I haven't been uploading recently; and that is due to numerous reasons, most personal and private. I was very sick for a while and found no inspiration; I've hardly watched much Tsubasa Chronicles since so I wasn't enthusiastic or full of ideas waiting to burst when I sat down at my computer to write. If anything, I've just been avoiding writing. I uploaded a fan fiction and it didn't get much reviews or anything, so I received a slight blow due to the fact that I was anxious that once I had written "Avant Ce Soir" that no one would read my works. A lot of relationship issues have taken place and writing about romance made my heart ache. So I'm so very sorry for the slow update, I will be writing a lot quicker these days. Thanks for reading.
Song recommendation: Leave Out All the Rest – Linkin Park
Fai's POV
It felt like weeks while we were searching. A sleepless and restless occasion, upon which all of us remained heavily silent. Syaoran was becoming more and more distressed by each passing minute; his pace was quickened so it was almost impossible to keep up with him. I understood how he felt; my heart began to pump faster and I subconsciously squeezed Kurogane's hand. He cast me a nervous glance, giving me a faint half smile that didn't touch his eyes. The rain started to pound down and it was getting to the point when the rain was soaking through my clothes and chilling my skin to the point when it actually hurt. The coldness was hard and bitter, like it was sharp fingers pinching me. It became clear that Syaoran wasn't thinking straight.
"Hey, kid, calm down will you?" Kurogane barked, having said this several times already but none of them loud enough for Syaoran to hear since he was so busy racing around.
Syaoran flinched at the sound of Kurogane's voice, his brown eyes slowly meeting ours. He was panting deeply, his clothes pressed against his skin, looking over ten shades darker, his hair plastered against his forehead. He was shivering from the cold. It was almost as if he was only now becoming aware of things as he hugged his arms to himself to shield himself from the chilling winds.
"Look, you're getting yourself nowhere acting like this," Kurogane continued after he was sure that he had Syaoran's full attention. "Fai and I can't keep chasing after you while you tear up the entire town looking for the Princess and the rice ball. Why don't you get yourself back to the hotel? You and Fai." His eyes moved to me, emphasising the word 'and' to make sure I understood too. I narrowed my eyes defiantly. He looked away back to Syaoran. "I'll have one more look around and I'll let you know if I find anything," he added swiftly.
Syaoran's gaze only hardened, his hands dropping to his side as if to show us he didn't care that he was cold. His lips were pressed into a thin line, not saying a word. Kurogane didn't look away, and his jaw began to clench. It didn't take much to get Kurogane angry but the last thing we needed was a fight.
"You know we can't do that, Kuro-puu," I said softly, surprising both Syaoran and Kurogane. "I'm not leaving you out in this, and I'm certain Syaoran doesn't want to take the backseat while you look for his Princess. I mean," I smiled wryly at him. "You'd do the same for me, right?"
Kurogane's cheeks turned the lightest shade of pink and he smirked slightly. I knew by that smirk that he agreed. Syaoran understood also and turned his back on us as he began to walk forward.
"You're such a softy," I giggled, as we slowly began to follow, tilting my head upwards to look at him.
"Shut it, wizard," Kurogane growled, although it wasn't in a menacing manner. He buried his hands deep into his pockets, shaking his black hair free of the heavy raindrops that clung to him.
It felt like it was happening in an instant. I was walking next to Kurogane then the next moment, something stole my breath. My breath fell from my lips, but the inhale was stopped short, choking me. My eyes widened and I froze in my tracks. I could distantly hear Kurogane speaking to me, but his voice was muffled, almost like the sound was slowly fading into silence. His voice was almost like a groan in my ears and my heart seemed to jolt in my chest. My knees felt weak, as if my limbs had been disconnected from the joints, like my bones had dissolved causing me to sink to my knees. I faintly felt something warm and heavy on my shoulder, shaking me as if to detach me from this nightmare that felt so real. Before my eyes, I saw that face. The face of Ashura. The way his dark eyes narrowed, the way they roamed over me in the most sickening, physical manner. Instant pain flooded through my body and it felt as if hot slick blood was pouring from a wound in my arm. The way the blade in my hand plunged into Ashura, watching his eyes turn glassy like a doll's eyes, unseeing but I still felt as though they were looking directly at me. His voice echoed within my body, bouncing off of bones and muscle, rattling joints and piercing organs. A voice breathed in my ear: "Your death is left to me after he's finished with you…"
An invisible force around my throat preventing me from inhaling suddenly disappeared. I felt weak and dizzy as I slumped, holding myself with shaking arms, gulping for air like a parched man would to water. It refreshed my body and the pain was nothing but a dull memory that seemed to leave faint traces along my limbs and torso. The only place that didn't dull was my abdomen and I slowly touched it with my fingertips, squinting through the mist that seemed to cloud my vision, making everything blurry and shift in and out of place.
"...hey! Fai?"
