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Well, I figure writing in this journal is a good thing. I realize there is a lot going on with the Order...that many members don't say....and I wish not to either.....though, not only is the magical industry suffering, but love also.....I think I have found someone I love...that actually loves me in return...and maybe, just maybe...she goes by the name of Tonks....sitting here I sigh to myself...why would she love a lonely old werewolf...beats like me? When I am probably more of a hindrance to the Order than help....my head bows as tears fall...I feel as though, never will I be good enough.