"Are you sure you're ready for this
"Are you sure you're ready for this?" Meredith asks, as she watches her friend tug on her blonde ponytail nervously.
"Sure? Why wouldn't I be? My stitches are out and I feel fine." Izzy replies with a falsely bright smile.
"What if you see him?" Meredith says, knowing that she is pushing the issue.
"What do you want me to say, Meredith? That I'll run and find you and fall apart? That you should follow me around just to pick up the pieces?" Izzy retorts.
Meredith stands there, stunned. "No. I just thought it might be hard for you but, umm…I guess you have it under control."
Izzy rolls her eyes and walks out of the room.
Alex walks into the cafeteria and sits down next to George.
"To what do I owe this honor?" George says, sarcastically.
"Don't get all emotional, Bambi. I just figured since we did our detective work together, we might as well eat a sandwich at the same table," Alex replies.
"Fair enough," says George.
Palmer Talbot strides confidently into the cafeteria and places his tray on Alex and George's table.
"Mind if I join you? I'll be right back. I'm just going to get a bottle of water," Palmer says.
As he walks away, George looks at Alex questioningly.
"What? This isn't middle school. You want me to kick him out of the lunch table?" Alex says, rolling his eyes.
"I guess not…I just thought…" George says.
Before George can finish, Palmer sits down.
"How are everyone's surgeries going today? I am quite impressed with the facilities at Seattle Grace," Palmer says.
"I got to deliver twins today," George says.
"I got to help rebuild someone's face. Dr. Sloan actually let me do some of the bone replacement," Alex adds.
"Do you two golf?" Palmer asks.
"Do I golf? Is the sky blue?" Alex laughs.
"I didn't know you golfed Karev! I think this is a sport that I can actually beat you at," George says confidently.
"I wanted to invite the two of you to my country club. You know, to thank you for your understanding in the matter regarding Dr. Stevens. I appreciated you coming to my home the other night to discuss the matter so civilly. I'm sure you must be very upset about her condition. I do hope she gets the help she needs. If there is anything I can do…" Palmer adds.
"Thanks Palmer. I'm sure she'll be okay. Izzy's a tough girl," George says.
"So how's Saturday for golfing?" Alex asks.
"Saturday is fine with me." Palmer says.
"Ummm…Saturday Callie is off all day with me. I promised her we'd do something together," George says, hesitantly.
"Not a problem…bring her along." Palmer says, generously.
"Good job Bambi. Let your wife invade the guys golfing day," Alex says.
"You're just mad because now two of us can kick your ass, Karev," George replies with a smile.
Izzy walks into the cafeteria. She looks around and sees George sitting at a table with Alex, laughing.
Interesting…usually Alex tortures George. It's nice to see them getting along.
As she walks towards the table, she sees the third member of their table…Palmer. She freezes, and looks around for a safe place. Like an adolescent in a new school trying to find a table that will accept her, she frantically wanders around, looking for a place to sit down and disappear.
"Izzy! Over here!" George calls.
Izzy shakes her head.
"Stevens, relax! You can still sit with us. We're all adults," Alex says, nonchalantly.
Not knowing what to do, she drops her tray and runs out of the room.
Dr. Bailey is searching for a new pair of scrubs in the closet when she hears a door slam. Startled, she turns around to find a shaky Izzy standing behind her.
"Dr. Stevens. Are you alright?"
"I can't do this. I can't work here. I can't see him everyday," Izzy stammers.
"Pull yourself together, Stevens. You are a doctor. A damn good doctor. He's taken a lot from you. Don't let him take that too. I got you in on a big surgery this afternoon. You and Yang will be scrubbing in with Burke and I. Even the chief is coming in for this one. We are doing a heart/lung transplant on an infant. Go read up about it. I left the notes for you at the nurses station," Dr. Bailey says calmly.
Izzy takes a moment to collect herself. "Thank you, Dr. Bailey. I'm fine. I just needed a moment. I appreciate you getting me in on this surgery on my first day back."
"Don't mention it. Just be prepared and don't screw up," Dr. Bailey replies, grabbing a set of scrubs and walking out of the closet.
Christina and Izzy enter the operating room dressed in their gowns. Dr. Burke, Dr. Bailey and the chief are already discussing the upcoming surgery.
"I am so excited about this surgery. I could barely sleep last night!" Christina says.
"Yeah Christina…I love it when I get to perform a heart/lung transplant on a helpless infant. What's wrong with you? Do you really have no heart?" Izzy says.
"If I don't, do you think I'd make medical history if I performed my own transplant? " Christina replies.
Izzy rolls her eyes at Christina, somewhat good naturedly and prepares for surgery.
The chief enters to operating room followed by Palmer who says, "Hello Preston. Thank you for allowing me to scrub in."
Burke nods graciously as Christina glares at him. Burke looks away. There is silence in the room, and Izzy looks uncomfortably, looking for a place to fix her eyes that doesn't involve making eye contact with anyone.
Finally, Dr. Bailey breaks the silence. "Chief, I know I'm out of line, and that this is not my place, but I can't operate with him in here."
"Dr. Bailey, you have sworn to uphold the Hippocratic Oath. You will perform this surgery with your colleagues as a professional," the chief replies, angrily.
"So did Dr. Talbot, and I cleaned up the mess of harm that he inflicted on one of MY interns. I'm not working beside him," Dr. Bailey states, firmly.
"Dr. Bailey…please don't, on my behalf," Izzy pleads, growing more uncomfortable with the myriad of eyes that are focused on her.