I closed my eyes and when I opened them again; my vision had cleared, like a mist turning into a clear day. I turned my head slightly to glimpse at Kurogane, whom looked perplexed. I licked my suddenly dry lips and offered him my trembling hand. He took it, his hand as steady and strong as he kept me standing. I looked him in his eyes.
"You okay?" Kurogane asked after a moment's pause.
I nodded, although this was a lie. Kurogane looked like he was some sort of lie detector machine as his brow creased into a tiny frown when his eyes snapped up from my face past me. His eyes looked slightly alarmed. I wanted to turn round to look for myself but didn't dare too just in case I fell down again.
"What is it?" I said, growing more concerned by the second as he didn't answer me. "Kurogane?" his features looked dark and taunt, but they softened once I said his name. He returned my gaze. I raised my eyebrows a little, silently requesting that he told me what was wrong.
"The kid's gone," Kurogane informed me slowly, his tone suggesting that he was completely perplexed by this and that he wasn't sure if he believed what he was saying. I managed to look around to find he was telling the truth. There was no sign of Syaoran anywhere.
"He must've carried on without us," Kurogane muttered, partly to reassure himself rather than me. He seemed slightly shaken by the fact I'd just collapsed, the princess and Mokona were gone and now, Syaoran had vanished.
I swallowed hard as we moved forward, both of us turning our heads in every possible direction, eyes scanning the area for any sign of Syaoran. I saw no sign and I grew anxious. What had happened earlier? What was with that? I had tried for so long to force the memory of Ashura into the very corners of my minds, keeping them boarded up and blocking them out of my mind whenever I was sleeping or lying awake in the middle of the night. Sometimes, they'd seep into my consciousness and all those aches would rise against my skin where he'd touched me, where he'd hit me and where he'd forced himself. I would feel a burning sensation on my stomach, faint though. Not as strong and painful as the pains I'd just witnessed. It was almost as if my body had been shifted back in time to that moment, my body being inflicted with those wounds all over again. I'd heard a voice…that familiar voice that churned my gut…
"Hey! Kid!!!"
My mind snapped back to reality, Kurogane's raised voice startling me. I looked to where he was looking only to take a sigh with relief. Syaoran was standing at the foot of some pale grey stone steps, hands at his sides, back turned to us. It was almost like he was standing in a museum, staring at a painting that fascinated him. It took me a moment to realise that Syaoran was standing at the stairs leading up to a temple. A religious temple? Then it struck me; as I heard my own voice echoing in my ears: "That'd be the city's temple. The world has over nine temples dotted in populated cities. But the one in this city is the largest."
"The city's temple," I breathed and I felt Kurogane look at me although I didn't return it. I felt uneasy here, the air was thin and seemed to cut through me. I began to shiver, but it wasn't to do with the cold. The rain had began to die down until it was only drizzling, feeling the light gentle drops land on my skin.
"Syaoran?" I called my voice hoarse.
Instead of turning round at the sound of my voice, Syaoran began to sprint up the steps, missing steps at a time, stumbling and knocking his knees. Kurogane reacted swifter than I, bolting right after him. I shortly followed, my limbs feeling heavy. I felt like I was doing something I'd regret this feeling that twisting itself around my body. Everything was screaming for me to stop, for me to turn back round and run away from this place. A lump rose in my throat that felt like my heart, knowing I couldn't leave Kurogane or Syaoran. That Sakura and Mokona might be here…Sakura had expressed interest in this place when I'd told her about it. This temple may be the place where her feather is; maybe she went into a trance and came here, Mokona following her to ensure her safety. That seemed to be the case…up until the moment I reached the top of the stairs, panting softly as the back of my throat began to burn, my heart beating so loudly in my chest, the blood roaring in my ears.
Sakura was there…lying on the floor with Syaoran cradling her in his arms, shaking her, repeating the words: "Wake up, Princess, please wake up". Kurogane was standing a few feet away from me. I slipped my clammy hand into his, squeezing his fingers. Kurogane returned the squeeze shortly, his eyes not shifting from Sakura and Syaoran. He must be thinking the same as me…that Sakura was dead…
"Mokona…" the words fell from my heavy numb lips. "Where is he?"
"I don't know…" Kurogane murmured in reply, looking slightly grim. "He's not here I don't think. We'd have heard him by now…"
"SAKURA!!!" Syaoran's voice pierced me sharper than any blade; it made the old wound in my arm seem like nothing. I tensed up.
"Your death is left to me after he's finished with you…" the voice breathed once more, causing the hair on the back of my neck stand on end, almost like a breath against my skin. "I'll kill you…Fai D. Fluorite. You and your disgusting partner. Even your pathetic friends…watch them breathe their final breaths…knowing it is because they've come in contact with you. You will lose everything…watch everything and everyone you've ever loved die before your eyes…just like how I watched you kill my master." And image of Ashura's dead form flashed before my eyes and I finally understood. I knew…
"Masquerade…" I gasped. A gust of wind blew around me and there she was, standing before me, one hand on my shoulder, the other holding the back of my hair to keep my head tilted back, my throat at her mercy. I had no time to be shocked, her black eyes like an abyss, the abyss I would be floating in if she succeeded. I heard Kurogane shout in surprise but before he could attack, over five Kreatūra were surrounding him. I couldn't see what was happening after that, for Masquerade released my shoulder and ran her sharp long nails trace across my cheek, almost forcing me to look at her. I felt her nail cut my skin and a dribble of blood trickling down my skin. I winced, closing one of my eyes slightly; afraid to completely close them in case she took advantage of that.
