Chapter Seven
Rashes of the Psychotic Kind
Racine's POV
Reluctantly I open my eyes. I didn't want to leave my wonderful dream. The details are fuzzy but the aftermath is still keeping my pulse rate way above normal. Coming out of my dream world it slowly dawns on me that Ranger has carried me to his bed while I was sleeping. Why couldn't he have woken me up so I could enjoy the moment?
My face felt as if some creepy crawlies were eating me alive. Immediately I felt itchy. From head to toe I felt bugs crawling. Whether my lie induced some sort of psychosis at the moment I don't care. I want out of this darned bed. Scrambling to untangle myself from the sheet I'd managed to get wrapped around me I finally toss the constricting sheet aside.
Staggering out of the bedroom I see Ranger at the kitchen counter preparing a pot of coffee. He looks as if he just crawled out of bed himself. No shirt, no shoes, a pair of black silk boxers the only thing keeping him from being completely indecent. If they slid down another inch I'd get a bird's eye view of what the heck all the fuss is about.
He must have heard my feet scuffling across the carpet because he turned toward me. Both eyebrows rose just before a smile showed me his perfectly straight white teeth. I felt his eyes on me burning wherever they landed. He made the bugs travel as if on a freeway. I began to scratch my face and arms.
"Angel."
"I told you I was allergic to your bed. I told you I'd sleep on the couch. This is your fault," I said as I pointed an accusing finger at him.
Coming to stand before me he looked at his handy work. I was sure I looked hideous. He took my arm so he could examine it more closely. I squinted my eyes at my arm. I couldn't see a single blemish. Well there must be something on my face. I couldn't feel anything. Just because it didn't look like it was there didn't mean it wasn't there. The itchy rash is just lurking beneath the surface of my skin waiting to pop out at the most embarrassing moment.
I can't have a rash popping out today. I have plans for today. Morelli plans. Red Ferrari plans. I'd worry about the pesky license plan some other day. Thinking on it I might go ahead and take the test for my permit. That way I can drive the car I intend to buy if another person is in the car with me. Not Stephanie Plum. Morelli, that's who my copilot will be.
Ranger ran his finger down my cheek then under my chin then on up my other cheek. No rash. If I had one I don't know if I'd feel it or not over the hot flashes racing everywhere inside me. I felt like fanning myself. Maybe the rash has been chased away by a fever.
"No rash," he says with a smile. He's enjoying this far too much.
"Well there was a rash. I'm sure there was a rash. Definitely there was itching. Lots of itching. Have you ever felt as if thousands of bugs were crawling on your skin?" I asked.
"No, not until you just mentioned it. I'm off to the shower. The coffee should be ready in a minute." He hesitated appearing as if he had more to say. From the grimace he gave me I suspect he had to bite his tongue to keep whatever comment he wanted to say from leaving his mouth.
Some diehard Ranger fan in me hoped he might have been on the verge of asking me to join him in the shower. Didn't the news say we should conserve water? I'm a very conscientious person.
I didn't want coffee. I don't drink coffee. What I want is to snoop. Those floors beneath us are calling out to me to be explored. I'm still wearing Ranger's t-shirt minus the belt. Without the belt the shirt is a respectable length. Cramming my feet into my new boots I take my set of keys out of the bowl. I won't be gone long. I'll be back before he finishes his shower. I lost the tieback for my hair. I swept my fingers over my ears tucking as much behind them as possible.
After only a few minutes I find the hub of Ranger's company. There are several men monitoring several banks of screens. I have no doubt they know very well I am here and where I came from. I saw all the cameras. They weren't there to take pictures for the company album. Glancing around I choose the most approachable one. I remember him from last night. His name is Hal.
After a few minutes I don't think Hal knew his own name much less mine. I pushed aside any guilt over manipulating the poor man. I got what I wanted. That's the main thing. I now have been invited on my second date. I'm pretty sure he's regretting asking me but I'm not letting him off the hook. I ignore the comments from the others as I leave.
