I knelt on the unforgiving concrete, my knees already feeling painful, even through the thick denim material of my jeans. I tried to arrange my kit without moving too much, avoiding the obscene, and dark until nearly black puddles of congealing blood on the pavement by her car. I chanced a glance at Grissom as he sat on the cold floor by the wheel of his car, head in his hands.

'Griss?' I whispered softly, reaching for his dark blue windbreaker-clad arm and leaving it loosely on the slippery material of his sleeve.

'Hey.' His voice was cracked and strained, broken by the tears that had recently stained the knees of his black work trousers.

'Are you okay?' I asked gently, tightening my grip momentarily on his sleeve for reassurance.

'I just… when this happens to my team, to someone I care about… I don't know why it happens and it hurts me so much…' He swallowed softly and instantly I knew that it wasn't the whole truth.

'You love her don't you?' I gasped; for so long I'd thought of my boss as someone who could never love another human being. I never thought he'd fully comprehend the commitment, yet here he was, face crumpling as I said those words. His calculatingly intelligent mind finally understood love and it was hurting him so much that he could barely stand it. He looked at me, sadness etched in every line on his face.

'Yes…' He admitted softly, his voice breaking as he told me. He dropped his gaze once again to the floor and analysed the lurid splatters of drying blood on the ground.

'Oh Griss…' I whispered, reaching for him in order to reassure him. He fell forwards and I caught him, embracing him tightly. 'Griss I'm so sorry this happened… but you can't work this case, you know that right?' He looked at me as if I was speaking a foreign language.

'I can't work the case?' He repeated hollowly, uncomprehending.

'You can't.' I repeated forcefully, but unwilling to cause him more pain than what I'd already inflicted by finding out his secret.

'What else am I going to do? Paperwork? Greg can't and Sara can't. Catherine and you can't do it alone. I have to do this.'

'We can hand it over to Ecklie…' I knew this was a bad move when his anger flared up again.

'Are you joking? I can't hand over my best friends case to Ecklie! If anyone knew what happened to her they'd never leave her alone. No, we're taking this case. I don't care if I'm emotionally involved or not.' I stared at him, properly stared.

'Okay Grissom. We'll take this case. But I'll supervise okay?' It was a bold move coming from me, but he just smiled and agreed, peering at a splatter on the pavement.

oOo

I sat in the hospital, my now irritated supervisor sitting next to me, shuffling his feet slightly. We were both wondering the same thing: 'How long does an SAEC kit take?' of course we both knew the answer. But Catherine seemed to be dragging it out. Grissom wanted to see her, I could tell. His head jerked up as the door opened and Sara walked out, drowning in the too big hospital gown. I could only watch as he leapt up and walked swiftly to her, wrapping her in his arms as tears streamed down her face.