A/N: Characters belong to Stephenie Meyer (and some dialogue... had to, this did start as New Moon) Trust me on this. It's going to get a whole lot less New Moon-y very soon.

Chapter 7: Secrets and Solutions

My eyes slowly focused. I was in my bed, in a pleasant place between sleeping and waking. As my room changed from large colourful blobs into furniture it hit me. Laurent. Teeth. Meadow. Wolves. Victoria. I gasped and half-fell half-rolled out of bed. I looked to my window but it was still closed. I tried to control my breathing so I could hear if Charlie was still in the house but I couldn't hear anything over my gasping. Clunky footsteps sounded out on the hall and I sighed in relief.

There was a knock on the door and Charlie stuck his head in.

"You okay Bells. I heard a thud." Charlie looked at me sprawled on the floor next to my bed and raised his eyebrow.

"Uh... I fell out of bed. Tangled in my sheets. I'm fine." I explained.

"Okay, kid." He raised a brow, shook his head and then left me to pick myself up.

Last night came back to me now in a rush. After my shower I ran to my room. I had called out to Charlie, telling him I was tired and going straight to bed, instead I spent hours pacing in my room. I didn't know whether to just wait for the inevitable and pray that they left Charlie alone or go out and try to find Laurent and Victoria and just give myself up.

At one point I decided to give myself up. I sat down to write a letter to Alice to explain. Even thinking her name still hurt, she left me too, she never said goodbye. But it hurt less than the obvious alternative. The last time I left the safety of a hotel and friends to meet my death I wrote a letter to someone who loved me. I felt a strange symmetry. Fate had finally caught up with me, and this time I didn't have a protector. I wanted to explain what I was going to do and why, and maybe if Alice still cared about me she wouldn't be too sad at what I did.

Dear Alice...

And that's as far as I got. I tore up the letter and let my head fall to the desk. I stayed there for what felt like hours while the world outside my window got darker and colder. Finally I switched my lamp off and sat in the dark.

Suddenly there was a loud noise outside my window. Victoria. She was here. I was frozen in my seat while the wind howled outside. Then I heard the noise again. It was the tree outside my window, straining in the wind it scratched at my window.

I jumped up, and like a child, I ran to my bed and hid under the covers. Hiding from the monsters, cowering, shaking and praying that I would live through the night. I must have fallen asleep after that.

Now I didn't know what to do, so I did nothing. I decided to go on my life, if that's what it was, as normally as possible for as long as possible.

The next three days were bad. I jumped at the slightest noise, chest hurt from the erratic breathing and my heart never really slowed it's quick pumping. I only slept when I absolutely had to. I roused myself each morning to listen for Charlie and see whether he'd lived through the night.

I had finished my shift at Newton's. It was dark already and the air was so icy it hurt to breathe. Key in hand, I walked swiftly to my truck, my eyes scanning the area. I knew that if a vampire didn't want to be seen, then they wouldn't, but I did it anyway. Just as I reached my truck a black shadow appeared next to me.

My scream was cut short when a hand clamped on my mouth. I dropped my key and stumbled back onto the truck.

"Bella, it's just me."

"Jake?" I gasped out. My chest was heaving and I couldn't stop shaking. Jacob looked at me shaking, shuddering and trying to breathe.

"Bells, you okay?"

I started to laugh. I knew I was hysterical.

"Okay? I'm just fine and dandy." I giggled and then collapsed on the frozen ground and sobbed while I hugged my knees.

The old Jacob would have hugged me. This new Jacob looked like he wanted to but he held back with a myriad of emotions crossing his face. After a couple of minutes I got myself under some semblance of control.

"What are you doing here Jacob?"

"I want to try keep my promise."

"The one where you promised never to hurt me and always be there for me or the one where you promised you'd cut your hair and treat me like dirt? Because at the moment, you're only keeping one of those promises." I snorted and then started walking around to look for the key I'd dropped. Jacob, realising what I was doing had it in his hands within seconds. He passed it to me. As his hand touched mine I was shocked at the heat in his palm. The weather was icy, my nose was numb, and Jacob's hand was toasty.

"I'm so sorry Bella. I want to explain. But I can't." He sighed. He looked so pained I was reminded of the old Jacob; the one who was scared of Sam, who just wanted to be my friend. He still needed me.

"You can tell me anything. Is it about Sam? Let me help you." I reached out and took his hand.

"I can't." He despaired. Then his face lit up. "But the thing is you already know my secret. I already told you." I was confused. "Bella, haven't you ever had a secret, something you never told anyone else because it wasn't your secret to tell?"

The Cullens. That had been my secret. Jacob was looking at me pointedly. Vampires had been my secret, but it was Jacob that had told me that secret.

"Don't you remember when I told you–" he took a breath. Like he couldn't force out the words. He then tried another angle "that day on the beach?" He prompted.

"Where you told me about the vamp... Cold Ones?"

Jacob looked pained. "I shouldn't be surprised that's the story you remember."

"I don't remember anything else, Jacob."

"But you will. When you do come and see me. If you want to, that is."

I was about to reply 'Of course I want to see you' but he'd already turned away and was running down the street.

I drove home, and for the first time in three days I wasn't thinking about Victoria and my impending death but rather I was trying to work out Jacob Black's secret. Dinner was made for Charlie, although I wasn't present in mind. I managed to burn myself while cooking, I was so distracted. While running the burn under the tap, I cast my mind back to the day at the beach. I remembered the myth, the Cold Ones – the vampires. There was something about a treaty between the Cullens and the Quileutes. But there must have been something I was missing. I nearly growled in frustration.

