Chapter 7 – The Lima Bean Smackdown
…
Dave's POV
Saturday mornings don't usually find me waking up with a grin on my face but today is a definite exception. I can feel the smile even before my eyes are open – and it's a damn good thing I don't have a sibling who shares the room. I crack one eye open and look down at myself. Whoa, that's a happy good morning going on down there for sure!
I rub my hand on my morning companion and grin like the huge dork I am. Closing my eyes again, I wonder what it would be like to greet Kurt with this every morning. I close my hand around myself and stifle the moan just dying to come out. I'm sure my dad doesn't want to hear this first thing in the morning!
I sit up and swing my legs over the side of my bed and force my hand to move away from my pecker. Anything that's going to happen had best be done in the shower, even though I'd had one when I came home last night. I can see quite a few cool showers in my future if this keeps up. I smirk to myself as I slip my feet into my slippers.
I don't even need to bother with a robe because my granddad had had the foresight to build this attic room with its own attached bath. Now I look down at the tent leading the way and I can't hold back the chuckle. I shake my head and I'm glad that nobody is here to see me acting like this… well, I wish Kurt were here.
I glance at the clock as I head into the bathroom and realize that I actually had slept longer than I'd thought. It was nearly 11 and if I know my best friend, he'll either be blowing up my phone with obnoxious texts or pounding on my door as soon as he's fed his face with his mom's outstanding cooking.
Inside the glass cubicle of the shower, I close my eyes, just plain enjoying the feel of the water on my body and reliving last night at the drive-in. Which kinda defeats the purpose of my cooling things down because Big Bad is now staring me in the face, he's so hard. I take him in hand and deal with him, picturing Kurt and remembering the sounds he made last night when he came. God, that boy is so fucking hot, I groan as I spill over my hand.
I let the shower water beat on my head and cascade down to wash away all that pent-up want, and I feel my eyes prickle as I think about Kurt. A part of me still can't believe he's willing to give me a chance; heck, not just willing, he's so damn eager… and responsive… and beautiful…
I shudder as the tepid water turns cooler, realizing I've been standing here longer than I'd planned. I wash quickly and get out of there, dressing a lot faster but with a bit more care than usual. Kurt had said he loved my arms – among a bunch of other things! I choose a dark green, short-sleeved top that is a little tighter than I'd usually wear. The jeans are one of my favorites, though, and are surprisingly clean. Hmmm, I still need to do laundry but right now the more important thing is to look good for Kurt.
I finish dressing and grab my phone, realizing that I had muted it, and look down at maybe six messages from Az. I grin as I thumb through them, all of them on the same theme.
From Az: Where you at, Big D?
From Az: Boy, get your ass on this phone now!
From Az: I'm gon kick yo ass when I see it!
From Az: Yours – 11 – cook something.
I grin as I barely glance at the last two that were more like friendly threats, and head for the stairs, calling out a loud good morning to dad as I pass his bedroom door. He grunts and snuffles but I know that's dad-speak for 'good morning son; I love you; what's on for today'. I snicker as I take the stairs several steps at a time and bounce into the kitchen.
Ever since my mom left, I've been finding myself more and more open and relaxed around dad. It helps that he actually loves me unconditionally, like parents are supposed to. When I have kids, I'm gonna love them, no matter what (unless they turn out to be rapists, serial killers, child molesters, Republicans, etc.) and I grin to myself at that last one. Nah, unless they turn out to be bible-thumping, gay-bashing Republicans, I correct myself.
I'm humming and getting out juice and bowls, spoons and glasses, just being happy that my mom and her cloud of doom, gloom and pessimism aren't here to ruin things for me. I know my dad's kinda sad and missing her, but the longer she's gone, the less hurt I feel about her not being able to love me. I almost feel sorry for her because I know she's gotta feel guilty somewhere in there. Turning your back on your only son because of who he loves; that's gotta be a whole pile of karma waiting to kick her in the butt.
I turn on the TV in the kitchen while I wait on dad and Az to turn up, making a bet with myself as to who would turn up first. I look at my phone, wondering if it's too soon to text Kurt again. Ah, what the hey, he already knows I'm done. I don't think I'll ever feel this way about anyone like I do about Kurt. Just thinking about him makes something inside me feel light and real bright and I don't care how sappy that sounds, even to myself.
Good morning, angel eyes, not too tired?
