Papers are piled all wound the studio, giant piles that reach halfway to the ceiling. Some of the papers shift and YOSO's head pops out where the middle of the stage should be.
"Hi everyone! Sorry about the mess." She gestures to the papers around her. "My inbox kind of exploded."
Some more papers shift and Millie's head appears at YOSO's right with a letter resting atop it.
"I can't believe so many of you want to put up with us!" she squeals happily.
Ian emerges in between the two of them, coughing up stamps.
"A lot of these are reviews, Millie." he says, picking up a sheet of paper and showing it to her.
"Yeah, but there's at least 3 in here for guest stars!" Millie replies. She reaches for the letter on her head and hold it up for her brother to see. "This one's from LeelaSmall."
YOSO perks up a bit. "Whoa, really?"
"Yeah," Millie continues as she reaches for another sheet. She holds it up and looks it over before showing it to the others. "And this one's from LainaFantasyGirl."
Ian picks up a letter near him and reads it, his expression growing slightly annoyed. "All I've found are laughter messages and Eris's notes."
"Speaking of which..." YOSO trails off and looks around. "Where is she?"
Eris's muffled shouts can be heard.
"Eris?" YOSO calls out as she moves some of the papers around in hopes of finding her.
More muffled sounds are heard before Eris emerges a little ways to the left, gasping for breath.
"Whoa. You okay?"
"I'm fine." Eris replies. She gestures down towards the papers. "But I lost Carol down there."
Carol climbs out next to Eris, wheezing and clawing like a shipwreck-survivor.
"Aaaaairr..." she wheezes before flopping on the letters.
Ian surveys the area. "Where's Nick?"
The camera zooms out a little so that Nick is visible as he digs his way out of a slightly raised platform of paper behind everyone. He picks up a sheet and reads it, squinting slightly.
"Are these all my messages?" he asks.
"Yup." YOSO replies. She clasps her hands together. "Time for a head count." She points everyone out as she mumbles their names. "Millie, Ian, Eris, Carol, Nick... Where's Beck?"
Ian's eyes widen suddenly and his eyes dart frantically to the papers around him. "Something just went past my leg."
Millie raises an eyebrow in question. "What?"
"Look, there it is again!" he says as he points to a spot in between him and his sister.
YOSO looks to the spot and then to the area around herself. She reaches her hand into the papers and digs around for a bit before pulling back holding Beck by the ear.
"Ow-ow-ow-ow-ow-ow-ow! Let go!" Beck yells, holding his hands up to his ear.
He lurches backwards as YOSO lets go. She puts her hands on her hips.
"And just what do you think you're doing?" she asks.
"Come on." Beck says, rolling his eyes slightly. "That was too good an opportunity to pass up!"
YOSO, apparently not having any of his nonsense, pushes him back under.
"Help!" Beck shouts bobbing up, only to get pushed back down. "Drowning! In! Corniness!" He stays down.
Satisfied, YOSO dusts off her hands. She yelps as she abruptly gets pulled under. Millie looks apprehensively to where YOSO was standing.
"YOSO?" she calls out quietly. She shrieks as she gets pulled under. "Eep!"
"Uh-oh..." Ian takes a step backwards before he, too, get pulled under. "Aack!"
"I can already see where this is going," Eris says. She tries to run away but gets pulled under.
Carol starts to sink into the papers. "Noooooo!" she yells before she goes under completely.
Nick looks around and snatches his coat away when it looks like it's being pulled on.
"Nope!" he shouts, running away. He makes it about 3 ft before tripping and disappearing under the papers.
The papers shuffle as everyone moves around in them.
"No!" Millie can be heard yelling between giggles. "Stop! Mercy!"
"Hey!" YOSO yells out before laughing uncontrollably. "Get back here, Eris!"
"Catch me if you can!" Eris yells back.
"Give me back my shoe!" Beck yells.
"Nope!" Carol snickers.
"Hey, how about we 'delete' some of this mail?" Nick says slyly.
The shuffling stops, then everyone shouts a collective "NO!"
The papers begin to shift wildly as a wrestling match unfolds underneath them.
