The sheet was curled into her fist, her toes pointed so hard she began to feel her leg cramping, but none of it mattered. There was a gasp, a bright light, a pinch at her breast, and everything was oblivion.

Hermione opened her eyes for the third time to see him sleeping soundlessly beside her. His chest practically hairless apart from the light peach fuzz that dusted along the surface. She didn't know what was real anymore. So many scenarios had come and gone in her dreams, she couldn't recognize the truth from the altered memories. The only memory she was certain wasn't altered…was the beginning.


"Breath Hermione" he whispered.

She felt calm.

He used her name, and it was almost like a comfort blanket was being handed to her thread by thread. She should be disgusted and hate him for using her name like this, but with the slight reassuring comfort that it brought, she accepted his words.

Denying the only comfort she found would make this situation worse. Instead, she used it to her advantage, took a deep breath and let the nightgown slip down over her shoulders and down her thinned curves.

This was hardly the first time she'd been naked before him, but this time was much, much different.

He was staring at her. Not her body, but her eyes and she looked down in shame.

If only their younger selves knew what horrors they would live through. She bit her lip and looked up at the sound of him clearing his throat.

He gestured to the bed as he unbuttoned his waistcoat and dress-shirt.

In a self-conscious blur she made her way onto the bed, leaning back against his pillows, her ashen legs standing out against the midnight blue duvet beneath her.

She looked up to see his shirt and waistcoat hanging over the back of his desk chair, his hands busy unbuckling his trousers and while he crossed his feet and casually kicked off his shoes.

It was a simple action that lost Hermione for a brief moment.

The casualness he emitted in pressing his toes against one heel and then the other. It made him seem a little more…human.

Hermione's brief oasis of wandering thoughts was ripped from her as a swift movement caught her eye and she caught her gasp too late. She looked to the canopy above her feeling her heartbeat finally catch up with her racing thoughts.

He was naked. She was naked. This was happening.

Hermione felt the bed shift beside her and in the panic that was beginning to overtake her she refused to look at him.

She felt him draw a finger down her shoulder and circle his hand around her elbow gently, cupping it.

"Look at me…" he whispered.

She could feel his body heat radiating against her side and wasn't sure if it was a sensation that made her feel cocooned or her space invaded.

"Look at me please…" he repeated.

With a shaky breath she turned her head to meet his gaze.

Her heartbeat was in her throat and she took to breathing little puffs of breath from her mouth.

"I swear to you now, that after tonight I will never again impose, request, or force you to my bed. This is for your safety as it is mine… and…. I think, for the purpose this all serves, it would be easiest if you were….allowing of tonight."

He was searching her face, his eyes moving across her features like she was a page of a book.

"Do you understand?" he could be quiet calming even in the most tense of situations, she had learned that already.

With a weak nod, Hermione shut her eyes and accept the fact that he was more than right. If they wanted the altered memories to be believable then the real one's had to be vivid.

Slowly, she rolled onto her side to face him, his hand falling away from her elbow, resting in the space between them.

Be Allowing

She could feel every heartbeat pound in her chest; every second that ticked by was amplified by their synchronizing breaths.

It seemed like hours of lying beside him, the scent of his hair radiating from his pillows. The gentle puffs of air from his nose tickling her cheeks as he breathed calmly.

Ten minutes must have passed since she rolled onto her side, but the second hand on the clock hadn't even moved a full minute.

He opened his mouth to say something when she leaned through the last few inches of space between them, brushing her lips against his.

The disgusted feeling in her stomach was churning with butterflies.

Be Allowing

She hadn't kissed or been kissed in over two years.

Not a single caress, loving hug, and peck on the cheek for nearly 720 days.

Goosebumps shivered down her back as his lips leaned into hers and they discovered each other with the gentlest of touches and strokes.

Her hand tucked into the crook of his neck between his shoulder and his jaw. Her fingers tracing the lines his skin made as his neck bent to meet her lips.

His much larger and roughened hand slid against her hip bone and rested happily there for several minutes until she inched closer, her hand wrapping into his hair.

She missed kissing or maybe it was the nerve endings in her lips getting the better of her head.

Be Allowing

Either way, as much as she regretted to admit it, she was enjoying herself.

Malfoy's hand reached around to the small of her back, pulling her against his body with ease.

She gasped into his mouth, her lip quivering between his. He opened his eyes and whispered

"Breathe"

The word took a moment to penetrate her fear and then she took a deep breath.

The feeling of his solid erection pressed between their bodies became just another new sensation as he continued to kiss her.

His hand stirred and slowly stroked up and down her spine, making her shiver into him.

She curled her fingers around the short, fine hair behind his ear as he traced her bum and then back to her hip.

