Author's Note: Thank you all for the reviews and keep them coming! Oh, and, please, please don't hate me…
Disclaimer: I am not Stephanie Meyer.
The New Host
Chapter Seven
Moving On
Wanda seemed to rethink that statement the moment it left her lips. Ian held his breath. "I mean… I want you to make love to me… or… yes… that's it! Because you know what you're doing. Yes. You'll make love to me." She was bright pink saying it but finally seemed satisfied with her declaration. Ian waited a moment longer, letting her words sink in.
He tugged his hands out of hers and placed them on her hips as he sat up. He blinked a couple of times, trying to rid the sleep from his eyes. "Can we talk about this when we get home, Wanda?" He was sure she was only saying this because he was fighting with Jared yesterday. He was not going to take her virginity unless it was something she really wanted. He wanted her motivated by love not fear.
"I've made up my mind, Ian," she said. "You can talk about it all you want, but I know what's going to happen when we get home."
Her voice, usually so timid when they spoke about intimacy, was strong and sure. He blinked again. "Really?" she nodded. "And what's that?"
"We'll check on Jamie, tell him most everything that happened- you will not talk to him about fighting! I don't want him thinking that's okay! - you and I will visit Doc and you will let him fix all of this. And then we'll take a bath and spend the rest of the day in our room- making love."
Ian smiled, he couldn't help but like that plan. "And I can talk all I want but that's what's going to happen?"
"Yes."
He pressed his lips to hers, smiling. But, unfortunately, as soon as they got up and ready to leave it became clear that that wasn't what was going to happen. Mel, Jared, Sunny, Kyle, Ian and Wanda stood waiting in the large cavern, while a ways away Jeb stood with Nate, Lily and Rob, talking quietly. After several minutes, Lily and Jeb hugged and he came over.
When he spoke, Ian already knew what he was going to say. "Lily's staying here."
Wanda gasped. Lily had been one of her first friends in the caves. She rushed over and wrapped her arms around her friend. They all approached to say their goodbyes. Rob kept a hand on Lily's shoulder, silently supporting her while she wiped away Wanda's tears and Wanda wiped away hers. Ian gently but firmly pulled Wanda away so the others could say farewell.
"I'm going to miss you so much!" Wanda nearly wailed.
"It's not like I'm leaving forever," Lily reassured her. "I'll come visit." She laughed a little. "I have to come back to pick up my things at least." Wanda gave her a watery smile.
"We'll keep her safe, Wanderer," Nate promised.
"I'm holding you to that," Jeb said, trying to sound gruff but his voice came out a bit wobbly. This would be the first time their little community lost a member to anything other than death.
The others hugged Lily, said their goodbyes and turned away to hide their upset. Everyone thought of Wes, of how much and how long he had loved Lily, and they all knew, without saying, that he would have wanted her to find happiness wherever she could if she couldn't find it with him. And now he was off with God and she was still here and she deserved to be happy.
Wanda clung to Ian, forcing him to half drag her on their blindfolded trip back to the van. Even given back their sight, no one seemed fit to drive except for Jared, who was best at hiding his emotions. Wanda sat on Ian's lap, staring blankly out the window. He knew that she was happy Lily would find some peace but… no one was happy about losing her and no one was looking forward to telling the others.
Wanda tensed in his arms. Her hand smacked against the window. "Jared, stop! Stop!" He slammed on the brakes. "There's a car back there! By the side of the road."
Everyone gave her varying looks of confusion. "So?" Jared asked.
"There was someone slumped over- I- I think. Please just let me check!" She was already fumbling for the latch.
"Wait, Wanda," Ian stopped her searching hands.
Mel was arching her neck and squinting at the car, fairly far behind them. Ian looked too. They had driven out of the corn and all around them now was desert. This beat up four door sedan looked like it was trying and failing to hide behind some cactus and barely discernable was a figure slumped over the driver's seat into the passenger's.
"There's definitely someone in there," Ian said. "Probably dead in this heat." The sun hadn't risen yet but the heat was already pounding on the land.
"We have to check!" Wanda insisted, tugging at the door once more.
"Wait!" Jeb ordered, she stopped. "Jared swing the van around. Wanda and Sunny go take a look-"
"Jeb!" Kyle started.
"I'm not taking any chances, Kyle!" he said. "I doubt it's one of theirs but if it is- I don't want them seeing us. If it is one of theirs we can stop by somewhere and make a call about it. But if it is a soul it wouldn't be trying to hide. Jared, go."
The van made a U-turn. As soon as they were idling by the side of the road, Wanda jumped out with Sunny, tentatively, behind her. Ian watched as she ran to the car, yanked the door open, and jumped back. She turned to Sunny and pointed back at the van, talking frantically. Sunny rushed back while Wanda squeezed into the sedan.
"What is it, Sunny?" Kyle asked.
"A woman," she said. "Wanda thinks she's pregnant. We need water!"