"You here Bells?"

"Huh?" Charlie dragged me back to the present.

"You've had your hand under that faucet for five minutes. You okay?"

"Oh. Yeah, I'm fine Dad. I was just thinking." I turned off the tap and sat at the table to join Charlie for dinner.

"Have you made up with Jake?" Charlie looked me in the eye, desperate to see some light there again. I'm sure all he'd seen there recently was terror, exhaustion and depression.

"No. He won't speak to me. But I'll work it out." As soon as I said that words, I knew it was true. Yes, Jacob had left me. He might have had a good reason. But I now knew that a proper relationship had to be equal. If he had a reason then we would work it out together.

"I knew you would honey."

I guess I was doing with Jacob what I should have done four months ago: Stand my ground, be strong, work things out. But I promised myself to do better. I would eat better, sleep better, be stronger, fight for what I wanted, work out Jacob's secret. I only hoped that I would live long enough to do so.

I paced my room. I never used to be a pacer. It was a habit I'd picked up from...someone. After pacing and trying desperately to recall every word Jacob had said for over an hour, I threw myself into my chair and turned on my computer.

Replying to Renee's emails kept my busy for a bit but Jacob still loomed large in my mind. On a whim I opened another window and searched 'Quileute Legends'. I knew what Jacob had told me was part of that legend story. I was hoping to find something that would trigger my memory. I chewed on a lock of my hair as my eyes skimmed over the hokey home-made website that I'd found. Suddenly my eyes hit a word. Wolf.

The beliefs of the Quileute tribe varied over time. The Quileute creation legend says that a traveling shape shifter came upon a wolf and transformed him into a human being, creating the first Quileute.

Then Jacob's voice sounded in my head. The right memory returned to me.

"Another legend claims that we descended from wolves." The scary story Jacob shared with me on that bleached driftwood tree. Where he jokingly broke a treaty he didn't believe in.

"The cold ones are the natural enemy of the wolf – well not the wolf, really, but the wolves who turn into men, like our ancestors. You would call them..."

"Werewolf." I whispered. It couldn't be real. Surely one mythical creature was enough for a lifetime. Vampires I could deal with. Trying to contemplate the existence of werewolves was almost too much for my exhausted mind.

Jacob was a werewolf. That didn't seem right. This was Jacob, my Jacob.

The boy with long hair.

The boy who could rebuild car engines from scratch.

The boy who smiled so easily.

The boy who was hurt at the loss of his friends.

The boy who made me smile, who made me feel normal again.

Was now a werewolf who cut his hair, who hurt me, who had joined Sam's gang.

I had to know everything. Glancing at my clock I saw it was late. After ten. But I had to know. I grabbed my keys and ran downstairs. Charlie was staring at the television, his eyes glazed over. He looked ready for bed.

"Dad, I need to go and see Jacob."

"It's a bit late for social calls Bella."

"Please, I won't be long. I just have to speak to him." I didn't want to ask permission, because even if Charlie refused I was still going. But I had put him through so much, I felt I had to do right by him.

"Come back soon. I'll be waiting up for you." It was permission and a time limit. I thanked him and ran out of the door.

He heard my truck approaching and was waiting for me on the porch. I left my truck and stayed there.

"That was quick."

"Google." I replied. Jacob rolled his eyes. He then crossed his arms and looked at me, waiting for me to say something. There was about five yards between us. But it felt like a black hole. A huge vacuum that engulfed any familiarity our friendship had had. Neither of us moved. I finally said the word.

"Werewolf?"

"So you remembered." It wasn't a question. He just looked at me, his arms folded across his chest. His eyes were wary. I let go of the breath I'd been holding when he confirmed my theory. My breath swirled in front of me in the cold air.

"Is there any way to fix it? To stop it happening? There must be some way to undo what Sam did to you?" I was desperate to help my friend.

At the mention of Sam's name Jacob's eyes flashed.

"It wasn't Sam who did this to me. It was your precious Cullens." Jacob's voice was loud in the silent foggy night. The venom in his voice when he said their name stung my heart. I wrapped my arms around me and took a step back. No matter how much I tried to avoid that name, it came back to me again and again. I looked at Jacob and he saw me backing away from him, my arms holding me together.

"This isn't fair Bella. You worshipped those leeches. You hung around them, talked with them and God knows what else you did, as if they were normal people and yet you're terrified of me." He left the porch and cross the void between us in three large steps. He gripped my shoulders and looked me in the eye. "It isn't Sam's fault I changed. It's theirs!"

"How? They didn't even know about you. They wouldn't hurt people this way." I protested. No matter what they did to me, I would always defend them.

"They didn't have to do anything other than exist. Their stinking presence brought this out in us." Jacob's eyes glistened. An ancient sadness swam in his eyes, a melancholy that wasn't just his own. I was sure of it.

"How can I help you, Jake?"

At this plea, Jacob moved his arms around me and dropped his head to my shoulder. He just wanted to be held and God knows I needed a hug. We stood in each other's arms silently for a while.

"Jake, I have to go. Charlie is waiting up for me." I pulled back out of his warm embrace.

"We need to talk more." Jacob was unwilling to let me go.

"I know. But it's going to have to wait."

A sudden noise out in the darkness behind me had my heart beating and my head buried into Jacob's shoulder.

"What's the matter, Bells? You're terrified."

"It's nothing. I have problems too, Jake."

"Right," Jacob said, opening the door to my truck. "I'll drive you talk."

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