Evangelion Fan Fiction Episode 7: Be with me/Abandonment.
Shinji ran anxiously as the clock on top of Nerv's HQ building displayed 4:40 PM. The streets were more crowded then usual. Nobody paid any attention to Shinji while he looked up at the sky. Blue and cloudless, He thought, perfect weather for a perfect date!
"Stupid! You really are stupid!" A girl said as he ran passed by her. Shinji was stunned; he turned to look at her. Asuka? He thought.
The words came from a dark haired girl who was chatting and joking with her friends. They stopped giggling amongst themselves when they realized Shinji was looking at them. They looked at him for a split second when he slowed down next to them, and they turned to each other, and they giggled and snickered in unison.
Shinji's face was red with sweat. "Ah…so…soo…sorry! I am very sorry!" He turned and hurried pass them. As he passed them they laughed harder. Shinji lowered his head. I hope Asuka doesn't know these girls, if she does, they might tell her about this idiot they saw on the street, and I would be teased to death! Shinji thought in shame. He kept running.
"Damn it! Damn it! I am really going to be late!" Shinji said impatiently; he stopped at the red light that said, "don't walk!" He curled and uncurled his right fist. He had changed out of his uniform, and was wearing a new shirt with a large "NERV" on the front. The shirt did cost him 2200 yen, but he thought it looked good on him. The jeans also had the logo on the side of it. Shinji sighed, and adjusted his jeans. He then moved his left leg a couple of times.
Man, this is too tight for me! Shinji thought. I hope Rei will like it, though. As he looked up from the "Nerv" logo on his jeans, he noticed another "Nerv" logo, and another, and another… The light changed from "don't walk!" to "walk!" Shinji breathed a sigh of relief, and started to run again.
He saw the Nerv logo everywhere as he ran. Clothing boutiques were selling new designer "Nerv" shirts and blouses, all for prices that students like Shinji really can't afford. Some 2,500,000 yen luxury car parked on the side of the street had whole Nerv logo: a leaf on top of the word "Nerv" on its hood; in convenience stores, the "Nerv" sports drinks were out- selling Pocari ones. Shinji looked at his 6 months old sneakers. It's time to get a pair of "Nervs". He thought. They are simply better.
He had never realized how popular his father's company is with the people in Tokyo-3 until today. Huh. Shinji thought, that's interesting. "Nerv, the future of this world." A female announcer said on a commercial shown on a TV inside an electronic boutique.
Shinji blinked, he felt a sudden chill crawled up his spine, his neck started to tingle. "Nerv…the future of this world…Nerv…the future…this world…" Shinji repeated in a low voice. The announcer continued: "You can be part of it, too! You can be the future of this world…" The blood vessels in Shinji's head were starting to expand.
Two girls walked by, one of them commented: "Ugh, what a cheesy commercial. I wish these guys, whoever they are, would come up with better lines." The other girl murmured in agreement. Shinji held his forehead. He looked up at them as they walked by. Both their purses had "Nerv" logos on them, in different places. The two girls continued to walk on their way. Then they stopped in front of a convenience store where the owner placed a cooler in front of it, it was full of "Nerv" sports drinks. While the storeowner wasn't looking, the two of them each picked up a Nerv sports drink from inside the cooler, and they quickly walked away without paying.
Shinji shook his head. The pain seemed to subside a little. I could use a sports drink right now, but I am not going to steal…He sighed. He ran to the store, and bought a bottle of Pocari, he paused, thought to himself for a second, and bought another one. He ran faster than before, the clock on the Nerv HQ showed 4:48 PM.
"Screw my father's company, screw Nerv!" Shinji said loudly. He ignored the frowns of other pedestrians, and hurried on.
Do you know what you are doing?
"What?" Shinji said. He looked around, this time, no one looked at him. He kept running.
Why are you doing this?
"Who's talking to me?" Shinji shouted. Another group of girls was walking by, but none of them were paying any attention to him.
What is it that you want?
"Shut up!" Shinji yelled. Still nobody turned to look at him. He ran faster.
Finally, he arrived at the café. The clock read 4:52 PM.
Shinji breathed heavily. He looked around the café for Rei. There were more customers than Wednesday, when Shinji had skipped class. But the café wasn't crowded. Most of the people were students from near by schools. There were some older folks, some college students, and a red haired girl who sat by herself.