"Hold him down!"
"Hand it over!"
"Don't let him light it!"
The camera pans to the door, where stands a Caucasian girl with long wavy chocolate-brown hair and green eyes, wearing a Warfstache t-shirt and jeans. She gawks dumbfoundedly at the state the studio is in. YOSO pokes her head out of the papers, her arms following shortly after with a lighter in hand.
"I got it!" she yells triumphantly. She looks up at the girl at the door. "Hi, Leela!"
Ian emerges from the papers. "Leela's here?"
Millie pops out and raises her arms. "Leela!"
Leela cranes her head to look around. "What happened here?"
Eris pokes her head out. "Inbox explosion," she says simply.
Nick's arm reaches out of the papers and reaches for the lighter in YOSO's hand. She pulls it out of his range.
"You are so not getting this back," she says to the appendage. She abruptly goes under, shouting out the final message of "SOS!"
Ian looks to where YOSO was. "We're coming!" he yells, before diving into the papers.
Millie holds her nose and pops back under, followed by Eris who first grins at Leela.
Leela looks to the camera and shrugs. "If you can't beat 'em, join 'em." She cannonballs into the papers.
YOSO stands onstage with papers sticking out of her hair. "Hello and welcome back to 'What Do Ya Think?'!"
Millie walks onstage, also with papers in her hair. She covers her mouth with her hands in an attempt to stifle her giggles. "Hey YOSO. You got a little something there." she says, pointing to YOSO's hair.
YOSO reaches for the papers. "So do you." she chuckles.
Millie smiles, and follows YOSO's example, picking papers out of her own hair.
Beck walks onstage, papers poking out from under his cap. "I got a bit of a problem."
"What happened?" YOSO asks.
"This." He lifts the hat off of his head with both hands, causing tons of papers to fall out.
Millie doubles over laughing.
Ian walks onstage. "I got a problem too."
"What happened to you?" Millie asks in between snickers.
He spreads his arms and papers fall out of his sleeves. Nick walks onstage, his trench-coat pockets bulging.
"I top all of you." he says, then shakes like a dog. Papers fly out of his pockets and go everywhere.
Carol stomps onstage as if she's walking through blizzard. "This storm be a strong one." she says, mimicking a sea captain. "Hoist the main sail, lads!"
The camera zooms out a bit to show Eris hiding behind an umbrella.
Nick stops shaking. "And I'm done. Wait..." He takes off his trench coat and gives it one final whip, the last wave of papers flying out. He puts it back on. "Now I'm done."
Leela walks onstage, repeatedly picking papers out of one spot in her hair. "Why is it that when I pick a paper out, another one seems to grow back in its place?" To demonstrate, she pulls a paper out, only to have another immediately takes its spot, the same way how a tissue box works.
"I think we need a few more minutes to sort this out." YOSO chuckles.
"Welcome back, everyone!" she says. She laughs a little. "For realsies this time."
Millie walks onstage, smiling widely. "No more paper gags."
Ian walks onstage and coughs up stamps.
Millie gives him a sideways glance. "Starting now."
"We need to give Leela a proper intro." YOSO says. She clears her throat, holds up a hand as if holding a microphone, and deepens her voice to sound like an announcer. "Introducing... our newest guest star... Leeeeeelllaaaa Smaaaaalllllll!"
Leela walks onstage flexing like a wrestler. Ian takes out his phone and plays John Cena's entrance music. Millie covers her ears in annoyance, then snatches the phone out of his hand and turns off the music.
"Alrighty then." YOSO says to Leela. "Anything you want to say, Leela?"
Leela takes the nonexistent microphone. "DIPCIFICA AND MABILL FOREVER!" she yells, holding up a triumphant fist. She clears her throat and hands back the 'microphone'. "Sorry."
"No worries." YOSO shrugs. "You can be as random as you want."
Leela smiles evilly. "As random as I want, you say?"
YOSO sweats nervously and cracks an unsure smile. "Uh oh..."
"Writer's powers, activate!" Leela exclaims. A giant pencil appears in her hands and she runs off.
Ian facepalms. "What. Have. You. Done."