They tossed out comments questioning Hal's mental health. A few others suggested he wanted an early retirement, one of a permanent nature. A date with me can't be all that bad can it? Considering how my last one ended they may have a point. Now I felt really bad.
Chewing on my lip I reconsidered going with Hal tonight. I'm sure any excuse will be fine with him. He'll just be glad to be off the hook. And me, I still have Morelli on my dance card. I'll make an effort to see him today.
I am learning fast how easy it is to cross the line from what is right and what is wrong. There are gray areas in-between that blur the line at times. My world is no longer black and white. It is now more imperative than ever I keep the knowledge The Company seeks locked away from them as well as mankind. There are enough weapons of mass destruction as it is. Add germ warfare into the mix and the human race is on the verge of extinction.
I don't want the end of the world to be my fault. I want to be a normal woman with a normal life, whatever that is. I am still figuring it all out. I don't like to think what will happen if Stryker isn't successful in keeping The Company from finding me. I don't want to leave this place just yet. Not now I've met Ranger, the others as well, but mainly Ranger.
Opening the door I quietly shut it behind me. I nearly jump out of my skin when Ranger's voice close to me says, "Out for a stroll?"
Clutching my hands to my chest I nearly loose what little equilibrium remains as my eyes take in Ranger in a black suit. The perfect fit screams tailored all the way. Losing any sense I have left to me after getting a look at Ranger decked out like some…some…well I don't know like what, I see a hand reaching out to grip his tie. It must be mine as I am the only other person here.
To cover up this insanity I try to sound angry as I say, "For crying out loud, would it kill you to make some noise, maybe jiggle the change in your pocket?"
"No can do. I don't have any change," he quips as his hands come to rest over mine still clinging to his tie as if it is the only thing anchoring me down. Maybe it is. I do feel lightheaded. A helium balloon that's how I feel.
My second mistake happened when I looked down below his waist. Big mistake. Were pants meant to hug every muscle so that it drew the eye of every lustful female? I am sure men like Charlie found Ranger irresistible too. I see a clear delineation of what I am certain is an erection. Oh boy!
"Where…" I have to stop speaking to clear my throat and swallow. His sexiness has taken every last drop of moisture from my mouth.
"Angel," he says quietly with a finger under my chin. Slowly he drops his head down so his lips can cover mine. That's it just a light touch, no pressure no tongue and yet I think I am about to incinerate.
Just when I'm regaining command of my senses so I can respond he lifts his head. When he speaks his voice is low and rough. It vibrates through me like some pagan drumbeat.
"I have work to do today. I took this gig a long time ago. This guy hired me as his bodyguard for a couple of days. He only wants me. If I could I'd hand him off to someone else."
I am still tongue tied from that kiss. Maybe silence is the way to go with Ranger because he bends his head down for another kiss. This one is not gentle or sweet. It is curl my toes, set my hair on fire inferno blast desire. I sure as heck know it is on my part. One second I'm being kissed to within an inch of my life, the next I'm feeling alone and abandoned as he steps away from me.
"Go get ready. I'll drop you off at the bail bonds office. I had my housekeeper go out and buy you a pair of jeans. You're a little longer in the legs than Stephanie. Good thing too, seeing as how you're allergic all of a sudden," he said as he tugged at his cuff.
Some day I'd meet this phantom housekeeper he keeps telling me about. There had to be one as someone left a tray of food on the counter that wasn't there when I left. Fresh flowers were in the vase sitting on the table beside me. Stephanie and Lula think Ranger is some hero called Batman. If they think he's Batman who do they think his housekeeper is? The Invisible Woman?
After having Ranger kiss me like he just did I don't think I can be civil toward Stephanie. My hands are curling with the urge to scratch her eyes out. I shouldn't feel like this but I do. I've only known Ranger for a day and a half. What I know about him and what he knows about me should put a wedge a mile wide between us.
Despite every rational objection I can think of I can't help responding to Ranger with one of humanities most basic instincts, copulation. This is crazy. I am too new to the attraction between men and woman to know if that's all this is. If another attractive man comes along will I fall under his spell? Stephanie is attracted to two men. I also believe she loves both men.