I ask because you were doing a whole lot in my dreams.
1 o'clock can't come soon enough.
xoxoxox Hamhock
Feb 19 11:10 AM
While I stare at the phone, willing Kurt to answer like right now, I hear a commotion and realize that Az arrived just as dad came downstairs. Guess I lost the bet both ways; I grin as I wait for them to come into the kitchen.
"Boy, you lucky your dad's here so I won't drop-kick you 'cross this room!"
Yeah, typical Az greeting, so I just roll my eyes and push a chair out with my foot. My dad shakes his head and I'm sure he's muttering something about raising trolls but I'm busy laughing at the look on Az's face. Even though I'm sure he's eaten more than enough of his mom's breakfast, he was probably expecting me to actually cook something. Yeah, like that will ever happen.
I look at the boxes of cereal and carton of milk and shrug, asking, "What?" like I don't know that he's disappointed.
"You call this breakfast, boy?"
"Hey," I snark back. "You got your milk, your cereal… and I even got out the juice so you wouldn't have to. What else do you need?!"
We stare at each other in mock-irritation and then crack-up, dad looking around at us before rolling his eyes and sitting down. Az and I cut out the arm-wrestling for the Cocoa Puffs when dad glares at us but it's a near thing. He takes the Captain Crunch for himself and then says to Az, "I've got to call your mom, Azimio, to thank her for dinner. It was delicious!"
Az already has his face stuffed with at least two spoonsful of cereal and he simply nods and gives my dad a thumbs up. I look at Az and shake my head as if I'm disgusted with his table manners, conveniently ignoring the fact that my own cheeks are bulging.
There's silence but for the sound of three guys eating and then:
"So, D, aren't you going to tell me how it went with Ladyface last night?"
I groan and drop my chin to my chest, hearing my dad's chuckle and then look up to see them fist-bumping.
"Dad!"
"What? I think 'Ladyface' is a nice pet-name!"
"Mr. K, it's not a pet-name!" It was Az's turn to look horrified and I bust out laughing. Az continues: "He's not even my type!"
Both my dad and I are laughing now and when I can stop chuckling at the look on Az's face, I finally put him out of his misery.
"Okay, okay, yes, the date was great, Kurt was great, it was just… great!" I stare at Az, conscious of the way my dad's eyes have dropped to my collar which thankfully hides the little hickey Kurt left me.
Az finishes his bowl of cereal, pours juice for the three of us and then pins me with a look. "Uh-huh, it was all 'great'." He waits a beat … and then: "Boy, you take me for a fool? Details… I want details!"
My dad almost chokes on the last of his juice and hurriedly puts the glass down and waves a frantic hand at Az. "No, no, no, Az! Don't ask for details! Or at least, wait until I'm out of here, please!"
Az's eyes open wide and he starts to grin, covering his mouth with one hand and pointing at me obnoxiously with the other. "Ho, ho! Whoo-hoo! Did my boy get him a little sumpin'-sumpin'?"
Oh, jeez. I drop my head to the table and mutter, "thanks, dad" as I wait for Az to stop cackling like the fool he is. Finally, when the scrape of my dad's chair indicates that he's got up to leave and Az is finally quieting down, I turn my head to glare at him out of one eye.
"Look, if we're going to meet up with Kurt in a bit, I don't want you to say anything embarrassing, okay? I think Finn might be there, too."
"Yeah, yeah, just tell me what happened, boy!" Suddenly he narrows his eyes at me and that's when I grin with a bit of a leer thrown in. "Okay, only the above-the-clothes stuff, you pervert!"
I laugh as he amends his demand and I sit back to take a sip of my juice, enjoying that I have a captive audience in my best friend. Finally I set the glass down, dab at my lips in an exaggerated way with the napkin and then look at him, a little smirk pulling at my mouth.
"Let's just say – the back of that Navigator will never be the same again…" and wait for the reaction.
I am not disappointed. Az's eyes grow impossibly big and his mouth drops open. He looks as if he's struggling with whatever his imagination has conjured up and the desire to congratulate me for "getting some".
I can't stand it anymore and I lose it, laughing at the way his mouth is flapping like one of those cheesy singing basses you see on store walls. The tears roll down my face as Az tries to get it together and I finally gasp and point at him, shaking my head.
"God, Az, you should see your face." I wind down to just chuckles now and watch as he crosses his arms defensively over his chest.