Sunny stayed at the van with Mel and Jared. Their insurance in case any Seekers stopped to see what they were up to. Ian tugged Wanda away, not wanting her to be the one to discover the woman was dead. Jeb and Kyle pulled her out of the car and carried her back to the van. They peeled off, still going under the speed limit, as soon as the doors were closed and everyone was inside. Jeb knelt over her in the cramped space, checking her pulse. Wanda cradled her head on her lap, tears, once more, streaming down her face. The woman had long black hair and tan skin, her cheeks sharp and lips full and her stomach showing her to be heavily pregnant. Ian reached out and lay a hand on her rounded belly. It was still.
"Is she going to be okay?" Sunny asked, ringing her hands.
Jeb was quiet, still searching for her heart beat. Wanda bent over placing her lips next to the unconscious woman's ear and began whispering to her. After a moment Jeb exhaled. He snatched up a canteen of water and began dripping it down her throat with Wanda's help. It took a few minutes but her hands came up, seeking the source of the life giving liquid. She coughed and gasped but flailed when Jeb pulled the canteen away. With her eyes still closed it was impossible to tell which species she belonged to. But the more Ian thought, the less likely it seemed she was a soul. When her eyes did open, Jeb shined a flash light over her flat human eyes and everyone exhaled a sigh of relief.
"Get off the road and gun it, Howe," Jeb ordered. "We need to get her to Doc and Candy yesterday."
She began to moan as she became more aware of herself. She caught sight of Wanda- still cradling her head- and panicked, flailing about. Ian snatched her away. "No! No! Please! Please! Think of my baby! Don't take its mother away! Please!" she begged.
Wanda turned her head into Ian shoulder and sobbed. "No one is going to take you away from your child," Jeb said, gruffly. He wasn't used to comforting.
"Look at us," Ian said, pointing at himself, Jeb, Kyle, Mel, and Jared. Jeb flashed his light at each of their eyes, avoiding Wanda and Sunny. "We're human," Ian tried to calm her. She was still lying down, her arms settled on her stomach, holding it as she tried to cry. Mel twisted back and laid a hand on the sobbing woman's back.
"It's all going to be all right," she said, stiffly- no more used to comforting pregnant women than Jeb. "We're all mostly human here. And we want to help. We'll keep you and your baby safe. Just try to calm down. We don't want to call attention to ourselves."
She slumped down, dry heaving, having no water left in her system to form tears. Jeb helped her drink more, while Jared took them straight through the desert. Without being told he drove the van right up to the cave entrance. Doc needed to see to his new patient immediately. Jared and Mel would hide the van once its sickest occupant was on her way to Doc. Before the vehicle had fully stopped, Wanda had the door open and was running. Ian took off after her. It didn't take long to catch up. He barely paused to throw her over his shoulder and continue on to the hospital. They were lucky to find Doc on his way back with Candy from breakfast. Ian barely had to explain before both were running to the van.
Wanda made to follow them, but Ian stopped her. He was fairly sure that the woman wasn't exactly lucid at the moment, and wasn't aware that she would be living with two of the creatures she was clearly afraid of. Wanda had been so upset when she'd frightened the woman in the van, and Ian didn't want her to be there when the woman found out she would be living with souls. But when the group carrying the pregnant woman came back through, Ian let her follow because everyone was.
Being the tiniest adult did have some benefits. She wiggled her way to the front. Doc and Candy had shoed everyone but Jeb, Mel- who the unnamed woman had latched onto and not let go of- and Jared out of the hospital, now they were all crowded in the hall whispering about the newcomer. Trudy elbowed her way through, took care to sidestep Wanda, with a tray of food.
Candy and Trudy took over comforting her, allowing Mel and Jared to go move the van back to its hiding place. It took some encouraging and Jeb, Candy, Trudy and Doc's kindness to coax her into sharing anything, let alone how she'd ended up in Arizona. Thus far she'd only told them her name. "M-m-marna. M-marna M-malar." She was still severely dehydrated, all she managed was some dry heaving but she couldn't seem to stop.
It took some convincing but Candy got Marna to open her mouth for the sheet of No Pain and a gulp of water. After that she seemed to calm down. Jeb knew better than to ask her about how and why she was here just yet, even so she kept her mouth clamped shut, her arms wrapped around her stomach. Ian was sure that all the strangers standing at the door weren't helping. It was obvious she had been on the run, avoiding prolonged interaction with anyone and now she had thirty some people staring at her in what was probably her lowest moment.
Wanda looked up at him. She'd realized it too. Standing at the front of the pack, Ian turned, "All right, everybody! Let's give her some space!" he called. Reluctantly the crowd dispersed, returning to their chores.
