Connie hadn't moved from her bed all of that Sunday morning. Her father was out at the local bar, drinking his pain away like he always did that time of year. The anniversary of her mother's dead.
Mary Jane Moreau had died nine years ago to the day. Connie could remember like it was yesterday – being pulled out of class by the principal to see her grandmother on the verge of tears, only to have her lead Connie outside gently. She'd gotten to the hospital and her father collapsed into her arms. Her mother was in a car accident and had died in the operating room.
She did the same thing every year on the anniversary. She laid in bed and stared at the wall all day, only getting up to eat and pee. She felt guilty doing anything else. The first year, Charlie had come to visit her. The two of them used to be a lot closer when they were younger, since all the other boys picked on Charlie and she was the only girl. His mother had sent him with a casserole and Charlie sat on the edge of her bed with his legs crossed and talked forever about stupid things. It was a bit annoying, but she appreciated it. Every other year after that, it had been Guy who'd come over. He never said anything, just sat right next to her, stroking her hair. Connie had been thinking about this day for weeks and she expected that Guy wouldn't be coming. He still came when they broke up, but that was before Alexa.
But to her surprise, at eleven am, as if on the dot, there was a knock at her front door exposing Guy, holding a box of Chips Ahoy and smiling shyly. Connie felt a bit embarrassed when she saw him – she was still wearing her pajamas and her hair was a mess, that never bothered her before and she didn't know why it was bothering her now – and she crossed her arms over her chest. "What are you doing here?"
He looked at her like she was crazy, "I always come today,"
Connie wanted to say "What about Alexa?" but she didn't. She didn't want to bring up Alexa right now. She just shrugged and moves for him to come in but Guy stops her. "No, uh, I was thinking maybe we could do something different today,"
"Guy, I just – I really just want to lie down,"
"Yeah, I know. But, you always do that and you always end up feeling like shit at the end of the day anyway. I was thinking maybe today we could go to the park. I uh, I borrowed my dad's van. Thought maybe we could have a picnic – well not an actual picnic, just like sit in the back with the doors open, pull it up right by the pond,"
Connie stared at him while she thought about the prospect. It would be just like a date, just like the kind of thing they did when they were kids. She quickly shook her head, "I – I don't know,"
"C'mon, Connie. It'll be nice to spend the day together. We don't even have to talk if you don't want to,"
It was a nice day out . . . and Guy was smiling so sweetly, and she loved his parents' van and he'd brought her her favorite dessert . . . "Alright, I guess it could be fun. Um, just give me a sec to get dressed, okay?"
Guy smiled and waited. Connie came out wearing ratty jeans and an old t shirt she'd gotten from the Goodwill Games. Guy jokingly offered her his hand and she took it, fake curtsying. The two of them drove three blocks to the park that they'd visited practically every day as kids. Today, it was full of parents with their own young ones running around the lake, playing on the playground or just going for a walk. Guy parked in the parking lot closest to the lake and opened up the back of the van so that he and Connie could watch the ducks and the geese in the water. He'd brought along a basket containing two sandwiches, apples and juice boxes.
They sat there eating for a bit, Connie leaning up against one of the walls of the van staring out at the scenery and Guy playing with a loose piece of fabric on his sweats. It was about fifteen minutes before Connie finally spoke. "I fucked Connor Benson last night,"
Guy looked up at her, surprised by her bluntness and then shrugged. "So? Why are you telling me?"
"I don't know," she said and she really didn't. She scratched her arm, uncomfortable. "I was . . . I was really sad last night. You know, we lost the game on Friday and then I came home from Julie's dorm and my dad was drunk and I was just . . . pissed, I guess. I called Connor. He, uh, he's been bothering me a lot in school lately. Laughing at me in class, but I know him. And I know he's single and desperate so he picked me up and we went back to his dorm and . . . you can figure out the rest. He offered to take me home but I walked. Maybe I shouldn't be telling you this because we don't really talk about these things but I feel bad. I promised Julie I wasn't going to be a whore this year,"
"You're not a whore, Connie," Guy said quietly.
"Then how come everyone says I am?" she pulled her legs up to her chest.
Guy shrugged again. "I don't know. I guess they need something to talk about. You're an easy target. You're on the Ducks, you're a great player. Everyone knows you, it's just easy for them to pick on you,"
Connie picked up a cookie and ate it, trying to relax her shoulders. "I guess so,"
He noticed that she was uneasy. "What?"
"I just – it's not just strangers who say those things. It's the Ducks too. I mean just last week, I was talking about my dad and Averman comes in asking me if he knows that I fucked his boss's son. I mean, I was fourteen when that happened! And like a few days before that, Portman made a crack that the only reason I even get playing time is because I'm sleeping with Orion. I just don't get it, Guy. I mean, I know I'm a bitch but the team is my family. After – after my mom died, the team was all I had. They are all I have. And they're mean to me, but when I'm mean to them, suddenly I'm an awful person,"
Guy sighed heavily and leaned forward, putting his hand on her knee. She put her own on top of it. "Connie . . . I'm sorry."
