-called friends and I are breaking in to this convenient store. We hear sirens and they all take off, leaving me there confused as hell while the police cuff me. They let me sleep it off in a holding cell, but the next day I was thrown in to an interrogation room and in walks the FBI." Amanda's face contorts to a bewildered expression before Ryan continues.
"Apparently the store we broke in to sold stamps which technically made it a post office. Anyway, this guy proceeds to tell me that my brain is a gift, one that not a lot of people have, and I should use it to help people. He made sure none of it went on my record, got me in to a program, and as soon as I was eighteen I enrolled at Quantico." Ryan finished. Amanda placed her hand in Ryan's and interlaced their fingers.
"I'm so sorry." She whispered.
"Don't be. It made me who I am." Ryan said. "Plus, if I hadn't gone through that, I wouldn't have Emmy. She makes it all worth it."
"Or found Alex again" Amanda added. "How are you doing with that?" Ryan let out a small sigh.
"Not really sure." She answered. "I look at her and I still see my mom, but she left. And I know she had no choice, but I think that's what's making this harder. If she left of her own volition, then I could be mad, but she didn't so I can't. I don't know how I feel." Amanda looked at her intently, narrowing her eyes slightly.
"There's more though, isn't there?" She said. "There's something holding you back. You don't have to tell me, but I think maybe you should talk with Alex about it." Ryan smiled at her.
"I thought that I was the behaviorist here." She said cheekily. "Enough about me, though. What's the deal with you and Nick?"
"Oh, we had a thing for about a minute." Amanda told her. "We were sleeping together, but then something happened at work and…"
"The sort of spark was gone?" Ryan finished, earning a nod from the other woman. "What happened?" She asked.
"Well…"
"Feel free to tell me to mind my own business." Ryan said, causing Amanda to smile at her.
"No, it's fine. We were in a hostage situation. This guy was holding a bunch of students hostage." Amanda said. "I got the guy to let the kids and Nick go, but…"
"But a sniper was given the green light." Ryan said, realizing what the other woman was talking about. "That was you? That was all over the news, the cop who was in there with him, that was you?" Amanda nodded. Ryan scooted closer to the blonde and placed her free handover their interlaced ones. "Amanda, you could have been killed." Ryan whispered, realizing that, had things gone differently, she would have never met the other woman.
"But I didn't." Amanda assured her. "Ryan, I had the guy. I had him, he was putting the gun down and then they killed him." Ryan pulled the other woman into her arms. They held each other for a few moments before releasing and backing away, still keeping their arms around each other.
"So, after that the sleeping around stopped, I take it." Ryan said, effectively changing the subject. Amanda laughed. For the first time someone had actually listened to her without telling her 'it's not your fault'. She felt like Ryan actually understood that nothing was going to make that better, just time.
"Yes. I stopped it, but he wants to keep it up." Amanda told her. She looked at her phone and realized that it was already after eleven. "Wow, it is really late. I should probably head home." Amanda said, easing herself off of the couch.
"Yea, got to be in early tomorrow." Ryan said standing next to her. Amanda walked to the door where her jacket was hanging and quickly put it on.
"You coming to the precinct tomorrow?" Amanda asked. Since they got Larsen, technically the case was over.
"Yea, I have to fill out some paperwork and Liv texted me earlier and told me she needed to talk to me." Ryan told her, her hand going to fix the collar of Amanda's denim jacket.
"Good, don't want to get rid of you too soon." Amanda joked causing the brunet to laugh lightly. Ryan's hand slipped from her collar to around her neck, caressing softly. A shiver ran through Amanda at the touch of her skin. Ryan's eyes flicked down to Amanda's lips before returned to the woman's blue eyes. The blond took a small step closer to the brunet, which Ryan took as encouragement. She slipped her free hand around Amanda's waist and pulled her closer before lowering her mouth and bringing their lips together.
Amanda moan lightly at the sensation of the kiss. She had never kissed a woman before, but damn, she had been missing out. She reached up and cupped Ryan's face with both of her hands, pulling the other woman closer to her and kissing her harder. When Ryan felt Amanda's tongue brush against her lips her mouth opened in surprise. Amanda slid her hands up and fisted Ryan's hair deepening the kiss, causing Ryan to whimper into her mouth. When air became an issue the kiss was broken, leaving both woman panting lightly.
"I should really go." Amanda told her. Ryan only nodded in reply, not able to form words at the moment. Amanda hesitated slightly before leaning forward and kissing her chastely. Ryan walked her to the door and wished her good night. When the door was shut she felt her legs give out and she slid to the ground. That was an interesting development.
Meanwhile, in another apartment, Olivia woke alone in the dark. She had left Alex around six to come home to spend time with Noah while the blonde went back to her office to finish some briefs for the next week. After feeding Noah and putting him to bed she managed to stay awake for another hour before giving up the fight and heading to bed. Alex would be there when she woke up, she always was now.