"Yeah, well, it isn't every day your formerly straight best friend tells you he got it on… with ANOTHER GUY!"
I laugh, truly amused because I got to throw him for a loop and then I say smugly, "And I'm going to do it every chance I get, too."
I can see the fake horror on his face as he waves both hands at me. "Don't tell me, don't tell me; I don't want to know!"
I nod, ignoring him. "Uh-huh. I'm going to hug him, and squeeze him, and kiss him and…" suddenly a napkin is thrown into my face and then we're both laughing again.
"You boys clean up and get the hell out of that kitchen before I make you cook lunch!"
My dad is nowhere near as scary as Az's mom but we got the point.
We work together to get the kitchen all squared away, jostling and shoving at each other like we're still ten years old, and then head up to my room. Which is when my phone goes off, presumably with Kurt's returning text.
My heart jumps a little and Az looks at me with a grin as if he knows, and I slip the phone out of my pocket to stare down at it.
"Well, don't just stare at it, fool! Read the damn text already!"
I frown as I read the text and then hold it up for Az to see, watching his lip furl in that annoyed way of his.
From Kurt: Angel Eyes? Really? What're you - like 5?
BTW, 'Hamhock', this is Tana; Lady Lips is in the shower.
Heard you had a great time last night and not just in your dreams.
hahahahaha
Feb 19 11:40 AM
Before I can react, Az grabs the phone from my hand and hits reply, tapping away furiously while I gape at him.
Lopez, get the hell off of Prince Gay's phone! This is Az.
And my boy's a gentleman – he could have used some other body part!
Now hand the phone over to the fairy and let the boys get their loving on!
Feb 19 11:43 AM
I just barely get a chance to read it before Az hits send and I know the horrified look that must be on my face but all he does is put the phone on the bed beside him and smirk like a crazy man.
"Az – what the f_?!" Shit, I don't want Tana angry with me; she is one scary Latina! I look at the phone as it pings.
From Kurt: Listen here, you overgrown ape, don't make me go all Lima Heights on yo ass!
Queenie is gettin' ready to meet up with your boy – perfection can't be rushed.
Feb 19 11:46 AM
From Kurt: Oh, shit! I just found a text from Blah on Lady Lips' phone. So, being the wonderful person I am, I texted him our location for this afternoon – if you get me.
Wanted to give you a HEADS up :p
Tana
Feb 19 11:48 AM
"What's Kurt saying?" Az demands and I glare at him. Still, I show him the messages from Tana and he stares at me, the smirk widening. "Lopez is kinda crazy … but the real badass is that boy you got that hickey from," and he grins shark-like at me as I stare at him.
My hand flies up to my collar and I drop down on the bed beside him, hanging my head as I rub at the tiny bruise. I hadn't thought he'd seen it because he hadn't said anything; now I know he's not going to let me live it down. He shoves my leg with his foot and I look over at him to see him watching me with curiosity in his brown eyes.
"Tell me you left marks all over that lily-white skin of his, too, boy!"
And just like that my mind is back to the night before – the feel of Kurt's body against mine, his lips, my hands on him, the sounds he makes just before he comes… damn!
I shake my head and blink, realizing that Az is waiting on an answer and I feel my face heat up. I look away from him and sort of shrug, trying for casual.
"I-I, ugh, can't remember if I did or not… honestly, dude!"
Az just sorts of grunts "uh-huh" in this really skeptical tone and then leans back against my pillows. I look at him over my shoulder and then relax when I see him grinning at me. He folds his arms behind his head and crosses his legs at the ankle and I groan inwardly. This is the Azimio body language that says he's going to get a kick out of interrogating me. I sigh.
Az only grins wider and finally comes out with: "So, is he a screamer?"
My mouth drops open and I know my eyes are wide. "What. The. Fuck." I stare at him, and then an abrupt little laugh bursts out of me. "I'm not going to tell you that, you sick prick!"
Then we're both laughing and I can't believe my best friend would even go there. Well, he does have a habit of dissecting his encounters with the various girls that he goes with but I've never been that way. Hmmm, maybe that should have been the first sign that I wasn't quite into the same things as the other guys.
We calm down eventually and then, before I even realize it, I'm speaking. "His skin is the softest thing… and his mouth," I stare out the window where the limbs of that big old oak tree used to facilitate Az and me climbing in and out of my window in the old days. "I could get lost, just kissing him for hours."