Shinji's heart sank. No, it can't be…
Asuka sat by herself on the left side in the café, by the window. She was sitting where Rei sat last time. Shinji almost stopped breathing. Right now, I really don't want to see her! He quickly walked pass the dividing screen that separated the right side from the left, and once he got to the right side in the café, he quickly found a table behind the screen. He didn't see Rei. Rei isn't here yet…I hope she doesn't see Asuka and vice- versa… Shinji prayed silently. Oh Kami-san please don't let them see each other…
The front door slid open. A light blue-haired girl walked in. She paused in front of the counter, and looked around. Because Shinji was sitting behind the screen, she didn't notice his face peeking out from behind it, instead, her eyes rested on the red-haired girl.
Gulp! Uh-oh. Shinji thought. Drops of sweat fell from his forehead. This is not good…
Asuka looked up, her eyes locked with Rei's.
Asuka's eyes grew. Her eyes were the burning surface of the sun. She got up, and slowly walked toward Rei.
Rei's eyes narrowed. Her eyes were the frozen nights of Antarctica. She stayed where she was.
Toji and Kensuke appeared out of nowhere, they sat down across the table from Shinji, and held their breaths. "What the…where you guys come from?" Shinji whispered.
Toji whispered: "Dude, whenever these two scary ladies face each other, bad shit happens!" Kensuke joined in: "Shinji-kun, I think you are in big trouble…" Shinji curled and uncurled his right fist. These guys are really helpful, telling me something I knew. He thought sourly. Why is Asuka here anyway?
The two women stood toe to toe. They stared at each other with armor piercing gazes. Neither made a move, or said a word. Some customers in the café were leaving. They stayed far from these two when they left the café. The owner disappeared from behind the counter. The chattering in the café stopped. "I think these two are scaring people out of the café." Toji mumbled. "Shhh!" Kensuke said, his right index finger to his lips.
Asuka smirked. "So, what are you doing here, Wonder girl?" She put her hand to her hips.
"It's none of your business." Rei said with an icy tone. Her face was carved in stone.
"Oh really?" Asuka snickered. "You think I don't know why you are here?" She raised her voice: "I know why you are here! You are going on a date with Shinji, aren't you?"
Shinji's heartbeats almost stopped. How…how did she know?
"I saw you guys on the bleacher today. He asked you out, didn't he?" Asuka's voice trembled. "Well, didn't he?" She screamed.
"…" Rei simply stood there. Her body looked like a stone statue.
"Answer me!'
"…"
"You…you…!"
"What do you care? Do you like him?" said Rei, her tone didn't change.
"Ha! Me? Liking Mr. Idiot, that perverted jerk? No way." Asuka sneered. She crossed her arms around her chest. Shinji winced. Asuka's nastier than usual…
"You are just fooling yourself. If you don't open up to him, he won't respond to you." Rei said quietly.
"Oh, I get it! Now you are going to tell me how to deal with Mr. Idiot, aren't ya?" Asuka's voice was dripping with sarcasm. "Well, if you want to date that pervert, go right ahead. This has nothing to do with me." She turned, and started to leave.
Shinji sighed silently, so Asuka does hate me after all. He thought bitterly.
"You are just as self absorbed as him. You two would make a great couple." Rei said without emotions.
Smack! Asuka suddenly spun around and struck Rei on her face. Shinji, Toji, and Kensuke winced at the same time. The impact almost knocked Rei off her feet. But she regained her balance. She never took her eyes off Asuka's face.
"You…you wind-up doll! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!!!" Asuka screamed, and she stormed out of the café.
The whole café was silent. People stared at Rei. She just stood there. Her eyes became empty.
Shinji hesitated, he poked his head out from behind the screen, and looked around. Then he stepped out from behind the screen: "Ah…Ayanami…please don't be angry with Asuka, she's…" Rei didn't look at him. She turned, and stared to walk out of the door. "…her stomach hurts…" Shinji said with a blush, but Rei was gone.
Toji and Kensuke came out from behind the screen, both of them gave Shinji a pat on the back, and they left the café. "We are sorry." was all they said before they left.
Shinji was alone in the café. He looked around him, people were talking, reading newspaper, drinking lattes, and none of them paid any more attention to where he stood. More people came in, and settled into different seats. A group of first year junior high students came in, and took the table where Asuka was sitting. Some others sat at the table where Shinji, Toji and Kensuke sat and hid.