Without thinking, Hermione tried to press herself closer against him only to stop short as he let out soft moan against her lips.

She felt his hand on her hip grip tightly for a brief moment and she remembered.

His erection pulsed against her stomach at the friction and with one last

Be Allowing

She wiggled her hips a little harder and kissed him like she used to kiss Ron they were alone in the tent.

Her lips gently parted as he moaned once more, deeper and longer as she continued to wiggle her hips.

His tongue took the cue without skipping a beat, melting with hers while he held her hip tighter as she continued to roll her hips against his.

Her head cloudy with the euphoria of physical interaction and lust, Hermione hadn't noticed the pressure on her hip ceasing until a single stroke of wet heat between her legs made her eyes pop open with a gasp that instantly was mistaken for a moan.

Pulling her hand from his hair to rest on his chest, her nails scratched his skin lightly as they balled into a fist.

He was stroking her clit with feather light movements and with every soft brush came a quiver to her legs.

She was panting against his lips, her lids now heavy with the weight of arousal.

Hermione rolled her hips against his teasing touch and bit her lip as another feminine moan bubbled in her throat.

He let her roll her hips against his hand, watching her face closely as his fingertips met her opening.

She froze.

What was she doing?

She was humping his hand!

The sick feeling in her stomach returned with revenge and she bit her tongue at urge to gag.

She felt a warm breath puff against the curve of her ear and another thread of the metaphorical comfort blanket was presented,

"Breath"

She inhaled slowly.

Taking in the scent of his hair again, the light musk of her arousal and what could only be described as lust.

She held her breath, frozen in time for a few brief seconds before letting her breath go.

She was on her back in a flash, his weight balanced on his arms beside her.

Malfoy's lips were at her neck, pecking, nipping, stroking her skin with such care and definition.

It was like he was writing a secret into her skin with his lips and Hermione was desperate to know what it was.

With great hesitation, she brought her hands to his flexing arms gently resting her palms at his shoulders.

Hermione tried to find what her mother used to call 'A Happy Place', someplace she could hide away in her mind and let things happen around her, but with Malfoy's insistent nips traveling down her neck and to her breast she couldn't focus through the fuzzy feeling in her head and stomach to find one.

His lips were puckered around her nipple and while she should have been horrified or embarrassed by it, her body reacted before her mind.

Her hands tightening on his arms and her back arching, pressing herself closer.

Reading her body language, he lowered his body against hers and they both moaned softly as the base of his erection pressed against her fleshy clit.

A soft feminine sigh passed through Hermione's lips as he rolled his hips slowly against her mons and whilst fighting the urge to let her nerves shut her down once again, she took a risk.

"I'm ready" she breathed so quietly she barely heard her own voice over their breathing and the rustling of bed sheets.

He released her nipple, looking up to her face, a question in his eyes.

With a gentle roll of her hips, he had his answer.

He sat up and leaned back on his heels, his hands sliding down her slimmed curves.

Hermione watched him take in her figure inch by inch and she wondered if he was having as much difficulty as she was with detaching himself from the situation mentally.

She wondered if this was all a ploy just to get her to his bed without having to "request" it.

She wondered if he was secretly sick to his stomach having to touch her again.

She even toyed with the idea that he was being genuine… from the consideration of her virginity to her comfort.

Hermione had let those thoughts run through her mind throughout the evening and as she reviewed them in her head, he leaned down to place a kiss at the corner of her mouth.

She looked into his steely gray eyes and could feel the slick rounded head of his arousal press against her opening.

Before he could utter the word, Hermione took a deep breath and at the release she felt the heavy pressure of being stretched. At first it was an awful pain, like flesh was tearing away, but then it quickly became something else.

He pulled away and then pushed his hips deeper, releasing his breath against her neck below her jaw.

Hermione slid her arms around his shoulders, pressing his body against hers. Her breasts pressed against his chest while he continued to stretch her slowly.

After the gentle pains of tightness faded into relaxed pulses Hermione counted in her head the slow rhythm he was conducting. She waited a few moments, still allowing her body to relax around him, and then met his hips with hers, pushing him all in.

They both cried out at the simple motion.

Malfoy reached down and held her hips against his, breathing against her neck in puffs of warm wet air.

Hermione could feel every inch of her core and every inch of him.

The deepest point brushing against his tip.

And while the pain never ceased it was continually overshadowed by a burning pleasure that radiated from her hips to her toes and then spiraled up her back to her neck.

"More" her voice vibrating through her throat into his lips.

Releasing his grip on her hip, he pulled out smoothly and began to set a faster rhythm.

Their hips meeting faster and faster, the gentle sounds of skin meeting becoming rough and harmonized with their breathy moans.