"Let's see how long it takes us to sort this out..." Millie sighs.
"Maybe we can shrink it down or something..?" YOSO murmurs as she walks after Leela.
"Time to do the next segment." YOSO says. She is standing onstage with Millie.
"Which is..?" Millie asks.
YOSO scratches her head, and looks up thinking. "I forgot."
Nick walks onstage, hands in pockets and sans-trenchcoat. "Can I do my segment about the Transcendence AU now?"
YOSO snaps her fingers. "That's what it was."
"What happened to your coat?" Millie asks Nick.
Nick shifts uncomfortably. "Uhh..."
Carol yells from far away. "Nick, you owe me a new door!"
He sweats nervously and offers a nervous smile.
Millie facepalms. "Well, you can't go around looking like that. You look half-naked without the coat. It's indecent!"
YOSO puts a hand to her chin as she thinks, then snaps her fingers. "I have an idea." She walks off to the right and comes back with a trenchcoat. "This one's one of Ford's."
"What makes you so sure he won't burn this one?" Millie asks skeptically.
"Don't you think Ford would have burned it a long time ago if it was possible?"
Millie nods. "Fair point."
"But if he somehow manages to burn this one..." YOSO looks at Nick appraisingly. "...I could always give him that clown suit, since we don't have any other extra clothes."
"Sure." Nick says. He takes the coat and puts it on, then raises his arms to get a better look at how it fits him. "I like it. Its a little worn and baggy, but not bad. All I need now is a pair of glasses and I'll look like Ford."
"Speaking of which, did you want to talk to him?"
"No, I'm gonna be talking to Dipper, Mabel, and Bill."
"Alright."
7 minutes later...
Bill floats in, his eye portraying his annoyed mood. "What do you meatbags want now?" he sneers.
"We have a special segment planned for you." YOSO says.
"Then why are they here?" he asks, pointing at Dipper and Mabel, who just walked in.
"Because they're a part of it, too." she says. She turns to Dipper and Mabel. "You two remember the Transcendence AU, right?"
Dipper's breathing hitches.
"Yeah?" Mabel says hesitantly, looking at her brother in concern.
"I'm just going to sum it up real quick for Bill here." YOSO says.
"No need." Bill says, closing his eye and leaning back. "I already know."
"So what's it about?" she asks skeptically.
"Me."
"And..?"
"Them." he says, opening his eye for a moment to look pointedly at the twins.
"And..?"
"That's all I need to know." He crosses his arms.
YOSO facepalms. "Bill, the Transcendence AU is about Dipper being the most powerful dream demon-"
"Pine Tree? A powerful demon?" Bill says, interrupting YOSO rudely. He starts laughing loudly and holds his 'stomach'(?). "HAHAHAHA!"
"-because he defeated you." YOSO finishes.
He abruptly stops laughing, staring her down with a wide eye. "What?" he says flatly.
"Dipper becomes a demon because there was a power-transfer mishap when you possess him, which led to the two of you duking it out in a one-on-one 'Death Match'."
"Ha! As if he could even manage flying!"
"He manages a goof deal of things very well." YOSO says, a smirk forming on her face. "Being corporeal included."
"What?! That's impossible!" Bill shouts, waving his arms about.
"Not for Dipper, A.K.A. 'Alcor the Dreambender." she says smugly.
"Ha!" Mabel says, jabbing a finger at Bill triumphantly. "In your face, Dorito!"
Nick joins the group, shuffling some papers.
Mabel: Ha!*points at Bill triumphantly* In your face, Dorito!
Nick: *walks onstage with some papers* There are some flaws with this AU, though. First of which being that Dipper can't become a demon.
Bill: See? *crosses arms and closes eye haughtily* I know what I'm talking about.
*incredulously* You don't even know how!
Nick: *ahem* As I was saying, it is impossible for any human to become a demon. That's a simple fact, since demons used to be angels. However, Dipper could have become something akin to a Wendigo.
Dipper: Which is..?
Nick: *shows Dipper pictures*
Dipper: *eyes widen, pales slightly, gulps* Still not as bad as Alcor.