There is silence and I only come back to myself when I realize there is no sound or movement from Az. When I look over at him, he's staring down at the bedspread, his fingers absently plucking at some thread or other. I don't say anything, just watch him… digesting all of this 'strangeness', I suppose.
Finally, he sorts of smiles – or as it's Az it's more a grimace – and says, "Yeah, well, whatever it is you got going, just be careful, okay?"
I tilt my head and look at him curiously. "Well, yeah; I don't plan to run around breaking anyone's heart, Az."
He looks at me kinda seriously and then pushes at me with one big boot. "I mean with your own heart, fool!"
We don't want to acknowledge that no-go zone that is death to all teenage boys – emotions. Yet, I do appreciate that Az has my back in this and I nod to let him know I got the message loud and clear. I look at my phone and shake my head. I really should text back as myself and I smile as I tap out the message.
Hey, Tana, it's me. Az is coming with, so we'll see you all at the Bean, I guess.
See you in a few – and tell Kurt I can't wait to see him.
Dave
Feb 19 12:01 PM
I can guess she'll probably have something snarky to reply so I toss the phone on the bed and head into the bathroom to clean my teeth. As I stand there with the water running on my toothbrush, I stare at myself, wondering again what the heck Kurt sees in me.
I brush my teeth slowly and thoroughly, my eyes cataloging my features; the eyes I got from my mom since my dad's are more blue-grayish. I think my eyebrows are weird and kinda Mr. Spock-ish and I used to get teased a lot when I was littler. Not so much, though, after I outgrew and outweighed everyone else but Az.
I rinse and spit and then wipe my face with my towel, my eyes scanning the rest of me as I stand there. Finally, I shrug; whatever Kurt sees he definitely likes, and I grin as I remember him reciting all the things he liked. That he finds my strength and size appealing is a definite balm to my ego because after being called chubby and sweaty by the boy you're crushing on, I felt like 10 inches high.
"Hey, what you doing in there so long, boy? Your phone's out here so I know you're not texting like some little girl!"
God! I roll my eyes but grin anyway because although Az can be a giant pain in the butt, I would not trade him for anyone else right now. You have to take your friends as you get them, warts and all.
"Awright, don't get your panties in a bunch, Baby A!" I mock him with the pet-name his mom had for him all those years ago and I walk out of the bathroom straight into a face full of pillow.
"'Baby A', my ass! Come over here and I'll show you 'Baby A'!"
We rough-house for a while until I accidentally roll over onto the phone. Then I remember that we're supposed to be heading out to the Bean… and Kurt.
"Shit, get your big ass off of me, Azimio! We're going to be late!"
Az sits up and then grins at me unrepentantly. Yeah, I know I sound ridiculous – and probably look it, too, because I'm trying to straighten my shirt and smooth down my hair as I jump up off the bed.
"Calm down, missy! Ladyface isn't going to give you detention if you're a couple minutes late – or is he into that kinky, role-playing shit?"
His raucous laughter follows me all the way down the stairs, even as I yell out "bye!" to my dad and we head for my truck. Jeez, is there a place you can trade in pain-in-the-ass best friends?
…
Kurt's POV
I pull my baby into my usual spot at the Bean and fix my hair in the rear-view mirror.
"Princess, you look fine. Can we get on with it?"
"Noah," I take a deep breath and say as sweetly as possible while opening my door. "Let me appeal to you in a way I know you'll understand. If you mess this up for me, I will get Sarah to let me in one night and I will shave your head!"
Finn and Santana have parked next to me so they hear my reply and laugh loudly as we all head for the front door.
"Fine! Don't get your panties in a wad!" Puck rolls his eyes.
Santana and I find a table off to the side while the boys go to get drinks. I'm more nervous today than I was last night.
"Tana, I-I'm kinda freakin' out right now," I whisper to her.
"Calm down, Hummel. What do you have to be nervous about? Didn't you already make it to third base?"
"What?" Finn screeches. He almost drops the drinks on the floor but Puck grabs the tray in the nick of time.
"Thanks, big mouth," I growl at her.
"Get over yourself, Finnocence! My best gay can get his groove on anytime he wants."
"I'm gonna kill him! That's what I'm gonna do," Finn starts muttering to himself as Puck pushes him into the booth and blocks his exit.
I narrow my eyes and hiss at Finn. "Finn, you will do no such thing! David was a perfect gentleman last night. Nothing happened that I didn't want to happen."
