We were done shopping after about 5 hours, we placed our goods into my truck then they dragged me towards the hair salon.

"I really don't want anyone doing my hair, more than likely they don't know how to do my kind of hair."

"Don't be silly Kangen; we're just getting our feet done."

Kim says as she drags me to the place, I let out a little sigh, glad that I don't have to take this wig off. It took them forever and I was growing very impatient as the hour went by and the women that were doing our feet were talking about the three of us in a language they thought that none of us knew. So I began to talk to them in one of my native tongues . . . in Korean, they were so shocked that they even gave us a 15 dollar discount; I for one was happy about that.

"Can we go eat now; I haven't had any food since the boys came and fetched me."

"Sure thing, there's a nice looking Korean restaurant that I always wanted to try just around the corner."

"Oh I have been so far away from Korean food for far too long let's get going!"

They both laugh at my sudden outburst of hyper-ness as I skipped up ahead of them and found the restaurant, and it was one of those places that I love! The one where you cook your own food, I just love it . . . along with the side dishes that you get too; it's like heaven in your mouth! I waited for them by the door and went in and talked to the lady in that same language; we took our shoes off and sat on little pillow like things and we order some beef kale-be something that I know that they'll like . . . sometime later after we stuffed ourselves we went to watch a movie, then went home; I dropped Kim off at her place first, so she can drop off her stuff, and get the stuff that she needs to sleep over at my place; then we went to Emily's house and we had to stay there a little longer since all the boys were there and by the looks of it really hungry. So the three of us made them some food; just as we were finishing up on the cooking my phone began to sing (ring) "Quit bendin' all my fingo quit beating my like you're ringo, you wanna go? You wanna win a war? Like P.L.O. I don't surrendo the sun showers that fall on my troubles are you over my baby . . ."

Jacob answered it for me as I washed my hands and dried them, I know who it was that was calling me, and I took the phone from him.

"Appa! (Brother in Korean) It's about time that you call, what have you been up to where you couldn't call me for the past 5 weeks after my birthday!?"

"Well I was going to call, but I got a little busy."

"You use that line one to many times, I'm not like those stupid chicks that you normally pick up that hang on to your every word!"

"All right, all right just stop screaming in the phone, who the hell was that, that picked up the phone?"

"Oh, that was Jacob, why?"

"Why the hell do you have someone else; a boy at that picking up your phone?! You two better not be alone, because if you are Jacob has another thing coming to him!"

This time he screams into the phone, I leave out of the kitchen, and speak in Tagalong this time.

"For one you're the one that's screaming right now! Two because I was in the middle of cooking when you called, and three we are not alone in-fact I'm at a friends house for right now; and he was the one who was one of my first friends and keep me happy since you're not here to do so, yet alone call me! And one last thing what the FUCK would I do something like that with some dude that I don't know all that well?!"

There was a long pause after that rant, he took a deep sigh and began to speak.

"I'm sorry Kangen, I'm just a little on the edge . . . the reason why I haven't called you, is because . . . because . . ."

"Would you just hurry up and spit it out already; stop it with the stupid stuttering!"

"It's because I was getting ready to go off to Iraq for 3 years at most . . . *my heart stopped beating* I was trying to have them lower the time that I'll be there, but right now they need all that men they can get their hands on right now . . . Kangen, I'll send someone that we both trust over there to watch over you while I'm gone, OK? . . . Kangen? Kangen you there?!"

His words began to fade out and there was a huge lump in my throat I ended up pulling my hair . . . I mean my wig off in an attempt to cool my body off.

"Ryan, just promise me one thing . . . *he makes a sad little noise* Just come back in one piece . . . alive; can you do that one little thing for me?"

Another long pause I think I was starting to hyperventilate because I couldn't hear anything really. All that I really could hear was my heart beat in my head . . . then I was forced back when he screamed my name.

"Did you hear anything that I said?"

"No, I think I was hyperventilating for a moment there, what did you say?"

"I said that I will try my best to keep that promise; and try to stay out of trouble, since I'm not there to bail you out again . . . I'm pretty sure that your new friends don't want to use their money to get your dumb ass out of jail."

"Hey, hey I had a perfectly good reason why I was there and you know it!"

He laughs and I just notice what he was trying to do, distract me from the pain that was going through me not too long ago into something that I can laugh about.

"Well I just wanted to talk to you before I got on the plane, which is about to leave in a few, I love you Kangen; take care."

"Bye-bye Ryan good luck, I love you big bro! You better come back in one piece I mean it."