She looked to her bedside table and saw that it was 11:45. She had been asleep for almost two hours. The sound of light snores could be heard coming through the baby monitor. Snores that she knew all too well. Smile on her face, Olivia got up and headed down the hallway to her son's room. Sure enough, there in the rocker by the crib sat a snoring Alex, Noah asleep in her arms. Olivia's heart swelled at the sight. She knew that simply taking Noah would startle Alex awake so Olivia settled for gently nudging the other woman. She smiled when Alex's tired eyes met her own. "Hi there, sleepy head." Olivia said.
"Hello." Alex said, voice still laced with sleep.
"Why are you in here?" Liv asked her.
"Noah was fussy when I got home so I came in here to see what the fuss was about." Alex told her, stifling a yawn. Olivia nodded, smiling at the thought of this as Alex's home, as she lifted the boy from the blonde's lap and returned him to his bed. She held out her hand for the other woman and led her to her bedroom. Olivia returned to bed while Alex left to brush her teeth. When she returned she was dressed in her sweats and tee shirt. As she walked to the bed she removed her glasses with one hand and adorably rubbed her eyes with the other. Olivia's breath caught in her throat at the domesticity of the scene. "I love you." She said before she could think about it. Alex went deathly still at the words. When she looked at the detective her eyes were wide and searching. "I-I'm sorry, I-"
"Did you mean it?" Alex asked with a small voice. 'Shit' Olivia thought. Did she mean it? Yes, yes she did. The timing might have been off, but she did mean it.
"Yes." Olivia told her, pulling the woman into bed. "I know it's early, I mean it's only been a few days-"
"Actually, if you think about it, we've technically been dating for years. We've just never been intimate." Alex said, interrupting her. Olivia smiled at her logic.
"Alexandra Cabot, I love you." She told the blonde, cupping her face with her palm. "I love you with everything that I am. You don't have to say it back to me yet, but now that I've said it I can't not say it anymore. I love you." Liv wiped the tears from Alex's cheeks and leaned forward to press their lips together.
"Olivia Benson, you are the love of my life." Alex said when the kiss ended. "I love you too, so much baby." Liv leaned forward again, kissing her with earnest. The kiss was slow and gently, yet filled with need. Alex's hands wrapped around Liv's waist and maneuvered under her sleep shirt. She needed to feel the detective, she needed her. She tugged on the hem of the shirt slightly. Liv, understanding the request, pulled away and lifted the shirt from her body. Alex did the same, tossing her shirt to the floor along with the detective's.
Both let out a moan when their bare torsos touched for the first time. Olivia pressed the blonde onto her back, kissing her again. She felt Alex's fingernails scratching down her back as she kissed her way to Alex's chest. She wasted no time taking a breast into her mouth, pressing her tongue against the pebbling flesh. Alex moaned in response, her hand moving to fist in the detective's hair, pressing her closer to her body. After paying the same attention to the other breast, Olivia began to move lower, taking the time to swirl her tongue through the blonde's belly button before coming to rest at the apex of Alex's thighs. She slid her fingers through the waistband of the sweats before she looked again to the other woman. Alex nodded her head, giving Olivia the permission to keep going.
After tossing the pants to the floor, Olivia was finally able to take in a naked Alex Cabot for the first time. The sight was breathtaking. Her hair was fanned out over her pillow, her chest heaving, and her center glistening. Liv gently ran her fingertips up the other woman's smooth legs, causing her to squirm in return, before she reached her goal. Olivia inhaled the scent of Alex's arousal before pressing a kiss to her folds. Alex whimpered at the contact. The detective swiped her tongue the length of Alex's core before pressing it to her bundle of nerves.
Alex was beside herself with pleasure. Every move Olivia made sent her higher and higher. She ran her fingers through the Liv's chestnut hair before tugging lightly. Olivia, in return, pushed two fingers through Alex's opening, pumping slowly.
"Oh God, Liv." Alex sighed out. Knowing Alex wouldn't last much longer, Olivia returned her attention to the blonde's clit. She sucked hard, scraping her teeth against it once, twice, three times before she felt the other woman shatter around her. She felt wave after wave of pleasure leave Alex. It was exhilarating. She helped the blonde ride out her orgasm before pulling her hand free and making her way up Alex's body, dropping kisses here and there, ending with a kiss to the lips.
When Olivia pulled back Alex smiled drowsily back at her, her eyes slowly drooping shut. When she kissed Alex again she felt the other woman try to switch their positions. She held Alex firmly in her position and pulled out of the kiss. "Not tonight. Tonight was for you." She told the blonde.
"But-"Alex tried to argue. Olivia cut her off with another kiss, which she deepened immediately. Alex moaned quietly at the taste of herself on the detective.
"Just sleep, baby." Olivia said when they broke apart. "I'll still be here when you wake up." She promised, her mind flying back to the first time she promised that. My, how far they had come. Alex nodded in return. The blonde turned over, allowing Liv to snuggle up to her back, pressing light kiss there.
"Hmm, g'night, Liv. Love you." Alex mumbled sleepily.
"Love you too, baby." Olivia replied, pulling her closer before sleep took them.
As always, feedback is loved.
