Toshiro Hitsugaya had known Rangiku Matsumoto long before she became his lieutenant. He knew her to be loud, lazy, and lascivious most of the time, but he knew she was caring and had a serious side. This Matsumoto though that had come into work this day was none of those things; she was reclusive, silent, still clearly shaken from the attacks a few nights ago. Captain Unohana assured Toshiro there was no reason to be concerned for Matsumoto's physical health. She would not talk about what happened that night. He knew she had spoken with the Twelfth Division, as had Hisagi and Rukia, and was deeply concerned about how withdrawn she was. Toshiro decided to let it go for now, knowing despite Matsumoto's demeanor, she was tough and could take care of herself. She will come to me when she is ready and needs to.

&&&&&

Shuuhei Hisagi had returned to his captaincy duties. He was less talkative though, his thoughts constantly analyzing the sequence of events that had unfolded. There had to be a purpose to what he and Rangiku experienced… how could such an intimate attack be random? The worst part of it was how real it had been, the sights, the smells, the feeling of the surroundings… Everyone in Soul Society had experienced the illusions of Aizen, but this was something else. Hisagi wanted to believe Aizen had been destroyed that day, but there was no certain guarantee of anything. These incidents did not match Aizen's style, but it was the only thing coming to Hisagi's head. If you are behind this Aizen we will absolutely take you down.

&&&&&

Byakuya had not slept since Rukia had nearly drowned. The two most precious people in his heart tortured his mind, Hisana with the sadness he had seen in her eyes, and images of Rukia, nearly dead beneath the water… It made him uneasy to admit that his life largely revolved around Rukia. Of course there was his responsibilities, which naturally came first. But why was it worth upholding? Naturally there was his oath to his parents, his clan, his own reputation, all to maintain the Kuchiki status and legacy… but Rukia being in his life though just seemed to give his duties an entirely different purpose, it was through these duties that he could ultimately provide and care for her. Her being in his life had filled the emptiness Hisana's death had cursed upon him.

Masking his reiatsu, he would go to the infirmary in the Fourth Division every day for hours, watching over her as she rested. He never would enter her room to talk to her. He did not want her to notice him. I should not be here… Nearly every time, unless she was sleeping, Ichigo was there. They were so comfortable with one another, because they are meant for one another… The right thing to do felt so blatantly obvious, but it would be the hardest thing to do…

&&&&&

Captain Retsu Unohana noticed Byakuya's behavior in an instant. Normally, he would visit with Rukia, check once a day to see if she was well. But he was coming many times, and keeping away from her. Rukia was in a private area of the medical wing, so Byakuya was safe from others becoming aware of his frequency. Renji and Ichigo had come by of course, Orihime, Uryuu, and Chad as well. Byakuya maintained his distance from them, this was not out of character, but his avoidance was. She approached him gently.

'Captain Kuchiki, Miss Rukia would be most please if she saw you. She has asked for you,' Unohana told him, smiling slightly.

Byakuya spoke sternly, 'if she has asked for me you may tell her I hope she is well.'

Unohana narrowed her eyes, puzzled by his answer, 'why do you not go speak with her? You have visited to check on her quite often Captain Kuchiki.'

'I come to see that her health is in order, not to entertain her while she is here,' he replied, sounding his usual serious self, 'she has other company for such purposes.'

Unohana looked to her side, peering through the window into Rukia's room. She was sitting with the Karakura gang, Ichigo very noticeably sitting close to her. She had known for a long time that Byakuya was bothered by Rukia's resemblance to Hisana; she had suspected for a long time that Byakuya was bothered by his growing affections for Rukia. That night she had checked on Rukia at the Kuchiki manor, Rukia had been found in Byakuya's bedroom. She was not one to for assumptions, but she knew that Rukia was long past an age where she would be permitted to enter into an elder's room for night terrors, nor were nobles open to such a custom for their children. What gave it away most obviously for Unohana was the tenderness in Byakuya's eyes, as he would gaze at Rukia. Worry coated his voice like mint when he would ask Unohana questions regarding her injuries and health. Byakuya was falling for Rukia. Now Ichigo Kurosaki was here… suddenly the picture was clear.

'Perhaps when Kurosaki leaves, Captain Kuchiki will feel more inclined to speak with Miss Rukia?' she suggested, a slight hint of cheekiness.

Byakuya's lips tightened, he closed his eyes, 'as I said. I am not here to entertain her while she is ill. I will see her upon her return home.' With that he excused himself. Unohana couldn't help but smile and sigh as she watched the nobleman take off. Byakuya for such an intelligent man you can be very foolish sometimes.

&&&&&

When Rukia was at last allowed to go home, she found the manor empty, a feeling she had not felt in such a long time. Her and Byakuya's time together had made this place feel like a home, she had looked forward to coming here after work to see him. She was hurt that he had not come to see her while she was under the care of the Fourth Division. He had sent brief messages via Captain Unohana, but that hardly constituted for anything. I guess he is busy with his division… and patrolling…

She was alone in her room again this evening, reading some silly book that Uryuu had brought her from the Human World. She loved reading the mangas and romance novels, finding them greatly entertaining. It had been great spending time with them while she was recovering, especially with Ichigo.