Shinji recognized most them. But none of them waved at him, or said "hi" to him when they came in. The owner had appeared behind the counter again, he was typing something into his computer.
The waitress came up to Shinji, and handed him a bill for 450 yen. "You know that red-haired girl, right?" She said, then she went to serve the table with the first year students.
Shinji didn't open his mouth. He felt numbness all over his body.
He walked to the counter, pulled out 500 yen, and left the money on the counter. Then he walked out. The owner didn't bother give him change.
The black clouds were filling up the sky as Shinji walked with his shadow as companion, through the streets of Tokyo-3. Most people were running around, hiding under roofs and inside buildings. The sky was turning from gray to black. His thoughts were stormy.
It isn't holding together.
Do you really love them?
Do you know what you are doing?
I was trying to reach him, but…
They only exist where you want them to.
If you don't open up to them, they won't respond.
What is it that you want in life?
"SHUT UP!" Shinji screamed; a thunder boomed in the sky above his head. "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU KNOW ABOUT IT ANYWAY?"
Rain had started to pour down from heaven. The raindrops soaked his clothes. He raised his face to the stormy sky, he felt the sting on his face.
"What did I do wrong? Why is this happening to me? What is it that I am not doing right?" Shinji yelled at the heavens. But there were no voices to answer him. His head did not hurt, and he wasn't dreaming. "I can't accept this. What is it that you are trying to tell me?" He continued to shout, but except the sound of rain fell on everything, and him, his head was silent.
His eyes were a blur. The sound of rain had started to get louder. He glanced at the city and its people without looking at them.
There was no city.
He blinked.
There were no humans.
He blinked again.
No cars, no people, no birds, no buildings.
…wait, there were buildings, just…they were ruins of buildings. Shinji thought. He shrugged. He kept on walking.
"WHAT THE FUCK IS THE POINT OF SHOWING ME THIS? WHY?" Shinji screamed again, his hands curled into fists. "WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?"
He paused, and pulled himself back a step. He was on an edge of a crater. He didn't care to know how big was it exactly, but he was sure it was bigger than the size of his school.
The rain continued to pound him, he looked down at the crater, and it was being filled with the rain. Something…something was wiggling…squishing…squirming…
He strained his eyes to look at the contents inside the crater.
Not…not again! Shinji fell back. The rain in the crater had turned into a yellowish liquid. The pace of his breath started to speed up, his pulse began to race.
He wasn't near the crater anymore. He was standing inside of a room.
The whole room was blue. The color was almost a dreamy shade of blue, but it was rather depressing. Either the interior lighting made the room blue, or the outside weather had. He wasn't sure.
There were some dead flowers in a vase near the bed. On the bed was Asuka. She was lying facing away from him. There were things hooked up to her that he didn't want to know what they were. She didn't move.
Shinji shuddered. The whole room smelled like anesthetics, and blood. He looked at her again. He frowned. Her position changed, and she was then facing up at him, her eyes were open. Shinji thought about the eyes of fish sold in a market. He shivered, he saw these eyes somewhere else, too. Where? He wondered. All of a sudden, his pulse raced faster. Asuka…she was…Shinji shied away from her naked form, but he turned to look at her again. She had only a pair of white panties on. His eyes opened wide. His breath became short and fast.
Ha…ha…ha…ha…ha…ha…ha…ha! He stopped breathing for a second. Hm…mmm…
He sighed deeply. He paused. He lowered his head. Then he looked at his right hand.
The palm was filled with LCL.
He raised his head suddenly. The rain had been pouring on him non-stop. He was on the streets of Tokyo-3 again. He looked down at his right hand. It was wet with water.
"I am so disgusting." He whispered.
He hung his head as he walked toward the bus station. He walked under the billboard with the "Men and Women of Nerv" advertisement on it. He looked up. Katsuragi Misato was standing in the middle, she was saluting something in the distance with a man, and a woman.
"Mi…Misato-san…" Shinji murmured, he looked deep into the eyes of the woman on the billboard. His eyes were slightly unfocused. "Help…help…me."
The "Misato" on the billboard was smiling. Shinji thought. She looks so happy, so full of life. She's so…beautiful…Shinji held a dreamlike gaze toward her face. He reached out to "her". His hands just barely touched her face. She was still smiling.
