Hooray! The ever awaited update is finally here. Please enjoy it, because I'm not gonna post another one till next Wednesday. Hahahaha. Suckers. Sorry…Anywhoooo…thanks to anybody who read my new story, Sometime Around Midnight (sorry, Thea) and if you haven't read it yet, GO READ IT!!! I COMMAND YOU!
Foshizzle! I don't know why I felt the urge to say that…
Shout outs to: Jihu! Thea! Becky! Ali! Boys Over Flowers (Dammit! I'm obsessed!) Erm…Trucker Robert Jackson Cam Kartik Ovaltine (shut up, Thea! I'm not gonna write my last name!) And…everyone else!
"That soon? Said spoon? Jesse? Ach! Womb! Raise the pleasure No my, no my "A" no my, no my "A" no my, no my, no my "A" Keep it down, Ragu sledding! Yay! Now I'm impressed, oh, key pay! You be the man who mashed the feta cheese." When you're done reading this, go to You tube, and type in "Numa Numa Misheard Lyrics." I promise, it's hilarious.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything.
Please Enjoy! AND, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, REVIEW!!!
BPOV
Finally. After four days, I was able to leave the hospital with a clean bill of health. Edward was still being pissy, but I think I had a few tricks to get him in a good mood. I was planning on using one of them tonight.
The day after I woke up, Charlie came in to visit me. He brought the one person I really didn't want to see. Jacob Black. His father, Billy Black, is like an uncle to me. I love him just about as much as I love Charlie. I didn't even like Jacob. He and I dated from 7th to 9th grade. He would trash me around treat me like shit, and he never really seemed to give a fuck about me. I stayed with him, because I really thought we could work it out. I was horribly mistaken. I never wanted to see him again, but since his dad and my dad are best friends foeva, I have to see a lot of him. Fuck my life.
"Hey Bella!" Billy's cavernous voice was so soothing. I couldn't help the grin on my face. He chuckled and rolled over to my bed. "Hey, Billy. How are you doing?" He quirked an eyebrow at me. "Really, Bella? You're in a hospital bed, and you're asking me how I'm doing?" I recognized the irony, and tittered a little to myself. Nodding, I said, "That doesn't answer my question. How are you?" He rolled his eyes, "I'm fine, Bella. 'How are you?' is the more important question." I smiled, "Well, this isn't the first time I've ever been in a hospital, and I have to say this was probably my easiest visit. I mean, I was unconscious for most of the time…" This made Edward growl a little under his breath. I rolled my eyes. God, he can be so overdramatic.
I heard Charlie mutter something to Billy, and the two of them left soon after, leaving me alone with Edward, Alice, and Jacob. Jazz, Rose, and Em were down at the vending machines. Emmett went down there alone, first, but came back up, saying "The fucking stupid vending machine ATE MY DOLLAR AND DIDN"T GIVE IT BACK!" I couldn't help but laugh at that. Rose and Jasper had to go back down with him, and show him the proper vending machine/dollar technique.
Alice's phone rang, and she flipped it open. "Hello?" her shrill, unmistakable voice greeted whoever was on the other line. She grimaced and apologized with her eyes as she pointed to the door. I nodded, allowing her to take the call outside. She exited, and the room became even quieter than before.
We all sat in awkward silence. Well, I was lying down in bed, Edward was sitting next to me, and Jacob stood standing in the middle of the doorway. I decided to just ignore him, and talk to Edward. I was still trying to soothe him. I turned on my side, and looked into Edward's eyes. I could see the anger he was trying to hide. He wasn't really trying very hard. I grinned a little bit at the thought of Edward beating up Jacob. My mind raced with different scenarios.
What if…Jacob walked into the room, sat down on the bed, grabbed my face, and kissed me. Kissed me hard. Edward would get up, punch Jacob strait in the nose, and begin kicking him on the floor.