If one man gets me this discombobulated what will two men do? Seeing as how this is my first foray into the arena of anything remotely sexual maybe I should stick to one man. Maybe that man should be someone less…well less of everything that makes Ranger, Ranger.
Experimentation is the best way to learn anything. Test, test, test, then test some more. I definitely need someone not so sexually predatory. Everyone knows you have to learn to walk before you can run. I'm still wobbly on my feet. I better stay out of the fast lane.
After showering I let my mind drift. Taking everything that's happened then adding in some variables my conclusion is it might be best if I left Ranger's apartment altogether. I have the means to live anywhere I want.
If I tell Ranger I am sick that will give me the opportunity to find a way out of here. I did see a bank of windows on the fifth floor facing the back of the building. I should be able to find a way to climb down. This type of architecture has places where I can get a foot or hand hold. Piece of cake. I'd go out the front gate but all those tattletales in the war room will tell on me if I try to leave that way without Ranger.
Practicing in the mirror looking ill I only succeed in appearing deranged. If I wouldn't die from embarrassment I'd fake my monthly cycle. Tapping the sides of my temples with my fists I try to beat an idea into me. Then it hit me. The belly ring. Truthfully it still hurts. Not a lot but maybe I can gain some sympathy if I rub around the area until it is red. By the time I am done it is now throbbing. I'd snagged one of my fingers on the darn thing. That thing has to go. Not for a while as I'll hate for Ranger to have the last laugh.
"Ranger, I hurt. Maybe the piercing is infected. I think maybe I should stay home." It's hard to sound ill without going overboard without knowing how much is too much, illness and I being strangers like we are.
Ranger inspects the area of my stomach a little too closely for my peace of mind. Apparently the world hasn't corrupted me so much that my innocent appearance has been replaced by jaded cynicism, not yet anyway. Give me a minute then look again.
"I don't think it's infected. Did you get anything caught in the ring maybe while you were asleep?" he asks after resuming an upright position.
"No." Not while sleeping anyway. He didn't need to know all the finer details.
"If you're sure. I'll have Ella look in on you."
"Ella?" I ask wondering if he had some other woman tucked away in the building I didn't know about.
"My housekeeper," Ranger replied giving me a strange questioning look.
By now he is likely doubting my intelligence. He did mention his housekeeper. Guess she isn't The Invisible Woman. Her name is Ella. I suppose Ella could be The Invisible Woman's name. Why not? If Ranger can be Batman's name why can't Ella be The Invisible Woman's name?
As soon as Ranger left I felt lonely, abandoned. Being alone for the first time is a scary thing. People leave the safety of their parent's all the time. I'm twenty-four darn it not four. I'm above average intellectually. Surely I can manage to live on my own. After all this isn't the middle of the jungle. This is Trenton, New Jersey for goodness sake.
I gave a quick call to Amy to let her know not to deliver anything until I found a new place to live. She offered to take me around looking at apartments. She'd even pick me up. I'd give her a call once I felt I had put enough distance between me and RangeMan headquaters.
Since Ranger could get phone records without breaking a sweat I'd use a payphone somewhere across town. It might take him a while to figure out Amy is the one aiding and abetting. Maybe I should keep my living space a secret for a while. Amy would be like a baby rabbit facing a lion when Ranger got her under his frightening glare. What I would do is let her drive me to get my permit then buy a car.
If I can't trust myself not to cave when it comes to Ranger, it's a sure bet Amy wouldn't think twice about bringing out the white flag. If I need a friend I can always contact her later when Ranger has grilled her then left her scorched body behind.
The window I chose to climb out is located in the bathroom. No cameras in there. Disabling the alarm on the window wasn't easy but I did manage that with only a little frustration.
It's been a while since I did any climbing so I'm rusty. My arms begin to quiver about halfway down. I need to start lifting weights. I'm getting soft. Find a finger hold then move my foot. Find a foot hold move my hand. That part's still working. Reaching a place where I'm only about four feet off the ground I jump down letting my knees bend to cushion the impact.
