8. Watching you
Rick was asleep looking like an angel. I took one last look at him. I did not want to leave him. But this was the only way. I kiss the top of his head and took one last look. This might be the last time I saw Rick alive. But I had to do the right thing. I left Rick a note on the bed and prayed he would understand.
Leaving the prison again caused me to have tears in my eyes. Why did I have to leave
Rick, Carl, and Judith behind? They were my family now. But killing Philip was the only
way to ensure my new family would be safe. I needed to take Shane's advice and not be
so emotional about what I needed to do. I would go back to Woodbury and convince
Philip somehow I could be trusted. Then when the moment was right I would kill him.
The idea of killing someone caused my stomach to turn, but I had no choice. I past the
prison gate walking away without looking back. I can do this, I thought.
I had not made it too far when I saw a walker coming up to me. I took my knife, and jammed it through the head killing it quickly. Suddenly I heard a noise. It was the sound of hands clapping. I looked over and saw Philip. How was he always a step ahead?
"Good kill, Andrea," Philip said softly.
"What are you doing here? You aren't supposed to be here?" I asked looking into his light brown eyes.
"I was looking for you. Everyone in Woodbury has been," Philip whispered.
"I decided to come back on my own," I told him moving closer.
"Why? You and Rick were not getting along?"
"I missed you, and I want to come home. Woodbury is my home. You are my home. I know you don't trust me yet, but you can," I lied.
"We'll see about that," Philip said taking my arm. He pulled into the truck, and was shocked I was not fighting him.
"I am going back willingly," I told him again.
"Why? Rick isn't treating you right?" Philip sneered at me.
"There is nothing going on between Rick and I. I only want to be with you," I reassured him.
"Why should I believe that? I have been watching you over there, and I see the way you look at him. You never looked at me that way. I should have known you had something for that asshole. You told me that there was someone else," Philip said his arms wrapped around me tightly.
"Yes there was. I was in love with Shane, but he loved Lori," I said loudly.
"Shane? As in dead Shane?"
"Yes. And honestly I would rather not talk about it. Some things are best left unsaid," I said not wanting to discuss Shane with Philip. I knew Shane deep down wanted to do the right thing, and was not the monster Philip was.
Philip looked into my eyes and saw that there was pain there. I knew he believed me now that Rick and I were only friends. That the other person was Shane. If I could convince of that maybe I could get him to trust me again.
"So you loved Shane? Not Rick?"
"Yes," I said moving closer to him. That wasn't completely a lie. I did love Shane, but now I loved Rick. Philip could not know that though.
"And now you love me? Why should I give you another chance? This is the second time you left Woodbury. How can I trust you?" Philip yelled.
We were already back in Woodbury, and I felt sick my stomach. I wanted to be back with Rick more then anything. I hated Philip, but I did not want to kill him. You can do this. Remember what Shane told you. Don't be emotional.
"You can trust me because I love you. Of course I was upset when I found out your plan to kill everyone at the prison. You know how I feel about unnecessary killing," I said moving closer.
"And now you are okay with it? You will be with me even if I kill everyone over at the prison you care about? No questions asked," Philip whispered in my ears.
"Yes. I won't question what you do anymore. I will trust all your decisions. And all I want in return is your forgiveness," I said looking into his eyes.
"This all sounds too good to be true, Andrea," Philip said moving closer. He pressed his lips against mine, and I made myself kiss him back. His hands were in blonde hair and he was moving me around like a rag doll.
"Would I come back on my own knowing that you will probably kill me if I did not really love you? What we had was real," I said when he finally pulled away.
"I want to believe you, Andrea," Philip said taking my hand.
"Who has been there for you? I have had your back this whole time," I said.
"I don't know. You were a lawyer, right? That means you are a good liar," Philip said.
"I was a civil rights lawyer not a defense. And I could not lie to you. Now let's go back home," I said taking his hand.
"If that is what you want. I know my bed has been missing you," He smirked.
I looked into his eyes, and said nothing. His hand was locked into mine, and if I did not know better I would think he had changed. But I knew better.
"I do love you, Andrea," Philip muttered.
"I know," I said unable to say it back again. Lying was not an easy thing for me to do, but I had to pull this off. For Rick, Carl, and baby Judith. I only hoped Rick would understand why I had to leave.