Shinji-kun. "Misato" said with a smile. She was no longer saluting the distance, she was saluting him.
"Ye…yes…Misato-san…" Shinji responded.
I will take you out for a big steak. You going to love it!
"Ye…yes…Misato-san…, let's go out somewhere…"
Do you like what you are doing?
"Ye…yes…Misato-san, I do…"
Hang in there!
"Yes…I will. Misato-san."
Do you want to be one with me?
"I…I want to…"
"Misato" was no longer wearing a red jacket and a black dress underneath. She was wearing a pink tank top with shoulder strings, a pair of jean shorts, and she was barefoot. She smiled at Shinji, and walked up to him. She reached out with her hands, and held his face close to hers.
They were standing in a room, there was a TV, a set of sofas, a penguin clock, a small table, and lots of beer cans. Their faces were inches away from each other's.
Heh, she laughed, welcome home, Shinji!
He smiled. She kissed him deep on the lips.
His body turned into a fireball. His head was getting incinerated. His hands were burning.
Hands?
He was no longer with Misato. He was standing next to a huge container.
Shinji was turning a red-hot metallic handle with both hands, he screamed, but then he suppressed his pain, and kept on turning. He quickly opened the hatch to the container.
Light came forth from inside the container. He took a deep breath, and crawled in.
Ayanami Rei was sitting when he came in, she opened her eyes.
Shinji smiled. He slowly crawled up to her. Rei smiled brightly. She reached out with her arms, and he with his, they held each other tightly. Shinji looked deep into Rei's eyes. Her eyes were closed, she offered her lips to him. He smiled, and closed his eyes. He took her lips with his. Her hand felt his back, while his explored her body, outside the tight white cat suit with markings she was wearing.
"Oh Rei…I want to be one with you…" Shinji moaned. He felt some wetness on his face.
…tears…? Shinji thought. He was no longer kissing Rei. He opened his eyes a little. He felt water drops fell on his face.
…red hair…? Shinji's eye sight were a blur, but he thought he saw someone with red-hair. He tried to opened his eye lids wider, but his body ached, and his head and eyes were burning, so he closed them again..
The last thing he heard before he lost consciousness was someone's sobbing…
Shinji ran anxiously as the clock on top of Nerv's HQ building displayed 4:40 PM. The streets were more crowded then usual. Nobody paid any attention to Shinji while he looked up at the sky. Blue and cloudless, He thought, perfect weather for a perfect date!
"Stupid! You really are stupid!" A girl said as he ran passed by her. Shinji was stunned; he turned to look at her. Asuka? He thought.
The words came from a dark haired girl who was chatting and joking with her friends. They stopped giggling amongst themselves when they realized Shinji was looking at them. They looked at him for a split second when he slowed down next to them, and they turned to each other, and they giggled and snickered in unison.
Shinji's face was red with sweat. "Ah…so…soo…sorry! I am very sorry!" He turned and hurried pass them. As he passed them they laughed harder. Shinji lowered his head. I hope Asuka doesn't know these girls, if she does, they might tell her about this idiot they saw on the street, and I would be teased to death! Shinji thought in shame. He kept running.
"Damn it! Damn it! I am really going to be late!" Shinji said impatiently; he stopped at the red light that said, "don't walk!" He curled and uncurled his right fist. He had changed out of his uniform, and was wearing a new shirt with a large "NERV" on the front. The shirt did cost him 2200 yen, but he thought it looked good on him. The jeans also had the logo on the side of it. Shinji sighed, and adjusted his jeans. He then moved his left leg a couple of times.
Man, this is too tight for me! Shinji thought. I hope Rei will like it, though. As he looked up from the "Nerv" logo on his jeans, he noticed another "Nerv" logo, and another, and another… The light changed from "don't walk!" to "walk!" Shinji breathed a sigh of relief, and started to run again.
He saw the Nerv logo everywhere as he ran. Clothing boutiques were selling new designer "Nerv" shirts and blouses, all for prices that students like Shinji really can't afford. Some 2,500,000 yen luxury car parked on the side of the street had whole Nerv logo: a leaf on top of the word "Nerv" on its hood; in convenience stores, the "Nerv" sports drinks were out- selling Pocari ones. Shinji looked at his 6 months old sneakers. It's time to get a pair of "Nervs". He thought. They are simply better.