"Wanky."
"Tana! Stop it!" I count to ten in my head. "You know what, maybe you should all leave? I think you can meet up on some other day."
"Well, umm, I don't think so… you see, I may or may not have texted Blah and told him that we may or may not be here around 2:00." Santana has the nerve to look sheepish.
"Mother of Versace, no! Please, tell me you didn't!" I rub my temples as I can feel the headache coming on.
Just then I hear the door open. I look up to see David and Azimio standing in the doorway. I can't stop the smile that spreads across my face as I take in the way his eyes light up when he spots me. I stand up quickly and almost take a step forward. My fear, though, holds me in place for a moment. I'm not sure if he would want me to touch him – I mean we are in public but, more than that, he has Azimio with him.
…
Dave's POV
The Lima Bean isn't too busy at this time of day, maybe because most folks don't have to get up at the ass crack of dawn to go to work on a Saturday. Az and I had chatted the whole way there but, since pulling into the coffee shop's parking lot, I got real quiet.
I can feel the pulse in my throat beating faster than usual because, yeah, I'm nervous as hell. I swallow and take a swig of the water bottle my dad never lets me leave the house without. Oh god, he's going to be there… with a bunch of his friends, yet!
Az looks over and gives me a light punch to my arm, shaking me out of my head. "Dude, it's only Hummel… and the rest." His grin is unsympathetic to say the least but strangely enough it settles me anyway.
"Yeah," I say as I get out of the truck and lock it. Az falls into step just slightly behind me so that I end up going through the doors of the Bean first.
Inside it's cool and fairly quiet with that great coffee and pastry smell that I love. I can hear some laughter and chatting but suddenly I can distinguish Kurt's voice and I turn in that direction. I almost stumble as I look because… how is it possible for one person to look like all the light in the room is just on him alone?
I can feel Az's hand brush my back and I continue forward smoothly, hoping no one noticed the slight hesitation and then Kurt is right there, looking up at me with those big, wide, bright blue eyes. I see nothing but Kurt, sappy as that sounds… and then my eyes drop to his lips and ... that's it.
I don't realize at first that all that hooting and yelling is because I'm kissing Kurt. Nope, all I can think about is that slight gasp he makes just before our lips connect. I close my eyes when I see his dark lashes falling on his soft cheeks and I might have sighed, too. The kiss is soft and pretty brief but the feeling rockets down to the bottom of my feet and up again, making the top of my head tingle. The connection goes right through me like electricity and the hair on the back of my neck rises slightly.
I pull back slightly and look down at his flushed face and he's grinning at me, happy to see me, too. I smile back at him for a few seconds before looking up into the startled eyes of his brother and his friends. Whoops!
"Uhm, hi?"
I feel Kurt's forehead bump my shoulder before he leans back, giggling, and he's so sweet, so adorable, I want to kiss him again but I stop myself in time. Hudson makes a move, anyway, as if he wants to stop me from kissing his brother again but I feel Az shift beside me. I shake my head and then move forward, bringing Kurt with me. "Hi, guys," I say more clearly this time.
"Kurt! I don't_," Hudson doesn't get a chance to finish before Kurt turns to him with the most serious Ice-Queen face. He takes a step towards Finn and although Finn has nearly seven inches on him, he backs down before Kurt with a sheepish look.
Kurt, however, doesn't say anything and I have to bite back a grin when he turns the same look on Puckerman and then Tana. Finally he says in this sweet but kinda deadly voice: "The next thing out of anyone's mouth had better be 'Hi, Dave, hi, Azimio'!"
There were nods on the part of Hudson and Puckerman but Santana grins at me and winks. "I see my boy left his mark on you." She turns the smirk on Kurt. "Good work, Lady Lips; glad my training is paying off."
I cringe a little and look over at Kurt who simply rolls his eyes and turns to greet Azimio. "Hi, Azimio, glad you could join our lunch/homework party."
Az does his grunt thing which I suppose is meant to be "oh, yeah, thanks for having me" and then everyone is shuffling about and taking a seat. We finally end up with Kurt on one side of me, Tana on the other, with Az on her other side. Hudson and Puckerman end up opposite each other at the end of the booth. It's a tight fit but who am I to complain when Kurt's hand has managed to slide onto my knee and he's rubbing it unconsciously.