The awkwardness that had developed between them was soon long forgotten. Ichigo had come by everyday, and would stay for hours, even when the gang had left. She noticed that Chad, Uryuu, and Orihime had given Ichigo strange looks when he would stay, but she knew it had to be because they were looking out for both of them. Maybe they could never be lovers again, Rukia was sure they never could be, but she knew now they could be friends again. It was hard though, to be with him. She did still love him. Being with Ichigo was like walking through a forest with scattered pits of quick sand, Rukia would walk with ease through it and then find herself consumed and enclosed with old feelings… are feelings ever truly old?

Suddenly, she heard a tapping at her window. Slightly apprehensive of this, she approached with caution, opening it up only to find Ichigo Kurosaki, sitting on the roof of the manor. 'Ichigo?' she asked, smiling.

'Like old times hey?' he laughed. It was true, when they were dating, he always would hop on the roof much to Byakuya's annoyance. Rukia never minded though, she was notorious for her window entrances.

'What are you doing up here Kurosaki?' she inquired; she knew he had to be up to something.

Ichigo grinned, 'I was thinking you would like to come and train a bit with us, you know, the usual crew. I know you don't have patrolling shifts, and with all this sick time I'm worried you'll lose your techniques.'

It was true, since Rukia, Matsumoto, and Hisagi had experienced similar phenomenon, they were excused from the night watch shifts. This bothered Rukia because she hated feeling helpless. Nothing angered her more than how this 'thing' targeted her. Is it because I am weak… 'Sure,' she replied, smiling. 'Where are you going to be?'

'Eleventh Division I think, it is always a gong show there, even in times like these. But come to Renji's first,' Ichigo said. 'Or, do you want to head there now with me or…'

'I will come in a bit,' Rukia said, 'I just want to wait for… Nii-sama to return home. I have not seen very much of him in the past few days.'

'Guess he has been busy dealing with stuff,' Ichigo replied, 'should've still come and seen you. I'll catch you later, Rukia.' Ichigo touched her cheek lightly and smiled at her. He then jumped off the roof into the night. Rukia felt tingles where he had touched her, but quickly shook them out. His smile still brought butterflies to her stomach but… it felt over. Time had formed a finite barrier between them. Even when they talked when she was ill, as they had laughed, recalling memories together, laughing at new jokes Rukia felt that the spark that was once between them was dimmed. Ichigo and I can never be together again, but I always want him in my life; I will always have love for him.

&&&&&

The Twelfth Division was lost. Nothing was making sense; there was no new data. The only difference was the hallucinations of Lieutenant Matsumoto and Captain Hisagi. Captain Kurotsuchi, at long last, was now interested in the development that was unfolding before him. He was facing a wall with all the data pinned up on it, trying to draw some conclusion, formulate some sort of hypothesis.

'Hmm,' he thought, 'the only things these hallucinations have in common are death… death by a stab wound, death by falling, death by drowning. But are they hallucinations, dreams, or illusions?'

He reviewed quickly, their testimonies. 'Rukia sees a little boy, Matsumoto and Hisagi a girl… both with their eyes missing, their mouths stitched shut—' his thought pattern was interrupted by yelling from his subordinates. Perhaps that is something to implement here… he thought as he opened his door to yell at them, 'Silence! Unless you have found something there is no need for such annoying disturbances!'

'Our apologies Captain Kurotsuchi!' they all shouted.

Captain Kurotsuchi slammed his door, returning to his work. 'Rukia could not hear sounds… Matsumoto and Hisagi could… Rukia somehow traveled from the Kuchiki manor to the lake by the Divisions… unseen by anyone… curious. I need to detect the movement of this force to and from Soul Society… I need to understand how it is arriving and the mechanism of attack… Nemu! Get in here!' Since this attacker seems to have a fascination with Rukia Kuchiki, I will use her to lead me to him…

&&&&&

Rukia dressed herself for training and was growing impatient of waiting for Byakuya to return. Where is he? What could he possibly be doing? She could not sense his reiatsu nearby and decided to go and see him in his office. She missed him, greatly. Rukia felt loneliness in her heart having been apart from him for days. Each moment someone came to her room she had hoped it would be him… but he never came. She never sensed him near there at all. This scared her, a lot. She was worried he mistook her hesitations for a rejection. Something definitely was not right between them. Maybe she was not sure if what they had and could have was 'perfect' but love never was. Love is hard, it is learned, worked for, and when true, extends beyond boundaries, beyond time, beyond anything… I don't know how things will work out between us, I love you Byakuya, I cannot be without you, you hold my heart too… It was time to stop holding back.

&&&&&

Hisana…

He could not explain it. Nothing made sense about what he had seen, what he had felt. It was her reiatsu, that warm, loving feeling he always had around her… it was distinct, different from anything… and he had felt it again after so long. Byakuya knew it had to be some sort of illusion. This enemy had personal information… but what was it? Byakuya did not mention this to the Twelfth Division, instead confiding in Yoruichi Shihouin who in turn was going to let Urahara know…

'What did you see Byakuya?' Yoruichi asked. She was nervous because whatever it had been, it had had a profound effect on Byakuya. For him to come to her, it had to be a big deal.