*closes eyes and rubs them* I beg to differ.
Nick: Aside from that, when demons possess...
Millie: *nudges Ian with her elbow*
Ian: *raises eyebrow in question*
Millie: *looks pointedly at his hoodie pocket*
Ian: *nods in understanding, takes phone and earbuds out of pocket, gives an earbud to Millie*
Millie: *takes earbud and puts it in ear*
Ian: *turns on music to drown out Nick's lecture*
Nick: ...a human, they have full control over the host's body. As I have said before, envy and hatred for humans turned them.
*walks to where Ian and Millie are, crosses arms and taps foot*
Ian and Millie: *smile sheepishly*
*gestures with finger to hand over phone*
Millie: *takes earbuds out of her and Ian's ears, hands them over with phone*
*takes phone, puts in earbuds, listen to music*
Ian and Millie: *mild shock, turns into peeved expressions*
*shrugs, smiles cheekily*
Nick: My final point is Hell, or as we know it in the show, the Nightmare Realm. In the beginning of "The Last Mabelcorn", Bill showed a glimpse into the Nightmare Realm. Though it was only demons and fire, we can assume that this realm is similar to, if not exactly the same as, Hell.
*fairly tall Caucasian girl in her late teens with long reddish-brown hair, brown eyes and her hair up in a ponytail and a black headband, wearing a crop-top featuring a sunset with the phrase 'Create Your Own Reality' written on it and a white camisole underneath, jeans, and sneakers walks in with her arms crossed*
*chokes on spit, nervously* Laina! You're here early!
Laina: Actually, I'm here a bit late. Someone forgot to come get me.
*stammers* Oh! Uh, heh heh... umm, that was... Ian's job, wasn't it? *points at Ian*
Ian: *deadpans* Sure, blame the kid who can't even drive a bumper car.
Millie?
Millie: *holds up hands, and shakes head slightly* You're on your own here. I told you to make sure we had all the cabs ready.
*looks at Laina, scratches head and laughs nervously* Everyone makes mistakes..?
Laina: *rolls eyes* Inadequate apology accepted. Now, what's this I hear about the Transcendence AU being bogus?
Nick: *technically* I didn't say it was bogus.
Ian: You pretty much implied it.
Nick: No, I pointed out some aspects which were less believable than others.
Laina: *skeptically raises eyebrow, speaks slowly* So... you think Dipper becoming a demon is bogus?
Nick: Again, not my word choice, but yeah, pretty much.
Laina: Dude, that AU is one of the best ones there is. It's almost better than the original Gravity Falls!
Nick: Sure, the writing may be good but that doesn't mean all of the facts check out. *points imposing finger at Laina* And nothing is better than the original GF.
Laina: All the 'facts'? *air quotes 'facts'* This is Gravity Falls! Stuff like that works differently there!
Nick: A lot of the legends and such line up with the Gravity Falls plotline, so it's only fair that the AUs should line up with the legends, too.
Laina: *firmly* Well, they don't. And they're just fine the way they are.
Nick: Really? Even the whole 'Alcor/Mizar' ship?
Laina: Alright, I'll admit that's weird, but the rest is just fine.
Mabel: *innocently* Alcor/Mizar ship?
*smiles wickedly, leaves and comes back with iPad and two trashcans*
Dipper: *sees YOSO's supplies* It's nothing good, is it?
Nick: You already know how Alcor is Dipper, right?
Dipper and Mabel: Yeah.
Nick: Well, Mabel is Mizar. So, that technically means that that version of the Transcendence AU is overall Pinecest.
Mabel: Question: What's Pinece-?
Dipper: *puts a hand over Mabel's mouth to keep her from talking, whispers in her ear hastily* Mabel, have you learned nothing from the time we've been here?
Mabel: *pulls Dipper's hand off her mouth* Stop overreacting, bro-bro. I'm sure it's fine. *looks at Nick* What's Pinecest?
*speaks up before Nick* Pinecest is shipping you and Dipper as an item.
Mabel: Eeeww. Dip's my broseph, not boyseph!
Dipper: *facepalm* I warned you, Mabel.
