It always tripped me out how Shakespeare apparently existed in the fantasy world of Earthland.

Thank you as always everyone who reviewed! Keep 'em coming! :D

Ke$ha in general makes me think of Fairy Tail~ :D


YOU KNOW WE'RE SUPERSTARS


Jellal hangs over the railing of the top floor, rocking back and forth like a suspended punching bag, struck hard and sent reeling. I might fall, he thinks vaguely. Woop, woop, alley-oop, over we go! DEAD. There are a hundred little people below him. He sees white and blue and green and pink and RED. Over there is Erza, off in a corner, drinking Natsu Dragneel under a table...

And kissing him between shots.

Hnn.

Levy's voice sounds from below. She cuts a dashing figure, with her chest puffed out and her toe pointed gracefully behind her. She giggles, chugs grog from a can and looks up at him, cheeks flushed with alcohol. "But soft! What light through yonder window breaks," she projects, waving her arms in a way akin to grace. "It is the east, and Jellaliette is the sun!"

The answer to her poetry is a spray of spittle as Jellal cracks up and almost falls off the top floor. "You're GREAT!"

"Arise, fair sun, and... and..." Levy's face contorts in a dramatic frown. "I forget the rest! Forgive me, Jellaliette, but you're pretty fine, you know!"

"I'll take it!" he shouts. He takes up a pose, using the free fingers on his beer-hand to fan his face as his other goes straight to his chest in a terrible Be still, my beating heart! impression. "Oh Levy-o, Levy-o, wherefore art thou such an incompetent swine, Levy-o?"

"Hey!"

"Since yonder prose is lacking, I shalt use thee as nothing more than a tool for mine own bedchambers," Jellaliette declares, adding a slightly different spin to the age-old love story. "Perchance thou wouldst also bring that Mercutio hence? Now he's a dish." He waggles his eyebrows and Levy bursts out laughing, looking for someone to join them. "Lucy!" she cries, just as the blonde manages to detach herself from a persistently pervy lion spirit. "Come here! Be Mercutio!"

Lucy bounces innocently onto the scene, a bright pink drink in her hand. She's the girliest thing Jellal has ever seen, with her big wide eyes and her sparkly shoes. She evokes a certain sort of curiosity in him, because she is surprisingly normal in a guild full of freaks – a rose amongst thorns of ice and fire and steel. "Lucutio!" he simpers, dancing about in between heavy swigs. "Wouldst thou do me the honour of..." He pauses, turns up his nose nobly. "... ploughing me like a cornfield?"

Lucy turns bright red and Levy falls to her knees laughing. Jellal does much the same, smacking his head hard on the wooden railing and staggering backwards, losing balance and tumbling to the ground. Above him there are lights, but they don't really register. He recognises blurry, bright and glowing, but nothing else. Fairy Tail's bitter homemade beer splashes across his lips, runs down his chin to pool in the hollow of his neck. Trying to drink from a bottle whilst lying down and being terribly uncoordinated actually isn't that clever, go figure. From below, Levy-o's voice rings clear.

"Lucutio, you ass! You killed Jellaliette!" Over the general chatter of the guild he hears the sound of small feet speeding towards him. Levy's by his side in moments, shaking him as he laughs deliriously, absent of sense and time and anything rational like that. "Oh no! Jellaliette has DIED. Now I will die TOO."

She falls across his torso. He hits her on the head with his bottle. "What was that? That wasn't romantic at all!"

"What? Not enough useless love confessions? Did I not gurgle enough as I died?" She grins at him cheekily from over her arm. "I could try again?"

"No second-chances for star-crossed lovers," Jellal says sagely, spilling more drink on his neck and the floor in an attempt to get it into his mouth. Levy props herself up on his stomach. "I dunno about that," she tells him. "You and Erza got a second chance, right?"

He sighs, long and loud and ridiculously, eyes rolling back in his head. "Nnn," is all he says. In theory, perhaps she's right – they're guildmates now, together in a sense. But between shots of fiery tequila, he's seen her taste the Salamander, and he's certain she wants no part in his romance. Levy casts a look in the direction of the competitive pair, even though she cannot see them through the wooden railing. She plays with her hair.

"So... it's not happening? You and her?"

"Not in this lifetime," he hiccups. "It's fine, it's fine. The more I drink the less I worry. She's always been honest. She's made herself clear. Erza Scarlet and Jellal Fernandes are friends, so hand me another bottle of... something, if you please. Keep me drugged up nicely, Levy-o."

She complies with his wish as he throws his empty bottle away. A bottle of cider three-quarters full finds its way to his hand. He starts at it with gusto, the fizz bubbling in his throat.

"I'm glad you can let loose," she tells him, smiling. "I think Erza's glad that she can, too."

He shrugs, a strange sensation whilst on his back, on the floor, with a bookworm on top of him. "I talked to her before, and she didn't seem upset about... Well, the things that I've done, so... She says kisses hardly matter, but she's made it clear she won't take them from me. I figure I should just go with whatever feels... fun. I'm sick of sadness. Maybe I'll get lucky and she'll get jealous," he muses. "Or, I might find that I'm not so in love with her after all, and can stop deluding myself. We'll be friends like she wants."

"What are the chances of that happening?"

Jellal weighs it with his tongue poking from his mouth; the ultimate sign of intense concentration. Levy already knows the answer, and sympathises. Her own feelings toward a particular guy are certain, but she's still waiting for him, drifting through a vague sort of relationship limbo. She will kiss other boys and he'll kiss other girls until he's decided for certain what he wants.

She feels that Erza might just be the same.

:-

"So we hadn't kissed at that point?" Jellal asked, grinning at their antics in the photo. "Didn't hook in, hook up, mack on, make out?" Levy leaned forward with her face in her hands.

"Nope," she told him. "We D&M'd instead."

He looked startled. "Did I -"

"It wasn't anything... crazy related, if that's what you're wondering," she smiled, touching his arm, muscle strong, skin sticky. "It was just stuff about Erza. Do you remember anything about that?"

He chewed his lip, frowning. "About Erza...? I can remember something... that..." He rubbed the back of his head, his hair grotty, disgusting, greasy with random shit, wet and matted. "I remember something about... zucchinis."

Levy gave him a long, steady look, as if trying to figure out whether he was joking or not. "I... yeah. I don't know anything about that," she said slowly. Jellal chuckled and rubbed his eyes.

"That's okay. But whether I remember anything happening between the two of us?" He sighed. "The answer is no. Did anything happen?"

"Mirajane knows more about that than I would," Levy told him hesitantly. "But I was with you when – Well, you were with me when..." She flipped the next picture around for him to see. "We were together when this happened."

And she showed him her next picture.


WE ARE WHO WE ARE!


Yes, Jellal is a terrible slut.

But after a whole year of no one for company, he's a little starved for human affection... LET US CHEER HIM-

GO, SON! GO! GET TAIL!