I think it's unconscious but then again, I'm not so sure as he turns his head to give me a tiny, private smile that has my eyes riveted to his lips. I might be so out of it after that kiss, that the others' conversation is just a buzz. I'm just happy to be where Kurt is.
…
Kurt's POV
I am desperately trying to keep myself from hyperventilating. That kiss was amazing! I'm so proud of him. He hasn't even freaked out or anything. Suddenly I am so sure I made the right decision; just being with David feels right. My hand finds its way to his knee and I'm rubbing gently. He looks really good.
"You look really nice, David. I love that shirt on you." I'm trying to be quiet for him only to hear.
Of course you know what they say about the best laid plans… Finn looks over at David and blurts out, "You need to respect my little bro, Karofsky. No more of your bullshit."
"What Frankenteen means, Karofsky," Puck butts in, "is that while we're all happy that you two have worked out your issues? We just want to make sure that you're good to each other," and he elbows Finn in the side, hard.
For a moment I'm speechless. Since when did Noah Puckerman have tact and decency? I shoot a glare at my brother.
"Finn…" I growl.
"It's okay, babe." David is smiling at me. "I would expect your brother and friends to want to make sure you're safe and cared for. I didn't treat you well in the past and I have a lot to make up for."
"That's sweet of you to say, David… but it's bullshit." I notice Tana and Az both smirking.
I turn to my brother. "Finn, I have forgiven you time and time again for being a jackass… and Noah, too. If I choose to forgive David and get on with my life, it isn't any of your business. David doesn't have to justify himself to anyone. Now, I would like to have a nice afternoon, get some homework done, and spend time with my boyfriend. Is that okay with everyone?" I drop as much sarcasm as I can into that last question.
"Boyfriend?" David whispers as he stares at me, eyes golden in the afternoon light. "Are you – Kurt, are you asking me to be your boyfriend?"
"Well, yes, but, umm," I sigh, "I didn't mean to ask like that – or in front of everyone. I understand if you want some time to think about it. It's no secret I'm a little high-maintenance, David."
Santana and Azimio start cracking up. Noah is chuckling, too, but trying to hide it behind his drink. Finn just keeps staring at the two of us, alternating between his gassy-infant look and narrowed eyes.
"'A little high-maintenance', Lady Lips? Ha! That's like saying the Queen of England is just an old lady!" Santana's cackle was attracting attention. "You're like the biggest bitch I know, well, next to Quinny."
Azimio chimes in with his two cents as well. "If you do this, D, you're definitely going to have your hands full!"
I was about to let Tana and Az have it when David blurts loudly, "Yes!"
I look at him cautiously. "What?"
…
Dave's POV
I don't care how stupid I look right now with my big head nodding like a bobble-head dog's but Kurt Hummel just asked me to be his boyfriend! Kurt. Hummel.
"Yes!" It's a little softer but just as intense and I turn in the tight spot so that I'm staring directly into Kurt's amazing eyes. They are wide and so blue, hardly any of the other colors are showing. I could stare at them forever. "Yes."
"There you go, Hummel; my boy said that damn 'yes' three times already!"
Az's voice startles me slightly but I'm still staring at Kurt … and then I just lean in and kiss him again. It can barely qualify as a kiss but the feel of those soft, plush lips against mine still makes my breath come short.
I pull back and look at him. His eyes are closed and he has a soft smile that just barely curves those full pink lips. God, I could just keep looking at him and not eat or sleep or anything. The dark thick lashes flutter and then those eyes are boring into me and I can only smile, too.
I'm suddenly aware that his soft palm is against the side of my face and just as I tilt my head further against it, I hear an awful retching sound. Suddenly Puckerman's voice yells and Kurt's hand falls away.
"What is wrong with you, Lopez?"
I look to see Puck glaring at Satan as she goes to make that retching sound again. The look on her face is mischievous as she stares at Kurt and me. I realize what's going on as I hear Az burst into loud guffaws, drawing the attention of the few other patrons in the place.
"I'm gagging on all the damn fairy dust flying around here, Mohawk!" Her words are harsh but there is still a twinkle in her eye and a soft smile on her lips. "I mean, come on, if Rainbow Bright and Holly Hobby had illegitimate love children, they would still be less gay than these two."
Finn groans and face-palms while Noah shakes his head at Tana, fighting not to laugh. Azimio is just cracking up.