My phone call to Amy takes only a few seconds. She's up for some fun. Car shopping is one of her favorite things according to her. She knows just where to take me.
Amy beeps her horn when she sees me coming up the street. I am barely in my seat before she takes off like a rocket. Amy's car is a five speed. It goes fast, faster and supersonic. There are times I think I feel my cheeks flapping from the wind coming in the open window. It's scary as hell. I like it.
Amy told me all about the pitfalls of trying to buy a car without a license. What with insurance and those pesky things called driver's licenses, the government made driving a hassle. Her own car she bought from a friend of a friend who knows a friend who has some cars. Both new and old. He could get whatever model or color you wanted. Sometimes it might take a few days, a week at the most. We went to see the friend at the bottom of the friend list. I bought my first car and didn't even have to bother with getting a permit or license.
Chewy, the friend, agreed to give me a driving lesson for free since I bought a $50,000 black Ferrari. His soon to be ex-wife was trying to get the car in the divorce settlement. He'd planned to set fire to until a buyer came along with an offer he couldn't refuse. The other buyer was a day late so….Ranger would understand. He was cool about these things.
I almost backed out of the deal when I heard I was buying a car meant for Ranger. Ranger couldn't find me just because I bought a car meant for him. He may be intuitive but not psychic. Chewy wouldn't have any idea where to find me after our business was concluded.
After several hair-raising hours I can now drive without grinding gears or stalling the car. I can even manage to stay on my side of the road most of the time. Practice makes perfect Amy told me. She's still learning after two years of driving. I suppose that explains our erratic ride over here.
Chewy and Amy advised me that since I am not strictly legal, shoot I am miles from legal, I should try to stay away from known speed traps. They told me the streets to avoid. Amy said if I saw lights flashing behind me, smash my foot to the floor then…well I won't say what she said. The gist of her statement was I should try not to get caught. It works for her.
It takes a lot of cramming to get all my new things into my tiny new car. Maybe I should have gone for something a little roomier. Well, if this car doesn't work out I know where Chewy can be found. I just hope the next time we meet he has given up the nasty habit of chewing tobacco. Even better, swallowing instead of spitting would be nice.
Stopping at the nearest convenience store I ask to borrow a phonebook. I don't know where Morelli lives. I am curious what sort of man he is. I know he's a policeman. I know he is considered handsome. What I don't know is what he is lacking that has Stephanie unable to choose him over Ranger.
Ripping out the page with his phone number and address I leave the store. I wonder if ripping the pages out of a phonebook is against the law. If it is it doesn't seem like one they'd pursue with any real gusto.
Joseph Morelli's house is an unassuming house amidst blocks and blocks of houses that are similar yet each with slight differences that make them home to the people inside.
I reach the sidewalk feeling nervous now that I'm about to ring the doorbell. Barking from the inside reaches me just as a loud banging on the other side of the door nearly shoves the door off its hinges. A dog! The only dogs I am familiar with are vicious animals with three objectives, kill, maim, destroy. I had to learn how to be firm with them or they would have kept me inside the house in a show of power. I showed them, I was the more powerful animal.
The door opened to reveal a tall man with dark hair. His eyes were a warm brown. The dog he had restrained looked more like a small horse with lots of long red hair.
"Well, hello there Sunshine." He stretched out the hello. His voice sounded friendly. He may even be flirting. There is a glint in his eye very similar to one I've seen a couple times in Ranger's eyes.
When the dog lunged out of his grasp about to jump on me I pointed my finger at him commanding in a no nonsense manner, "Sit." The dog sat. His tail stopped wagging, tongue stopped hanging out dripping dog drool, eyes focused straight ahead just the way a well trained dog should respond.
"How the hell did you do that? I've tried everything to get him to mind. So far all I've got for my troubles is dog drool dripping off my chin. Did Stephanie take pity on me and send another dog trainer? If she did I'll hire you on a permanent basis," he says as he scratches behind the dogs ears.
As the dog continues to sit he says, "Hey, I think you've broken Bob. He looks comatose."