"Oh, this isn't on your behalf. This is out of my own personal outrage. You aren't the only one hurt by this man. Everyone who saw you after that night is tormented by the image. Maybe if Dr. Webber here would take a look at the photos that I took, he'd feel a little differently about allowing rapists to practice medicine at him hospital," Dr. Bailey says, forcefully.
"Miranda, I'm warning you…" the chief begins.
"Please…" Izzy pleads again.
"If I am making anyone uncomfortable, maybe I should step out. Our first priority is the patient, and I would never do anything to jeopardize that," Palmer says, politely.
"Does anyone notice that I have a patient to attend to?" Dr. Burke says, annoyed at the commotion.
"My sentiments, exactly," the chief says. "Now let's attend to our patient,"
Palmer moves towards the patient, and smiles at Izzy. As he moves past her, he brushes against her.
Izzy's gasp is audible as she freezes. "I can't do this," she says quietly, and exits the operating room.
"Me neither," says Dr. Bailey, following after her.
"MIRANDA!" the chief calls.
Christina pauses for a moment and looks at Burke. "I can't either. I'm sorry Preston."
Meredith comes running into the house, breathlessly. "IZZY! Are you here? IZZY?"
No answer.
"IZZY!! Everyone is looking for you!" Meredith screams.
No answer.
Meredith flings open the door to Izzy's room and finds the window open.
"No…please no…." Meredith whispers.
She looks out the window to see Izzy sitting on the overhang of the roof, looking down at the long drop that separates her from the ground.
"Izzy, please come inside," Meredith begs.
"Did you ever notice how high up my room is?" Izzy asks.
"Yes. I'm afraid of heights. That's why this is your room and not mine. Please come inside, Iz. I know it was a rough day…let's just talk inside," Meredith says, nervously.
"It's always going to be rough day. It's always going to be a day where I remember what happened. Always a day that I remember who I am, and what I brought on myself," Izzy says, distantly.
"I'm coming out there. I'm terrified of heights, but I'm coming out there with you," Meredith says, as she tentatively climbs out on the ledge.
"Izzy…I don't really know what to say that will help. I'm not good at this sort of thing. All I know, is that none of this is your fault. You were violated in the worst way. I don't care what anyone else thinks. I know what I saw that night. I saw you all bloody and shaking and scared, and held your hand during the exam. I watched you try to disappear so you didn't have to feel anything. But I've also seen you at your best. I've seen you at your most annoying and optimistic. I've watched you fight your way back to respectability at work after Denny died. You funded the clinic, which has helped so many people. You've done so much to help other people. Now its time to help yourself," Meredith says.
"George and Alex sat with him at lunch. I heard through the grapevine that he's golfing with them on Saturday. He's taken my friends, he's in my surgeries, he's on my body, and he's in my nightmares every night. He's never going to leave me, Meredith. Never," Izzy says, flatly.
"Dr. Bailey and Christina, two of the most motivated surgeons we know, walked out of a ground breaking surgery today out of respect for you. I am sitting on the roof, trying not to let you know that I want to throw up out of fear right now. You have people who care about you and want to help you. Please…let us."
"How? How can anyone help me?" Izzy asks.
"I don't know, but I'll find out. We'll think of something. I promise. Just come inside." Meredith says.
Alex, George, and Callie walk toward the enormous golf course as their eyes grow wide.
"I still feel weird about this. I mean Izzy won't even look at me…What if…" George wonders out loud.
"You heard what the guy said. Come on…its consistent with Izzy. I know she's your best friend, but she's always been unstable. She cut Denny's LVAD wire! I mean, come on George," Callie says.
"I know…but even if his story is true, shouldn't I be there with her, rather than golfing with him?" George says.
"Can we have one day where we don't talk about Izzy? Can't we just enjoy ourselves together?" Callie asks.
George is silent. He knows how far he and Callie have come since his affair with Izzy. He wants her to trust him again, so he changes the subject.
"This is a little different from where I grew up golfing. My brothers and I used to go to the public golf course," George whispers to Callie.
"Don't worry. As long as we kick Karev's ass, we're okay."
"Ready to go?" Palmer asks as he walks toward the group.
They all nod and follow him.
"Christina…I don't know what to do anymore. I always say the wrong thing, and I'm not helping her. She's snapping at me right and left. Yesterday, I climbed out on the roof after her, and she still seemed annoyed with me," Meredith complains.
"Mer, no offense, but it isn't about you. Izzy doesn't owe you thanks for all your efforts, although she might want to thank me for giving up my surgery for her the other day," Christina responds.
"I'm not saying that, its just that she's hard to live with these days…" Meredith stops as she hears a door close, and Izzy emerges from her room looking stunned.
"I gotta go." Meredith says nervously.
"Hi Izzy," Meredith says, tentatively.
"I don't know what to say," Izzy says.
"Iz, I'm sorry. I thought you …" Meredith stammers.
"You thought I was out. I know. Stop apologizing. You're right. I've been awful…ungrateful. You've gone out of your way for me. Dr. Bailey was right. I'm not the only one who was hurt that night. I can't imagine what it was like for you, to find me there. You've tried to help and I've taken my anger out on you. I'm sorry," Izzy says, simply.
"It's okay. I just don't know how to help you," Meredith says.
"I thought of something you can do for me. Get him out of the hospital. Use your influence with the chief to get rid of him," Izzy says.
"I can do that. That's all I wanted. Something concrete that I could do." Meredith says, grateful that the conversation occurred.