…
Kurt's POV
I look over at David and he's got that look that says he's not sure if he should laugh or be mad at Santana. That's when I realize he will fit in just fine. Santana and Noah are the type of people who will insult you and give you endless piles of crap, but no one is fiercer, more loyal or loving once you get past their walls. I suspect Azimio is quite the same way. Finn, well… Finn is just Finn. There's no explaining it. You just have to get used to it. My lips start to twitch and before I can stop it, I'm laughing just as hard as the others. David joins in when he realizes I'm not upset.
As I finally stop laughing, I look over at her. "Well, Tana, I guess no one knows more about what goes on with lesbian bitches in heat than you. I guess I'll have to take your word for it." I smirk at her.
"Damn right, glitter fairy, and don't forget it." Tana smirks back at me before we start laughing all over again.
"Dude, are they allowed to say stuff like that to each other?" Finn asks Puck, looking a little worried.
"Those two are crazy bitches when they're together; so as long as their claws aren't directed at me – I don't give a shit what they say," Puck replied. "But, yes, Finn, they are joking around with each other."
I stood up. "Okay, I'm going to get sandwiches for everyone. Tana, you want the usual, right?" She nods her head 'yes'. "Finn, Noah, the same, or are you feeling adventurous?"
"Nah, Princess, I'll take the usual."
"Me too, bro. Oh, can you get some of those cookies? And maybe some of those muffins too?"
I just roll my eyes at him. "Azimio, what would you like?"
"I'll go with you, babe." David stands up. "I know what Az usually gets."
"Okay." I smile at him as he takes my hand. "Everyone good on drinks?" They all mumble affirmatives.
David and I head to the counter and place our orders. We both reach for our wallets at the same time.
"I got it, David. There are more of my friends eating."
"Well, Tana's kind of mine, too. Puck and I haven't had any issues that weren't related to you, so he's my friend as well."
"Alright." I laugh as I put up my hands in surrender. "How about we split it, 50/50?"
"Sure, babe."
We both hand over our credit cards to the cashier and she smiles back at us. "You two are such a cute couple!"
David beams one of his million-dollar smiles at her and says, "Thanks!"
It takes three trays to carry everything, especially with all of Finn's extras. I'm pretty sure between feeding Finn and Azimio, David and I could go broke.
Lunch is good, though, and everyone is laughing and joking around. I'm pretty much on cloud nine the whole afternoon. I have completely forgotten Tana texted Blaine we would be here until I hear a throat clearing. I have my head resting on David's shoulder while he has an arm around my waist.
When I raise my head, I find Blaine standing there, glaring at the group.
"Well, look who's here, Princess, it's the hobbit." Puck glares right back at Blaine.
"Welcome to the party, gay Fonzie," Santana smirks. "What are we celebrating, you might ask? We're celebrating the new power couple, of course."
I face-palm and let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. I should've known those two would attack like rabid dogs since they never liked Blaine much anyway. I'm not about to hide my relationship with David, but I would've told him in a better way.
"Knock it off, guys." I try to smile at Blaine but he's shooting daggers at David with his eyes.
"How could you, Kurt? How could you let that-that sweaty, chubby monster touch you! After everything he's done to you?!" Blaine's voice starts soft but is increasing in volume.
"Oh, hell no! Look, helmet head, no one talks about my boy like that!" Azimio starts to get out of his chair.
"Az, sit down." David doesn't yell but he gets Azimio's attention.
Azimio looks at him for a moment before sitting back down with his arms crossed as he glares at Blaine.
Puck starts in on Blaine again. "Dude, you are the last one to talk about hurting Princess. Ever since you met him you've been hurting him. What with that douche move at the Gap, no solos with the Garglers… Oh! And let's not forget making out with Rachel in front of him – you have no room to talk!" That last one earns a growl from Finn.
"You people have no idea what Kurt and I meant to each other!" Blaine tries to sound dignified but it's not working, given that one eye is twitching and his voice is shaking. "Kurt has never said I was hurting him!"
"Plus, you Lance Bass wannabe, you've continued to hurt him even after following him to McKinley," Santana sneers. "You stole his spotlight numerous times, dimmed his shiny glitterness, and forced him into the role of supporting your spoiled, selfish ass!" Santana wasn't pulling any punches.
Blaine's mouth falls open but then he gathers himself and snarls, "I deserve the spotlight because I'm that good, as if you would know anything about it!" He flinches as Tana makes a sudden move but she laughs and sits back smugly. I look up when Finn decides to jump in.