'Hisana,' he said quietly, 'it was Hisana.'

'This enemy must know you, how it targets Rukia and now he shows you an illusion of Hisana?'

'It was not an illusion,' Byakuya replied. He avoided looking at her.

Yoruichi remained silent. Byakuya was a rational man; he was calm even in the most turbulent of times. It was shaking her up to hear him say this with such confidence. 'I will tell Urahara. Do you think this could be an enemy of the Kuchiki house?'

'With what purpose would it serve to do so?' he asked. 'I fail to comprehend the intentions of this intruder. But I do not feel that they are so single-minded and focused. There is an indefinite purpose to these actions.'

Hisana… her hurt expression haunted him. He felt her eyes on him everywhere he went. Her words, asking him why… He had rethought his feelings for Rukia. Perhaps this was guilt over his failures at protecting her… if he loved Rukia, and she loved him… he could hurt her horribly. If he made her his wife, she would be subjected to a life of submission, he would make her miserable.

Byakuya cringed when he felt Rukia's reiatsu approaching. He did not wish to see her, but it was inevitable that she would come to him eventually. Maybe it was easier this way. Rukia entered his office; she was wearing her shinigami uniform. Her healthy color was back she looked radiant. She is not mine…

'Byakuya I…' her voice was shy and unsure, 'where have you been? I… I've missed you greatly.'

Byakuya kept his eyes on his paperwork. 'I see you are feeling better.'

Rukia was thrown off by his coldness. 'Yes, I came home the other day.' She felt horribly intimidated for some reason, her stomach tender from her nerves.

'If there is no business that keeps you here you are dismissed,' he said, nonchalantly.

Rukia felt her heart drop, she took a step towards him, 'Byakuya, why…'

'Rukia please do not forget your formalities. It is not becoming of a noblewoman to speak in such a manner.' She stopped dead in her tracks.

Her head was spinning. 'What… but we are alone?'

Byakuya could sense her discomfort. Part of him held back, just for a moment. It had to be done. 'My recent behavior is not befitting of a brother to his sister. My actions towards you have been inappropriate.'

The only reason why Rukia knew she was still conscious was the coolness from her tears on her cheek. 'Byakuya what are you saying?'

'Please remember your place in this family Rukia, and the proper way to address your older brother.' Byakuya wished it did not have to be this way. But after seeing how Ichigo and Rukia were together, and considering the difficulties and stresses of a long-term relationship would be, he knew this was the best thing he could do. 'I apologize that I allowed my grief for Hisana influence my relationship with you. It shall not happen again.'

His words hit Rukia, square in the heart like a flying dagger. They pierced cleanly through her, stinging at first, the pain then dissipating into numbness. She wiped the tears from her face, desperately trying to regain her composure. 'I understand, Nii-sama,' she replied, her voice sounding surprising strong. He had wrapped himself inwards, away from her within a fabric of honorifics, and legality. She turned to leave his office, not bothering to excuse her self. He had dismissed her the moment she walked through the door.

Byakuya knew he had broken her heart, but either way it would have happened. Ichigo was here now and things were as they should be. Byakuya resolved he would do all in his power and more to see that Ichigo and Rukia could be together. He had let his pride go… he was nothing now, just a nobleman. But it would be temporary; he would forget this and tomorrow would be another day.

&&&&&

Rukia couldn't help the tears that fell as she left Byakuya's office. She tripped, struggled to stand and eventually let herself fall under a tree. Her tears fell from her eyes; she held her legs close for comfort. She felt alone. But it had to happen… it was foolish to think her and Byakuya could be together. They were from two different worlds, her adoption merely a bridge between them that could easily be taken down. She had to stay on her side; she could never completely cross over to his…

Rukia wiped her eyes, and breathed deeply. Emotions were such a funny thing. There were different names and connotations associated with every one, yet they were not so obvious. Grief, love, comfort, hurt… so similar. Somehow she had managed to intertwine them and allowed herself to be tangled within them. Now that the strings were straightened, she could see each one for what they were, and where she went wrong. She had been stuck in a fog of misconception that Byakuya now had so kindly guided her out of.

Staring out ahead of her she looked towards the direction of Renji's apartment. She pulled herself up, and headed towards there. If Byakuya wanted it done, then it was done. She would not beg for him back. The only way to go from here was forward. She would not let her heart ache for him. She would not cry another tear for him. It was now perfectly clear that she could only trust and depend on herself… an enemy was out there, and it had a close eye on her. It was time to clear her mind of Byakuya of Ichigo, of everything that gave the enemy something to hide behind. When you come for me again, I will see you, and I will fight you.

**author's note: sorry it has been awhile, life has been crazy.

i kno this chapter is sad... but remember, always in life:

"Fall down seven times, get up eight" ~ Japanese proverb