"Heel," I command. The dog he called Bob stands up beside Morelli. I guess he is Stephanie's Morelli. This is the address.
"He isn't broken, he's just well trained. He needs firm directives for him to understand what you want. One word commands work best. Are you Joe Morelli? I am a friend of Stephanie's, Racine Crawford," I say not completely lying even if it isn't strictly the truth. If asked I think both Miss Plum and I would agree we will never be bosom buddies. Cordial but cool.
Instead of inviting me in he closes the door behind him then asks me to sit on his front stoop beside him. Is this a custom in American cities? I did see lots of people sitting out in front of their houses and apartments during my ride with Ranger then again today.
He gives me a quick onceover, furrowing his brow trying to place me. Finally he is willing to admit he is stumped so he says, "You didn't go to our high school. I would have remembered you. Your too young to have even been in high school when we were."
"I'm a recent acquaintance. I met her through Ranger. I lived with him until recently," I explain.
"No shit. And you and Stephanie are friends? Somehow I can't see her being even remotely polite to someone living with Ranger. I know I sure have to try very hard not to rip his heart out whenever he and I run into each other. I do try to be civil for Steph's sake. I thought she might be staying with him again. At the moment we are on one of our off times of our on again off again relationship," he concludes.
"I thought Ranger said you were engaged." I am confused by this off and on again dynamic that he says is their relationship.
Scratching at his ear he says sheepishly, "Yeah well, we did try that for a while. It didn't fit. We've even tried living together. That works for awhile. Until she conquers the world I don't think anyone is going to tie Stephanie Plum down. I'm patiently waiting for her to find herself. My hope is that it's me she comes home to for good."
Looking behind me I am sure he sees my car. He smiles when he notices the back crammed with so much for such a little car. Some things are hanging out the window. At least it is nothing too personal or too shocking.
"Yours?" he asks.
"Yes. I just bought it this morning. Chewy, the man who sold it to me also taught me to drive. Amy took me to him as the dealership has to abide by so many rules I couldn't buy a car from any of those places." I am smiling with pride of ownership. This is very first piece of property worth any real value. Stocks and bonds don't count. I can't see them or ride in them at over 100 miles per hour while sitting in the driver's seat.
Several more minutes of chatting and I am completely won over by him. He is so charming. He knows it too. He isn't above using it to his advantage either. I also see that he is a man who thinks women should stay at home to keep the home fires burning. It is an antiquated idea in this day and age. A plan is working its way to completion as we talk.
"Mr. Morelli I'd love to continue this conversation over dinner. I need to find a place to stay first. I can call you after I unload my car. I already have your number. I tore the page out of the phone book. Oh goodness, are you going to arrest me for destruction of property or something?" I worriedly ask.
"Naw, Sunshine, I'm a homicide detective not the phone book police," he says with a grin.
"You're teasing me. Stryker thinks I'm too naïve to be let out on my own. That's why he sent me to Ranger. Ranger is supposed to be protecting me. I've decided I don't want to be protected," I say defiantly daring him to say he agrees with my brother.
"I don't know your brother, I do know Ranger. He takes his responsibilities seriously. If I had a sister who looked like you I'd send her to someone other than Ranger. That's like putting the Easter Bunny in a cage with the big bad wolf," he informs me in a serious tone despite the lopsided smile still turned my way.
"So will you go to dinner with me? I'll pick you up and you can drive my car," I tempt him shamelessly.
"Registered?" he asks.
"What?" I stupidly ask trying to think of something to deter this line of questions.
"I'm guessing no. I know Chewy. Chewy is not what we in law enforcement call totally legitimate," he says as he wraps a comforting arm around me.
"No, the car's legitimate. I'm the one not legitimate. I sort of bypassed getting a permit or driver's license. Are you going to take my car? Am I going to jail? I would very much like to stay out of jail," I say pitifully. If I go to jail that would ruin my whole day.
"I suppose I could let you off the hook this time but the car will have to stay put until you get a license. I'll drive us to dinner. When we get back we can decide what to do after that," he offers me this generously.