He had never realized how popular his father's company is with the people in Tokyo-3 until today. Huh. Shinji thought, that's interesting. "Nerv, the future of this world." A female announcer said on a commercial shown on a TV inside an electronic boutique.
Shinji blinked, he felt a sudden chill crawled up his spine, his neck started to tingle. "Nerv…the future of this world…Nerv…the future…this world…" Shinji repeated in a low voice. The announcer continued: "You can be part of it, too! You can be the future of this world…" The blood vessels in Shinji's head were starting to expand.
Two girls walked by, one of them commented: "Ugh, what a cheesy commercial. I wish these guys, whoever they are, would come up with better lines." The other girl murmured in agreement. Shinji held his forehead. He looked up at them as they walked by. Both their purses had "Nerv" logos on them, in different places. The two girls continued to walk on their way. Then they stopped in front of a convenience store where the owner placed a cooler in front of it, it was full of "Nerv" sports drinks. While the storeowner wasn't looking, the two of them each picked up a Nerv sports drink from inside the cooler, and they quickly walked away without paying.
Shinji shook his head. The pain seemed to subside a little. I could use a sports drink right now, but I am not going to steal…He sighed. He ran to the store, and bought a bottle of Pocari, he paused, thought to himself for a second, and bought another one. He ran faster than before, the clock on the Nerv HQ showed 4:48 PM.
"Screw my father's company, screw Nerv!" Shinji said loudly. He ignored the frowns of other pedestrians, and hurried on.
Do you know what you are doing?
"What?" Shinji said. He looked around, this time, no one looked at him. He kept running.
Why are you doing this?
"Who's talking to me?" Shinji shouted. Another group of girls was walking by, but none of them were paying any attention to him.
What is it that you want?
"Shut up!" Shinji yelled. Still nobody turned to look at him. He ran faster.
Finally, he arrived at the café. The clock read 4:52 PM.
Shinji breathed heavily. He looked around the café for Rei. There were more customers than Wednesday, when Shinji had skipped class. But the café wasn't crowded. Most of the people were students from near by schools. There were some older folks, some college students, and a red haired girl who sat by herself.
Shinji's heart sank. No, it can't be…
Asuka sat by herself on the left side in the café, by the window. She was sitting where Rei sat last time. Shinji almost stopped breathing. Right now, I really don't want to see her! He quickly walked pass the dividing screen that separated the right side from the left, and once he got to the right side in the café, he quickly found a table behind the screen. He didn't see Rei. Rei isn't here yet…I hope she doesn't see Asuka and vice- versa… Shinji prayed silently. Oh Kami-san please don't let them see each other…
The front door slid open. A light blue-haired girl walked in. She paused in front of the counter, and looked around. Because Shinji was sitting behind the screen, she didn't notice his face peeking out from behind it, instead, her eyes rested on the red-haired girl.
Gulp! Uh-oh. Shinji thought. Drops of sweat fell from his forehead. This is not good…
Asuka looked up, her eyes locked with Rei's.
Asuka's eyes grew. Her eyes were the burning surface of the sun. She got up, and slowly walked toward Rei.
Rei's eyes narrowed. Her eyes were the frozen nights of Antarctica. She stayed where she was.
Toji and Kensuke appeared out of nowhere, they sat down across the table from Shinji, and held their breaths. "What the…where you guys come from?" Shinji whispered.
Toji whispered: "Dude, whenever these two scary ladies face each other, bad shit happens!" Kensuke joined in: "Shinji-kun, I think you are in big trouble…" Shinji curled and uncurled his right fist. These guys are really helpful, telling me something I knew. He thought sourly. Why is Asuka here anyway?
The two women stood toe to toe. They stared at each other with armor piercing gazes. Neither made a move, or said a word. Some customers in the café were leaving. They stayed far from these two when they left the café. The owner disappeared from behind the counter. The chattering in the café stopped. "I think these two are scaring people out of the café." Toji mumbled. "Shhh!" Kensuke said, his right index finger to his lips.
Asuka smirked. "So, what are you doing here, Wonder girl?" She put her hand to her hips.
"It's none of your business." Rei said with an icy tone. Her face was carved in stone.
"Oh really?" Asuka snickered. "You think I don't know why you are here?" She raised her voice: "I know why you are here! You are going on a date with Shinji, aren't you?"