"It's not your fault. It's not even their fault. I'm just being too sensitive," she wiped a non existant tear from her eye. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought this up,"
"You brought it up because you're sad about your mom and you need someone to be mad at. So you're mad at yourself," he moved from across from her to next to her and put an arm around her. She immeaditely put her head on his shoulder. "You don't need to be angry, Connie. You're just living your life. You're not hurting anyone."
Connie started crying then. She never cried, hadn't done it since the first time she saw her father drinking when she was ten. She didn't even cry at Hans's funeral. But here she was, whimpering in Guy's arms for no other reason than Guy himself. She lifts her head from his shoulder and takes his hand. "Guy . . . Guy, I love you,"
His eyes widen because she's not saying it as a friend, he can see that from the look in her eyes. "I'm in love with you and I've been trying to hide it for . . . probably since we broke up, but I'm just realizing it now,"
Guy pulled away from her gently, not wanting to upset her even further on such an important anniversary in her life. "Connie . . . I – I'm flattered, but I'm with –"
"Alexa, I know. And she's really, really amazing, Guy. You're really lucky and I'm not telling you this so you'll leave her for me because I don't want you to. I just want you to be happy. You deserve it. I needed to tell you that, though. I needed to get it off my chest,"
Julie had spent the entire weekend worrying about her friends. After the game on Friday, she'd went to Adam's house to check on him, only to be told that he wanted to be alone by his parents. She'd gotten back to her dorm to see Jessica waiting in front of her room, asking desperately if Adam was alright and Julie couldn't give her an answer and she sent Jessica away in tears. Then the next day, Connie had come over and the two of them had spent the day walking around campus and then Julie had braided her hair while they watched reruns of The Hogan Family. She knew what tomorrow was for Connie and was concerned for her, but knew that her friend liked to keep to herself on those days.
But by Sunday, she was back to being worried about Adam. He was the most quiet, gentle person she'd ever known in her life and him having an outburst like that was just plain out of character. Usually when he was upset, he came to her and they talked things out but she hadn't heard from since Friday. She'd pretty much just been sitting around trying to come up with an explanation for his behavior and the only one that she was able to come to was Charlie and Linda. It was the only thing that made sense – the guys had been talking about them before the game and Linda had been there, flirting with Charlie after the first period. It wasn't like Adam to get angry or jealous, but it was the most likely.
So Julie took a bus across town to Charlie's apartment building. She figured that if she couldn't get Adam to talk to her, then Charlie could get him to talk to him. She knocked on his front door and Charlie opened it. He looked exhausted and Julie could see his stepfather and mother behind him, his stepfather with his feet kicked up and Charlie's mother serving him.
"Oh, uh, hey Julie," said Charlie, surprised to see her.
"Hi, Charlie. Um, I was wondering if we can talk?"
Charlie looked behind him, like he wanted to stay but shrugged and closed the door behind him. "Sorry, I would've let you in but now's not really a good time."
"Right. I should've called. It'll only take a minute anyway,"
Charlie stared at her and Julie stared back at him and Charlie said "What?" like he was waiting for her to continue.
"I need you to talk to Adam,"
His next words came out a bit breathlessly, "Oh, yeah. How is he, anyway?"
"I don't know. I haven't seen him since he left the game," Julie crossed her hands. "Which is why I was hoping that maybe you could call him or go over to his house. I think he needs some cheering up,"
Charlie seemed fidgety, nervous, and she'd never really seen him like that but then again, she'd never been to his house. "Why can't you talk to him? You're his best friend,"
She wasn't about to tell Charlie that Adam was madly in love with him and hearing from him would cheer him up more than Julie ever could. "You're his captain. I just think you could talk sense into him more than I could,"
"Adam and I . . . we don't really talk about stuff like that. You know, problems outside of hockey. I wouldn't know what to say."
"You're smart, Charlie. You'll figure something out," Julie smiled. In reality, she knew that Charlie wasn't really all that smart. He just cared a lot about people and was always ready to help. But just hearing from Charlie would probaby make Adam feel a lot better, and hearing that Charlie cared how he was doing would lift him up entirely.
Charlie thought about it for a minute and then shrugged. "Alright, Julie. I'll uh, I'll talk to him at school tomorrow."
Julie smiled and put an appreciative hand on Charlie's arm. "Thank you,"
He nodded. "Yeah, yeah,"
"Alright, well, I'm uh, I'm gonna go. Sorry again for barging in," she said, backing away from him towards the exit.
