This was written solely because I wanted to title something "Pie in the Sky." I just kind of worked from there. That's my excuse for the pointlessness.


It was as close to normal as it ever got around Alice Academy, possibly closer than usual. There was surprisingly little tomfoolery going on in the middle-school division. Most everyone was merely sitting down, shutting up, and doing their work (or pretending to) as per the teacher's instructions.

Sitting still, being quiet, and most of all, doing work were mysteriously absent from Koko's list of strong points. Thus, he was firmly in the pretending-to-work camp. Thankfully, Kitsuneme was there along with him, playing an unusually good game of "Dude, Look at That Cloud!"

"Hey," he began, after a prolonged period of looking out the window to try and locate the turtle-on-a-skateboard-shaped cloud that Kitsuneme had pointed out. "You know that song?"

"Man," Kitsuneme muttered. "You're going to have to be more specific."

Koko made a few sweeping motions above his head. "Oh, you know the one, about the bananas."

Kitsuneme replied with the universally accepted "Call Me" gesture. "Bananaphone?"

"No, the one, you know how it goes…. There are no bananas in the sky… Y'know?"

He nodded emphatically in recognition, happily singing the rest of the little tune. "There's a sun, and a moon, and some coconut cream pie, but there are no bananas in the sky… Yeah. What about it?"

"I've been thinking…" Koko mused. "Why would there be coconut cream pie in the sky if there aren't any bananas? I mean, if there were bananas in the sky, then there could be banana cream pie in the sky, and wouldn't that be better? Heck, if coconut cream pie can get in the sky, then why can't there be ice cream or rabbits or actual people in the sky? It's just a song. Why are they just taking this out on bananas?" He nodded a couple times. "You get what I'm saying?"

"Wow, dude," Kitsuneme replied, a little taken aback. "I think you need to chill. They only used 'coconut cream pie' because it rhymes."

Sumire's pencil lead snapped, again. The thing was worthless, really. But she hadn't really been concentrating on sharpening it anyway. She'd been listening to Koko and Kitsuneme discuss bananas. If there was something to be said for the pair of them, it was that they were never boring. But they were certainly stupid sometimes.

"You guys are idiots," she interjected, shoving her pencil back in the sharpener.

"Excuse me?"

"Coconut cream pie is a metaphor. They're talking about clouds."

Koko rolled his eyes sarcastically. "Ahhh… I get it now… it's a metaphor. Thanks loads, Sumi."

She pulled her pencil out of the pencil sharpener, testing it on her thumb. The lead was too sharp, and instantly broke off with the slightest bit of pressure. She cursed, jamming it back into the electric sharpener and sighing in exasperation when it was too short to be pulled back out. Giving up, she turned back to Koko. "Do you even know what a metaphor is?"

"It's like when you compare one thing to another, isn't it?" Kitsuneme offered. "You know, like 'the guy was dead as a doornail." He paused for a few seconds, contemplating. "What's a doornail, and why's it dead?"

"You're both morons," Sumire replied. "That's a simile. What grade are you in, again?"

"Well, then," Koko suggested. "Why don't you just remind us what a metaphor is and save us the trouble of guessing?"

Sumire huffed exasperatedly. "Fine. Well, a metaphor's pretty much like a simile, except more figurative and symbolic. You don't use the 'like' or 'as' or whatever."

Koko blinked. "I don't get it."

"I don't know what to tell you," Sumire muttered. "I give up. Hey, Iinchou." She prodded Yuu in the shoulder, who had been trying to explain yesterday's biology lesson to Mikan. "Give us an example of a metaphor."

Yuu scratched his head. "Well, if I were to say that Mikan-chan looks blue," which, Koko noted, she certainly did, dejected at her lack of biology knowledge, "I'd mean that she looks sad, not literally blue."

"Oh." Koko nodded in comprehension. "So, if I were to walk up to Sumire and say, 'you're a crazy bitch,' then it'd be a metaphor, 'cause she's not actually a crazy girl-dog."

"I d-don't think you're getting the—"

Sumire narrowed her eyes at him threateningly. "Excuse me?"

He ignored her, turning back to Kitsuneme. "And if I told her, 'you're like a crazy bitch,' then it'd be a simile, right?"

"No, dude," Kitsuneme replied, grinning. "You'd be a valley girl. You know." He put on a girly voice. "You're like, a crazy bitch, like, ehmagawd."

"You're both dead," hissed Sumire.

"Metaphorically speaking," Koko snickered, "As doornails?"

"Metaphorically speaking, you're an ass!" Sumire shouted, finally losing it.

Kitsuneme merely watched the two of them with mild interest. "Ah, Koko, the doornail one was a simile, remember?"


Bananas in the sky for the win! Now that brings back memories.

Review... Please?