"Well…you see…I um…I don't want to leave my car out in the open where anyone might see it." The anyone who might see it is Ranger.
As if reading my mind he asks, "Someone like Ranger?"
The guilt must be written on my face. He relents when I remain silent looking down at my boots for he says kindly, "Come on. I'm starving. I may even have a place for you to stay. A cousin of mine married one of the officers from the precinct. He's taken a six month leave of absence. My cousin is stationed overseas. She's four months pregnant so naturally he wants to be with her. Here's the lucky part, they just bought a condo now they need a house sitter. If I give him a call I'm sure the job is yours. How does that sound?" he asks.
"I say thank you very much. I will accept assuming your friend agrees. Mr. Morelli you are one of the kindest men I have ever met." No need to tell him I've only met a handful.
"Hey, call me Joe. When you call me Mr. Morelli I feel old."
The Italian restaurant he takes me too is very crowded. It has a grand opening banner in front. The owner is standing just inside the door greeting the customer's as they come in. When Joe and I walk in Joe is grabbed around the waist and lifted clean off his feet as the man says, "Joe, my good friend, what you think? Think it going to make me rich man? Come, let me find you and your lovely lady one of our best tables. Nothing is too good for Joe Morelli. Come, come. Sit. Eat. Drink. Enjoy the music," he says to us while wending his way through several tables.
"Now. What do you want to drink? Wine, champagne, a beer perhaps? We have some very nice imported beers. For you, everything on the house, no charge. Uncle Vito take good care of you Joseph. You no worry." A slight nod of his head brings a waiter to our table.
Since I want to try everything but don't want to seem like a glutton I ask Joe to order for me. The waiter pours out the wine, Joe takes a sip then nods his head at the waiter. Joe's glass is filled then mine.
"Salute," Joe says lifting his glass so he can take a long sip.
The aroma is not unpleasant to I take a sip. It is better than the beer Ranger gave me. I take another sip, bigger this time. Warmth coats my inside as the alcohol reaches my stomach. Deciding I like the taste I tilt my glass draining it in a few swallows.
"It's just occurred to me that I should ask how old you are. I feel I may be contributing to the delinquency of a minor," Joe says with a look that says please tell me I'm wrong.
The waiter came by filling my glass once again. This time there's no sipping, I gulp down the wine the same as I do water. Water never made me feel this…what is this I am experiencing? I feel warm from top to bottom now. There is a mellowness overcoming me. The world doesn't seem so glum. A few more long sips make me feel as light as a feather, like I don't have a care in the world.
"You are wrong, wrong, wrong. I am twenty-four. Count them. Twenty-four fingers," my bleary eyes see an awful lot of fingers where there are usually only five on each hand.
"Sunshine, if you had 24 fingers, I'd be sitting several tables over in case you might send out radiation," Joe says with a smile, or is that two smiling sets of lips? Oh my God! He's morphing right in front of my eyes. He has two of everything. Looking at the other diners they appear to be from the same alien race as Joe.
"I think we better get some dinner in you. Might be a good idea to stay away from the wine, at least until after we eat. I have a suspicion you aren't used to drinking," he said removing my glass out of my reach he then offers me a breadstick.
I'm too interested in trying more wine to notice much about the meal. Vito comes by several times asking if we have everything we need. I am tempted to tell him we, I, need more wine. After trying to get me to talk without success Joe relents putting my half-filled glass back within my reach.
"Sip, don't gulp." I drain the glass holding it out to be filled again.
"Sunshine, if I don't cut you off Vito might suspect I am trying to get you drunk so I can have my wicked way with you," Joe said with a lopsided grin.
"Would you?" I lean forward putting my elbows on the table. I knock my water glass over. A waiter comes rushing over mopping up the water with a towel.
After he leaves I repeat my question, "Would you?"
"Would I what?" he says distractedly wiping up some water the waiter missed.
"Would you have your wicked way with me? No one's ever had their way with me wicked or otherwise. I thought maybe Ranger but I think maybe he's out of my league." I scoot my chair around so I am sitting very close to him. The movement causes my head to spin just a little. A hiccup makes its way out of my mouth.