Shinji's heartbeats almost stopped. How…how did she know?
"I saw you guys on the bleacher today. He asked you out, didn't he?" Asuka's voice trembled. "Well, didn't he?" She screamed.
"…" Rei simply stood there. Her body looked like a stone statue.
"Answer me!'
"…"
"You…you…!"
"What do you care? Do you like him?" said Rei, her tone didn't change.
"Ha! Me? Liking Mr. Idiot, that perverted jerk? No way." Asuka sneered. She crossed her arms around her chest. Shinji winced. Asuka's nastier than usual…
"You are just fooling yourself. If you don't open up to him, he won't respond to you." Rei said quietly.
"Oh, I get it! Now you are going to tell me how to deal with Mr. Idiot, aren't ya?" Asuka's voice was dripping with sarcasm. "Well, if you want to date that pervert, go right ahead. This has nothing to do with me." She turned, and started to leave.
Shinji sighed silently, so Asuka does hate me after all. He thought bitterly.
"You are just as self absorbed as him. You two would make a great couple." Rei said without emotions.
Smack! Asuka suddenly spun around and struck Rei on her face. Shinji, Toji, and Kensuke winced at the same time. The impact almost knocked Rei off her feet. But she regained her balance. She never took her eyes off Asuka's face.
"You…you wind-up doll! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!!!" Asuka screamed, and she stormed out of the café.
The whole café was silent. People stared at Rei. She just stood there. Her eyes became empty.
Shinji hesitated, he poked his head out from behind the screen, and looked around. Then he stepped out from behind the screen: "Ah…Ayanami…please don't be angry with Asuka, she's…" Rei didn't look at him. She turned, and stared to walk out of the door. "…her stomach hurts…" Shinji said with a blush, but Rei was gone.
Toji and Kensuke came out from behind the screen, both of them gave Shinji a pat on the back, and they left the café. "We are sorry." was all they said before they left.
Shinji was alone in the café. He looked around him, people were talking, reading newspaper, drinking lattes, and none of them paid any more attention to where he stood. More people came in, and settled into different seats. A group of first year junior high students came in, and took the table where Asuka was sitting. Some others sat at the table where Shinji, Toji and Kensuke sat and hid.
Shinji recognized most them. But none of them waved at him, or said "hi" to him when they came in. The owner had appeared behind the counter again, he was typing something into his computer.
The waitress came up to Shinji, and handed him a bill for 450 yen. "You know that red-haired girl, right?" She said, then she went to serve the table with the first year students.
Shinji didn't open his mouth. He felt numbness all over his body.
He walked to the counter, pulled out 500 yen, and left the money on the counter. Then he walked out. The owner didn't bother give him change.
The black clouds were filling up the sky as Shinji walked with his shadow as companion, through the streets of Tokyo-3. Most people were running around, hiding under roofs and inside buildings. The sky was turning from gray to black. His thoughts were stormy.
It isn't holding together.
Do you really love them?
Do you know what you are doing?
I was trying to reach him, but…
They only exist where you want them to.
If you don't open up to them, they won't respond.
What is it that you want in life?
"SHUT UP!" Shinji screamed; a thunder boomed in the sky above his head. "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU KNOW ABOUT IT ANYWAY?"
Rain had started to pour down from heaven. The raindrops soaked his clothes. He raised his face to the stormy sky, he felt the sting on his face.
"What did I do wrong? Why is this happening to me? What is it that I am not doing right?" Shinji yelled at the heavens. But there were no voices to answer him. His head did not hurt, and he wasn't dreaming. "I can't accept this. What is it that you are trying to tell me?" He continued to shout, but except the sound of rain fell on everything, and him, his head was silent.
His eyes were a blur. The sound of rain had started to get louder. He glanced at the city and its people without looking at them.
There was no city.
He blinked.
There were no humans.
He blinked again.
No cars, no people, no birds, no buildings.
…wait, there were buildings, just…they were ruins of buildings. Shinji thought. He shrugged. He kept on walking.
"WHAT THE FUCK IS THE POINT OF SHOWING ME THIS? WHY?" Shinji screamed again, his hands curled into fists. "WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?"
He paused, and pulled himself back a step. He was on an edge of a crater. He didn't care to know how big was it exactly, but he was sure it was bigger than the size of his school.