What if…Jacob came in and asked, "Bella, who's he?" I would tell him, "Well, Jacob, this is my boyfriend Edward. We're actually in love, and he wouldn't do anything to hurt me. Ever." Edward would, of course, agree, and kiss me on the forehead. Then Jacob would have a pissy fit, which would cause Edward to kiss me more and more until Jacob finally cracked and said, "Bella! I want you back!" Then, he would jump onto the bed, and begin kissing my hands. Edward would grab Jacob's long, black hair, and yank it as hard as possible. Then he would begin bitch-slapping Jacob until he begged for mercy.
What if…Jacob walked into the room, and began making out with...Edward. Oh, I would pay to see that!
I allowed my mind to wander through all of the possibilities.
A loud crash snapped me out of my daydreams. I noticed Edward wasn't in his chair anymore, and when I turned my head, I found him. He was gripping Jacob's neck, and he had apparently slammed Jacob against the wall, because, now Jacob was pressed against the crisp, white partition. I also noticed that Jacob's legs weren't touching the floor, and he was gasping for air. As much as I despised him, I couldn't stand to see another human being in this situation, even if it was Jacob.
"Edward! Let him down! Please, stop hurting him!" I saw Edward's tense shoulders relax a little, but he was still holding Jacob firmly against the wall. "Edward. I said, 'Let. Him. Down.'" Edward released his grip on my ex, and huffed as he walked back to my bedside. Jacob took in a deep, uncomfortable breath, and went back to his position at the door.
"What the hell is your fucking problem, man?" Jacob grunted. Edward glared at him, his bright green eyes seeming to penetrate Jacob's soul. I could see Jacob flinch a little bit, and I hate to hold in a laugh. Edward turned his gaze back to me, and gave me a small, apologetic smile. I smirked in return. "What the hell is going on here? I was just thrown up against a wall, and all of a sudden everything is back to normal and you guys get all lovey-dovey?" This time both Edward and I glared at him. He snarled at us, only this time, I couldn't hold in my laugh. My chuckles vibrated the bed, and I soon found it hard to breathe. Out of my peripheral vision, I could see Edward attempting to stifle a chortle.
"I'm sooo sorry if I hurt you, 'man,' but you shouldn't act like that around Bella," Edward explained sarcastically. I looked at him, confused. "What was he doing?" He sighed, "While you were off in your own little fantasy land, Jacob here was doing pelvic thrusts behind your back. It kinda got me pissed." Jacob laughed, "Kinda Dude, you totally grabbed me by the neck and slammed me against a wall. I think you were a little more than 'kinda pissed.'" This time, I growled, "Just shut the fuck up, Jacob. No one was asking for your commentary. Why are you even here in the first place?" He shrugged, "I dunno. I was bored, and Billy told me he was coming here, so I figured I'd stop by and say hi…Hi…"
I rolled my eyes at him. "What's the real reason you're here, Jacob?" He sneered, and mocked me, mouthing the words I just said, in a ruder way. I rolled my eyes, then quirked my eyebrow, expectantly.
He huffed, but surrendered. "I'm not allowed to see my ex every once in a while?" I shook my head and snapped, "Not if you treated your ex like a piece of shit while the two of you were going out. Which you did." He looked at me, a bit astonished. I grinned.
"Well, fine! If you really hate me that mu-" he was cut off my Billy, who was entering with Charlie. The two of them were followed by Alice, Rose, Jazz, and Em. All of my friends were glaring at Jacob. I beamed. Billy sighed, "Well, Bella. I'm sorry, but Jake and I gotta go. I hope you feel better soon." I smiled at him, "Thanks Billy, I understand. I'll see you around later mkay?" He nodded and rolled out of the room. Jacob turned around to follow him, but not before sending me a smug grin over his shoulder. I could see Edward fuming next to me. God, I hate Jacob Black.
Carlisle came in and checked on me the second day after I woke up.
"Bella! It's good to see you're alive and well. How are you feeling?" I snorted, "Well…what can I say? I don't want to insult the hospital, or anything, but it smells like…too clean…I am wearing paper, and lying in a bed of paper, I haven't sat up for about 23 hours straight, the only thing on TV is "Why is the economy failing us?" and I haven't taken a shower in three and a half days. Oh yeah, and I really have to pee…so, pretty good I guess." He chuckled his warm, inviting chuckle, "I didn't even know 'too clean' was a scent. I'll be sure to look in to that. As for your bladder issue…well, I'm pretty sure it's your own fault. Why don't you go t the bathroom?" I pouted, but got up and carefully made my way over to the lavatory. I really needed to piss.
