Anime: Axis Powers Hetalia
Rating: T
Warnings: boy on boy on boy love. (No I don't mean threesome ._.)
Pairings: S. ItalyxGermany. Or is it GermanyxS. Italy?
Disclaimer: Me no own the hetalia of the axis of the powers.
Notes: This is either very anticlimactic or just very stupid climactic.
The German officer arrived before his lover's Italian home. He made it to the porch and rang the doorbell. He stood there patiently as he heard some shuffling coming from inside. The door opened, revealing Romano, expressing shock and irritation, for he was likely going to have to improvise and lie his way out of this one to, if he can that is. He then noticed Germany wearing his official uniform, SS hat and badges and all.
"Wh-Why are you wearing your Nazi uniform?" he asked hesitantly, "We ain't Jews, dammit! Goodbye!" He was about to slam the door shut but Germany caught the door with his foot.
"Are you going to let me in or am I going to have to let myself in?" said the officer, all-serious. Romano gulped and swung open the door, letting Germany inside. Germany looked around thoughtfully, as he has never entered the home before. He removed his hat and placed it on the coat rack. Romano stood there, his heart beating fast and sweating in excessive amounts.
"Where is your brother?" asked Germany, still looking around.
"None of yer damned business, you Nazi potato!" replied Romano, very in character today. Just then Veneziano sauntered into living room, feeling great, as he had just eaten a very nice bowl of pasta. He noticed Germany and opened his eyes for once.
"Germany? What are you doing here?" he asked. Germany went up to him and grabbed both of Veneziano's hands. He looked into his incorrect lover's eyes.
"Italy, please tell me the truth." He asked solemnly.
"Wha-what truth? And what did you say to me before the line went dead?"
Romano stood in the background, watching in horror as Germany brought Veneziano's hands to his lips, lightly kissing them. Italy responded to Germany's affection by touching the German's cheek. Romano let out a horrid scream.
"DON'T TOUCH HIM, DAMMIT!" he covered his mouth when he realized what he said. His brother looked over to him.
"My big brother cares about my well being!" he assumed happily, closing his eyes.
"That's not it, dammit!" he further commented. He was breathing heavily at this point.
Don't… don't touch Germany! Romano thought, completely helpless. Your not his lover dammit, I am! You could never pleasure him as I could… I'm the only one who can!
"Stop touching each other!" he cried out to both of them, "Just, stop!" Italy let go of Germany and left for his brother's side. Romano was on his knees, feeling extremely weak. He felt he might even throw up.
"Big brother! Are you all right? You look very sick! Maybe it is you who has caught 'the plague'!" Veneziano tried to reason out his brother's sudden fatigue.
"You fucking idiot, there is no plague!" cursed Romano, pulling on his brother's ahoge, letting out a slight squeal from Veneziano. Germany stepped into the brothers' quarrel and asked desperately, "Would someone please tell me what's going on?"
Romano did the only thing he could do in order to stall the German.
So he kissed Germany.
Yes, this time as himself, Romano.
He stood up, roughly grabbed the German's chin, and planted one on those desperate lips. When Romano pulled himself away, the German's face was priceless.
He staggered back, having to grab the side of a nearby sofa to keep balance. Romano's face was all serious, hoping by now the officer would understand. Unfortunately, Germany didn't understand. The fucking SS officer still couldn't understand. He may have had the intelligence exceeding Einstein, but he was as dumb as a doornail when it came to love. Instead of staying and trying to reason as he usually would when he came across as complex situation, he did something that would deem him a traitor if he ever did this in a military situation.
He left the scene.
Very suddenly and casually, too. He regained his balance, made his way to the door, put his hat back on, opened the door and left, closing it behind him. Romano let out a slight sob before running off to his room. Veneziano was left alone in the living room, as confused as Germany was. He didn't know what to make of the whole fiasco. He may as well be half dead in the brain now.
It's safe to say everyone is half brain dead now. But half brain dead or not, Romano couldn't let things end like this. He left his home, running to find Germany. He found him walking along a dirt road towards his home. He heard his name being called and turned around, but looked back ahead when he saw it was Romano. Romano caught up to him and grabbed the stubborn German by his jacket.
"Germany!"
Germany yanked himself away.
"Please listen to me!" pleaded Romano.
"For what?" said Germany, finally facing him, "I don't understand you, Romano! I don't understand anything right now!"
"Then I'll explain everything to you!"
"No. No you won't. You're going to twist things around and fool me. Romano, I don't know why you kissed me, but let me assure you, I can't love you."
Germany's words stung Romano. Nevertheless, he continued.
"Too late! I've been fooling you for the past week!"
"Ridiculous. You are a liar. Your brother was never struck my lightning, and you never had malaria. You are so full of lies I don't even know if I'm really speaking to Romano."
"Trust me, you are this time!"
"Whatever, I'm going home." Germany started to walk again, but Romano persisted.
"You never had sex with Veneziano!" blurted out Romano. Germany stopped walking.
"What did you just say…?" he croaked out.
"You never had sex with my brother. My brother never told you he loved you… he never did because… I did! It was all me!" Romano grabbed Germany's shoulders. "The day you knocked Veneziano into the cart of tomatoes was not actually Veneziano! It was me! Everything you thought you ever did with Veneziano since last Monday was with me. I'm sorry I deceived you, I was joking around at first but as I continued to impersonate my brother I… I fell in love with you. Germany, I love you. Me, Romano." He gripped Germany's shoulders tighter and looked into his blue eyes, trying to emulate how he did so the first time he kissed Germany. But Germany did not look into Romano's. Instead, he pushed him off.
"You are so full of shit." Muttered Germany, quite uncharacteristically. "No one would ever believe the load of garbage you just said."
Germany adjusted his hat and continued walking. Romano watched as Germany walked away, getting smaller and smaller as the distance between them increased. He kept watching until Germany disappeared under the horizon. Romano too left for home, only to be bombarded with questions from his brother. He ignored his brother and locked himself up in his room.
I have just ruined the relationship I apparently never had with Germany in less than thirty goddamn minutes.
He realized the only way Germany would ever believe him was to make another visit as Veneziano, and hopefully, the last visit he would ever have to make as his brother.
This shit's ending tonight.
…Or tomorrow.
My soap is on.
[[Confused? Me too.]]