I reach for Joe's glass of wine. My hand is quicker than his even if I do see two glasses sitting there. "Hey, Sunshine, I'm serious. If you're not used to drinking, that glass might put you over your limit. Maybe you've already reached your limit."
Waving away such nonsense with my hand I chugged down the remainder of wine from Joe's glass. Putting the wine glass down, actually I may have slammed it down as the stem broke off leaving me holding the broken top portion.
Another waiter races over to replace the wine glass I broke. He tips the bottle of wine to fill the glass before Joe can finish his protest. We wrestle over the glass. Sneaky Joe leans into me so his breath is blowing along my neck causing goose bumps. Tingles flow along the path of his breath. Wow! If he can do that with only breathing on me what would happen if he kissed me?
"I think it's time we got you settled in for the night." He says softly in my ear. I don't even know the glass is being taken away from me until he leans back giving me a smile then a toast just before he drains the glass.
I don't know how I got out to his car. Maybe I floated. I felt like howling at the moon. I stuck my head out the window enjoying the breeze whipping against my face. The lights of other cars and stores sort of made me dizzy as they flashed by. Even that felt good. I don't know what a carnival ride feels like but I imagine it feels something like this.
"Go faster. Go faster," I urge him.
"You do remember I'm a cop don't you? It is frowned on when a cop gets a speeding ticket." He doesn't sound irritated with me. A slight increase in speed brings out a laugh I can't hold back.
Turning to the side I hang half my body out of the window. The howl that came out wasn't planned even though I thought about howling earlier. I wanted more wine. Wine is great stuff.
Pulling my body back inside the car I say, "Let's go get some more wine. Ranger gave me beer. It was nasty. I like wine. It has a mellowing affect. Don't I seem mellow to you?"
"Sunshine, if you were any mellower you'd be unconscious. When you wake up in the morning you might not like me so much. Pity, I think I like you a lot," Joe said to me while keeping his eyes on the road ahead.
I patted his knee in reassurance, "I'll still like you in the morning. I might even love you. Would it be alright if I loved you Joe? Stephanie won't mind. She's got Ranger, Rangeman, Batman. He's a super hero you know. You know Joe, I think maybe you were right about that last glass of wine. I feel funny."
"Do you feel sick like you're going to throw up?" He anxiously looked over at me.
"I don't know. I've never thrown up before. Jane said it's awful." Now my floating sensation started to feel more like a sinking rock in my stomach.
I have no idea where we are. Joe has pulled into an underground parking garage, much like Ranger's. Coming around to my side of the car he helps me out.
"I'll help you upstairs then get you into bed. I'll sleep on the couch. In the morning I'll take a cab back to my house to get your car. I can pick mine up when I get back." He half carries me to an elevator. If you've ever had a bit too much wine don't get into an elevator. It does horrible things to your stomach.
My world only stops spinning when I feel a mattress beneath me. Joe stands over me looking as if he's trying to decide what to do.
"Sunshine if I thought you could take your own clothes off I wouldn't even think about what I'm about to do. Well, that's a lie. A guy thinks about stuff like every seven minutes or so. With someone like you I think we cut the time in half," using a quiet voice which I am fast coming to appreciate.
Throwing my arms up I say pitifully, "I don't care. Just take them off. I feel awful. If you're my friend why didn't you warn me about the wine?"
A chuckle is followed by, "I did sweetheart, but you thought you knew better. I think I better phone Ranger and let him know you're alright. I'd hate to throw him in jail because he tore half the city apart searching for you. Well honestly, I wouldn't like him to tear the city apart but I wouldn't mind throwing his ass in jail."
Giggling, I never giggle, I say, "You said ass. Stryker gave Ranger strict instructions not to cuss around me. Gee, I said ass. What other words can you teach me?"
Joe abandoned the idea of taking my clothes off. I tried to help but I think I only succeeded in making it more difficult to remove anything.
Whatever Joe can teach me will have to wait for another day because my world went dark and I knew no more until I woke with a pounding hammer inside my head.