He waved at her and walked back inside. "Yep,"
As soon as Charlie closed the door, Jim started yelling about something. His mother looked concerned. "Yo, Charlie, can you please tell your mother that she doesn't need to be working tonight? It's Sunday for God's sake,"
"Hun, I have to work tonight. Shelley's on vacation and she needs for me to take her shift," Casey explained.
"Yeah, fucking right! No one else could fucking do it?"
"No. I told her that I would do it,"
Jim turned to Charlie like he was going to take his side. "You hear this shit, kid? She told her she would do it,"
Charlie said nothing, didn't even bother to roll his eyes and just walked into his room. He'd come out if any yelling started, but for now he was just gonna do his English homework. He couldn't leave the house that much because of the whole situation, the best thing he could do for himself was get to have some alone time. Although he'd prefer if this alone time could be with Linda, but he didn't let her come over to his house just so she didn't have to see or hear his family disaster.
The Ducks arrived to their before school practice at 6 AM Monday Morning, all of them exhausted and a few of them hungover. No one said anything to Adam when they walked in and saw him there first (even Julie just sat next to him and said nothing). Most of them were in a quiet mood and it was more about the disappointment of their first loss of the season than how tired they were.
However, as soon as Orion walked into the locker room all of that ended. He looked angrier than any of them had ever seen him and they all quit their moping and complaining instantly. He crossed his arms over his chest. "We were supposed to have this practice because we needed it after that loss on Friday. But something else has come to my attention. I was taking the garbage out in here so that the janitors wouldn't have to do it and I discovered this," Orion reached into the pocket of his jacket and pulled out a small bag of white powder.
The Ducks looked around at each other, confused. The always innocent Dwayne raised his hand. "Sorry coach, but what is that?"
Orion sighed. "This, Dwayne, is cocaine. An extremely dangerous drug that I discovered in this locker room after a game. Which means that at least one of you was under the influence of drugs during a game. Do any of you have any comprehension of just how serious this is?! You could get kicked off the team, you could get kicked out of school! I am not making accusations but I am giving you until the end of the week to come to me and confess who it was. Once the week is up, I'm reporting this to Dean Buckley."
Orion stared at them sternly, causing some of them to swallow down an awkward lump in their throats. "I expect to see all of you on the ice in ten minutes," he turned swiftly and walked out.
The Ducks were quiet for only a few moments before Russ said "I know one of y'all better tell him it was you because I'm not losing my scholarship,"
"You got something to say Banksy?" said Luis.
Adam looked up, "What are you talking about?"
"Your little outburst on Friday would explain a lot if you were high," Averman agreed.
"I wasn't – I wasn't high, I swear I wasn't!" Adam responded, obviously distressed by the accusation. "Drug test me if you need to, I swear to God I wasn't on anything,"
"I'll take you up on the drug testing offer," said Russ.
"Guys, come on," said Connie. "Let's not accuse anyone of anything,"
"Oooh," Goldberg chuckled. "You covering for me or something, Connie?"
Portman laughed. "Yeah, man, she's probably banging Adam and doesn't want her fuck buddy getting busted,"
Connie didn't say anything and she didn't even look all that upset, but Guy knew from their conversation their other day that she was. "Shut the fuck up, Portman,"
Portman stood up. "What'd you just say, Germaine?"
"You heard me! I'm getting really tired of all of you and your comments! Just shut up and leave her alone, okay?"
Charlie immeaditely ran over and stood between the two of them in case a fight broke out. "Hey, hey, hey, we're cool guys, alright? We're cool. Let's just . . . go out on the ice. I know we're all upset because of the loss but fighting isn't going to make anything better. You're smart enough to know that,"
Portman rolled his eyes and slowly backed off Guy and although there were a few annoyed mumbles from Russ, the team continued getting dressed.
Slowly, they all made there way out of the locker room with only Charlie and Adam being left in there. Charlie had planned on staying behind to speak to Adam quickly and pulled him aside before he could leave. "Hey man, I'm uh, sorry about them," he said.
Adam bit his lip. "It's cool,"
"Look, if it helps, I know that the drugs aren't yours. I know you wouldn't do that," Charlie put a hand on Adam's shoulder and he caught a small smile from the other boy. "But I just wanted to make sure you were okay,"
Adam shrugged. "I'm fine,"
"Are you sure? Cause you were pretty upset on Friday,"
"Yeah, I don't know what came over me," he shrugged. "But I'm okay now,"
Charlie didn't want to push the issue so he just nodded. "Okay. Cool. Uh, if you ever need to talk to anyone though, I'm here. You know that right?"
Adam got a look on his face that Charlie didn't recognize and he blushed before saying, "Yeah, yeah, I do. Thanks, Charlie."
"Any time, buddy,"
Author's Note: So . . . yeah. Lots of drama. This was a pretty intense chapter in my own mind, and I don't know if it came across like that! Who do you think really had the cocaine?