"Blaine, my brother has a good heart and sure, most of the time he cares too much and always let's people get away with shit they shouldn't, but those are reasons why we love him. You use that against him instead of celebrating it. That's not being a good boyfriend."
Well, that was a shock, especially coming from Finn.
"You know, if my boy here didn't think so much of Lady Lips' feelings, I'd walk all over your punk ass right now," Azimio says, staring menacingly at Blaine who maybe for the first time realizes he's facing a pretty hostile crowd.
I look around and notice that the few other patrons in the place are staring, rapt, at our little unfolding drama. I don't really care, though, because I feel good that my friends are defending me when at one time I thought they all liked Blaine more than me.
Suddenly David squeezes my hand and then clears his throat. Everyone's eyes turn to him immediately and I notice that Blaine's lips tighten but he says nothing, just waits.
"I had a lot of issues to deal with, Anderson, but you actually had a good thing and totally ignored it."
There were nods all around and I feel myself blush, my eyes prickling at the quiet, intense way David is speaking. I smile at him when his eyes turn to me and suddenly everyone else is looking at us, no one speaking.
"Kurt has a huge heart, that's why he manages to forgive us – you, me, his brother, Puckerman – and we don't deserve it. I can only believe that he sees something in us that is better than we can see."
Suddenly he gets this scary seriousness to him and I hold my breath. "Kurt has broken up with you and he's chosen me. So, you know what's gonna happen now?"
There was not a sound to be heard in the Bean and Blaine pales at the look in David's eyes. He shakes his head as it seems that David is waiting for a response. David simply nods once and continues.
"What's gonna happen is that you won't ever approach him again, ever. You had your chance and you screwed up. All those days leading up to Valentine's, you never gave him one gift. I gave him gifts the whole time, every day, and he thought they were all from you."
"Dude!" That was Puck and Azimio together.
"Wait, those were from you?!" Finn's voice is awed as he stares at David in admiration. I roll my eyes but feel myself blushing as I nod, confirming what Finn had said.
There is slight color in David's cheeks, too, but he nods as well.
"That was some romantic shit," Tana says proudly.
David sorts of hunches his shoulders and then stares back at Blaine. "There was no excuse for you not to give Kurt at least one gift – if you really loved him."
"I-I gave him a gift… I sang a song for him at Breadstix…," Blaine is looking at me.
I know I have to say something.
"Blaine, yes, you sang that night but it wasn't for me or even to me. It wasn't a romantic love song. It wasn't even an 'I wanna get laid' song. It was you performing to a crowd I happened to be in, just like always. That night, before you showed up, David was there – he poured out his heart to me, made me feel cared for – loved. I turned him away … for you … foolishly thinking you were the right choice. Then you show up and I didn't even get a hello before you started performing."
"Douche move, dude," Puck sneers, glaring at Blaine who swallows hard and takes a step back.
Blaine looks at me, slight pleading in his eyes but I don't find him appealing anymore. Whatever I'd felt for him is like a pale imitation to the feelings coursing through me at the thought of David loving me.
"Blaine, I'm sorry that you had to come here… and face this," I start to say and I hold up my hand to stop him from interrupting. "I'm better than being second best… and that's what I'll always be with you."
His face crumples and maybe one time that would have moved me, but not anymore. "But Kurt, please?"
Santana suddenly gets to her feet and Blaine flinches again. "Is anybody else as tired of this lame scene as I am?" She glares around at the table and I try to hold back a giggle. David squeezes my hand and I lay my head back on his shoulder, effectively dismissing Blaine.
Puck shrugs and turns to Finn. "Dude, I didn't finish kicking your ass at Call of Duty. Let's head out."
Tana turns to me and David with a little smirk. "There's just too much glitter fairy dust in here – affecting my allergies. You want a lift, He-Man?" She lifts one imperious eyebrow in Azimio's direction and like the horndog he is, he leaps quite agilely out of the booth to stand beside her.
"Hey, Big D, you good?" Although he's addressing David he's sort of glaring at Blaine who isn't stupid.
Blaine apparently realizes that Santana, Azimio, Puck and Finn are looming around him. He turns. "Uhm, Kurt, I-I'll just go and, uhm…" and then he dashes out of the Bean, laughter following him.
…
TBC