*swipes iPad screen* Pictures include... *holds up screen*
Mabel: *makes disgusted face* Blargh!
Dipper: *slightly taken aback* Ew.
This one's actually pretty chaste compared some of the ones I've seen.
Mabel: So why didn't you sh- *muffles noises as Dipper's hand once again covers her mouth*
Dipper: *whispers* Mabel~! Shut up~!
*puts a hand to ear* Did I hear that right? You wanted to see the more 'adult' ones?
Mabel: *eyes widen, muffled protests*
Dipper: Nope! Nope-nope-nope!
Aw, that's too bad. *smiles wickedly* I wanted to see what both of you had for breakfast.
Dipper: *whispers to Mabel* Just back away, slowly... *starts moving backwards with Mabel following close by*
*slowly advances, smiles like a shark* Where you going, guys? Don't you want to see what you're fandom has to offer?
Dipper: *whispers* On the count of 3, we run for it.
Mabel: *nods slowly*
Dipper: 1...
Mabel: *takes Dipper's hand off her mouth* ...2-3! *disappears with Dipper, leaving a cloud of dust in their wake*
*doubles over laughing*
Ian: What was the point of that, exactly?
Simple. Messing with people is fun.
*can see Millie standing onstage and fiddling with the set*
Millie: *jumps to try and reach a higher up spot*
Beck: *walks onscreen, sees Millie, reaches the spot for her* Y'know, I just realized how short you are.
Millie: I am not short! I am the perfect height for a 12-year-old!
Beck: Hmm...you look more like a 7-year-old.
Millie: So? There is nothing wrong with my height. *crosses arms*
Beck: Squirt.
Millie: *turns away angrily and resumes fixing up the set*
Beck: *pokes Millie* Shortstack.
Millie: *turns head and bites at air, narrowly missing Beck's finger*
Beck: Hey, you're small, and you bite. How about instead of 'Millie', we call you 'Stingy'?
Millie: *growls slightly, shuffles away a few steps*
Beck: *takes a couple step closer, holds up hands in marquee* Or how about 'Millie: The 8th dwarf'?
Millie: *walks away grumbling, wobbles back a foot taller* Who's- whoa!*nearly falls over, rights herself* Who's short now? *grins proudly down at Beck*
*camera follows Beck's gaze to Millie's feet, which have foot-tall high heels on them*
Beck: *looks back up at Millie* Can you even walk in those?
Millie: *wobbles* S-Sure! Barely, but yeah! *defiantly puts hands on hips*
Mabel: *jumps onstage, holds hand behind back, makes goofy voice* Did somebody say...*takes Bear-O out from behind back* ...'bearly'?!
Millie: *sees Bear-O, screams, flails, falls over* Oof...
Beck: Nobody likes Bear-O.
Mabel: *normal voice* What? *covers Bear-O's ears, talks to him* Don't listen to them. I like you! *in Bear-O voice* Thanks, Mabel. I like you, too! *turns to face camera*~They're quite a pair. Mabel and Bear-O:The Un'Bear'lievable Bear~!
*entire cast is gathered onstage*
Alright, everyone. We are getting another new member.
Carol: Who?
All I can tell you for now is that she has a very particular set of skills.
Eris: Skills..?
*grins evilly*
Nick: *pats pockets* My wallet's gone!
Leela: *pats hair* Where's my pencil?!
Ian: *reaches into pockets* My keychain!
Laina: *pulls up pant leg* My sock!
Beck: *feels head* Oh no. Nobody messes with the hat.
*12-year-old girl with short, brown curly hair, and brown eyes, wearing a Spiderman sweater, jeans, sneakers, square-rimmed turquoise glasses, and a necklace with a dragon pendant, leans against the wall, her face obstructed by Beck's hat sitting crookedly atop her head. She twirls Ian's keychain on her right-hand finger and holds up Laina's sock with Nick's wallet in it with the other hand*
Say 'Hi' to Danielle Pines!
Dani: *tilts head upwards so everyone can see her face* I prefer 'Dani', thanks.