The rain continued to pound him, he looked down at the crater, and it was being filled with the rain. Something…something was wiggling…squishing…squirming…
He strained his eyes to look at the contents inside the crater.
Not…not again! Shinji fell back. The rain in the crater had turned into a yellowish liquid. The pace of his breath started to speed up, his pulse began to race.
He wasn't near the crater anymore. He was standing inside of a room.
The whole room was blue. The color was almost a dreamy shade of blue, but it was rather depressing. Either the interior lighting made the room blue, or the outside weather had. He wasn't sure.
There were some dead flowers in a vase near the bed. On the bed was Asuka. She was lying facing away from him. There were things hooked up to her that he didn't want to know what they were. She didn't move.
Shinji shuddered. The whole room smelled like anesthetics, and blood. He looked at her again. He frowned. Her position changed, and she was then facing up at him, her eyes were open. Shinji thought about the eyes of fish sold in a market. He shivered, he saw these eyes somewhere else, too. Where? He wondered. All of a sudden, his pulse raced faster. Asuka…she was…Shinji shied away from her naked form, but he turned to look at her again. She had only a pair of white panties on. His eyes opened wide. His breath became short and fast.
Ha…ha…ha…ha…ha…ha…ha…ha! He stopped breathing for a second. Hm…mmm…
He sighed deeply. He paused. He lowered his head. Then he looked at his right hand.
The palm was filled with LCL.
He raised his head suddenly. The rain had been pouring on him non-stop. He was on the streets of Tokyo-3 again. He looked down at his right hand. It was wet with water.
"I am so disgusting." He whispered.
He hung his head as he walked toward the bus station. He walked under the billboard with the "Men and Women of Nerv" advertisement on it. He looked up. Katsuragi Misato was standing in the middle, she was saluting something in the distance with a man, and a woman.
"Mi…Misato-san…" Shinji murmured, he looked deep into the eyes of the woman on the billboard. His eyes were slightly unfocused. "Help…help…me."
The "Misato" on the billboard was smiling. Shinji thought. She looks so happy, so full of life. She's so…beautiful…Shinji held a dreamlike gaze toward her face. He reached out to "her". His hands just barely touched her face. She was still smiling.
Shinji-kun. "Misato" said with a smile. She was no longer saluting the distance, she was saluting him.
"Ye…yes…Misato-san…" Shinji responded.
I will take you out for a big steak. You going to love it!
"Ye…yes…Misato-san…, let's go out somewhere…"
Do you like what you are doing?
"Ye…yes…Misato-san, I do…"
Hang in there!
"Yes…I will. Misato-san."
Do you want to be one with me?
"I…I want to…"
"Misato" was no longer wearing a red jacket and a black dress underneath. She was wearing a pink tank top with shoulder strings, a pair of jean shorts, and she was barefoot. She smiled at Shinji, and walked up to him. She reached out with her hands, and held his face close to hers.
They were standing in a room, there was a TV, a set of sofas, a penguin clock, a small table, and lots of beer cans. Their faces were inches away from each other's.
Heh, she laughed, welcome home, Shinji!
He smiled. She kissed him deep on the lips.
His body turned into a fireball. His head was getting incinerated. His hands were burning.
Hands?
He was no longer with Misato. He was standing next to a huge container.
Shinji was turning a red-hot metallic handle with both hands, he screamed, but then he suppressed his pain, and kept on turning. He quickly opened the hatch to the container.
Light came forth from inside the container. He took a deep breath, and crawled in.
Ayanami Rei was sitting when he came in, she opened her eyes.
Shinji smiled. He slowly crawled up to her. Rei smiled brightly. She reached out with her arms, and he with his, they held each other tightly. Shinji looked deep into Rei's eyes. Her eyes were closed, she offered her lips to him. He smiled, and closed his eyes. He took her lips with his. Her hand felt his back, while his explored her body, outside the tight white cat suit with markings she was wearing.
"Oh Rei…I want to be one with you…" Shinji moaned. He felt some wetness on his face.
…tears…? Shinji thought. He was no longer kissing Rei. He opened his eyes a little. He felt water drops fell on his face.
…red hair…? Shinji's eye sight were a blur, but he thought he saw someone with red-hair. He tried to opened his eye lids wider, but his body ached, and his head and eyes were burning, so he closed them again..
The last thing he heard before he lost consciousness was someone's sobbing…