Wanda weaved her way easily through the crowd, quickly disappearing. Ian had a harder time. Everyone moved out of Wanda's way these days, but Ian hadn't switched into a more petite, adorable body, and was treated the same as always. He looked for her in the large cave, but there was no tiny blond in sight. Unsure, and not liking her being out his sight, Ian started back for their room. Passing Walt's old room he heard sobbing and stopped, until he recognized the voice he now associated with Sunny.
"I didn't mean to! I didn't mean to!" she wailed.
"Shh… Sunny… I know, I know," Kyle soothed her.
Ian kept going. Their room was empty. He stopped and thought. And then I occurred to him- her plan. He rushed back the way he came, all the way down to the baths. From within the darkened bath he heard the watering moving.
"Wanda?"
"Ian? Where have been?" she asked, sounding affronted.
He laughed. "Looking for you." He tugged his clothes off in the darkness and sat on the lip of the bath, his legs submerged. "Not everyone moves so easily through a crowd, you know?"
She giggled, Ian realized how close she was. Her hands settled on his knees, toying with the light smattering of hair. Before she could explore any further he stepped into the water. He slipped an arm around her waist, hauling her to his chest. This was a common pose for them in the bath. It was the only time that Ian let her feel all of him pressed against her. It was completely dark but they could both see with their bodies, imagining with their mind's eye. Ian had felt Wanda's breasts pressed against his chest, with his mouth and hands but he had never seen them, properly seen them in full light or really any light other than the moon and the stars.
Before Ian could kiss her, she pulled away. "What is it, love?" His arms loosened, worried.
"Have you spoken to Doc or Candy about your injuries?" she asked.
He relaxed. "It's not as bad as it looks." Ian dipped down again, but Wanda evaded him once more. "Trust me, baby, it doesn't hurt." He finally managed to catch her lips. His lower lip was a bit sore but it was worth it. "I love you so much, Wanda," he whispered against her throat.
His lips traced up and down her throat and let his mind wander, just enjoying the feel of her in his arms. Losing Lily and then Marna coming into their lives. Every day with his Wanderer was an adventure it seemed. From the first time he had any interaction with her his life had been in upheaval. He tangled his fingers in her hair, tilting her head to the side while he licked and sucked his way all over her chin, down to her collar bone. That first day came back to him with avengeance; he squeezed Wanda to his chest, as tightly as he was able. If he had succeeded… the thought that he could have been responsible for the destruction of his own happiness was beyond anything he could possibly conceive of.
He could have destroyed his life, his future, his love, all in one moment of blindness and bigotry.
Wanda, her hands gripping his biceps, seemed entirely oblivious to his internal distress. In fact he could feel her smiling against his temple. "Wanda," his voice cracked. He had to say something. "I never apologized- I never made it up to you- I-"
"Ian? What's going on? What are you talking about?"
"I almost k-k-k-" He couldn't get the word out. "I almost ended your-" That wasn't any better. "I could have- I could have- you could have died…"
She pulled away, holding his cheeks in her hands. "Ian, please, stop." He pressed his lips together. "You are the most forgiving man, the most understanding man I've ever met…
"I can forgive too, I can understand too. When I arrived you didn't know me, or love me or care about me at all. You were afraid and you wanted to protect your community. I could never blame you for that. And you've more than made up for it."
Ian tucked his head into her shoulder, his eyes squeezed closed. Her words were just as healing as always. Her never ending understanding and forgiveness comforted him now, when often it bothered him. Today, though, right now, he let her sooth him when she should have condemned him. But she never would. She never condemned Kyle for trying a lot harder than he had to kill her. She never said a word about how terrible Sharon and Maggie were to her. She was everything good in the universe, and he'd tried to take her life away.
"Do you know what I saw, what I thought about as Doc took me out of Mel?" she asked. Ian shook his head. He'd been meaning to ask her, as Jared suggested, but everything got so tangled up while they were at Nate's it had slipped his mind. "At first everything seemed black but it wasn't… it was blue."
"Blue?" He couldn't see where this was going. Too consumed by emotion.
"Blue, deep sapphire blue. That can be scorching and warm and loving all at the same time. A comforting blue that let me drift away with no fear at all… And when I woke up, when I found your eyes, I thought… the whole universe is blue."
Ian squeezed her so hard to him he was sure he must be hurting her, but he couldn't seem to help himself. She had seen the blue of his eyes as she drifted away, as she nearly died. The last image her mind had been conscious of had been an image of him. He had never felt so loved, so humbled, so cherished by another person in all his life.
"If you had left me, Wanda," he said, his eyes feeling uncomfortably wet, "you would have been my last thought too."
"Oh, Ian! Don't talk like that!"
"Then don't leave me," he said, simply.
She pressed her lips to his and spoke against his mouth, "Never."
They kissed leisurely for several minutes before Ian made up his mind. "Get back to our room, Wanda, I'll meet you there."
"Where are you going?" Her arms tightened around him, not ready to let him go. But this was important.
"To Doc, to get you some No Pain."