All that heard before a click was his light laughter. He may not be that dependable, but he was there when you really needed him the most, just too bad I won't be able to see him for about three years.

"I'll miss you big brother."

I whispered to the dial tone; I got up and walked back into the kitchen faking a smile as I placed my phone back in my bag, I felt their stares on me as I went to the stove to finish up the rest of the food. I was trying my best to hold it all in . . . keep it bottled up till I was alone, but luck wasn't on my side tonight, little tears started to fall, I started to shake, but try to control myself. Emily took me out of the room and into the small bathroom with Kim in tow; as soon as that door closed I broke down crying, sobbing holding onto them for dear life. Emily was rubbing my hair that was free from the wig and Kim was rubbing my back.

"We kind of heard some of what you were talking about Kan."

Kim said in a whisper as she too was hugging me.

"I'm sorry this has to happen now of all times."

Emily says as she continues to stroke my hair, I just grip them tighter.

"I don't want to lose him too, I don't want to lose him like I lost my dad to this stupid war! He's all I got, my older brother, I need him, and he needs me. He can't even wash his own clothes for Christ sake! Why do they have to send him out, why now of all times?! Wasn't my father enough for them?! We don't have to keep doing this, it . . . it's pointless!"

The two shush me and rock me back and forth till I was clam; we were in the small bathroom for a good hour, I cleaned my face off and blew my nose which is now a little red. The boys were sitting in the living room, the food untouched still on the stove, at least they turned off the stove. I turned it back on and finished cooking and set the table for them as I sat by myself in the living room flipping through the channels, not really paying much attention to what was on and what wasn't. It took me a while to realized that someone was sitting next to me, their body heat was really, really hot compared to mines. I didn't bother to look up, I just kept clicking the next button.

"If you want to talk about it with me, I could help . . . I know how you feel, I really do."

I look up with glass stained eyes into Jacob's deep dark black ones; it was hard for me to say no to him, shyly I scooted closer to him; he pulled me closer carefully, as if I really was breakable, just like how I feel. He really is a good listener, and even wiped my tears away; then he picked me up and sat me down on his lap, I didn't object to it, I just laid my head down on him taking in his scent quietly.

"You know, you have such pretty hair, I always wonder why you hid it under that wig of yours."

"It was because my brother told me to, said it would be wise if I did that; not that many Americans are use to people having this many colors in one person's hair."

"That's silly, I like it. I think it makes you look even cuter."

I blush when he said that and the next thing that I know I was being shaken awake by Jacob, Emily had her stuff ready and I hugged Jacob and left quietly; the drive there was quiet minus that fact that I was playing music from my iPod, the song that I made my older brother's ring tone; I was singing along with it another song came on and the three of us began to sing it, even the dogs wanted to get in on it. Even though I pulled up to my house we didn't get out till the song was over; I felt slightly better, even more so since I talked to Jake. We set up our little area in the living room; we grabbed games, movies, a boatload of junk food, and most of all ice cream so that way I can feel a lot better. I gave my babies some vanilla ice cream the I put them upstairs in my room, we watched movies while eating straight out of the carton, then had some truth or dare coming on.

"Ok Kan, truth or dare?"

"Let's see . . . Dare since I did truth last time."

" . . . I dare you to run around outside butt naked yelling at the top of your lungs the 'I'm so pretty' song!"

"I guess you must not know me so well Kimmy-chan! I'm way ahead of you!"

I said to her taking off the last bit of my clothes and dashing out of my house bouncing, prancing, twirling, skipping, and running in the freaking cold yelling at the top of my lungs the song I was told to do, then went back in the house holding onto my cold form trying to warm up; I put my clothes on in a hurry and we get back in our little area.

"Ok, so um Emily, truth or dare love?"

My guess that the look in my eye gave me away, because she chose the one that I didn't want her to choose.

"Truth!"

"Damn it! OK well let's see . . . how did you and Sam met?"

I saw her tense up a little and just as I was about to open my mouth . . .

"We met through my cousin, Leah and we clicked ever since then."

"Ok Kim truth or dare?"

And this went on and on and on and on till I finally chose truth and I wish that I hadn't.

"OK what do you think about our little Jake?"

"What do you mean 'think about' him?"

"Feeling wise girl come keep up."

"No need to bite my head off Kimmy-chan; well . . . um *blush* you guys promise not to tell? *they nod* I think he's hot, not just body heat wise, I take that back I think he's sexy."

We all laugh, ending our really long game of truth or dare and went on to play games, and watched movies, passing out somewhere in the middle of the movie.