"Contagious indeed!" Iroh chuckled as he moved his pink jasmine tile. Toph considered her next move. Iroh had this Pai Sho set especially made for her. It had carved stone pieces instead of flat tiles so she could 'see' them. They'd been playing together every day at their tea and gossip session and Toph was getting pretty good. Today Iroh was in an especially cheerful mood. So was Toph come to think of it. She'd laughed for a good ten minutes when Iroh first read Katara's letter to her. She'd told her! Oh yeah Sugar queen always saying that she was just observing, that Toph was getting too much sun, that Toph was imaging things, that Toph was crazy. Well crazy that Sugarqueen!
Toph knew what she sensed. She knew what it meant when Sugarqueen's heart skipped a beat whenever Sparky was around. She was blind but she could still see that. Iroh knew what it meant when Zuko looked at Katara with an especially dazed and soppy look. Toph couldn't see this look, but Iroh had described it too her and she concurred with his conclusion. They fancied each other. Everyone could see it. Even Toph. Even Aang, for goodness sake.
Aang was, after all, in possession of both a brain and eyes that worked. He'd figured out which way the wind was blowing. Toph knew that Katara and Zuko would be worried about hurting Aang's feelings. He hadn't been too subtle about his crush on Sweetness, but this was getting ridiculous. Toph and Iroh had united everyday to play Pai Sho, drink tea, gossip and to try and get two of the most stubborn people they knew to just …do something about it already!
"I used to be quite suave with the ladies, but I think this gene has skipped my Nephew entirely."Iroh lamented with a fond sigh. "For years I have been encouraging him to find a nice girl. Now there is one right in front of him. I just don't even know anymore. If she ever tried to kiss him he will probably just offer her a coupon for some free tea." Uncle said with exasperation.
" We can't blame Zuko entirely." Toph said diplomatically. After all Katara thought she could stare and sigh at Zuko's hot body everyday and just dismiss it as medical observation.
"Katara's equally as clueless, in her own special way." She added.
Iroh had gone with the subtle approach and tried to tell Zuko metaphorically that he knew what was going on. And that Zuko should do something about it while they were both still young. And how! Zuko had apparently gotten a bit confused about what Iroh was getting at when they talked. Iroh's tendency to talk in metaphors often had confusing side effects. He was being too subtle. Toph favoured the direct approach. She'd taken to cornering Sugarqueen after her daily "observation" as she called it.
"You're such a pervert! Always checking out Sparky. Why don't you just ask him out already." Toph sighed a little exasperated with her friend. She could feel through the ground that Katara was flabbergasted and doing a wide range of surprised and embarrassed movements. She then settled her stance and put her hands on her hips and said in a justifying tone of voice.
"I wasn't perving – I was observing—for medical reasons!"
"Right" Toph's voice dripped with sarcasm.
"I'm a healer Toph, that's the only reason why I have to watch him." Katara continued.
" Keep telling yourself that Sugarqueen. But I think it means something." Toph said as she turned to walk away.
" You've been getting too much sun Toph. you're just imagining things." Katara called out after her.
She and Iroh had lamented at their lack of progress for weeks. Katara and Zuko just couldn't get out of their own way and get it together. Iroh adopted less subtle tactics but Zuko seemed to willfully misunderstand him. Though what was so hard to misunderstand about she's a pretty girl Zuko, I think she likes you with an accompanying suggestive eyebrow raise, Toph didn't know.
Katara had taken to ignoring Toph comments on the subject completely and would just tell Toph she was going crazy. She'd been even more stubborn than usual lately. Ever since Toph had suggest that Katara should, at a time when she and Zuko were all sitting close together and talking, (like they normally did at the dinner table- that meant something too) Katara should casually slip into conversation the fact that she'd like to have lots of sex and babies with him. Katara hadn't taken this suggestion too well. At all.
She and Iroh had contemplated the merits of just locking them in a room together and seeing what would happen, but they had decided against this idea. If only they had known that all it would take was getting Zuko to sneak out one night. Of course Katara would have to follow him and get all up in his business. It was what she did. That's how Katara rolled.
Why didn't they think of it before? She and Iroh failed at matchmaking. The dynamic duo had been gone one night(One Night!) and voila! Katara could admit Zuko gave her that good indigestion feeling. What would they be willing to admit tomorrow?
Toph moved her white lotus tile, which inevitably made Iroh sigh 'ah the White Lotus Gambit.'
'Your move.' She said with a smirk.