Masquerade reminded me of a cat, cooing its prey, toying with it to its delight until it lost interest. I felt like a mouse locked in her claws, feeling the intense pain and wanting it to end. She'd cast me some sign of hope, hope that I would live to see another day, to tell my loved ones that I cared for them deeply, only for her to take that away by pouncing upon me again. That hope seemed so distant, so far. My baby…I became drenched in horror. I'd nearly forgotten I was carrying Kurogane's child…my child. I wanted to touch my stomach but didn't want her to see. I didn't want her to touch my stomach in any way shape or form. Not my baby…tears burned my eyes despite how hard I tried to push them away. I was reassuring myself in my mind that that wouldn't happen. I was replaying this thought in my head over and over, hoping it would somehow become reality. Oh, how I hate hope. So uncertain, so available to the heart but not to reality.
"I wondered when you would find me, Fai," she purred, pulling a little hair on the fistful of my hair that she had. "When you would serve yourself to me…you and your lover." She looked over to him, smirking. "If he doesn't cool off his foul temper, Fai, bad things will happen. Tell your lover to calm down or else."
"Kurogane…" I spluttered, before she could finish her last word. Butterflies rampaged in my gut, rising up to my chest where their beating, rapid wing movement caused my heart to clench. "Please calm down…"
He was being pinned down on the ground by the Kreatūra, shouting at them although his voice faded when I spoke.
"For me…" I added before he could protest. He was silent after that and I saw, out of the corner of my eye, the Kreatūra lifting him up to his feet, their touch burning his skin, making him hiss.
"Stop hurting him," I demanded, my voice turning frantic. "Please…they're hurting him. Let him go!"
Masquerade pulled harder on my hair, bringing me down onto my knees. My scalp stung and my eyes watered. I chewed hard on my bottom lip, glowering up at her. I never wanted to hit a woman before in my life…though I wouldn't consider her a woman, or even a human being. She was a savage monster in human form, fooling herself to believe she knows feeling, pretending that she actually feels grief for her dead master. She couldn't feel grief; she couldn't feel love or even hate. Masquerade was just an emotionless shell, in which sentiment is a meaningless echo, a dimming shadow.
"Any more outbursts, Fai darling," Masquerade said, in a cooing manner although her tone was sharp and sour. "And you'll ruin my fun. I want to enjoy this revenge, not rush it."
"What did you do to Sakura???" Syaoran's tormented voice reached my ears. I'd nearly forgotten he was there. It was apparent that Masquerade did also since she turned her head slightly ajar and showed little interest in the boy.
"Oh, you're here?" she asked, with a dim hint of recognition. "I remember you. And your darling princess. Of course, it didn't take long to recognize her and Yuuko's rodent. She's merely asleep. Try shaking her all you want, my dear boy. She won't wake." She gave a bitter short laugh as the color drained from his face. "Why don't you try giving her a kiss? True love's kiss? Pathetic child…I really have no use for you." She flicked her index finger, her invisible force knocking Syaoran flying back into a wall, rendering him unconscious.
"Syaoran!" a high pitched voice cried, which I recognized as Mokona's.
Mokona was here? I felt my stomach lurch. Mokona's mere presence was meant to turn Masquerade weak…why was she so powerful? So powerful that she could withstand being in the same room as him? It dawned on me the moment I thought that.
"Sakura's feather…" I exclaimed, my eyes widening. "You have Sakura's feather? You're…you're that goddess…"
"So very nice you think so," Masquerade leered, her pitch black eyes now turning on me. "I needed a lot of power. These fools gave it to me. It took a lot of my energy, performing all of those 'natural' disasters but I was rewarded. A feather fell upon me and I felt this energy surge through me. I knew it was what you'd been looking for…and I knew you would someday come to this world looking for it. Time just flew by, didn't it, Fai?"
Masquerade had the feather…she had it all along…we'd have to come face to face with her someday. No matter how many worlds we travelled to, no matter how long it took or how many feathers we'd find along the way. We'd have to meet Masquerade…and when that happened, she'd be more powerful than any of us. More powerful than me, more powerful than Kurogane or Syaoran…more powerful than Yuuko herself…
I hope you enjoyed this chapter! The next won't be so long away. Please check out my other fan fictions and let me know what you think.
What will go down between Fai and Masquerade? Who will be the victor? What will be the outcome and who will lose their life? Find out in the next chapter.