Hermione's brow furrowed as the pace quickened. The pain was tightening but the pleasure was building right along with it. It was a frustrating effect that had her even more desperate for the finish line.

Her body couldn't keep still beneath his and as she lifted her leg, she felt his hand brush along her bum and then down her thigh, caressing her just beneath the knee. He pushed it a little higher until she could practically kiss her knee, holding it there as he snapped his hips even faster.

Hermione reached her hands into her hair, pulling and tugging in frustration all the while moaning as the pleasure continued to flood her body. The pain was dull and pulsed through her angrily, but the equally as heavy pleasure focused in one spot and it was like a shining light. A ball of light and energy pulsing with each powerful thrust he gave.

His breathes were forced through bared teeth and grunts, the muscles in his body flexing and extending as his hips ground into hers. Her weightless leg and developed a weight with each snap his hips made and his arms were beginning burn.

Hermione looked up at him from hooded eyelids as he growled and sat up, taking both her legs and bringing her ankles to his shoulders.

She opened her eyes a little wider at this development, what was he- .

Hermione turned to faith from that point on.

The grip he took to her thighs as he snapped even faster thrusts against her feeling her already tight walls tighten around him.

"Oh God…" she moaned.

She had nothing to hold onto.

Nothing to reach for to ride out the pain and pleasure tearing through her core with such fierceness she thought she might cry.

"Oooh GOD!" she cried, her hands back in her hair, pulling through her curls inwhat she now knew was the exact definition of sexual frustration.

The thrusts were so close together the slapping of skin became one noise amidst the moans, cries, growls and pleas that filled the room.

Then, from the depths of her core, Hermione broke out into short heavy breaths. The pain making way for something more powerful. Her pleasure building with each short, desperate breath for air and it made her body shake against his.

She felt his hand leave her thigh and a soft pressure at her clit teased as the thrusts peaked and then it hit her.

She screamed.

Her head thrown against the lopsided pillow, her hands fisted around the silky duvet and her eyes shut as she basked in the bright white light beneath her lids.

Her voice now faded was replaced with his as he let out a series of shouts and swears as he filled her tightened channel with semen.

The next few moments became a blur to Hermione.

She was beneath him, their breaths brushing against each other's skin.

Hermione felt him remove himself from her and she felt cold and hallow. She almost wished it back, but as the awkwardness set in she began to keep her thoughts in check.

Hoping to just roll over and let the moment pass, she was rudely reminded of what the purpose of this had been.

His wand at her temple as he pressed her body down again.

"Shut your eyes…" he breathed.

His cheeks were flushed and he was still out of breath.

She wasn't sure but his eyes looked positively brighter…younger.

"Shut them…" his voice calmer than a midnight sea.

And she obeyed.

Hermione shut her eyes.


She refused to open them, she refused to look down at him watching her.

But as she picked up the pace and his breathing became heavier and his voice got deeper with each hushed moan, Hermione became curious.

She opened them just barely and bit her lip at the site of him, head lolled to the side and eyes shut in mutual sexual frustration she thought.

Hermione continued to roll her hips, her thighs burning with the repetitive motion, but she kept at it if it meant his eyes stayed shut.

The sweat that covered her body in a thin layer made her shiver and lose her balance. Pressing her open palms against his chest she rolled her hips faster.

She had been staring at the carved wooden headboard when she felt the pinch at her breast and clawed her hands against his skin.

Looking down to find him mesmerized with her bouncing breasts, pinching and rolling her nipples in a way that she could easily describe as sinfully perfect.

Merlin what was he doing to her?


Hermione sighed as a pair of lips pressed themselves to hers.

The lips traveling to her neck and collar bones.

"Is this a dream?" she whispered in her sleep.

The lips responded with a hushed "Yes" and she happily let it overcome her.

Making their way through the shallow valley between her breasts and down her abdomen to her hip bones, Hermione sighed happily at the gentle touches and caresses the dream allowed her.

And just as she was about to fall deeper into sleep, she let out a breathy gasp and her back arched as the lips traveled between her thighs and greeted her mound with a warm wet kiss.

Her girlish sighs and coos continued as Malfoy delved into her womanhood and he let her dream on.


Warmth. She awoke to the warmth of sunrays beaming through the window and bathing her legs and stomach in rich autumn sunlight.

Her body ached as she tried to move and so she stayed motionless beneath the friendly rays of sun. The bed was a mess of tangled sheets and rumpled pillows.

Most importantly, she was alone in the mess of sheets and pillows. Glancing around the room she didn't find him.

She yawned and felt sleep claiming her once more. She obliged to her body's needs and let her eyelids bathe beneath the sunlight that now stretched across her body.

The Afterglow.