Beck: *stomps up to Dani, snatches hat and puts it back on his head, tilting it with a little more force than necessary, he glares at Dani*
Dani: *shrugs; takes wallet out of sock; tosses them, the pencil and the keychain back to rightful owners*
*claps* You, my friend, are a wonder.
Dani: *bows modestly*
Next up, we're welcoming... Gabby!
*skinny girl with brown hair and green eyes, wearing an unbuttoned teal flannel shirt over a white tank top, jeans, Nike shoes, and a wolf necklace, walks in*
Gabs: You can call me 'Gabs'.
Congratulations, Gabs! You're our last addition! No more people will be added from here on out.
Gabs: *wipes forehead, leans back on right leg* Whew! Just made it.
Millie: How many people we up to?
Umm... 11. *brings hands to head* This is the start of a whole 'nother headache.
And thus ends another episode.
Carol: *walks in wearing a winter hat, scarf, and jacket and holding a duffel bag, waves* Bye, YOSO! See ya in the New Year! *walks away*
*smiles, waves* Bye, Carol.
Eris: *crosses stage wearing coat, mitts and hat, holding two suitcases, pauses to stop and hug YOSO* We'll be back soon. *picks up bags and keeps walking*
*smiles sadly, tears up a little, wipes away tears before anyone sees*
*camera pans to Beck standing at the door*
Beck: *wearing a jacket, mitts, and holding a backpack, holds up hand regally* Happy Holidays to all...*takes off hat and holds it to chest, bows deeply* ... and to all a good night! *straightens, puts hat back on and leaves*
*pans back to YOSO*
*smiles, rolls eyes*
Nick: *walks in wearing an ugly sweater under his trench-coat, holds a briefcase, brings to fingers to head in salute* Later. *keeps walking*
Leela: *slightly jogs onstage, wearing an infinity scarf, and a knee-length coat, holding a purse* Oh, why do I have to leave now?
Don't you want to go home for the holidays?
Leela: Yeah, but I just got here! I never even got to set up my room!
Laina: *walks in wearing a black jacket, and a toque* Neither did I! I barely got a poster up!
*shrugs* Sorry, but you can't stay here through all of Winter Break. You should go home.
Leela: Fine. But expect some serious weirdness when we get back. *walks away and waves before disappearing offscreen*
Laina: *side hugs YOSO* Don't forget us!
*laughs* How could I? *smiles softly* Bye, guys.
Laina: Bye. *walks away*
Dani: *very slowly walks onstage wearing ski goggles with a hat, a jacket, and dragging a suitcase behind her*
What are you doing?
Dani: *sniffles a little* If I go slower, I can stay here longer.
*sigh* If you go slower, then you'll feel sad longer.
Dani: *speeds up a little, looks down, speaks softly* Fine.
Don't worry. We'll be back soon!
Dani: *looks at YOSO* How soon is 'soon'?
*walks to Dani, pats her on the back* Soon enough.
Dani: Okay. *keeps walking*
Gabs: *walks onstage wearing a wolf hat, and a jacket, carrying a satchel, reaches into pocket and hands YOSO a room key and a small present* Happy Holidays.
*smiles gratefully, closes eyes to stop tears, looks up at Gabs* Thanks.
Gabs: *smiles, walks offstage*
Ian: *walks onstage* So this is it, huh?
Yeah.
Millie: *walks onstage, arms crossed, speaks softly* You didn't tell them, did you?
*looks down at present sadly, murmurs quietly* How could I?
Ian: *sigh* Come on, we have to clean up.
Millie: *pats YOSO's shoulder* We'll be fine.
*sighs* I just hope everything works out. *looks at Millie* Is the camera still running?
Millie: *glances at camera* I think so.
*walks up to camera and looks at lens, picks up camera and holds it at arms' length so that only her top half is visible, voice is tight with emotion* We're going on hiatus, guys. Not just for the holidays. Maybe a month, maybe more. Just need some time. *takes deep breath, smiles weakly* Thanks for tuning in to 'What Do Ya Think?'. We'll... see you when we see you, I guess. *reaches hand up to turn off camera*
*screen goes black*
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