When I walked out, everyone was debating over whether or not they should have Chinese food for lunch. "I VOTE YES!!!" Emmett yelled. Carlisle reprimanded him with his eyes. "I AGREE WITH EMMETT!!! WAIT, WHere's Charlie…?" Alice huffed, " He left. He had to go to work. Now, I'm going to ask this once again. ARE WE GETTING CHINESE FOOD?!" Everyone but Rosalie nodded.
"Ugh. Fine," she agreed after we all glared at her. Alice ran out of the room, and went to go buy some Chinese food. We all patiently waited. When I mean all, that isn't including Emmett. He kept grumbling about 'faster service' and 'where is fucking Alice with our food?'
When she finally arrived, everyone attacked her, grabbing as much food as possible. I grabbed some chow mien, some orange chicken, some weird mushroom chicken thingy that turned out to be really tasty, and some spicy shrimp thing that I had to give to Edward, because as much as I may love shrimp, I am a complete wimp when it comes to anything spicy.
We finished eating, and I was suddenly very tired. I think someone drugged me. Really, one second I was wide awake, and the next thing I know, I'm drooling on my pillow.
~*~
Today, I was leaving this God forsaken hell hol- I mean, hospital, and I'm hoping I never have to come back. That's very unlikely.
"Bella, are you sure you're okay?" Edward, Edward, Edward. He just doesn't understand. "GOD DAMMIT! EDWARD, I'M GOING TO BE FINE!!!" He put his hands up defensively, "Sorry, sorry!" I heard Emmett whisper "PMS," into Jasper's ear. I turned around and glared at him. His sort of whimpered before running away as fast as his legs could move him. Rose glared at me, "Thanks a lot! Now I have to go catch him," and with that, she ran after her frightened boyfriend.
Alice giggled as the four of us exited. I didn't fail to notice that Jasper was making googley eyes at Alice. Oh God…
We all got into Edward's car. I'm assuming this is the car we took when we came here. I assumed right. There was still a bit of blood in the back seat. I grimaced and looked to Edward.
"Sorry."
He looked at me, confused. "Um…sorry about what?"
"The blood," I told him. He rolled his eyes at me.
"Bella, why the fuck would you be sorry about the blood? It's Newton's fault, not yours. Stop putting all of this blame on yourself…"
I shook my head, "No, it is my fault. I could have fought back. I could have done something to stop him. I shouldn't have let him knock me out. Now your car is ruined, and I missed a whole week of school!"
He glowered at me. "Bella. Don't ever say that again. Got it? It's. Not. Your. Fault. Stop! You could've died, and you're worried about my car?!?!"
I shook my head again. I still couldn't get the guilt out of my head. Edward was fuming now, and we drove home in silence. I could tell both of us were angry at me. Sigh.
First, we stopped at Jasper's house, and dropped him off. He had to get ready for his Civil War reenactment. Then we drove to 'The Swan Place.' Emmett and Rose had taken a separate car, so, Edward didn't have to drive back to the hospital. He just went home. I was assuming that he wasn't going to show up that night.
I decided to go chat with Alice. She always loved it when I came to talk to her. I was like her own little confessional. I walked into her room, and found her lying on the bed, reading a magazine. Of course. "Hey, Al," I said. She looked up from her magazine. "HEY BELLA!" her voice was way too peppy.
"So…What's up? What magazine are you reading"
She lifted up the cover, and I saw it was Bazaar. I nodded.
"Okay, Bella. Let's get down to business!"
Alright. Hope you enjoyed it. I'm gonna post soon, I promise. The only problem is that I'm going to be In San Diego for the whole weekend, and I can't bring a computer with me, so please have patience.
Mwah ha ha ha ha ha ha. ??????
Thea the Playa! You are my other half!!!
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